


Blood and Coffee

by LateNiteSlacker, sachi_sama



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Coffee, Cute, Demons, Fluff, Ghosts, M/M, Magic, Magic-Users, Past Sexual Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Vampires
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-25
Updated: 2017-10-12
Packaged: 2018-02-26 23:11:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 106,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2669915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LateNiteSlacker/pseuds/LateNiteSlacker, https://archiveofourown.org/users/sachi_sama/pseuds/sachi_sama
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dirk swore he'd never put a human in danger again, not after his past mistakes. But after a chance encounter at a local coffee shop, he admits something more than the coffee is drawing him back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Vampire and His Barista

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a delightful little collaborative fic written by the wonderful Sachi-Sama and myself, LateNiteSlacker! I write Dirk, and Sachi writes Jake. We are switching off chapters to give you the BEST possible experience! Now in 3D!
> 
> But seriously, we hope that you enjoy reading this fic as much as we've loved writing it! It stems from an RP mostly sent over text messages as we helped each other through our respective dreadful work days and nights. It's been a little bright spot of happiness for us both. And hopefully it will be for you too. That said, enjoy!

Halloween.  You love it and hate it.

Usually you just hate it, because stupid teenagers make the night a living hell for you.  But tonight, you have a good reason to love it.  This Halloween is different than the rest.

This Halloween, Jake English is wearing a witch hat.

You are Dirk Strider.  You’re a vampire with an affection for a certain coffee shop barista that probably borders on obsession.

No, wait.  It’s definitely obsession.

Despite your work fighting demons and kicking their asses back to Derse where they belong, you take time every evening to frequent the local coffee store down the street.  Namely to admire the eye-candy behind the counter in the form of one highly attractive Jake English.

You walk into the shop and stand in line behind a group of teenage girls dressed as slutty nurses and devils.  Despite the cold and stony exterior everyone says you have, you feel a small smile come to your face as you watch the barista hard at work behind the counter.

It’s Jake.  Your favorite adorable barista.

You watch Jake smile charmingly at the girls while he hands them their sugary drinks.  It could be your imagination, but you think his smile widens when he sees you in line.

“Strider!” He says with that sinfully attractive smile on his face.  In his excitement to wave to you, the witch hat he’s wearing tips slightly over his eyes, and he laughs, pushing it back.  “I was wondering when you’d show!  Happy Halloween, eh?”

Jake is so fucking cute in that hat that it’s unfair.  You want to tell him that, but he’s not quite your boyfriend yet, as much as you want him to be. “Right on time. Happy Halloween, English.  Nice hat.” With a small smirk you flip the wide brim of the witch hat playfully, noticing that it actually looks pretty worn.  You wonder if he wears this hat every Halloween.

Jake laughs and swats your hand away.  “Shall I get your regular or were you looking to be a bit more festive today?”

“How about a Jake special?” You suggest.  “Be daring.  Be bold.”

“Right-o!  One daring and bold drink coming up!” He says, practically skipping off to begin making your drink.  Fuck is he cute.

You notice that there isn’t really much of a line behind you, so you’re clear to take up Jake’s time as much as you want.  “How’s the night been?  Any interesting costumes?”

Jake looks like he’s mixing more than the usual vanilla creamer with your coffee tonight.  There’s a look of concentration on his face that only adds to his adorableness.  As he mixes just the right blend of flavors together, he says, “eh, you know how it is. Mostly half-dressed high school students. There have been a couple of adorable little kids though!  I gave a cookie to Iron Man and he promised to buy me a pony in return.”

“How generous of him,” you remark, leaning against the counter and watching as Jake turns around this way and that to make your drink. You love watching Jake work. You could easily watch him all night, and on occasion, you have stayed with him till the shop closes, chatting the night away.

“What about you?” Jake asks, swirling a bit of whipped cream on top, even though you know you’ve told him you don’t like it much before. “Any plans tonight?”

Despite your demon hunting profession, things have been remarkably quiet lately.  Sometimes trouble stirs up around the graveyard on Halloween, usually from teens messing with things they shouldn’t.  But you doubt that will happen for a few hours, after prime trick or treating time.  That leaves you with plenty of time to watch your favorite barista work.  “Might check out the graveyard later, but I’m free till then.  How about you?”

“Off in about twenty more minutes actually!” Jake exclaims with excitement, handing you your drink and grinning toothily.  “I call this the cool guy special. You wanna kill time with me till your graveyard shenanigans?”

“Cool guy, huh?” you ask, smirking and taking the drink. You don’t care much for the whipped cream, but you’ve seen the way Jake stares when you lick it off the top. So you take your time, swooping your tongue along the perfect peak of cream that Jake created.  You scoop the cream up and swallow it before placing a lid on the warm pumpkin flavored drink and sipping it.  Of course it’s delicious. Everything Jake makes is.  “I suppose this cool guy could be convinced to hang out a little longer.”

Jake watches you carefully the whole time, and you smirk a little inside as you note the way his face heats up while you put on that show. “Splendid!” he stammers quickly, leaning on the counter beside you. As if he’s looking for a distraction, he quickly asks, “are you dressing up as anything?”

You love the way Jake watches you.  And you love the way he blushes and stammers afterwards, as if he’s guilty of doing something wrong.  If you didn’t know better, you’d think your feelings for each other might be mutual. No, you know they are, but you can’t bring yourself to say anything. It wouldn’t be fair to involve Jake in your life, considering what you are and what you do for a living.

Jake would always be in danger.  From the demons you hunt… and from yourself.  You’re a demon too, after all, and your past is far from clean.

No, it’s much better to keep your attractive barista crush alive for another day of ogling at the coffee shop. When you hear Jake’s question, you spread your hands apologetically and reply, “just a cool guy at your service.”

Jake laughs a little too loudly in a manner that can only be described as a giggle. It’s the most beautiful thing in the whole world, and you’d love to hear more of it.  Jake stifles it far too quickly for your liking.

Before you can say anything else, you sense an unpleasant presence approaching.  You’re scowling inside before Cronus even enters the establishment.  When the door chimes, you watch Jake stand up straight to greet his customer, groaning a bit as he says, “Welcome…”

Even though he’s harmless, Cronus is a lesser demon and a nuisance.  When he enters, you murmur, “here to cause problems again, Ampora?”

Cronus smiles a bit too widely for your liking, and you just know he’s going to be a bother.  He swaggers to the counter and says, “Strider, fancy meeting you here.  You come to stare at sugar-butt too?”

You frown as Cronus smiles even wider at Jake.  “I’ll have a caramel mocha. EXTRA creamy.” He punctuates that last statement with a wink.

Jake doesn’t say a word, but he does flush at Cronus’s lewd remark.  You want to deck the demon right here and now, but you also can’t cause a scene.

Not in the coffee shop.  Not in front of Jake.

Maybe later.

“Don’t gotta be all shy, baby,” Cronus says.  “If you’re gonna turn red, I can think of other things to really make that blush spread.”

Don’t start a scene.  Don’t start a scene.

You eye Cronus venomously and say, “Why don’t you stop harassing him?  Jake’s too nice to say anything, but I’m not.”

“Wvhy Strider, you got a little schoolgirl crush goin on?”  He responds cheekily.

“It’s fine Dirk,” Jake says.  You know it’s because he is trying to keep the peace and his job.  Stiffly, almost robotically, he hands Cronus his drink with a forced smile.  “Here you are Mr. Ampora!  Extra Creamy the way you like.”

Cronus sips from the drink but unfortunately shows no sign of leaving.  “You knowv me so vwell.  I think wve should get to knowv each other better.  Like wvhat you got goin’ on under that apron.” He says with a wink.

You feel the fury building deep inside, but you really don’t want to cause a problem for Jake.  This job is Jake’s livelihood, and if there’s an incident during his shift, it will reflect poorly on him.  Besides, Cronus knows exactly what you are.

If Jake were ever to find out, you would have to stop coming here.  The general populace doesn’t tend to take kindly to demons in their midst.  Jake would probably be scared of you.  He might try to alert the local authorities, which would definitely be the worst, because then you wouldn’t be able to see Jake anymore.

You wouldn’t be able to see Jake anymore.

The thought hits you like a freight train and you instantly feel sick to your stomach.  You’ve only known Jake for a few months now, but the thought of never seeing him again is one you can’t entertain.

Of course, all demons have a policy of keeping each other’s secrets, but you don’t completely trust Cronus. “You got your drink, now you can leave and stop bothering us.”

But Cronus doesn’t seem like he’s in any hurry to leave. His smile widens again as he says, “vwhat a lovesick fool!  But I like sweetcake’s butt too.  No sign on the door saying vwe can’t share… I’m sure he tastes better than that coffee.  Isn’t that right, Jake?”

“Erm…” Jake laughs nervously.  “I… I wouldn’t know. I’ve never tasted myself!”

Cronus leans extremely close to Jake, their faces centimeters apart.  In a far too seductive voice, he murmurs, “so let me find out, doll face.”

You are going to kill him.  You can’t take it anymore, and you find yourself growling before roughly shoving Cronus away from Jake.  Your eyes are full of vindication as Cronus sputters, his drink splashing a little on the floor when he’s thrown back.  You growl, “get AWAY from him! Nobody wants your disgusting tongue down their throat.”

Jake hops over the counter to stand between you two. “Now you listen here!  No tomfoolery will be had in my presence!” He places his hand daringly on your chest. This is as close as you’ve ever been, and even though he’s technically being diplomatic right now, some small part of you loves the fact that he’s touching you.  Jake English is actually touching you.

You’re paralyzed, unable to believe how incredibly warm he is.

His love.  His caring.  His trust in the world that he knows nothing about.

And suddenly you realize it.

You’ve fallen ridiculously hard for Jake English.

A human.

Jake Fucking Human English.

You’re certain that if Dave knew about this, he would adapt Romeo and Juliet to you and Jake, make a shitty webcomic about it, sell millions of dollars worth of merchandise, and have all the little preteens getting their panties in a bundle over your doomed love-life.

And really, who are you kidding?  Of course Dave knows about this.  He makes it a point to know everything about your life like the little snot he is.  He’s probably already a few thousand dollars into the profit margin with his shitty t-shirts of you and Jake.

You push the thoughts of your obnoxious brother aside and instead think about Jake.  You’ve fallen for him, and you don’t want anything to hurt him in any way.  Definitely not a lecherous Ampora.  

But, you’re unable to do anything but listen as Jake says, “Mr. Ampora, would you like a few napkins?  Your next drink can be on me.”

Cronus stares between you and Jake for a moment before a mischievous grin stretches across his face.  “On you, huh?” After saying that, he has the gall to lean in close and kiss Jake’s cheek. “Can I lick it off?”

Finally, you lose it, grabbing Jake away from the other demon and holding your crush closely by the torso.  It’s risky, because if you’re wrong about Jake, he may never talk to you again. But you have to make Cronus stop bothering Jake for good.  Turning his head with the palm of your hand so Jake can’t see your face, you lower your shades and show Cronus your vivid orange eyes.  “Go away, Cronus.  He’s mine.”

Cronus catches your possessive drift immediately, recognizing that look. He knows what you’re implying.  Whether it’s true or not, you’re saying Jake is your human.  And vampires are very protective and picky about who interacts with their chosen human.

Of course, Jake is not your human.  Not yet.  He’s not even your boyfriend yet, but Cronus doesn’t have to know that.

Scoffing, Cronus brushes himself off.  “Your kind are no fun, Strider.” He frowns but decides not to cause more of a scene. “Later sugar-butt. Maybe I’ll see you again if the Chief gets bored with you.”

And with that, he finally leaves the store.

About fucking time.

Jake stands in your hold for a moment, listening to the bell chime to signal Cronus’s departure.  The customers, the couple that are left in the store after that fiasco, finally stop gaping and go back to their own conversation.

Jake looks at you and frowns crossly, “that Cronus, where does he get off acting like he’s the queen of France?!”

“I like that you chose Queen,” you comment.

Jake rolls his eyes, “it’s true. And hush you!  You caused a big enough commotion as is!”

“Yeah, I know,” you agree somewhat sheepishly.  “I can go now. Get on with my graveyard shenanigans.”

“No!” Jake exclaims quickly, then flushes a bit and speaks again, a little quieter this time.  “I mean, couldn’t you stay a bit and perhaps keep me company until my shift is over?  It shan't be too much longer, I assure you, old chum!”

How could you possibly say no?  With words like “shan’t” and “old chum” Jake’s going to make you fucking swoon.  So you swoon yourself into one of those comfortable seats against the wall.  It gives you a perfect view of Jake as he bustles to attend to the line of customers that suddenly stream into the shop.  It’s a win-win situation, regardless of which direction he’s facing.  If he’s looking your way, you get to see that cute little smile as he greets each customer.  If he turns around to blend a drink, you get that cute butt that’s just begging to be touched.

Suddenly, your vision grows just a shade darker, and red text appears in front of your face.  You’re staring again.

You frown.  This is undoubtedly one of the biggest drawbacks of having your ex-lover’s ghost trapped in your shades, able to watch everything you see and do.

It’s a long story that you’re not going to think about right now.  Instead, you think back, since your ex-lover’s ghost can hear all of your thoughts.  “You can stare just as well as I can, Hal.”

Damn straight I can.  Oh no.  Wait.  Let me fucking swoon into this chair since my little princess knees can’t handle the thought of barista Jake English blinking in my direction! Hal sends back to you.

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re jealous,” you think back smugly.

You do know better.  I am. Hal admits pointedly.

“At least you’re honest.”

I’ve always been honest with you.  And look where it got me. Hal comments snidely.

“Hal, please.  Can we not do this right now?” You think back wearily.

Sure thing, _old chum_.  We’ve got a whole long lifetime for me to remind you of your faults.  Of which you have many.  Many many faults.

“Is there a reason you’re pestering me?” you ask.

Jake English.  You’re obviously in love with him.  I may be jealous as fuck but I can see that.

“Yeah so?”  you ask, knowing that it’s pointless to argue with someone who can read your thoughts.

So you need to stop beating around the bush and tap that ass.

Suddenly, your vision goes completely dark, and you realize that it’s because something’s been thrown over your head.  Hal’s words disappear from your view, and you hear that adorable tell-tale giggling.  Lifting the offending item, which happens to be the witch hat Jake was wearing, off your head, you see Jake beaming down at you.

“You dork,” you grin, standing and placing the hat back on Jake’s head.  “I think it suits you better.”

“Why thank you!” he says, adjusting the hat on top of his head.  “It’s been around in my family for ages!  Gramma says it’s actually magic.”

You watch with amusement as Jake reaches forward and attempts to fix your hair where the hat has flattened it.  He looks so fucking adorable, catching his lower lip in between his teeth as he focuses on making your hair the perfection you crafted it into earlier.  Which is impossible, you might add.

“There we are, good as new!” he says, laughing a little.

You’re letting him touch your perfect hair?  Le gasp.  Hal’s words flood briefly across your vision before disappearing.  You choose to ignore him.

“Actual magic?”  You ask instead.  “Don’t tell me you’re planning on causing trouble in the graveyard like those teens.”

“Gramma would boil me alive if I were to do such a thing!  Spirits are not meant to be trifled with, and if they are behaving in such a way there is always a reason!” Jake says, far more adamantly than you expected.  “Needless to say, I believe in a lot of things that other people likely think are only pretend.  But I’ve seen too much in my life to think this is all there is to it.”

Well spoken.  Give the kid a fucking medal. Hal sends, and you know it’s sarcastic.

Again, you ignore him and think about your little crush.  You’re not sure whether it’s good or bad that Jake believes in so many things. You wonder briefly if he believes in vampires too, but you aren’t about to ask him something like that.  Instead, you smirk and murmur, “Sounds like you’ve got a lot of thoughts in that head of yours.”

You try to take a sip of your coffee but realize that it’s empty.  Frowning at the cup, you toss it in a nearby trash can.  “Empty already?  Fuck. The world is a sad and cruel place.”

Jake laughs loudly, and it brightens your entire world.  “I can always make you another,” he offers. “Though you should probably stop soon.  Don’t wanna be up all night, eh?”

Suddenly, he pauses, and his cheeks redden, as if he’s just realizing that he made terrible innuendo.  “Erm, that is to say uhh…” he stammers.

You choose to let him off the hook and ignore that prime set-up.  Instead, you say, “Have you paid any attention at all to the time I usually come here?  And then number of espresso beans you put in my drinks?  I’ll be fine, English.”

You pause, grinning at him playfully, and continue, “now you.  I have to wonder what you would be like with this much pure caffeine running through your veins.”

You’d say more, but you stop yourself, because just mentioning Jake’s blood is reminding you that you need to feed tonight.  Ugh. Pesky habits.

“Probably bouncing off the walls!” Jake exclaims, giggling in a way that is sinfully cute.  “I actually am very careful with my caffeine intake. Too much makes me very productive and then very sick!  But I make such good coffee it’s almost a shame I can’t partake in it as much as I’d like.  My veins just aren’t as tough as yours, I’m afraid.”

Internally, you wince as he mentions his veins, and hence his blood, again.  You feel a sudden pull towards his body, his blood.  You want it.  You wonder what his tastes like?  Surely it’s better than all the rest.  Coming from someone as attractive as Jake—

Keep internal monologuing, and Jake is gonna leave your ass here. Hal sends to you, likely tired of hearing your thoughts of attraction towards someone who isn’t him.  Of course, he hears your thoughts and sends, Much as I love the gushing of your fluttery whimsical emotions—no wait. I don’t love them at all.  You never used to have this problem before. What the fuck happened to you?

Deciding to ignore Hal again, you instead focus your attention back to Jake.  And the possibility of a relationship with him.  And stupid teenagers that will probably be invoking the wrath of evil spirits in the next couple hours.  Hal’s right.  You have to move this along.  “I think it’d be cute watching you go on a caffeinated tear.  But anyway, you wanted to talk about something?”

Jake’s playful expression turns into a more serious one, and his eyes grow wide as he stammers, “yes, it’s just—Strider—” Jake trails off suspiciously, running a hand through his messy hair.

Jake’s—nervous?  Is your little barista boy nervous?  Fuck. That means he’s probably going to talk about exactly what you were worried he was going to talk about. Which is really stupid to even be thinking about, since you should be listening to Jake, who is still talking to you and—

Shut your fucking brain up or you’re going to miss it! Hal screams at you in large bold letters.

“I really... like you,” Jake says, glancing up at you with a small smile.  “I like being around you.  Um.  I’d like to be around you more.  If you’d like to let me?”

The way he looks at you, so full of hope, how could you possibly tell him no?

Before you can speak, he continues, as if he’s in a rush to get everything out that he’s wanted to say for a while.  “I haven’t felt anything for anyone in a long time you see, and if you don’t feel the same, I’d rather be told now than strung along,” he explains, looking slightly dejected just at the thought.  His voice quiets as he says, “I’m not sure I could take it.”

You feel your non-beating heart pulled by Jake’s words.  Feelings that nobody else could make you feel.  You know it should be way too early to say this, but you almost suspect that you love him.  But if you were ever to hurt Jake, you don’t know if you could take it.

For a moment, you pause, waiting for Hal to say something.  Something snarky.  Some retort.

He’s silent.

Hal’s waiting.  Normally, you would try to figure out why, but you don’t have the time for that right now. Jake is expecting an answer from you.  “Jake,” you finally murmur.  “I do feel the same way.  Everything feels lighter, brighter, when I’m around you. I’d really like to spend more time with you.”

You want to tell Jake more, but you can’t do it here. Not in a public place like this.  There are far too many eyes and ears around for the sensitive sort of thing you want to tell him.

Jake snaps you out of your melancholy by grabbing both your hands.  It’s like the guy never quite learned about personal space.  “You truly mean it?! Can we—tonight perhaps.  I know you’ve got your graveyard shenanigans later, but we could go for a stroll or something.  Admire the Halloween decorations.”

You’re still reeling from the fact that Jake just touched you. Like actually touched your hands together.  “Yeah sure. Let’s go,” you agree, still in somewhat of a stupor.  “You bring a jacket?  It’s a little chilly out tonight.”

Jake gives you an elated smile and admits, “No, I wasn’t planning on being out tonight, but it’ll be fine.  Shouldn’t be too chilly.”

Frowning, you don’t hesitate to remove the jacket you were wearing just for the cool guy ironies and drape it over Jake’s shoulders.  You know that Jake will get cold outside and maybe sick if you’re out for a while, whereas nothing will happen to you.  “You should take this,” you tell him, not giving him time to argue as you walk out the door, holding it open for your cute barista boy.

Jake stares at you in stunned silence for a few seconds, and you wonder what is going through his mind. You hope he isn’t going to change it and decide he doesn’t want to go with you.  You hope you weren’t being too forward by throwing your jacket at him.

He takes all of your worries away when he smiles at you in that adorable way with his teeth peeking slightly out from behind his lips.  “T-thank you!” he sputters, quickly walking through the door and leading you both outside into the night.

As the door closes behind you, you feel that it’s signifying the end of the coffee-shop pining you had for months.  You’re finally going out into the world with Jake by your side.  And no, he’s not your boyfriend yet.  You’re not even close to where you’d like to be in your relationship, but this is the first step into something exciting and new.

You can’t wait to see where the night will bring you.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A song, from me to you! [Click me!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEIeb85DkCs)


	2. A Night on the Town

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "There's so many things I have to say  
> I'll stay up all night to hear about your day  
> We do the best we can in a small town  
> Act like kids in love when the sun goes down"  
> \--"Coffee" by Copeland.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sachi here! We were gonna wait to post this chapter, since LateNiteSlacker is fond of weekly posting, but we decided to spoil you since it's a holiday for us Americans. (Basically I begged her and no one can say no to the puppy eyes!) Technically I'm late, but it still counts!

The stars are twinkling overhead, bright enough to rival the light of the moon. They're reflected perfectly in the ocean underneath, almost like two night skies stacked atop one another. In the distance, there are the sounds of the bustling city celebrating the holiday, but all you can really hear is your own heartbeat pounding in your head.

You're Jake English, and this night is turning into a dream come true!

You're really nervous though—and who wouldn't be with someone like Dirk Strider walking beside them? You've been ogling the guy for months, ever since he first came into the coffee shop. And then you finally were able to string sentences together around him, and you considered that a major accomplishment in itself. He comes every night to see you, and it wasn't until a few nights ago that you thought he might find you as interesting as you find him, and you noticed by accident.

Dirk isn't the kind of guy who says a lot. You've noticed that about him as well. It could potentially put a damper on things because you like to talk _so much_ , but Dirk only doesn't say much with his _mouth_. His body language speaks volumes, and the volumes they speak happened to reach you when you noticed him staring at you. At first, you weren't sure if he really was. You chalked it up to wishful thinking, because how could you possibly be sure when he's always wearing those silly sunglasses of his? But his head is always tilted toward you, and when your line is full and someone else mans the other register, he waits off to the side for you to be able to take his order. He's said it's because no one's coffee is as good as yours, but you couldn't help but wish there was more to it.

And then tonight, eureka! He said he felt the same! You weren't imagining it! You're happy you got the nerve to say something, even if if potentially made you feel like you were going to vomit. Staring Dirk Strider in the face and asking about his feelings was definitely one of the hardest things you've ever had to do. But it was worth it! Here you are, wearing his jacket, walking with him in the starlit night, no one around but the two of you. And sure, you're both being quiet, but you think it's a comfortable silence. Most of the other people in the city are out taking their kids trick or treating, and you're grateful for the solitude. You tilt your head back to observe the stars, various constellations your grandmother taught you running through your head, when you notice Dirk's head is tilted toward you again. You smile at him, deciding to test your little hunch.

“Staring again, eh?” you ask cheekily. He actually _jumps_ beside you, as if he wasn't expecting to get caught. “You do that quite a bit, heh.”

“Sorry,” he blurts out before you can continue.

“No, I mean. Um.” You scratch the back of your head. “I wouldn't have noticed if I wasn't looking in your direction a bit as well.”

It might be your imagination, but you think Dirk moves a little closer to you.

“So, Strider!” you say, lifting your arms so the jacket sleeves will stop covering your hands, “tell me about yourself. I don't know nearly enough! And don't just say you're a cool guy, I know that already.”

He grins and your heart skips a beat. He doesn't do that nearly enough, and you wish he would. Dirk looks so much better when he's smiling.

“Hmmm,” Dirk says thoughtfully, “I have a younger dipshit brother. We both grew up in Texas before coming here.” He stops there, his head tilting toward you again, as if he's trying to decide whether that was too much information to tell you. You have to stifle a laugh because him being nervous is actually _really_ cute. “How about you?”

“Only child,” you say. “But I have my share of 'dipshits' in the family. My cousin John is definitely the bane of my existence when he chooses to be. He calls himself the pranking king.” You shake your head when you hear John's silly little laugh echoing in your thoughts. “But he gets that from his father.”

“How about your parents?” Dirk asks.

“Dead, I'm afraid. Car accident when I was three. Yours?”

“Not around. Pretty much raised my younger bro alone and kick myself every day that he turned into such a shit.”

“I'm sorry to hear it,” you say quietly. “I've had more than enough time to move past my own loss. My grandmother raised me, and she's always been a wicked old gal at everything she's set out to do, including rearing me!” You smile when you think of her. “If I could wish for anything, I think it would be having enough money to pay her back for all she's done.”

“She sounds like a kickass guardian,” Dirk agrees.

“Oh, she is!” You say happily. “She's the person I most look up to!” You stop because you don't want to seem like a grandma's boy, even if that's exactly what you are. You regroup. “She's been ill recently, so she sleeps more than I'm accustomed. And those bloody hospital bills are no joke either.”

Dirk is quiet for a moment, but then he asks, “Is that why you're always working?”

“Yes. Those double shifts are tiring, but they work wonders when it comes time to pay bills. I've not got time to be lazy when there's so much to be done!” You try to smile reassuringly at him, eager to get your mind off these dark topics. “But she's more than worth every hour spent on the time clock.”

“Sounds rough,” he comments. “Is...there any way I can help?”

“Um!” Wow, to say you're surprised would be an understatement. Dirk really must be a one of a kind guy to be so generous! You'd never ask someone for help in this sort of situation though. You appreciate him very much for thinking of you enough to ask. “Just keep coming to the shop, heh. That supports the business and...I, erm. Rather enjoy seeing you.”

You stare pointedly at the ocean beside you, marveling at the way the rippling current distorts the mirror image of the night sky, when you jump in surprise. Something is wrapping around your hand. You look down and practically fall over when you realize it's Dirk's hand enveloping yours. _He's holding your hand_. You look up at him, unable to stop the smile that spreads across your face, your heart bursting into hyper-drive as you link your fingers through his, admiring how they just _fit_ together. His hands are cold, but yours are probably colder. You squeeze his fingers playfully, and you laugh when he squeezes yours right back.

“Enough about all that,” you say, swinging your linked arms happily. “What's this brother of yours like? Aside from your affectionate slurs toward him.”

“Ugh,” Dirk grunts. “Name's Dave. Always wants his way.” He frowns. “Takes my stuff _all_ the time and _never_ stops whining.”

You laugh, both from Dirk's words and the look of distaste on his face. “Goodness. He sounds quite the opposite from Mr. Cool Guy at my Service.”

“ _Completely_ different,” Dirk nods sagely. “He'd drink all your coffee if I ever brought him.”

“Well you should definitely bring him then!” You say. “That'd be great for sales.”

“He's picky as hell,” Dirk disagrees. “Trust me, you don't want him anywhere near you.”

“I'm sure it'd be fine, you worrywart. But we shan't do anything to make you uncomfortable!”

Dirk smiles again, shaking his head at you. His feet stop moving, and with his hold on you, he stops you right along with him. You look up at him questioningly, but he's not looking at you, is staring at the two night skies you were admiring earlier. You can feel he wants to say something,but he's silent, and you decide not to push him just yet. Instead you scoot closer to him and lean your head on his shoulder, admiring the beautiful scenery. His breath catches, barely audible, and you grin to yourself, nuzzling against him.

“This is really nice,” you say softly, and you hope it doesn't sound silly. All the two of you have done is walk around and exchange small talk. But just having him _close_ like this is wonderful, and it's something you only allowed yourself to think about in the past, as you never thought you'd have him next to you like this.

His head tilts against yours. “It is,” he murmurs. You squeeze his hand again and feel his happy sigh exhaling into your hair.

It's quiet again, and there are a thousand things running through your head that you want to tell him—most of them frighteningly sappy. You choose to stay quiet, hoping your close proximity to him is speaking your feelings for you. You're not exactly the best with words, and you feel like anything you say will destroy the mood.

“Jake,” Dirk says softly.

“Hm?”

“I...” He curses slightly when a chiming noise fills the air, breaking your serene little bubble. You lean away to see Dirk reaching for his phone with a scowl on his face. “I gotta go.”

“Wha-” You can't help but tighten your hold on his hand. “Why? It's so early...”

“It's—hard to explain,” Dirk sighs. “Trust me when I say I'd much rather hang out with you, but I can't really take you with me.”

“If you had other plans, you could have said you didn't want to come along with me,” you say dejectedly, dropping his hand. You can tell when you're being brushed off, and you don't care much for being jerked around. Dirk is giving you a pleading look, his phone going off again, which he pointedly ignores.

“Jake, it's not—fuck it's not like that. My job is dangerous. I can't really explain it, just trust me.”

You blink confusedly. “But...I thought you said something about a...graveyard? That's your job? And it's dangerous, you say?” You think for a moment before it clicks. “Eureka! I know what's going on here!”

“You do?” Dirk asks, eyebrows raised.

“You bet your bottom dollar I do! Dirk Strider, grave robbing is _illegal_ and I shan't let you do something so horrible! If you're that strapped for cash, there are various jobs that are hiring!”

He stares at you for a moment, and if you didn't know any better, you'd think you saw his glasses flash red. He flicks them and then he laughs. He's laughing! You're frozen as he moves closer to you, his arms wrapping around you and—he's _hugging_ you! He's hugging you tightly to him and you probably should push him away since he's going to do such an awful thing for money but you tilt into him anyway, deciding you could probably take him down if he decided to silence you.

“Jake, holy fuck,” he breathes, still laughing at you. “I'm not a grave robber. The outlandish things you think of.”

“What are you going to do, then?” You mumble, finally wrapping your arms around him in turn. You won't let him go so easily! You don't believe he'll stay out of trouble! After all, he always orders coffee so _late_ , and that means you've been fueling his deranged habits! Oh, your grandmother will be so ticked if you've been peddling coffee to a criminal—

He sighs, you can feel his breath in your hair, and golly that's a pleasant feeling.

“Gotta go scare some troublemakers off. The ones who mess with things they don't understand on Halloween. It's part of my job to keep the peace between both worlds.” He pulls away to look at you. “They could accidentally summon something much more dangerous than they're intending—“

Your blood runs cold. You know all too well the consequences of faulty summoning. And to let other people deal with it as well...

“Well what are you waiting for!” You ask, grabbing his hand and pulling him along. “Dirk Strider, your dawdling could have a terrible outcome!”

“You really shouldn't come-”

“It's a free country, chum!” You call back. His hand squeezes yours, and you think you can hear him laughing again, but with the rush of wind in your ears, you can't be certain.

The graveyard isn't very far away, merely a few blocks. You get the feeling Dirk can outrun you on those long legs of his, but he stays right beside you, your hands clutched together. As soon as the graveyard comes into view, Dirk steps ahead of you and tilts his head back—is he sniffing the air? He jerks his head to signal which direction to go in, and you stay close to him, looking around yourself warily. Your hair is raising on the back of your neck at the possibility of something bad being here...and you can't help but be curious how Dirk has this job. Something about him has always seemed different, but this takes the cake! No one you've ever met outside of your family has believed in the same things you do, and here Dirk Strider is, saying he has to defend the other world that no one believes in. What exactly is he?

“Shit,” Dirk murmurs, and you're jerked from your stupor. In the distance, you can hear screaming. “Stay here!” he hisses, and then he's off. Wow, is he fast!

You stand still, awkwardly rubbing your arms and hugging Dirk's jacket closer around yourself. You can't sense anything evil in the air, so you think whatever reckless kids are out here haven't managed to invoke anything too troubling. Hopefully Dirk can get to them in time to stop them from causing more trouble.

You look up when you hear the sound of heavy footsteps, and you notice a group of about five teenagers rushing through the graveyard. Hey! You made coffee for a few of them!

“Ghosts, holy shit!” One of them screeches, tugging his friend along faster.

You frown after them and look back in Dirk's direction, worrying your bottom lip. Nothing spiritually evil in the air, but that doesn't mean one of those scared teenagers didn't freak out and whack Dirk against the head with a heavy stick or something. And you still have a lot of questions to ask him! You see no reason to continue standing still, regardless of what Dirk told you to do. He isn't the boss of you, after all.

You move along the graveyard, toward the direction Dirk ran off into. But then—you can feel a presence in the air...a melancholy spirit? Twisting your head around, you change direction, going instead toward the feelings of despair and flickering anger. The closer you get, the stronger the feelings become. You press forward until you can hear quiet sobbing. Alarmed, you run toward the source, your heart clenching when you see an elderly woman propped against one of the tombstones, her head in her arms. She's not exactly solid, her features visible but mostly transparent. You approach her cautiously as to not alarm her, but her head snaps up in your direction regardless.

“Oh, great!” she sniffles, eyeing you suspiciously. “Another one! Here to disturb even more of us?”

“No, ma'am,” you say gently, moving closer. “Why are you crying?”

“Why do you think!” she snaps, the air growing chillier with her anger. “I didn't want to be here! I was resting and—here I am! All because you kids think it's funny to mess around with things that are better left alone!” She warbles miserably, the sound echoing in the night air.

You sit close to her, but not too close. You don't want to impose upon her personal space, and it's important she knows you don't mean to make her uncomfortable. She's still glaring at you, but she doesn't do anything to try and make you move.

“I'm sorry,” you tell her truthfully. “Sometimes people don't understand that messing with otherworldly beings is a bad idea. The thrill of the unknown entices some! And ma'am, if you were resting properly, they wouldn't have been able to summon you. Human spirits pass on if they're truly at peace.”

“Resting properly?” she asks, finally losing the malevolent stare.

You nod. “If you're here as a spirit, it means you weren't laid to rest properly.” She looks as if she's about to start sobbing again. “B-but don't worry!” You hurriedly tack on. “I can help you!”

“How?” she sniffs.

“Well,” you frown, “what's keeping you here? Why don't you want to pass on?”

“So it's my fault, is it?” she hisses at you. You stare calmly back at her. It's not exactly uncommon for stranded spirits to lash out while they gather their thoughts.

“Do you reckon it's just because you're frightened?” you ask her.

She looks at you as though she'd like nothing more than to slap you across the face, but then her expression softens, her transparent body curling in on itself.

“Wouldn't you be?” she asks softly.

“I would,” you say honestly. “It's that unknown factor again. Sometimes it entices you, and sometimes it scares you away. But I think in this case, it would be worth it.”

“What if...I'm not me anymore?” she inquires.

“You will be. Look at you! You don't have a body anymore and you're still yourself!” You smile at her encouragingly. “My grandmother says death is like falling asleep. You can fall asleep and keep getting woken up, and be a cranky customer! But if you fall asleep properly, you'll be refreshed, and ready for the next adventure.” You scoot closer to her. “This isn't the end. It's just another beginning.”

“You really think so?” You're directly beside her now, and she's within your reach, even if you can't really touch her.

“You'll be at peace,” you say, reaching to brush the tears off her face. Your hand seemingly goes through her of course, and there are no tears on your hand when you pull it away, but it still gets her to smile. “Which means no more tears.”

She wipes her tears and shakes her head at you, a grin spreading across her face. She looks at you again before her eyes widen, looking _through_ you. “Oh,” she breathes. “A _light_. I've seen it before but I—“

“Hey,” you murmur. “You're ready. Don't be afraid, you can do it! And if you decide to turn back, well.” You run a hand through your hair awkwardly. “I'll, erm. I'll be right here!”

“Thank you,” she says shakily, standing up and moving past you. You keep an eye on her until she fades, and then her presence disappears entirely.

“I knew you could do it!” You say happily, smiling a bit as you pull yourself to your feet. Now to find Dirk! You turn around to see he's actually very close behind you, a surprised look on his face.

“Jake,” he says, moving toward you. “That was...incredible.”

You find yourself flushing at the sound of Dirk's voice giving you a compliment. You fumble to pull his jacket tighter to give your hands something to do to stop them from hanging uselessly at your sides.

“It was nothing, heh...” You tell him. “You should see what Gramma can do.” Looking back up at him, you find he's directly in front of you, his hand suddenly on your cheek. You sigh, tilting into it, pleased to have him so close.

“Don't sell yourself short, that was amazing. _You're_ amazing.”

Your heart is pounding in your ears. His face is so close to you and he's saying these incredible things to you and—he's leaning closer... You close your eyes, standing on your toes a little to reach him, but he moves right past your lips, his mouth brushing against your ear as he whispers into it.

“Dunno about you, English, but I think a graveyard is a bad place for a date.”

You shiver, opening your eyes slowly to see him grinning at you. You nudge him with your hip and walk around him, leading him back out into the street.

“Who says this is a date?” You ask cheekily. “I'm not feeling very romanced.”

“Tough one to woo, huh?” Dirk hums, grabbing your hand. “That's fine. We've got time.”

“Is your job over already?”

“Yeah. We got there in time for me to see them freaking out over the ghost of an old lady. But you helped her before I could.” He tilts his head toward you so you know he's looking at you.

“About your job...how—how on earth did you acquire such an odd profession?” You inquire.

“Long story,” he says. “But I promise I'll tell you later. It's not exactly...”

“First date small talk?” You finish, and he grins at you, nodding. “I see! Well then I'd certainly like to wait until you're comfortable divulging such information to me.”

“Thanks,” he murmurs. “But Jake, how long have you been able to see and talk to the dead? Most humans can't do that.”

You frown when he says the word “human” like he's not one himself, but decide not to comment on it. At least, not for now. “Since always. My grandmother is a witch, Dirk. It runs in the family.” You adjust her old hat on your head with your free hand, thinking of all the spirits you've seen her help over the years.

“So you've dealt with this sort of thing before?” he asks.

“Oh, always. Gramma offered seances and tarot readings and Ouija board sessions to those who were grieving. More often than not, if there's a living person in need of closure, there's a spirit in dire need as well, and they'll be unable to pass on unless they receive it! Our house has always been full of various spirits, passing through to get her help. I'm not nearly as adept at it as Gramma is, but I can at least talk to them. Sometimes it helps.”

You continue to babble for a while, probably longer than you need to. Dirk listens to every word you say, laughing at some and shaking his head at others. The two of you walk down the street, through a neighborhood where the houses are decked out for Halloween. You pass children with bags of candy, giggling and yelling after each other that they want to trade. You pass parents jogging to keep up with their children, giving you and Dirk breathless smiles as they pass.

It starts getting colder, and you're seeing less and less people out. You have no idea what time it is, but you know it's getting late. Normally you'd be up for staying out a lot longer, but you worked a double shift today, and even the excitement of Dirk's hand holding yours can't stop the yawn from leaking out.

“Tired?” Dirk asks. You nod, leaning against him as your legs carry you.

“Long day,” you mumble.

“C'mon,” Dirk says, tugging you along. “I'll walk you home. Where do you live?”

You sleepily give him your address, and he leads you into your own familiar neighborhood, your grandmother's whimsical doodads chiming and swirling in the wind as you approach her house. You yawn again, stopping to face him as he accompanies you to the gate.

“I had a great time with you tonight, Dirk,” you say with a smile. “I'd like very much to do it again soon.”

“Yeah,” Dirk agrees. He cups your cheek again, pulling your face close to his. “Jake...”

“Dirk,” you breathe, closing your eyes again. When nothing happens, you frown at him. “Dirk Strider, if you don't kiss me this instant, I'll be sorely tempted to kick you.”

He chuckles, the sound music to your ears as he leans in all the way, brushing his lips with yours. You hum, pulling him closer to you, following his lead as his mouth moves, his lips so soft and perfect. This simple kiss is already more than you ever thought you'd accomplish, neither of you doing anything to deepen it—at least not yet. Your hands move into his meticulously crafted hair, running through it as you playfully nip his lip, enjoying the sound it draws out of him. But then it's his turn to tease you, and when he licks into your mouth with a quiet sigh, you think you surely must be dead.

His tongue swirls around yours, his hands holding you in place, and _oh_. You're so infatuated with him. Your world is spinning rapidly on an entirely new axis, centered around Dirk. Your hands clench in his hair, and he makes a slight growling noise that only further fans the flames spreading in your body. Still, you have to pull away. As wonderful as this is, you can't continue snogging him outside your grandmother's house all night. There's always next time.

Both of you are breathing heavily, Dirk's hands still holding your face as he tilts his forehead against yours.

“ _Jake_ ,” he groans quietly, his breath mingling with yours between your faces.

“I'll see you soon?” You inquire, petting through his hair. It's much softer than you would have thought, what with him putting so much product in it.

“Fuck yes you will. You'll see me tomorrow.”

You laugh at him, pulling him into a much gentler kiss, just admiring the way his mouth fits over yours. Finally, you pull away, turning to go inside.

“Oh, wait!” You say. “Dirk, I still have your jacket.”

“Keep it. I'll come get it tomorrow. Not like I really need it.”

You hug it around yourself, happy to have an excuse to keep it on. It's comfortable, but more importantly, it smells like him.

“Alright then,” you smile. “Goodnight, Dirk.”

“Goodnight.”

He stands there, watching as you go inside, but when you look through the window of the door, he's already gone. You lean against the door, hugging his jacket around yourself and smelling it like a lovesick fool when you notice your grandmother is still awake, sitting in her armchair as she watches something on television. She shakes her head at you, but doesn't comment.

You rush upstairs, grateful that she can't see the wide smile on your face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A [song.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xzLL2brvI4c)


	3. To Love a Human

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LateNiteSlacker here! First of all, congrats on making it to 2015! You did it! Set some goals for yourself. The more ambiguous and lofty, and the less they're able to be interpreted by anyone else, the better! ;D
> 
> But in all seriousness, hope you have a great year! Let Sachi and I help you start it off right with chapter 3!

Jake English is definitely a thing.  A delightful thing that is happening.

A human thing.

You are Dirk Strider, and you are finding it hard to concentrate on anything else.  You can’t stop thinking about Jake.  How he helped that ghost cross over to the other side.  How he kissed you.

How he’s a human.

Jake fucking human English has your soul, and it’s not goddamned fair.

Why does he have to be a human?  Another vampire, a werewolf, an incubus.  Even a fucking first guardian of the universe would be better!

But no.  Jake English is a human.  An adorable human with an infectious smile and laughter that makes your heart want to melt.

Dave, your annoying as shit younger bro, asked you once a long time ago what the big deal was.  Why did it matter if a vampire wanted a human?  Wouldn’t it be a win-win sort of thing?

No.  You’d explained to him that it’s lose-lose.

Because, as a vampire, you want nothing more than to protect your mate.  But if that mate happens to be a human, then you want nothing more than kill them.

Because being a vampire has pretty big baggage.  Baggage that goes by the term “blood lust.”

You unwittingly demonstrated your point fifty years ago.  Dave never questioned you about it again.

Sign up to be a fucking first grade teacher, because you’re the best at educating by example. Hal’s red letters flash brightly across your vision as you walk through the streets.

“Hal,” you murmur tiredly back to him.

You’ll never make that mistake again.  Nope.  Oh wait.  You just did.  Hope you have another pair of glasses ready.  Maybe you’ll actually spring for something designer and cool since you love this one so much.  Oh wait.  Maybe you could put him in a pair of pants since you’ve always wanted to get into his.  And the next one can be a shirt.  You’ll have a fucking dead boyfriend **wardrobe** by the time you’re done.

You would argue back, but it’s been this way for months.  Ever since you laid eyes on Jake English, Hal noticed how much you liked to stare at him from behind your shades.  Unfortunately for you, from his vantage point in front of your eyes, Hal can see everything you can see.  Hal noticed before you did when you fell in love.

Yes, you think it’s true.  You’re in love with Jake English.  And you barely know him.

Ok, maybe the last part isn’t true.  You’ve had months to talk to him at the coffee shop.  You know a few things about him.

You know that he has absolutely no taste in movies.  He literally loves anything he watches.  You know that he lives with his grandmother, who he loves dearly and would gladly sacrifice his life for.  You know that he washes his hair with the cheapest shampoos in the stores because he’s saving money for something.  But you really don’t care what he washes with because you love the way the coconut, apples, and strawberries ‘n cream scented shampoos mix with his naturally intoxicating scent.

You love the way Jake English smells.  You loved the way he felt when you kissed him.

If he would let you, you have a feeling you would love the way he _tastes_.

Spare me the fucking details _please._ Hal sends. How about this. Rather than whine and moan about how much you want him for the next few decades until your precious human Jake English passes away, why don’t you actually do something about it?

“You know why,” you growl at him.

Can’t have history repeat itself?  Don’t worry. Apparently Jake is special enough that he’ll be just fine.

“Will you ever stop being a jealous smarmy asshole?” you grumble to him.

_Never._ he says, but he doesn’t send you anything for the rest of the night.

You walk through the city streets until it gets late.  And by late, you mean early.  The sun is about to rise, and you know that you’d better get back to your place before that happens.  The sun doesn’t exactly mix with your skin very well.

Tomorrow, you decide, you’ll tell Jake English how you feel.  Tomorrow you’ll walk into that coffee shop, charm him off his feet, and take him to places he’s never been before.

*          *          *

Tomorrow comes.

You don’t know what the fuck you’re doing.

Beneath your cool exterior, you’re a complete nervous wreck.  You actually notice your hand trembling a bit as you hold the special coffee that Jake made for you.  He even put a little heart on the cup next to your name.

Damn it.  Why does he have to be so fucking adorable?

“ _Because he wants you, you idiot._ ” Hal sends to you, stating the obvious.  “ _He wants to get into your fucking bed and do the **do** with you._ ”

“ _He hasn’t for the past month,_ ” you think back.  “ _He hasn’t even wanted to come over to my place.  Why would he suddenly want that now?_ ”

Oh yeah.

It might not actually be _tomorrow_ either.

It might actually be _one month_ since that day you kissed Jake.

“ _It HAS been a month, you lovesick idiot,_ ” Hal grumbles.  “ _Why do you have these terrible monologues with yourself all the time?_ ”

“ _Why do you keep responding to them?_ ” you think back to him.

Hal falls silent, which is a small blessing in itself.

The coffee shop line dies down, and Jake finally has a chance to fucking prance over to you.  He’s like an angel floating to you on a cloud, bearing you gifts of coffee to help quench your horrible vampiric thirst that you still haven’t fed.

A thirst that Jake still doesn’t know about.

Yep.  A month into dating this lovely human and he still doesn’t know you aren’t like him.  He knows you stay out all night, which he finds comical.  But though you know he _wants_ you during the day, he doesn’t want you enough to actually _call_ for you.  And thank fuck for that, because the less time you have to spend out in the daylight the better.

Jake has remained content to see you every night at the coffee shop.  And you mean literally _every night_.  Jake works even on the nights he isn’t scheduled, picking up as many shifts as he can.  He must have something he really wants to buy, or be in a hell of a lot of debt, because when you asked him about it, he simply smiled and told you he could use the money.

He never loses his cheer though, and that you find both remarkable and endearing.  Every day, he greets you with a sunny smile and a “Jake Special” coffee made just for you.

You trace your thumb over the little heart he drew next to your name on the cup.  He’s been adding one there for exactly five days.  The first time, you thought he was just being cute, but now you’re starting to wonder if it’s something more.  Is he trying to tell you something with this simple little heart, drawn in a black sharpie marker?

Or are you just imagining things?  Creating fictitious thoughts and ideas where none exist?

While you remain deep in thought, Jake comes out from behind the counter and tugs at your waist until you shift and hug him loosely.  He’s already put away his apron and thrown on the jacket you let him borrow forever ago.  You love it when he wears your clothes. “What’s with the serious look, Strider?  I dare say I’ve seen possums with a more cheery disposition!”

“Possums?  You’ve got all the creatures of the world and you went with possums?” You ask him flatly.

“Have you ever seen a particularly cheerful possum?” he challenges, eying you pointedly.

“Can’t say I have,” you admit.

“There you have it!” he says, as if that proves his point perfectly.  “Possums.”

“You gonna let me take you out on a date, or are we gonna stand here arguing about the local wildlife all night?” You finally ask.

“Let’s go!” Jake says, stretching his arms out.  “I’ve been here 60 hours already this week!  It’s high time for a break!”

“I think this coffee shop would go out of business without you working,” you comment, throwing your arm over his shoulder and leading him out into the night.

“My cousin works here too,” Jake remarks.  “I do believe he could pick up the proverbial slack! Anyway, do you have any interesting targets tonight?”

Oh yeah.  Jake might have been helping you with your targets the past month too.

Anytime there are ghosts involved, he is remarkably adept at peacefully wooing them to the other side.  You’ve watched on the sidelines in awe as Jake coerces them in that special way of his, helping guide spirit after spirit to peace.  It’s a beautiful talent that you’ve never seen in a human, or anyone, before.

If the targets are a little too vicious, you let Dave handle them.  You know that Jake would never agree to hang back, and you don’t want to put him in too much danger.  Dave bitches and moans every time, but he can deal with it.

For the smaller targets, like the one you have tonight, you are actually happy to bring Jake along.  It’s nice having him by your side.  You kind of hope that this can be a thing that happens more often.  That someday you and Jake will be able to fight off those more vicious demons together the way you and Dave can.

“Just some teenagers causing problems in the graveyard again.  We’ve got a little time to get there.  It’s usually just the weak spirits that respond to their calls,” you murmur, walking languidly with Jake.  You have no destination in mind, and that suits you just fine.

“Another spirit for me?” Jake asks, his eyes sparkling with what you would swear is happiness.  You think that helping these spirits in their journeys to self-peace makes your boyfriend happy.  And if it makes _him_ happy, it makes _you_ happy.

Yes, you are a lovesick idiot.

Jake takes you on a little detour by the seaside.  It’s become a little habit of yours to hit the same spot where you shared your first kiss together every now and then.  As you stand there overlooking the sea, Jake leans his head on your shoulder.  You pull him close with one arm and think about how small you really are in the grand scheme of things.

The ocean is so vast, like the chaos that still exists in the world.  You and Dave do what you can to keep the city safe, but there’s no way you can watch over the entire realm.  And there’s no way you can possibly handle Derse.  That’s why you have backup there.  But that’s a sore spot and you don’t feel like thinking about that right now.

When Jake rests his head on your shoulder, it reminds you of what you were all too eager to declare to Cronus a month ago.  You told him Jake was yours.  Even though it’s not true, Cronus won’t know the difference.  He’ll no doubt spread that around as he whines to the entire demonic population.  It’ll circle back to Derse.

You sigh about as you think about what that _really_ means.  It’s more than what Jake probably thinks it is.

Declaring that a human is _yours_ is a big deal.  It’s a possessive ownership, and with it comes a responsibility to protect.

Love usually isn’t part of it.  You’ve known several demons who only use their humans, but you don’t want it to be that way.

You don’t want a pet human.  You want Jake to be _yours_ and you want to be _his._

You want to _bond_ with this human.

You want to _belong_ to Jake.

You want to share each other’s _very souls_.

You could see how some might find that intimidating.  But you aren’t about to take advantage of Jake like other demons with their humans.  You won’t treat him like some object you own.  Another flashy gadget of the day.

But you have to face the facts.

Jake isn’t even your boyfriend yet.

That’s right, you’ve been kissing him and making fucking soft-core porn with him on a nightly basis, but he has yet to say you’re his boyfriend.  Then again, you haven’t exactly asked him.

But what do you say to him?  You’ve barely known each other.  You’ve only talked a few months.  What do you even say?  Be my boyfriend?  You open your mouth and pray for some smooth-talking to come out.

“Let’s do this more often.  Going out together.  Being this close,” are the words that actually come out of your mouth.  And wow what the fuck. How was that anywhere near smooth?

Jake doesn’t seem to mind, and he gives you a big goofy grin before leaning in and kissing you on the jaw.  You kiss him back on the cheek, then the corner of the mouth.

You only hesitate for a moment before lightly brushing your lips against his.  It’s not like this is new. You’ve been kissing him for the better part of a month now.

Jake responds to you by smiling into the kiss and tugging you closer.  He wraps his arms around you and _fuck_ you could get lost in this man.  You already have.  You’re like Little Red Riding Hood in the woods and Jake’s the wolf that you’ll gladly let consume your soul.

Except it’s actually the other way around, isn’t it?  Jake’s the innocent little coffee-shop barista that you, the hungry predator, picked up.  You’ve been the one wooing him night by night, lulling him closer to you, lowering his securities until he’s perfectly content being this close to you.  Until he’s the one pulling _you_ closer and begging for more.

“I’d like that.  I’ll take whatever time you’ve got,” Jake finally replies, giving you a goofy grin before pulling you into another deeper kiss.  He runs his tongue along your lower lip in a silent plea for more, and when you part your lips he is eager to deepen your kiss.

This is new.  Your kisses have always been fairly chaste before this, but you find that you don’t care.  You _like_ having Jake’s tongue in your mouth.  You’re excited as fuck that he wants it there.

You’ve never been more thankful that your fangs aren’t out prominently on display unless you want them to be.  Jake’s tongue should be safe inside your mouth, and you are so grateful for that.  You love the way his tongue slides along yours, licking teasingly and then deeply inside.

“Goodness Strider,” Jake gasps against your mouth with surprise and pleasure.  You feel his heartbeat quicken and see the flush that rises to his cheeks.  You love every bit of him.  “You’re so bloody beautiful.”

You’re more than willing to let Jake pull you in, your lips meeting again and again.  Kissing Jake makes you feel truly alive. You’re refreshed, as if a piece of your lost innocence has come back.  As soon as you think the thoughts, you reflexively brace for the red text to bombard your shades, but it never comes.

Jake pulls back and looks up at you through heavy lids, stroking your cheeks and smoothing his hands up into your hair.  He’s messing it up a little but fuck does it feel _nice_.  You love feeling those fingers on your skin and his hands that still smell faintly like the coffee they’ve been preparing all night. “No, English. You’re the attractive one.”

You feel yourself being drawn to Jake again.  Wanting to taste more of this man than just his lips.  Wanting to have him, to _drink him up_ , and truly make him **_yours_.**

You shiver as Jake slides along your lips and tongue again.  You want nothing more than to kiss him all night.  To taste him. To have the warmth of his tongue in your mouth.

His blood down your throat.

“Nnnh!” you gasp, pulling back sharply and forcing Jake back an arm’s length from you while you fight back the urge that’s suddenly pulling at you overwhelmingly.  Being this close to Jake is reminding you of just how long it’s been since you really drank anything.  Coffee only quells your thirst temporarily, and you’re starting to need something more substantial.

Unfortunately, Jake doesn’t know about your inward struggles.  He looks crestfallen and hurt. His voice is quiet as he says, “I—hope I didn’t step on any toes I just—”

His voice breaks off as he offers you a shaky grin.  “I’m sorry Dirk.  I think um.  That I should go—I’ll see you.” He doesn’t say any more before breaking away from your grasp and taking off into the night.

Fuck!  That is not what you wanted to happen.  Way to be smooth.

Why did this have to happen _now_?  You scold yourself for not feeding before seeing Jake.  That’s something you really should have taken care of before you visited him tonight.  And every night.  But you never really thought that this could be a thing.  That your cute little barista boy would truly want you back as much as you want him.  And now because of your foolishness you’re about to lose him.

Fuck that.  You’ve got to make things right.  You’ve got to do it NOW.

“Jake!” You exclaim, running after him and catching up easily.  You catch him from behind and pull him into a tight hug.  “I’m so sorry I did that.  I’m just—”

You pause.  You’re just what?  Quick.  You need a quick excuse!

“—scared of commitment,” you respond lamely.  “But I know I’ve never wanted anyone by my side more than you.  Please don’t run away, Jake.”

“Scared of commitment?” Jake asks, turning to give you a confused stare.  “That’s the last fear I would’ve pegged you to have.”

Silence envelops you both for a few seconds, and you wait for what seems an eternity, looking into Jake’s emerald eyes and hearing the fast beating of his heart.

Finally, he sighs, “Come here you great oaf.”  He pulls you into a comforting embrace, threading his hands through your hair.

For a second, you feel elation.  As if you’ve solved the most complex code ever.

And then that second passes.  Jake, not realizing what he’s dealing with, pulls your face into the crook of his neck, despite your awkward height difference.

“Just calm down,” he croons to you gently.  “Let’s just both calm down.”

But he doesn’t realize that you _can’t_ calm down right now.  You’re a hungry vampire and he’s just put your face in the worst place possible.  Your breath catches in your throat because FUCK you can smell the alluring scent of Jake’s blood beneath his skin and feel the wild pulsing of his heart, kicking into overdrive from nerves and adrenaline.

You feel your twin teeth lengthening of their own volition, the sharp points digging into your lower lip.  “C-can’t do that Jake—” you respond shakily.  “I—hnnn—”

You find yourself licking Jake’s neck, ready to bite into the warm flesh of this far too attractive man.  You can’t stay like this.  You can only fight what you are for so long, but if you pull away again, Jake might think you don’t want him.

Jake, naturally, takes it the wrong way.  You feel his heartbeat quicken further and the warmth spreading through his body.  You get the feeling he _likes_ you licking him.  “Dirk—” he sighs, his voice breathier than usual.  Gently, he tugs you closer.

It’s too much.

Whimpering, you feel your teeth digging into your own lip deep and hard enough to draw blood.

Fuck, Jake just pulled you closer.

Fuck fuck fuck…

You don’t want to scare him away, but you can’t stop your instincts.  And when your body is already screaming at you for blood—

“J-Jake,” you murmur shakily, trying to warn him, but you don’t even know what you’re trying to tell him. “I’m—”

You shudder as you try to keep it together.

You fail miserably.

Before you can stop yourself, your tongue is on Jake’s neck again, and your teeth are touching the tender skin of his neck…

“Nnn!” You gasp, quickly and roughly pushing him away, feeling your vampire instincts receding just a bit with the distance.  But your head is still swimming, and your body is still screaming at you to _bite him_.

“Dirk,” Jake murmurs, a very hurt expression on his face.  He looks like he wants to run away again, but for some reason he stays. There’s a fierce look in his eyes as he demands, “What in the blazes is going on with you?!  You kiss me and then you push me away.  You lick me like you want to fuck me and then you push me away!  I’ve had it Strider!  Tell me what’s going on. Talk to me.”

You’re at an impasse.  You could tell him what just happened. You could come clean with him.  

You could tell him what you are.

Or you could just keep this all under wraps. You could keep shoving him away when you’re stupid enough to see him before feeding.  It would hurt him, but it would keep him _safe_.  Not knowing about you, and about your kind, is the safest option for him. Looking at the adorable boy in your arms, clinging to you, the latter is so very tempting.

You don’t want him to get hurt because _you_ pulled him into something terrible.  You would truly hate yourself if anything were to happen to him.  If Jake were to die too--

“Jake,” you begin but pause again because _fuck_ words are hard with your crush in your arms.  Gently you lean in and kiss him on the lips.  It’s all you dare to do.  Then you pull away quickly and keep him at arm’s length from you.  “I really like you Jake.  Really _really_ like you.  But…”

You shouldn’t have said that last word and let it trail like that.  The hurt expression Jake gives you makes _you_ hurt too.  Probably worse than him.  “Dirk, if-if you don’t like me the way I like you, can you… at least stop k-kissing me?”

You hear the sadness in Jake’s voice and curse yourself again.  “That’s not it,” you insist.  “I like you a lot, Jake.  I want to be with you.  Live with you. Do everything with you.”

It’s somehow a lot harder to articulate what you want to say with Jake staring at you with that agonized expression on his face, but like hell if you aren’t going to try!  

“I said that because I’m bad boyfriend material.  I’m,” you pause.  “—not good for you, Jake.”

“So what then?!”’ he exclaims, angrily pushing you away. “T-tell me things about how great I am and kiss me and stick around to—to what?!  SLEEP with me?!  Lead me on?!  But you’re not in this for anything other than yourself! You’ve already heard me tell you h-how much I—”

Jake trails off, but you can guess what he was going to say. Instead, he rubs away a stray tear from under his glasses.  “You fear commitment right?  Then why are you even here?  Do you LIKE jerking me around?!!”

Oh shit.  You’re just digging yourself into a deeper hole and sweet little barista boy is absolutely right.  You’re jerking him around with these wimpy half-assed answers.  Either you have to tell Jake the truth and risk being exposed, forcing yourself to move away forever—

—or you could lie to him.  You could tell him you don’t actually care about him.  You could push him away to keep him safe.

“Jake, I don’t—” you start to say.  Because it’s the right thing to do.

Lie to him.

Tell him you don’t care about him.

Tell him you don’t actually love him.

But you can’t.

“—I don’t want to hide things from you anymore,” you finish instead.  “Jake I know I’ve barely known you, but I love you.”

You don’t get the reaction you were hoping for.  Instead, Jake freezes up and stares at you, completely at a loss for words.  Then he clenches his fists.  “Then why are you being so CRUEL to me Dirk?!”  He asks, sniffling angrily.

And those other things you can’t do?  Those things you weren’t going to tell him to keep him safe?  Looks like you’ll have to tell him that too.

You sigh and close your eyes for a moment, sensing for other presences around.  You don’t feel any.  It’s just you, Jake, and the wide ocean.  It’s now or never.

Slowly, hesitantly, you reach up for your shades.  Jake has never seen your eyes, your single most giveaway sign of how inhuman you are.

“Jake, I have to tell you something,” you begin gravely.  “And if you hate me and never want to see me again after this, I’ll understand. But I can’t hide this from you anymore. You’re too important to me.”

Slowly, you slip off your shades, revealing your orange eyes to the man you love.

“I’m not human, Jake.”

Jake’s eyes widen, and slowly, he reaches up and cups your cheeks with his hands, splaying his fingers against your skin.  “Dirk, you—,” he breathes, his words trailing off.

You brace yourself.  You’ve done it now.  If Jake accepts you, life could be beautiful, but if he hates you—hates _what you are_ —you might have to leave him forever.  It would be simple to stop frequenting that coffee shop where he spends pretty much his whole life.  It would hurt you like fuck, but it’d be possible.

You might never see Jake again.

Jake opens his mouth again, and his brow furrows as his expression turns to one of anger.  He balls his hands into fists and pounds at your chest.  “—you stupid STUPID MAN!”

You don’t say anything, because you honestly have no idea how to take that.  Was that a good response?  You don’t think so?

He looks at you with fury behind his emerald eyes.  “THIS is what you were hiding from me?  THIS is why you were yanking me around like a dog on a leash?!”

When you don’t say anything again, he sighs at you with exasperation.  He continues and his voice is filled with barely contained rage, “I know _all about_ your world!”

Now you’re the one at a loss for words.  “You do?” you ask lamely.

“Of course I do!  I’m not stupid enough to think that we’re alone in the universe!” he shouts at you angrily.  “I’ve helped you with countless exorcisms this past month! You’ve SEEN me do it! So you’re some kind of demon.  Why the blazes should that matter?!  It doesn’t mean I like you any less!”

Now _you_ feel like the lame one, because how could you have misjudged Jake so much?  Are you really such a glutton for self-pity and loathing that you assumed Jake wouldn’t understand?  Wouldn’t still like you?

Yes.  You are.  And that’s exactly what happened.

While you’re being delightfully internally retrospective, Jake continues his tirade.  “I don’t give a flying fuck if you’re a demon!  It doesn’t mean I want to be with you any less, Strider! It doesn’t mean I wouldn’t be your—”

Finally, he stops, ending his rant abruptly.  When you look into his eyes and gauge his expression, you know exactly what he was trying to tell you.

Boyfriend.  That was the word he wanted to say.  But he’s waiting for you to say it first.  You realize suddenly what an idiot you’ve been this whole time.

Jake was always waiting for you to ask.

You realize you’re playing a dangerous game, but it makes your heart want to leap.

Carefully, you collect his hands in your own and look at him meaningfully.  There are a thousand things you could say to him right now.  Things you want to tell him. Things you want to ask him.  But you’ve only got one shot to pick the right thing.

“Jake,” you begin, hoping beyond all hope that you say the right thing.  “I’m sorry I misjudged you.  I assumed you wouldn’t understand.  Demons aren’t exactly well received in most polite society.  Most humans wouldn’t even consider having a demon boyfriend.”

And finally, _finally_ Jake’s angry expression cracks and shifts into a small smile.  He laughs softly and pulls you into a hug.  “I’m sure you’ve realized I’m quite a bit removed from polite society.  And I don’t give a damn what other people think about having a demon boyfriend.  It’s something I wouldn’t mind… if you wouldn’t mind.”

You melt against him and whisper fiercely, “I wanna be your boyfriend. I’ve wanted that for so long but I was afraid you wouldn’t want me once you found out.”

“And I’ve been waiting far too long to hear you say that,” Jake responds, making your breath catch and your heart threaten to beat.  He looks up at you and with a twinkle of mischief in his eye says, “Dirk, be my demon boyfriend?”

“Be my human,” is what you instinctively murmur back to him, wrapping your arms around him and pulling him into a tight hug.

Jake reciprocates, embracing you tightly and kissing you over and over.  Your lips meet sloppily and your tongues slide along each other’s fervently because you want him.  You _need_ him.

And Jake wants you.  Jake _wants_ you!

After all this time, you finally have a boyfriend.

You slide your hands lower, cupping his primo choice ass, and he gasps, pulling you closer.  You could be mistaken, but you’re pretty sure he pushes his arousal against yours on purpose, and _fuck_ does it feel good.  Jake is your everything.

And he’s yours.  Jake’s _yours_.

He rests his head on your shoulder, making tiny incredibly hot sounds as your dicks touch through your clothes.  You need to have him.  You need to be filled with him.  To have him inside you.  His body.  His blood.

You want him.

_You want him._

**_You want him._ **

Your tongue is on Jake’s neck again, and before you can stop yourself, your teeth are already pricking Jake’s tender skin, drawing a few small drops of blood.  You can’t help licking them up hungrily.

Jake instantly clenches your hair tightly.  “Aahh… D-Dirk….” he murmurs, the words slipping out of his mouth as he pulls you even closer.

You know that you shouldn’t be doing this to this innocent little barista boy, but you can’t stop yourself anymore.  Jake’s practically pleading for you to continue.  And even though you know it’s a side effect of a vampire’s bite, you can’t help pretending that Jake actually wants this.

You sigh and begin lightly sucking on Jake’s neck, sating your thirst with some of the most delicious blood you’ve tasted in a long time.  Jake must have a kind and pure heart to produce a taste this sweet.  You hold Jake closely and continue pretending that those pleased sounds coming from him are intentional.

Jake couldn’t possibly actually enjoy being bitten and bled, could he?

But when you wrap your arms around Jake, he makes what is unmistakably a pleased sound, moaning for you again.  “Nnn… Dirk…” You feel the fire of desire burning through his body as he gasps a little and tilts his head aside, allowing you more access.

You moan softly because—fuck—Jake tastes so good.  You shouldn’t be surprised, since you usually feed on the bottom of the barrel of society.  Typically, you choose the sort of people who you and the rest of the world won’t miss if you feed on them a little too much.  Not that you would.

You’ve only made that mistake once.

But Jake is completely different than those people.  He’s different than most people.  Jake is filled with sweetness, warmth, and love.

…wait, love?  Fuck.

You’re still a little thirsty but you have to stop.  You shudder as you force yourself to stop taking Jake’s blood.  Carefully, you lick the wounds on Jake’s neck closed and, nuzzle your nose into the boy’s neck, forcing your teeth to recede back into your mouth.

As your senses come back to you, you realize how badly you just screwed up.  

You just bit Jake.

You fucking _bit him_ right after he decided being boyfriends with a demon was kosher.

It took you two whole minutes to completely betray his trust, but there’s no going back now.  You wouldn’t even think about taking his memories from him, making him gently forget about the last few minutes like you do to the people you feed from every day.  You couldn’t do that to Jake.  Instead, you fumble for an apology.

“Fuck Jake… fuck, I’m so sorry,” you murmur even though you know that nothing can fix what you just did.

“Sorry for what?” Jake sighs and tilts his head to kiss your hair while his hands trail down to rub your back.  “What’s the matter?”

You’re stunned because _what?!_ Did Jake not notice you biting him and drinking his blood?

What the actual fuck?

When you look into his clear green eyes, you don’t see any residual haze from your bite.  Jake’s in his own mind, making his own decisions that are unclouded by the lull of your kind.  Could it be that he doesn’t care? That he actually doesn’t mind you feeding from him?  That he actually _likes_ it?

No, you can’t hope for that.

Jake’s expression grows concerned when you fail to respond.  “Really, is something the matter?”

“Jake, I just bit you,” you admit bluntly.

“Yes, I know,” Jake says.  “And it felt downright fantastic.”

“You don’t get it!” you growl at him. “I’m not just a random demon. I’m a vampire.”

“Oh,” Jake replies, though he doesn’t seem to care. “That’s informative.”

“This isn’t a fucking information session!” You groan lowly.  Squeezing him a little tighter, you regard him very seriously. “I was hungry and I just fed from you.”

“Does it look like I care?” Jake asks, then he chuckles when he sees your shocked expression. “My cousin John has a good friend who is a vampire.  She’s the bees knees!  I hear she feeds from her girlfriend all the time and they seem to be getting along fine and dandy.  Just don’t kill me and everything will be all right.”

You hear that?  Solid advice. Hal sends, the flash of red text finally pinging across your vision in your shades.  You were wondering how long it would take him to butt in. Let’s see if you can follow it this time.

You ignore Hal because his banter is nothing new, but this relationship with Jake is very new.  You give the human your attention, carefully placing your hands on his cheeks and kissing his forehead.  “Jake, are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

“Dirk, I can’t read your mind, so I don’t know what you think I’m saying,” Jake says, giving you an easy smile. The light dusting of a flush across his cheeks is the only indication that he’s nervous at all. “But what I _am_ saying is that I want you to be my vampire demon boyfriend.  And I want it because I lo—”

Suddenly a terrible sound fills the air, stopping Jake in his tracks.  You swear at god, fate, and everything that might have had a hand in making your cell phone go off _right now_.  You check it and sigh, “looks like I’ve gotta get to the graveyard pronto.  Those teenagers didn’t learn their lesson last month.  They’ve summoned demons again.”

You turn to Jake to apologize, but he doesn’t look upset at all.  On the contrary, he looks positively _excited_.  “This should be a great exercise of the old noggin!” He exclaims, and you honestly have no idea what he’s referring to.

Rather than clarify, you nod and pull him along.  Teenagers couldn’t have summoned anything stronger than a minor nuisance of a demon that probably just wants to get back to Derse anyway.  Jake should be safe.

Together, you jog with him to the graveyard.  You quietly assess the situation and murmur, “there’s a few of them. Maybe three.  It’s nothing we shouldn’t be able to handle.”

“Right-o!” Jake agrees chipperly, and again you have no idea what he is agreeing to.  “I’ll help one of them back, and we can meet back here to tackle the last together!”

You smile at him and silently hope he never loses his unique brand of enthusiasm.  “All right.  Just shout if you’re having any problems.  I’ll find you.”

You kiss him and watch him take off.  Realizing that the sooner you finish this the sooner you can get back to kissing him, you head for the other weak presence.  It doesn’t take you long to find him.  The horned demon sporting both vivid red and blue energy auras looks positively peeved to be here.  “Sollux?  Why the fuck did _you_ respond to a stupid teenager’s call?”

“Does it _look_ like I wanted to respond?” Sollux answers, his voice still carrying the same lisp he’s always had.  “I was in the middle of coding something important when the portal literally opened up under my chair.   _Under my fucking chair¸ Dirk!_ ”

You grin at him and respond, mocking his lisp just for the hell of it, “sounds positively pleasant.”

“It totally wasn’t,” he says, glowering at you.  “And cut it out.  Imitating my lisp wasn’t funny the first five hundred times you did it.”

“I beg to disagree,” you say, imitating his lisp one last time before dropping it.  Instead, you shift to other subjects. “So if you’re so eager to get back to Derse, make yourself a portal back and we can both get back to more important things.”

“Since when do you ever have anything fucking important going on?” Sollux says, and you can hear the annoyance behind his voice.

Normally you’d dick Sollux around for at least another half an hour, because it’s fun as hell to get a rise out of him.  But tonight, you’ve got a different agenda.  Tonight you’ve got a brand spankin’ new boyfriend to kiss and make out with until he falls asleep.

“My _boyfriend_ ,” you tell him smugly.  “A cutie by the name of Jake English.  So if you’d kindly fuck off back to Derse, I can get back to him.”

For the second time this evening, you don’t get the response you were aiming for.  You thought Sollux would roll his eyes, or maybe even be mildly upset for bothering to ask.  But instead, you get something completely different.

Sollux looks scared.  “Did… did you say _Jake_ _English_?”

“Yeah,” you agree slowly.  “Why?”

“This is bad.  This is _really bad_ , Dirk!” Sollux mutters, looking more worked up than you think you’ve ever seen him.

“You’re still not telling me why,” you growl, growing tired of his antics.  It’s not really that you’re that annoyed with him, it’s that you’re worried.  Sollux was fine until you mentioned Jake’s name.  “How do you know Jake?”

He shakes his head.  “There’s not a demon in Derse that hasn’t heard of Jake English.”

Suddenly you’re worried.  VERY worried.  “Why? Don’t fuck around with me, Sollux.  Tell me _why_?”

But Sollux only shakes his head again.  “I don’t have time to tell you.  Your little boyfriend is in danger and we’ve gotta go now.”

You sniff out the air, catching Jake’s scent, and start heading for it.  “Tell me something at least!  Why’s he in so much danger?”

“Because _he’s_ here,” the other demon answers, his voice falling into a hushed tone.

You are getting so sick of asking questions.  “And who is _he_?”

“The self-proclaimed Lord of the Demons,” Sollux says, his voice lowering to a tone that tells you he’s almost afraid to say the name.  “Caliborn.”

 


	4. Past Demons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pay close attention  
> Don't listen to me from now  
> George'll be flying this one  
> And it's anyone's guess how he does this  
> Is the right turn wrong  
> Universe taking me in full bloom  
> Fireball careful with that there  
> See what you made me do  
> ["Must be Dreaming" by Frou Frou](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktv_12gzg-g)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sachi here! I's my turn to do "Update Thursday"! Sorry for the wait, I moved and had a looooong battle with Comcast about my internet. It was legendary. But we're back now! 
> 
> A few IMPORTANT notes on this chapter: This one has some strong mentions of past physical and mental abuse. We're not adding the "Rape/non-con" tag in the story because it's never going to be in the story itself. It will be mentioned throughout this chapter, and possibly a few more times in later chapters, but never in any detail whatsoever. I thought it was fitting to put this here for anyone who might be uncomfortable! (Of course we have to go into these darker things on MY chapter. Also be mindful of the rating change and the tags throughout the story)

"Stupid fucking dipshit, don't just stand there! And is that a  _smile_  I see on your face?! Get the fuck over here!"

For the record, your name isn't 'stupid fucking duipshit', but Karkat has always had a flair with words. You're Jake English, and you move toward the irritated demon and untangle him from his own sweater. It's pretty comical, actually. If it wasn't so ridiculously oversized, you doubt he'd have managed to have his arm slip into the neck hole at an angle he can't seem to work with, but he's always been pretty tiny, so you decide not to mention his taste in clothes, and instead go with your other most pressing question.

"Why in the world are you  _here_?" you ask, shoving his elbow down. He bends it like it's hurting, and then glares at you like it's your fault.

"I was  _summoned_  you floundering meat sack," he scowls. He stands up and looks miserably at his even  _more_  stretched out sweater, the neck of it loosely draping over one of his shoulders.

"Summoned?  _You?_ " You can't help it, you laugh into your fist, not even dodging when he charges at you.

"Let me tell you something, Jake fucking human English! Do you think I was sitting there and saying, 'wow I sure hope I get called to the shitty human realm tonight so I can see the most useless fucking dicklark in the universe'? No, okay, I was with Sollux and a fucking portal appeared under his chair, which I happened to be near, and then the next thing I know, here we are in Bumfuck Nowhere. So you can take your stupid big toothed smile and shove it up your own sweltering human ass, alright, I didn't ask for this!"

"I- I know, it's just—!" You keep laughing, mindful of the fact that he's literally turning as red as a tomato in his fury. But in your defense, he's always pretty angry about one thing or another. It's not a feat to get him this mad. "It's just that it was a group of silly teenagers who summoned you! They've already been scared away!"

"I sure hope so, or I'd have to bash their heads together." Karkat sighs loudly and gives you a scrutinizing look. "You sure look happy. At least one of us isn't feeling like complete shit."

"Oh, come now, Karkat, it's not all bad! It's a nice night at least! And besides, you could probably do with getting out a bit! Sollux is the fellow who is constantly on his computer, yes?"

"Don't even get me started on the long list of things that are wrong with Sollux Captor." He ruffles his hand through your hair before pushing your head away, shoving you right along with it. That's the Karkat version of affection. "He was doing some programming help for—" he pauses and looks up at you. And that's when you notice his expression change.

You've known him for a long,  _long_  time. He was the first demon you ever met, actually. Your grandmother was always having people in and out of the house, collecting extra money with her seances and her exorcism services. But Karkat has always been  _her_  friend, and by extension, your friend as well. You were tiny when you first learned of Derse, the realm of demons. And you were never really frightened of it, partially because of Karkat.

He's not like Dirk. You can look at him and tell he's not human. His skin has a gray hue to it, his eyes a yellowish color with red pupils. His teeth are sharp, every last one of them, and he lets you see them more often than not when he opens his mouth to yell at you. And in spite of all of these things, he helped you with your little kid issues that your grandmother was too busy for, like making blanket forts and playing adventurer with you. You were never scared of Derse and its inhabitants. Not until—well. Not for a long time.

You smile at him and pull him into a hug, which he verbally objects to, but returns like he always does.

"Gramma can probably fix your sweater," you tell him, wondering if that's what he's concerned about.

"Oh, fuck this sweater anyway. Is Jade still up? Since I'm here I might as well go see her," he says, looking over his shoulder. "Come on let's go. Let's go now."

"Yes, you haven't in ages! I'm sure she'd love to see you! Let me just go get..." You trail off when you notice he's not listening.

Karkat looks around again with wide eyes, and this time you  _know_  he's concerned about something.

"Is everything alright?"

"Yes," he says. Then he scowls and shakes his head. "Jake, you know I hate mentioning this to you since I know what it does to you...but Caliborn—"

"Don't." It takes you a moment to comprehend that word came from you without you even realizing you were speaking. "Please. Just Don't."

"He was the one asking for Sollux's help with some computer bullshit. Well, fuck that, he was demanding it. He was in the room with us."

Your blood runs cold and despite being in a huge graveyard it feels as though it's closing in on you. "He—he's here? He's here now?"

"I don't know," Karkat says. "But he might be."

Karkat is a very low level demon, and you've never met Sollux but you're assuming he is, too. Caliborn isn't. Caliborn is the biggest mistake you've ever made.

You'd been studying some of your grandmother's spell books. It was a little over two years ago, when her health first started to decline. You were already working at the coffeehouse, but you wanted to do all you could to take some responsibility off of her, so you were trying to learn all of her techniques. That was when you accidentally summoned him.

To this day, you're still uncertain why he answered your call. He's so strong—so  _evil_. Until him, you'd never seen such a dark side of Derse. He hovered over you and smiled wickedly, looking you up and down. And that was all it took.

For an entire  _year_ , he tortured you. It was under the guise of a relationship, though it was never of the romantic variety. Unfortunately, it  _was_  physical. Extremely so. And you never had a choice. You never wanted him, but he didn't care. He'd threatened your weakened grandmother, getting off even more so on your fear and panic. You couldn't tell anyone, especially your grandmother. The only one to ever know was Karkat, and he didn't find out until it was finally over.

You stare at him in fear, finally finding your voice. "I—I can't go..."

"Jake," he begins, "we have to—"

"No! You don't understand!" Your voice is high and panicked, your breaths coming faster. "My boyfriend is here and I can't leave him!"

Even in this extreme situation, you can't help but feel your stomach flip a little when you call Dirk your boyfriend.

You look around frantically, your body buzzing with adrenaline. You feel Karkat's hand on your shoulder but it's doing nothing to calm you down. Which way did Dirk go?! You have no way of finding him! You can't sense him and since Karkat is a weaker demon, he can't either.

"Jake, fuck, calm down!" Karkat grabs you around the waist and wrestles you to stand still. "Panicking isn't going to solve a goddamn thing!" He looks at you fiercely, "I'm not gonna let him do anything to you, okay? So calm the fuck down!"

You try to do as he says, knowing you're not helping anything. "Okay...okay I'm—I'm trying."

"Good. Sollux is in this trash pit of a graveyard somewhere, too. I like three against one much better if that bastard  _is_  here."

"Four," you say quietly. "Dirk is a demon, too. He'll be more useful that I could be."

"Dirk?" Karkat looks at you sternly. "Dirk  _Strider?_ "

"...yes?"

"God _dammit_ , Jake," he growls, running his hands through his already mussed hair. "I'm just gonna have to start controlling your love life because you're absolute  _shit_  at it. Why can't you just date a nice human like every other human in existence and leave the demon population alone?"

"I didn't know he  _was_  a demon!" you say defensively. "And even if I had, I wouldn't have cared! So what if he isn't human? Neither are you!"

"The  _point_ , Jake, is that you're  _dating_  Dirk Strider, who has more enemies in Derse than anyone I've ever heard of! It's dangerous! You just got out of something stupid and dangerous, and here you are again, diving headfirst off a cliff like a stupid gerbil beast!"

"Lemming," you supply helpfully, and he flicks your forehead. "Hey! It's not like that! Dirk isn't like Caliborn at  _all!_  He would never hurt me!"

"His record isn't exactly spotless," Karkat grumbles. "You aren't the only one who can't seem to date his own kind."

You're about to ask what he means by that when he grabs your hand and starts running back the way you came.

"Let's try to find them," he says. "Dirk's job is to send demons back to Derse, so this might not be too hard a job for him."

"And we aren't even certain Caliborn is here!" you add, feeling a bit more optimistic. "So this might all be for nothing!"

Still though, the thought looms over you. Even if you were extremely angry at Dirk for keeping his not being human a secret, you've not been entirely honest with him either. But really, how were you supposed to tell him about Caliborn? You never  _wanted_  to be with him. And every other demon seems to be afraid of him... What if Dirk leaves you, too?

But he said he loved you, didn't he? He wouldn't leave you. He wouldn't! Dirk is too good a guy, you're sure of it! But still...it's so much to ask for. After everything Caliborn did to you, you're certainly damaged goods. And Dirk has no idea...

You cling tightly to Karkat's hand and wish you were anyone other than yourself.

***

You are Dirk Strider, and you're pissed off at the world. Ok, maybe you're less pissed off at the world and more fearful for your new boyfriend's sake. You continue to sniff out his scent and follow it as you make your way through the graveyard. Sollux runs by your side, looking just as scared as he did when he first mentioned Caliborn's name.

"I've heard of Caliborn… leader of The Felt. But he was just a small fry. They all were. Why is everyone suddenly so scared of him? And what's this have to do with Jake?" you demand.

"It's got everything to do with Jake," Sollux huffs beside you, looking like he's having a tough time keeping up with you.

You feel bad but you can't slow down. Sollux is going to hate you, but you've got to run as fast as you can for Jake's sake. You scoop him up like a football, carrying him under your right arm, and keep running.

"Fucking hell Strider!" Sollux exclaims.

"Answer the question!" You demand again.

Sollux growls, grabbing onto your torso so that he stops flopping around as you run. Once he's situated, he shouts over the rush of wind. "Caliborn's caused serious problems for Derse ever since you left. You're lucky your parents ditched you on this worthless rock when they did!"

You tighten your hold on Sollux warningly and growl, "don't."

"Fuck Strider!" he barks. "Don't have to be such an asshole!"

"And you don't have to go through a portal back to Derse. I could just squish you," you offer kindly.

At your excessively pleasant request, Sollux doesn't talk about your parents anymore. Instead he continues answering your question, "Caliborn started climbing the ranks from a small fry street punk to a crime lord feared by everyone. He's stronger somehow. Like he keeps getting power from somewhere. And The Felt are still weak as shit but they regenerate like no tomorrow. Everyone's scared of them. They threaten friends and loved ones if you don't do what they want you to do. It's why I was even bothering to help Caliborn with his little hacker problem...FUCK!" Sollux screams as you leap over a decorative little ravine blocking your way.

"Go on," you command. You can smell Jake's scent a little stronger now. You can smell his fear and you are worried sick. "Go ON Sollux!"

"He-he always had little prizes he would tote around," the lesser demon stammers. "Fucktoys that he'd show off and discard when they weren't fun anymore."

Your blood runs cold. You know where this is going and you hate it.

"Usually they don't last a week," Sollux explains. "They break. They die for one reason or another. But Jake-Jake somehow lasted  _months_. Almost a year. Caliborn used him, beat him, abused him, but he wouldn't break. That's why… that's why everyone in Derse knows the name Jake English. Caliborn couldn't stop talking about how he was going to break him and destroy him."

"And?!" you growl, feeling like you should almost be there.

"And then one day we stopped hearing about Jake English. Caliborn said he got bored of him," Sollux explained. "We all thought he was dead, but Karkat found him."

Sollux looks like he has more to say, but you don't have time to listen to him.

You've finally found him. In the far distance you see your boyfriend, pinned against a tombstone by a giant green monster. "JAKE!" you scream, putting Sollux down so you can flash step even faster.

You've got to get to him before anything happens.

You HAVE to!

You're going to rip Caliborn to shreds for what he's done to Jake!

You're-

***

You're Jake again, and you cry out as you're ripped away from Karkat. You don't even have to look to know who has you. Even if you can't sense him, there's no one else it could be. Dirk would never handle you so roughly.

Karkat is thrown to the side, colliding headfirst with a tombstone. He doesn't get back up. Uselessly, you fight against the strong hold, trying to get to your friend. A strong grip grabs your jaw, and you're forced to look into the bright red eyes of Caliborn, as you have far too many times before. He smiles his sickly sweet smile at you, his teeth sharp and gleaming. He's not even trying to disguise himself tonight. He's in his true demon form, his skin slightly green looking, but somehow this is less disturbing than when he looks completely normal. This way at least you  _know_  how strong and inhuman he really is.

"Jake," he coos at you, holding your body tightly to him as his eyes appraise you. "You look  _good_. Damn good."

"I-I've been...keeping better company!" you say fiercely, trying to kick him. Alas, you can't get the leverage.

He laughs and you  _hate_  it, knowing he's laughing at  _you_. You've always seemed to be his favorite thing to laugh at. Especially when you try to fight.

"You're putting up a  _fight_  again!" he says. "It's been so  _long_. Last time I saw you, there was no fight left."

You growl and try again to get him to release you.

"You let me go! You said there was nothing else you wanted from me! So why are you doing this now?!"

"That was before when you were broken." He pulls you closer. "Now you're not so broken. Not yet. I would like to break you again." You cringe when he puts his face in your hair and inhales deeply. He growls formidably as he glares at you. "You smell like someone else."

Unable to think of anything else to say, you glare right back at him.

" _Jake,"_ he snarls, his hand moving to your throat where he squeezes tightly. "Who else have you been with? You're  _mine_."

"I'm not!" you croak, finding it increasingly hard to speak with his hand closing your windpipe. "I was n-never...yours!"

He roars with rage and yanks your head to the side so he can sink his teeth into your neck. Unlike when Dirk did it, it does  _not_  feel good. It  _hurts_ , and you cry out in pain as he drinks your blood deeply, swallowing mouthful after mouthful. Weakly, you try and push him away but it's no use. You don't have half his strength on your best day, and the way he's drinking you won't have any strength at all soon enough.

He pulls away and hisses in your ear, "You are  _mine_."

When he did this to you before, you were always quick to agree with him because it made him less aggressive. But now, maybe because of your new relationship, or maybe because of the blood loss, you shake your head.

"'M not...not yours..."

It was, apparently, not the best thing to say.

He slams you into a large tombstone, knocking it a bit loose in the ground but mainly just rattling your brain when your head hits it. You feel a little bad about the grave he's harassing you over. Hopefully the departed person's spirit passed on because defiled graves are one of the main reasons they get upset. You'll have to offer an apology when you get away.

_If_  you get away.

He's never let you get away from him unscathed and you doubt he's about to break that streak now. You close your eyes as his hands go for your zipper, accepting your fate. You hope Dirk isn't having trouble... Hopefully he won't find you like this. That's one image you don't want him to have of you. You're a huge hypocrite for getting angry with him about not being honest with you. You  _never_  intended to tell him about Caliborn. You never wanted  _anyone_  to know.

You'll have to break it off with Dirk. You don't want him fighting Caliborn. Demons are so scared of him for a reason, and you don't want Dirk getting hurt because of you. It's not worth it.  _You're_  not worth it. You think of how wonderful he's been to you so far and you try to focus on the way his gravelly voice sounds as Caliborn bites you again. Gosh, but you love the sound of Dirk's voice. Even now, in your memories, it sounds clear as a bell.

"JAKE!"

Huh. It sounds even clearer than you thought!

You open your eyes to see him running toward you, another demon beside him in silly 3D glasses. Caliborn pulls away from your neck to snarl at them and you blink in confusion, too light-headed and weak to understand the situation. Caliborn has taken a  _lot_  of blood from you.

"Let go of him  _now_ ," Dirk growls, lifting his sword, "and I may not make it as painful when I chop you to fuckin'  _pieces_."

"Dirk Strider," Caliborn smiles, sniffing the air. " _You're_  the one he smells like." He tosses you to the side like a rag doll and you curl around yourself feebly, thinking this has to be worst thing for Dirk to possibly see after  _just_  becoming your boyfriend. You're just an unlucky bungler, that's all there is to it.

"Sadly for you, Dirk Strider, he is  _mine_ ," Caliborn says. "I've already claimed him. Find a different cumslut."

God, that name. You  _hate_  when he calls you that. Like you ever had a choice in whether or not to be with him! You moan quietly and try to get up but you can't... Where he bit you is on fire and you're too weak to support yourself.

"Jake..." Dirk says sadly from somewhere. You can't see him from your current fetal position and you're glad he can't see you either. You already look pathetic enough. He doesn't have to see you cry, too.

"Please...please go..." you manage to say to him. "Don't fight..."

"See? He knows who he belongs to," Caliborn says with a fondness in his tone that makes you cringe.

Dirk snarls so loudly that you pull your hands away from your face in surprise to look at him, but you barely see him as he charges forward.

"No!" you shout, but it's too late. In an instant Dirk's blade is in Caliborn's hand, being pried away from him.

Dirk jumps back, his teeth bared and his eyes glowing through his shades, and you wonder how you ever could have thought he was human. He looks over at you before he roars with rage again, managing to land a punch in Caliborn's face, dodging when the larger demon tries to grab him. Dirk is  _fast!_  But your attention is on Caliborn because he's...smiling. He's not the least bit worried about your boyfriend hurting him. And that terrifies you.

"You aren't gonna touch him ever again!" Dirk hisses. He looks Caliborn up and down, seeming to be sizing him up. "You're goin' back to Derse where you belong!"

He charges again, but this time, he doesn't get away. Caliborn grabs his wrist, flipping him onto the ground and stomping on his chest.

"I can go wherever I want," Caliborn grins. "That can be Derse. And it can be  _not_  Derse." He growls and stomps again. "Right now I think where I want to be is on top of you."

You scream as Caliborn kicks him over and over again, filling the air with sickening snapping and crunching noises. A stream of blood spurts from Dirk's mouth and then—and then he stops moving.

"CALIBORN, PLEASE!" You beg, finally pulling yourself into a sitting position as you try to desperately reach Dirk. "Leave him alone, please, I'm yours!" You fall to the ground again as you cry, your arms shaking so badly they won't hold you up anymore. "I'll do whatever you want just—please stop hurting him..."

"I'm not going to kill you, Dirk Strider," you hear Caliborn say after a long silence, and you breathe a sigh of relief. "I want you to watch as I take him again and again. I want you to be powerless to stop me. You think he's  _your_  human?" He laughs wickedly, kicking Dirk a final time. "I heard from Ampora that the almighty Strider had a human now. You haven't even  _claimed_  him yet. And you never will."

Frantically, you look around for anything that could help. Dirk's sword, where did it fly off to?! You see the other demon trying to wake Karkat up, and you think to yourself that that must be Sollux before your world shifts as something lifts you in the air by the collar of your shirt. Blindly, you kick and punch in front of you, but it's not use. You're not strong enough to hurt Caliborn. And it's  _your_  fault Dirk is hurt now, too.

"C-Caliborn, please..." you say quietly as he presses you into the tombstone again. "Don't do this...not in front of him...he's the only one that's treated me like...like he loves me..."

"I do not make promises," he snarls at you, his eyes flashing multiple colors. "I will have you. And when he attacks again, I will crush him."

"Jake..." Dirk moans feebly, coughing a worrying amount of blood up. You cry out and try to get to him.

"Isn't that so sweet!" Caliborn laughs. "He's coughing up blood for you! I think that you should bleed for me too, Jake." He slides a claw over your cheek, slicing into your skin. You whimper as he leans in to lick the blood away.

You never wanted any of this to happen. You just wanted to help your grandmother and maybe make coffee for your cute vampire boyfriend. But everything to do with you ends up spiraling out of control so you really shouldn't have expected this to be any different.

Just as you start to accept the fact that nothing is going to save any of you, you're suddenly let go of, your body toppling to the ground for the second time tonight. You look up to see someone that looks—remarkably like Dirk! He jumps on Caliborn, lifting a sword and plunging it into his neck.

"YOU—FUCK!" Caliborn screams, thrashing around, but this other fellow is as fast as Dirk, staying just out of Caliborn's reach as he stabs into the other side of his neck, pressing the sword forward until a stream of blood shoots into the sky. You take the opportunity to crawl forward to Dirk's side.

"Jake..." Dirk moans, and you sigh in relief, cradling him to you and petting his face.

"You're alright," you tell him. "Someone is taking care of Caliborn now."

"...what's he look like?"

"Um. Quite a bit like you, actually!"

Dirk moans again. "Fuckin' great..." He opens his eyes and you're just now aware of the fact his shades were knocked away, revealing his orange eyes. You  _love_  his eyes so much! They reveal he isn't human, but more than that, he's so expressive without those silly shades. His eyes trail to your neck, and he growls softly.

"He hurt you..."

You touch your neck and feel where Caliborn's teeth pierced you. Your hand is covered in blood as you pull it away, and you laugh awkwardly, trying not to worry Dirk.

"Oh, yes! It's alright, though. He hurt you much worse. Are you—are  _you_  going to be okay?"

"Jake," he says gently, pulling himself up. He cups your cheek and gives you such a sad look you wonder for a moment if he's dying. "He  _hurt_  you. Didn't he?"

You stare at him confusedly. You're not all that hurt, considering! You're grateful all your clothes are still on, too. You'll have to thank your savior for making it in the nick of time to save your dignity, at least.

But as Dirk holds your gaze, you slowly understand. He doesn't mean tonight. He means before. Before you met him, when you summoned Caliborn by accident and sealed your own fate. You open your mouth, but no words come out. Nothing but a squeaking noise as your eyes burn and your vision blurs. You can't even look at him as your body shakes with suppressed sobs and you nod your head.

This is it, isn't it? He's going to leave you. He's going to know Caliborn won't just go away and leave you alone. He won't risk this happening to him again, not if he's smart. You haven't even had him for an entire day yet and you're already losing him.

You squeak again as you're pulled against him, and you bury your face in his neck, breathing him in as he holds you, petting your hair and murmuring soft comforts to you. You can't hold in your tears anymore, and you hope he forgives you for messing up his collar with tears and...other fluids.

"I- I'm so s-s-sorry!" You cry and hug him tightly as you try to form coherent sentences. "I n-never meant to! I didn't w-want it!"

"Shhhh, it's okay, baby. I don't blame you in the least, alright? It's him who should be sorry. It's his tears of pain I wanna see, not yours." He pulls you away from his neck and kisses your cheeks, his hands moving to try and dry your face, which is a losing battle. "I'm here now. No one's ever gonna hurt you again."

"But he h-hurt  _you_!" With another wail, you reacquaint your face with his neck. "You're coughing up bl-blood!"

He sighs softly. "That was my fault. Underestimated his strength. Never dealt with a demon who used such strong bursts of energy before. He's way stronger than he looks but he's no 'lord of the demons'. He's not gettin' anywhere near you ever again, Jake."

You hug him tighter before you remember his injuries. You breathe an apology to him but he just laughs.

"I'm a demon, Jake," he says. "It's already mostly healed. It's  _you_  we gotta worry about. C'mere."

He licks the scratch on your face, and you can feel the sting go away. You're positive your face is bright red because he laughs at you again before he leans into your neck, licking the deeper wound. You gasp softly because it  _stings_ , and he rubs your shoulders comfortingly. You feel him swallow—is he  _drinking_  from you now of all times?! You whine and try to pull away.

"Bear with me, Jake," he says. "Gotta get the venom out, alright?"

Venom? Caliborn's bitten you plenty of times before but you've never died! You push him again, but he keeps drinking, and your lightheadedness returns tenfold. You've lost so much blood already... Dirk seems to think along the same lines.

"Fuck," he breathes, pulling away after he licks the wound a final time, closing it. "I can't get it all. It's spread too much."

"Am...I going to die?"

"No, it's not that kinda venom. I'm willin' to bet it's how he—well. We can deal with that in a little bit. But you'll be fine, I swear. I'm gonna stay with you, baby."

You flop into him, still crying feebly. "Don't take me home like this," you moan. "Gramma has enough to worry about and she never knew about Caliborn."

"You can stay with me," he coos, nuzzling into you. "I can't be separated from you tonight anyway. Need to see you with my own eyes and know you're alright."

You calm down at the prospect of him holding you all night, and you unashamedly crawl forward until you're in his lap, wrapped around him like a jacket. He doesn't seem to mind.

"Nah, that's cool. Just saved y'alls asses and I don't even get a greeting? Not even a proper introduction to the human you're stranglin'."

Dirk groans and mutters a strong, "Go AWAY, Dave," into your hair. You look curiously up at the stranger who saved you.

"Dave..." you say quietly to yourself. Dirk's  _brother_  Dave?! And here you are, crying on top of Dirk like a baby! What a nifty first impression you're making!

"Nah. Also, why the fuck are you hurt, anyway? You let him get the drop on you, didn't you? Fuck, man, you always told me 'never let a demon get you to the ground' and there you are, on the ground. You know how long I've been waitin' for you to screw up? Pretty damn long. This is a joyous day," Dave says so quickly it's hard to follow. He raises his eyebrow at your staring, and you hurriedly blush and stammer an apology.

"S-sorry!"

"He's cute," Dave says matter-of-factly. "Still a human though. God, tonight's just full of you messin' up all over, ain't it, bro? Gettin' hurt, droolin' all over a human. Almost like you didn't learn your lesson last time."

Last time?

"Go  _away,_  Dave!" Dirk growls again, turning to glare at him. "Fine,  _thank_  you, I owe you one. Now go the fuck away!"

"Nah," Dave says again, crossing his arms over his chest. "It's been boring and I haven't seen you in a while. I'm gonna just sit here and enjoy this moment."

You sit awkwardly as Dirk continues to cling to you, murmuring insults at Dave under his breath. You look up at the lanky Strider and offer him a shaky grin.

"Um. I'm Jake English. I'm..."

"My boyfriend," Dirk finishes for you.

"Yeah, kinda figured," Dave says. "Dirk's got a big brain but it's full of the snowy stuff that tells you your T.V. doesn't work."

You get the feeling Dave doesn't like you very much. You don't blame him. You  _did_  kind of get his brother hurt.

"Hey, assholes," the demon with the 3D glasses says, gaining all of your attentions. He's holding up an unconscious Karkat and you whine, trying to stand up and reach him, but you're so wobbly!

"You alright, Sollux?" Dirk asks him. So that  _is_  Sollux. He looks like he's pissed off, but that could just be his face. You probably shouldn't ask.

"Good as can be. I'm gonna get back to my programming and leave this dweeb in the floor. Maybe run over him with my swivel chair a few times."

"Be nice to him!" you say frantically. "Karkat is my friend!"

"Yeah, yeah. He's talked about you," Sollux says, offering you a look that might be...pitying? "I'll take care of him."

In a flash, he's gone, carrying Karkat with him. You'll have to make sure Karkat's okay later when you can actually see straight.

"Who the fuck was that?" Dave asks.

"Sollux," Dirk replies. "You met him when you were like, two. Not surprised you don't remember him."

"I like his glasses."

"You fuckin' would."

Dirk shifts around and lifts you up, cradling you close to him as he moves forward to grab his sword, and then further to the left to put his shades back on. He gives Dave a look.

"Don't you have anything better to do than bug the fuck out of me?"

"You know, normally I'd be all 'fuck yeah I do', but really I don't. It's been dead as shit lately and that's why I answered the call so fast to come here and save your sorry ass," Dave shrugs. "What are y'all up to now, anyway?"

You yawn and curl closer to Dirk. "I have an early shift tomorrow," you say. "I should probably be hitting the hay soon."

Dave sighs for an impressive amount of time.

"Fine, go sleep and be old losers. I'll find somethin' to do."

"Yeah, go find a life. You've only been failin' at it the past hundred years or so," Dirk grunts.

"This is  _not_  the way you're supposed to treat me after I saved your ass," Dave huffs.

"How many times have I saved yours over the years? Too many to count. I take back what I said earlier, I don't owe you shit. This just takes one away from the massive pile of favors you owe me."

"I hope your fuckin' hair falls out."

"I hope your computer crashes and dies and all your shit comics get deleted."

They stare at each other silently before Dave flicks him off and turns around, leaving the graveyard.

"Thank you!" you call after him. "He saved us, Dirk! You should be nicer!"

"It's  _Dave_ , baby. If I was nice he might have an aneurysm. Now let's get you to my place and clean you up."

He holds you closely and runs fast toward his place, but not as fast as you'd seen him move before. He must be trying to be careful for your sake and make the ride less bumpy for you. You smile and nuzzle into his neck, kissing the skin gently. He's so good to you. He's so much more than you deserve.

You look up curiously when he stops walking. You're in front of a very ordinary looking house in an extremely normal neighborhood.

"Home sweet home," he says, moving to unlock the door. You look around and try to see everything as best as you can in total darkness but all you see are shapes. To your surprise, he carries you  _downstairs_ , flipping a switch to light the total blackness clouding your vision. You see a fully furnished basement that he's turned into a bedroom. There are no windows and...there's an extremely soft looking king sized bed in the corner that looks like it's been recently used. He grins at your expression.

"Expecting a coffin in a cave?" he asks, and you bristle.

"No!" You totally were.

"Thing is, I sleep during the day. Why the fuck am I gonna do that in something as depressing as a coffin? Nah, I'll take my bed. Come to think of it, you can sleep right in there with me." He winks at you. " _After_  you're cleaned up."

"Am I gross?" You don't think you're  _that_  bloody.

"Yes. You were crawling around in a graveyard. Plus that fuckin' monster was—" He growls and carries you to the bathroom. "Anyway, you could use a shower. But I think a bath would be better now."

You watch as he fills the tub with hot water, leaning into him subconsciously. He looks at you uncertainly when the tub is full.

"You want me to get out? I'll just be in the other room."

You shake your head. "I don't think I can get out of my clothes alone," you say, embarrassed.

He nods and gently helps pull your shirt off, and then your jeans and boxer-briefs. They're covered in little green skulls since you weren't expecting him to  _see_  them so soon, but he doesn't comment. You wince as he sets you in the tub, and you grab his sleeve when he tries to turn away again.

"Stay..." you say softly. "Please?"

He looks relieved, like he wanted you to say that, and he leans next to the tub, kissing your hair. You whimper when his lips press against a sore patch—where your head slammed against the tombstone, you recall. He frowns and rubs in gently.

"I can't heal that..." he muses. "Are you disoriented at all? Should I be worried about a concussion?"

"No, I don't think so. I'm just...extremely tired." You lean against the wall of the tub and close your eyes. "I'm so sorry I wasn't honest with you, Dirk."

"Jake..."

"No, let me finish. I was never intending to tell you about him. How could I? He—he did horrible things to me. He said he'd kill my grandmother if I went against him so there was no way I could fight him, even if I  _was_  strong enough. And he..." You swallow. This is the hard part. "He only let me go because...it stopped being fun for him. I stopped fighting. He...he broke me."

Dirk looks at you sadly, petting your bangs away from your forehead. "Broke you?" he asks quietly.

You look at the bathwater in favor of looking at him as you whisper, "I tried to kill myself."

It's so silent in the bathroom that the sound of a drop of water leaking into the tub from the faucet makes you jump. You look to the side to see Dirk's gripping the edge so hard his knuckles are white.

You show him your wrist and the long white scar running from your wrist to your forearm, not daring to look at his face.

"It was hopeless," you say almost inaudibly. "He was coming for me every morning, every night. He would pull me away from my friends, disguised as a human, and then he'd— _defile_  me in every way he knew how. I couldn't fight him and I couldn't find anyone that could. So I...I did this. And it was so  _stupid_ , so  _selfish_. What would Gramma have done if I'd died?" You growl at your own stupidity. "But I didn't cut deep enough. As bad as it looks, it wasn't enough to kill me. I passed out and when I woke up, Karkat was sitting next to my bed, looking like he wanted to kill me and hug me at the same time. I eventually told him the whole story, and he's the only one who knows. Aside from you now. Caliborn didn't come back after that. I don't know if it was because he...actually  _cared_ , but I highly doubt it. He basically confirmed tonight that I wasn't making it fun for him anymore. Until now. Now that you're in the picture he's not going to stop. You've given him a challenge and he'll be back. He's never going to leave me alone."

You yelp as Dirk slides in the water with you, fully clothed, to hug you to him.

"Dirk! What the—I'm  _in the bath_!"

"Baby..." he says quietly, kissing your cheeks and then your lips. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I wasn't in your life sooner. That you had to go through... _that_. Caliborn better pray I don't see his ass again because I'm gonna tear him to pieces— _Jake_..."

You tilt against him and sigh, hugging him to you. "You're not going to leave me? Even knowing all the...baggage that comes along with me?"

"I could never just  _leave you_ , Jake," he mumbles. "Especially because some piece of shit decided to mistreat you for so long. I'm here for you, baby. I already told you I love you. That means a helluva lot more to me than just ditchin' you for somethin' that's not even your fault."

You tear up again and hug him closer, sniffling as you pet through his damp hair. "I love you, too..."

He tenses in your arms. Shit! Were you not supposed to say that?

"You don't have to say it back," he says softly, pulling away to look at you. "We just got together today...I understand if you wanna wait a while to make it more official. Vampires move a lot faster than your kind. I can go as slow as you need, though."

You shake your head and kiss him lovingly. "It's more than just how long we've been together and how long I've known you. It's—I feel like I'm... _supposed_  to be with you. As soon as I spoke to you, it felt that way. And I've never felt something like that in my life! And you know everything about me and all the bullshit I cause and you're...still here. You still want to be with me and that just confirms what I've been thinking all night. I love you. And I...I've never said that to anyone before aside from family but I  _mean_  it, Dirk. I love you and I want to stay with you. For...as long as you'll have me."

You grin at him uncertainly and he makes a small noise as he pulls you into another kiss, this one firmer and more heated than the last. You gasp and nip his bottom lip, mindful of the fact that both of you are  _in the tub_  but you're too riled up to care much. He presses you into the wall and kisses you stupid and you're certain your lips are swollen from all the attention. Finally he pulls away and leans his forehead against yours.

"I want you forever, Jake. It's—so weird you described exactly how I felt when I saw you. Like I  _needed_  to be with you. But that's nothing unusual for a vampire." He grins at you. "You sure you're human?"

"Fairly certain!" you laugh, kissing him again. "But...erm. I think I should wash off now."

"Huh? Oh. Yeah. Fuck." He gets out of the tub, dripping wet, and you can't help the way your eyes stray to the front of his jeans.

He must have  _really_  liked kissing you.

You let him go into the next room to change while you borrow his toiletries. His shampoo looks and smells expensive compared to yours. But then again you buy dollar brands to save money. He must be really successful to have this nice house and all these wonderful things!

You're rinsing off again when you feel...odd. Like you're getting hotter from the inside out. Worried, you touch your face, wondering if you're getting a fever. Everything is  _burning_!

"Dirk!" you call worriedly, fidgeting in the water and moaning at the strange feeling. It's starting to  _hurt_. " _Dirk!"_

He runs back in, carrying some of his clothes for you, and you notice his eyes stray down to your lap. He swallows, his eyes huge as he moves back toward you.

"The venom," he says gently, kneeling beside the tub again. "He was using it to—arouse you. You're okay, I'm here..."

"Make it  _stop_ ," you whine, giving him a pitiful look. " _Please_  Dirk— _hurts_!"

He makes a small noise, his eyes shifting down again before shooting back up to yours. "Are—are you sure? It's your body reacting to what  _he_  did to you...I don't want to do anything like that until you  _want_  it, Jake."

"I  _do_  want you, I—DIRK!" you cry out.

There's a small splash as his hand plunges in the water, and you moan unashamedly as his fingers wrap around your arousal, pumping you fast. You grip the sides of the tub and lean back, pressing your hips further up into his grasp.

"Dirk...nnnm! Dirk! Feels—still hot...still..."

"Shhh, let me take care of you," he says into your ear, his voice sweet and low. "Give it to me, Jake. Let it go, okay?"

You whimper and nod dumbly as he pumps you to release, your body jerking as you cry out his name. You sink into the water, shaking from the force of your orgasm. You're barely aware of him lifting you and drying you off, helping you into some of his clothes. You giggle sleepily at how big they are on you, his pajama pants falling off your hips. You sigh gratefully when your back meets a soft surface and he moves in next to you, holding you close to him.

"Feelin' better?" he asks quietly.

"Mmhmm," you murmur, snuggling closer to him greedily. It's only when you're closer that you notice his own pressing need. "Dirk...?"

"Sorry," he says, pulling his hips away from you.

"Nnn...no, I was..." You yawn, reaching for him. "Let me help you..."

He gasps softly as your hand presses into the front of his pajama bottoms, cupping him firmly. His hands move to your shoulders.

"Jake— _fuck_ ," he breathes. "Y-you really...don't have to..."

"I know I don't  _have_  to," you say, looking down as you reach into his pajamas, grabbing him directly. "I  _want_  to."

He buries his face in your hair as you return the favor, your hand gaining speed as it works over him. He makes tiny sounds he tries to muffle, his hands tightening around your shoulders as he comes in your hand, his body sinking into the bed like it completely exhausted him. You know the feeling. You're so tired you can't even keep your eyes open!

You move closer to him again, tucking your face into his neck as your arms wrap around his waist. You try to keep your soiled hand off his sheets but you're pretty sure you fail miserably. He doesn't seem to care. He kisses your hair and makes a happy, contented noise, pulling you even firmer against him, your body melding to his.

You smile to yourself at how tenderly he's holding you, how he asked you if he could touch you. He treats you so wonderfully. He's exactly what you were always longing for on those miserable nights after Caliborn would leave you stripped of your dignity. You've never been held as you've fallen asleep. Not like this, at least. You don't think your grandmother counts.

"Love you, Dirk..." you mumble into his neck. "Love you..."

You don't hear his response, but you know when you wake up, he'll still be there. And that's all you need to feel safe and warm as you drift off in his arms.


	5. Jake's Revenge

Jake stays the night with you.  And the next night.  And the next.

You are Dirk Strider, and you’re the happiest vampire in the world.  You suppose some other vampires might be pretty happy too, but your little bro is the only one you talk to.  And since Dave’s a miserable little asshole, you’re pretty sure that makes you the happiest.

Jake only leaves you during the day to work his job at the coffee shop. After you meet up with him at night, he always comes back home with you.  

You’ve had some of the best makeout sessions.

Due to recent circumstances, you haven’t gone too far with Jake.  It isn’t that you don’t want to go farther, but you don’t want to scare your new boyfriend away.  Jake hasn’t exactly been forthcoming with information about Caliborn, but you can guess what happened to him in the past.  You couldn’t hate Caliborn any more than you do, and you’re determined to make sure that what happened to Jake never happens again.

After all, now you’re in his life.  And even though he doesn’t know it yet, you know that Jake English is your mate.  And as his mate, it’s your job to love him and protect him from everything.

It took you a while to come to terms with that.  You spent many nights in the coffee shop with Jake, simply sipping your coffee on a comfortable lounge chair in the back and watching him work.  You know he loves you, quite possibly as much as you love him.

And you really love him.  You smile when you see the sparkle in his emerald eyes when his gaze catches yours.  You melt inside at the charming grin that he so casually tosses your way throughout the evening.  And you absolutely love when his shifts are over and you’re able to wrap him in your arms and kiss him to your heart’s content.

You’ve decided that making out with Jake English is nice.

And sometime, a few days after the whole Caliborn incident, you realize that Jake Fucking Human English is your mate.  A HUMAN is your mate.  The one being you were meant to be with for the rest of your life.  The one you’ve been waiting for all these years.

It was hard enough to accept that you loved him, but this is even harder.  This has never had a precedent before.  There has never been a human and demon mating that you know of.

At least— not one that both survived.

The thought that your cute little human barista boy is your soul mate is mind blowing in every sense of the term.  Several times, Jake has caught you staring and actually shook you for a few minutes, laughing at your “brooding expression.”

It took you a long time to accept it, but now you have.  Jake is the one you’re meant to spend the rest of your life with.  You love him more than anything, definitely more than life itself.  But—how exactly does this work with a human mate?

You start to get concerned.  Some might even say a little clingy, but Jake doesn’t seem to notice or mind.

As the days pass, you spend longer and longer at the coffee shop. You come as early as you possibly can so that you can be with Jake longer.  You don’t want to risk anything bad happening to him.  You spend every evening with him, wrapped around him in your comfortable king sized bed.  You love him and protect him as much as you possibly can.

If you have a mission, you try to take care of it quickly before you see him.  You know Jake has magical capabilities, but you don’t want to risk him getting hurt.  So far, Derse has actually been a little quiet, with very few monsters daring to cross after the incident with Caliborn.  At least, that’s why you assume it’s quiet.

You leave the coffee shop after his shift ends, and he insists on walking hand-in-hand.  You squeeze his gently and he gives you one of his award-winning charming smiles.

“So Strider,” he begins casually.  “Would you care to see a quality film in the cinemas today?”

No.  You really wouldn’t care to see anything in the theaters right now. You know for a fact that there is nothing but crap out, and you and Jake have already watched the two or three half-way decent movies out.  That only leaves the less than half-way decent movies.

But you love Jake English, and you would spend your time doing anything he wanted to do.  So you find yourself starting to nod when a terrible noise fills the air.

Your cell phone.  And it’s a tone that unfortunately Jake has come to recognize.

His eyes light up as he looks at you and asks, “ooh!  What are we battling tonight?!  Are we helping more ghosts cross over?  Dueling some goblins?  Showing some demon scum what’s for?!!”

You turn to him quickly and say, “we aren’t doing any of that.”

For once in his life, Jake balks and looks at you with confusion.  “What—what are you saying, Strider?”

“I’m saying it’s too dangerous for you out there,” you tell him, caressing his cheek lovingly.  “I care about you too much baby.  Can’t lose you.  Can’t have a repeat of the other night.”

You had thought Jake might be a little upset, but the expression behind his eyes is like an icy winter storm. “Excuse you! I can handle myself!  I’ve proven my worth time and again and I hardly think that I need to be coddled like an infant!”

“Jake, I love you,” you tell him simply.  “I’m not bringin’ you with me on these missions anymore.  They’re dangerous.  I’m not gonna lose you.”

When you try to fold him in your arms for a hug, he quickly shrugs you away.  “Fine then!” he responds shrilly, backing away.

You furrow your brows, a little hurt.  “We can still hang out a little—” you attempt to say, but he cuts you off quickly.

“No no!  You do your dangerous work.  I’ve just remembered that I have a few errands to run!” he says, walking away from you.

“Errands?” you ask.  “At midnight?”

“Yes!  Gramma needs someone to rub the corns on her feet with peppermint oil and we’re all out!”  Jake says, a strange edge to his voice as he keeps walking away. “Have yourself a fantastic evening, Strider!  I’ll just be off doing my own non-dangerous things!”

Jake takes off at a mad dash away from you.  You let him go.  What the fuck else are you supposed to do?

Humans are strange beings, you remind yourself.  It may still be a while before you understand human boyfriends.

It may be even longer before you come close to comprehending Jake English.

* * *

As soon as you walk in the store the following evening, you sense it.  Something is different.

The décor of the coffee shop is the same.  Jake is working tonight, as usual. The patrons are the same. Even the small dog that the lady down the street always insists on bringing is sitting on the floor.

Everything looks the same.

But you can’t seem to shake the feeling that something is off tonight.  The Sesame Street song you and Dave ironically adopted as your theme song for a week starts playing in your head.  “One of these things is not like the other.”

You really couldn’t handle the song longer than that.  And you can’t handle this edgy feeling you’re getting in here.  Maybe you’re just excited to see Jake after you didn’t get to spend the night with him.  That’s probably it.

You walk up to the counter and find Jake standing behind it, waiting for you with a wide and nearly blinding smile.  You don’t think you’ve ever seen him smile so widely before.

“Why hello Dirk!”  He greets you, shaking your hand enthusiastically.  “It’s so good to see you tonight!  So glad you decided to swing on by my little old coffee shop!”

“Of course, English,” you murmur. “I kind of come every night.”

You lean in to kiss him, but he turns aside quickly, picking up a plastic cup and moving towards the back counter.  “There’s a simply darling recipe I want you to try!”

Jake doesn’t give you a chance to say no, and you wouldn’t anyway. He’s already grinding up the coffee beans and throwing a bunch of things you can’t see into your drink.  When he finishes, he practically skips up to the counter and hands it to you proudly.  “Here!  Try it!”

It tastes like monkey ass.  Not that you’ve ever tasted a monkey’s ass, but it’s how you imagine it would taste.

You try your best to remain composed.  Thankfully, you have decades of experience doing just that and manage to sip half of it down without so much as a slight grimace.  “It’s— different, Jake.  What did you put in it?”

“Oh, I thought the normal menu was boring so I thought I’d add a little something of my own!” Jake explains cheerily, already whipping up another drink for you.

“Are you chopping up onions?” You ask, noticing the near maniacal chopping your boyfriend is doing behind the counter.

“Of course!” he exclaims.

“Onions in coffee?” the other barista, who looks remarkably similar to Jake, says.  You’ve frequented the coffee shop enough to know that this barista is his cousin John.  “Dude, that’s gross.”

“Onions are perfectly DELIGHTFUL in anything!” Jake insists, scooping the pile into the cup.  Your mouth opens slightly as you watch him mash up a pickle and half a block of ramen noodles, adding those to the cup of onions before pouring coffee over the whole mess.  He flourishes it by squeezing a lemon into the cup, tossing the spent peel and all the seeds inside.   Proudly, he thrusts it at you. “For YOU!  Free of charge!”

“Wow, thanks,” you murmur, having only just barely managed to choke down the last cup. Now that you’ve seen what he put in this cup, you can’t help wondering what he put in the last. When you take a sip, it’s predictably awful.

“It’s a Japanese delicacy!” he declares, leaning against the counter onto his palms and eyeing you in what you can only describe as a challenging way.

You happen to be well versed in Japanese delicacies.

This is not a Japanese delicacy.

You stare at Jake.

Jake smiles that blinding smile back at you, expectantly waiting for your reaction.

“You know, maybe you should stick with the drinks on the chalkboard, baby,” you suggest casually.

“Pish posh!  Those are so boring, Dirk!” Jake says, looking frustrated that he’s not getting a reaction from you.  “Come now, don’t you like my drinks?  I’ve put so much thought into them!  All that time I was being so safe last night and not doing anything dangerous at all, I was thinking about what to make you today!”

You stare at him blankly.  “Tell me this isn’t some stupid revenge for me tellin’ you to stay safe last night.”

Apparently that wasn’t the right thing to say.  Jake looks pissed at you, and his voice grows shrill as he shrieks, “Dirk you are just—terrible tonight!  Fine!  I was saving this, but I’ll show you the last thing I bought for you now!”

As soon as Jake opens the door to the mini-fridge behind the counter, you smell it and gag.  When Jake places the necklace of garlic cloves around his neck, you literally fly to the opposite side of the building, tripping over two chairs and a small dog in your haste to get away.

You breathe rapidly with your back pressed against the wall as you perspire for perhaps the first time in your undead life.  You’ve heard of the power of garlic against your kind, but you’ve never had to experience it like this before.  You don’t frequent human grocery stores much, and when you do occasionally drop in for some of your favorite orange soda, the garlic is nicely wrapped up inside its natural crown.  It’s unpleasant, but you never have much of a problem with it.

Jake has unwrapped the garlic crowns and stranded the bare cloves right into the necklace, and it REEKS.  It’s like the stench of pure evil, which you think you’d probably be able to handle better than this.

Jake’s eye twitches as he watches you writhe against the wall.  “What do you think, Strider?  This necklace should do a dandy job of protecting me against demons of every appalling nature!”

“Baby...” you murmur weakly.

“What’s that?” he asks, leaning his ear toward you. “I can’t hear you from how SAFE I am over here!”

“Baby, please…” you wince, your instincts telling you to GET OUT OF THE STORE NOW.  You have to fight yourself to stay in the shop, but you do it.  You do it for Jake.

You’d do anything for Jake.

Jake’s brow twitches again, and he seems like he’s having a minor internal struggle, which you doubt matches your own right now.  “Strider, I’m afraid you’ll have to be more specific with your language.”

“Please put it away baby!” you wince.

Jake’s brows twitch again, and he looks like he’s about to tear up, probably from the awful stench of the garlic.

“I kind of agree with him,” John says, holding his shirt over his nose.  “That reeks.”

“Well fine!  If you’re all going to gang up on me, then I’m just going to leave and walk out into the DANGEROUS nighttime!!  My shift is almost over anyway!” Jake declares loudly and storms out of the store.

Once the garlic is out of the store, you instantly begin to breathe easier.  You notice that people are staring strangely at you, but you really couldn’t care less right now.  You have to make things right with Jake.

Quickly, you leave the store, a sense of calm coming over you once the nighttime air of the city washes over you, bathing you in its smoggy film and dampening the horrid garlic.  It isn’t hard to find Jake, who is huffing to himself and pacing away loudly.

“Baby, wait up!” you shout, dashing to catch up with him.

Jake doesn’t wait up.  In fact, he does the opposite, speeding up to no avail.  He’s easy to catch up to, though when you do, you instinctively recoil away from the garlic again.  

“Baby—this is ridiculous.  Can’t you take that off?” you attempt to ask again, forcing yourself not to recoil away from the garlic.

“I can, but I don’t want to!” he cries unreasonably.

You sigh, realizing that it’s pointless to argue with him.  Instead, you ask, “why are you so upset today?  Can you at least tell me that?”

“Because—because you are being SO unreasonable!” he exclaims.

You would laugh at the irony in that statement if you weren’t being attacked by the noxious garlic fumes.  “Why am I being unreasonable?” you prompt him further.

“Because ever since the whole Caliborn incident you’ve been treating me like a child! We used to share such amazing experiences together!  We would battle the foes from Derse and be a team! But now you don’t even want me outside at night anymore!”

“Is this about me wanting you to be safe?” you hazard a guess.

“Yes!”  he says angrily.  “Do you see how you’re being totally unreasonable?!”

No, you really don’t.  But you attempt to explain.  You have to make this right again. “I think you misunderstood me.  We fought low level demons together.  We sent harmless spirits back to Derse.  That’s different than demons of Caliborn’s caliber.  I—I worry about you baby.  I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

He spins around and faces you with bright intent in his emerald eyes.  “Dirk, I’ve climbed mountains. I’ve wrestled bears.  I’ve faced Caliborn before!  I’m not a weakling and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t treat me like one!”

“I wouldn’t want you to be my human if you were a weakling!” you respond, growing just a bit exasperated with this and more than irritated at that garlic.  It’s stinging your eyes and burning your skin, but you’ll deal with that later.  “Jake, I love that you’re strong. That you’re brave.  It takes at least that to deal with me.”

Jake is silent, finally.  He seems to be considering your words carefully.

“I love you Jake.  More than anything else in this entire fucking world,” you say, forcing calm into your voice.  “I want to be with you forever and—”

Jake stays silent, still taking in your words.

You growl quietly because you really can’t take it anymore.  That garlic!  You wince.  “Baby, can you please put that away?  It’s hurtin’ me.”

Jake finally seems to come to his senses again.  He gasps softly and finally nods.  “Ok, but no more treating me like a child,” he says, slipping the dreaded garlic necklace off and throwing it away in a nearby trash can.

The air still smells a little bit like garlic, but you can finally be close to him without feeling sick and in pain.  Quickly, you fly to his side and wrap him in a tight embrace.  “Thanks.  Please don’t ever push me away like that again.”

“Don’t treat me like an infant and I won’t!” Jake says, his words quiet despite his tone.  He takes a moment before he finally asks, “what—what did you mean when you said ‘my human’?”

You stiffen.  Shit, did you say that?  That’s not something you wanted to put in his head. “I’ll explain it to you later, promise.”

Jake gives you a LOOK and you know you’re not getting off the hook so easily.

“Being my human is— it’s a bond deeper than being boyfriends for my kind. Deeper than marriage.  There’s so much to bonding,” you explain quietly.  You see Jake’s eyes light up with happiness and it simultaneously fills your heart with joy and grief.  You want Jake to be your human so badly, but he still doesn’t understand the downfalls.  He doesn’t know what he would be giving up. “Easy, English. It’s not all sunshine and rainbows. There’s commitment involved, and sacrifice.”

“Well isn’t that true of any relationship?  I don’t see how this could possibly be much different!” he exclaims brightly.  “I think we should do this bonding thing.”

You want to tell him no, but he’s already leaning forward, looking at you with those brilliant emerald eyes that you absolutely love.  He’s grinning at you playfully and his tone is all too suggestive as he says, “I want to be your human Dirk.”

Jake surprises you by catching your lips in a kiss.  He leans into you and his expression becomes almost shy as he says, “I’m not sure if that involves sex, but I do imagine it should.”

Your boyfriend has quite the imagination.  He’s right; the bonding does involve sex.  And a bit more.

But you aren’t going to do that to him.  Not yet.  You haven’t even really had sex yet!  Since the Caliborn thing, you’ve barely touched Jake aside from kisses and a little groping his fine plush rump.  You haven’t wanted to scare him away.

Jake seems to sense your indecision and he huffs lightly.  “You’re not going to break me with a little physical contact, Dirk!  It’ll take more than that to do in this English!”  He chuckles and takes your hand in his, pulling you in the general direction of your home.  “So let’s—just go back to your place.  And see where things might possibly go from there, hmm?”

How can you say no to that?  You thread your fingers back through Jake’s as your boyfriend gallantly leads you home.

* * *

Sex with Jake.  You get the feeling it’s finally, finally, something that’s going to happen.

When you get home you both sit on the bed, gently kissing and tangling your fingers into each other’s hair.  Jake makes a small heated gasp when you gently tug at his hair.  When he opens his mouth, you deepen the kiss, allowing your tongues to slide along each other’s as you taste your boyfriend’s mouth, enjoying everything that is Jake.

You could kiss Jake all night, and indeed, you have before.  But as Jake’s hands start to move down your chest, you get warning vibes.  His hands hesitate when he reaches the bottom of your shirt.  For a minute or so, his fingers linger there, toying with the hem of your pants.  The minutes seem to drag on by for an eternity, because you’ve waited for this for what seems like forever.

You’ve waited decades to find your mate.  And once you found Jake, you waited until you were close enough to him that you could kiss each other like this.  And after the incident with Caliborn, you didn’t dare touch him first.  You’ve waited patiently for Jake to come to terms with this all on his own.  You put the ball in his court, because you won’t hurt your boyfriend. You love him far too much for that.

And it’s for that exact reason that you hesitate when his fingers finally move lower, brushing your arousal from above your pants.  Slowly, you pull away from the kiss and place your hand on top of his.  “Jake, are you sure you want this?”

He laughs lightly.  “Would my hand be on you if I didn’t?”

“I don’t want you to feel obligated,” you tell him carefully.  “I know you don’t have the best memories of this kind of thing. I don’t want to push you.”

Jake’s smile falters and he quietly says, “golly, you sure know how to get a guy in the mood.”

“I’m sorry,” you apologize quickly.  “Didn’t mean to bring up hurtful things.  I just care about you.  Don’t want you to feel like you’re making a mistake.”

“You’re not a mistake, Dirk,” Jake says firmly, punctuating that statement with a soft kiss.  “I already told you, you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me in my entire life.  Now stop being such a downer dunderhead and let me—let me just—”

You gasp as Jake slowly slides his hand beneath your pants, touching your dick directly.

Again, you look at him, gazing into his bright emerald eyes as you ask, “you sure baby?”

His hand stills and his whole body stiffens as he says, “Consarn it, YES Strider!  I thought we were past this! Enough treating me like an infant!”

You nod because yes, you did just talk about this.  About two minutes ago in fact.  Ok baby, I trust you,” you murmur, catching his lips in a loving kiss.

“And I trust YOU, Dirk,” he says, smiling and winking as he starts moving his hand again, making you gasp softly.

It’s not like you’ve never been touched there before.  You’ve had sex plenty of times.  But something is fundamentally different when Jake touches you.

That feeling is back again.  Knowing that Jake is your mate.  The one that you were meant to be with.   When Jake gently but firmly strokes you, there is a beautiful connection so powerful in its pleasure that it’s almost electric.  When he looks at you with lust and love behind his emerald eyes, you know that this is absolutely the right thing.  That meeting him and spending your time with him, flirting with him and loving him, was no coincidence.

Jake is your mate.  Jake is your fucking human mate, and there’s nothing you can do to change that.

Not that you would want to, because the way Jake is touching you has you curling in ever so slightly, trapping gasps and moans in the back of your throat because fuck, you can’t come apart just yet!

You lean in and kiss him gently, loving him and sensing his love for you through the wonderful tingling feeling when your lips meet.  And slowly, ever so gently, you rest your hand on top of his pants.

Jake’s hand on your dick pauses for a second, and you feel a rush of sensation run through him.  You don’t move anything other than your lips, which you keep gently caressing his own, letting him know it’s ok.  That you won’t do anything he doesn’t want you to do.

And then the moment passes.  Jake kisses you back passionately, taking his free hand and struggling to unbutton and unzip his pants.  You’re so filled with relief that you don’t even hesitate to help him out, pulling him free from his pants and stroking his arousal gently.

Jake gasps softly, leaning into you and holding onto your shoulder with his free hand, keeping your bodies close together.  Again, his other hand stills on your dick before he seems to remember himself and moves in time with you.

You’re not sure how long you both sit together, kissing and gently fondling each other’s dicks like two teenagers exploring their sexuality for the first time.  It’s beautiful in its own way, and this is truly more than you thought you’d ever have with Jake after learning about his history with Caliborn.  You’re certain that you’ll be able to live a happy and satisfied life as long as you can love Jake and show him that you love him with simple gestures like this.

Jake’s hand leaves your pants, and for just a moment you panic.  Did you do something wrong?  Was this too much for Jake after all?

But Jake surprises you again, and he quickly starts fumbling with your pants, trying to help you get out of them.  You know what he’s asking for, and you break your kiss so that you can look at him seriously in his emerald green eyes.  “Baby, you sure you want to go that far?  I’ll understand if—”

“For Christ’s sake, Strider, YES,” Jake whispers to you harshly.  “I’ve wanted this since you started visiting me in the coffee shop.  I know you want it too.”

It’s true, you do.

“I’ve seen the way you look at me.  I know you want this as much as I do, so please,” he continues, tugging again at your pants.  “Let’s stop beating around the bush and do it.”

You couldn’t agree more.  The next few seconds are a massive fumble to remove clothing, and your pants and shirts fly around the room, heedless to direction. When you’re both finally nude on the bed, you pull Jake down on top of you, kissing him lovingly as you lay back into the bed.

Jake is every bit as gorgeous nude as he is clothed.  Even more so, you’d say.  You take in your fucking beautiful boyfriend as he moves on top of you, pressing your dicks together skin on skin.  It’s hard not to mirror his soft moans of pleasure every time you rub so perfectly against each other.

But you know that this isn’t what Jake meant by “do it.”  Jake wants full out sex.  And you know exactly what needs to happen.

While you kiss and grind, you reach for the nightstand beside your bed, opening up the drawer and rummaging around until your fingers wrap around the tube of lube you always leave in there.  When Jake sees it, you feel his heartrate accelerate, excited but also a little frightened of what’s to come.

You pull him off you and rub him gently.  “Relax, baby.  This isn’t for you.  Not yet,” you murmur softly, uncapping the lube and spreading a generous amount on your fingers.  You don’t need this much, but you don’t want any chance of this hurting Jake.  You spread your legs and bring your coated fingers to your entrance, relaxing as you press them inside.

Jake finally understands, and you feel him ease up significantly, leaning against one of your knees as you work your fingers in and out of yourself, spreading the lube as deep as you can for your lover.

“So bloody beautiful, Dirk,” he murmurs softly as he watches you.  “Golly do I love you.”

It’s all the encouragement you need.  You squeeze out a bit more lube on your fingers, warming it up a bit before stroking Jake’s dick again, keeping him hard and enjoying his tiny pants of pleasure as you spread the lube all over his erection.

You don’t need to ask him again.  Jake is already moving as soon as your hand leaves him, fitting perfectly between your legs and slowly pressing himself inside you.

Being filled with Jake is even more wonderful than you ever suspected it might be.  Jake seems to know what to do with sex, or at least, how to move.  But it’s not his skill that has you hook line and sinker.

It’s because he’s your mate.  You’re finally having sex with your mate.

Who cares if he’s a human?  Jake English is the most perfect being you can imagine.  As you move against each other, bringing each other closer and closer to bliss, you kiss him again, your mind full of love.

Filled with the haze of your lovemaking, you don’t hesitate to kiss along Jake’s jaw until you reach his neck, licking him lovingly a few times.  You’ve been careful not to be around Jake while you’re hungry again.  Ever since that first time, you haven’t dared visit him before feeding.

You know when to hold yourself back.

You know when you shouldn’t bite him.

Now isn’t that time.

Your teeth are on Jake’s skin, pricking him and bring his perfect blood to your lips.  Jake moans louder as you lick the blood from his neck.  You’re completely in love with tasting him as he fucks you.

It’s beautiful and perfect.  Jake’s gasps become more frequent, and his movements become harsher and faster.  You can sense him coming close to completion.  You hold him closely, drinking from him as you move even more back against him, coaxing him towards his release.

“D-Dirk!!!” he cries softly as he comes inside you, holding you tightly as if you might fly away.

You growl lowly as he clenches around you, bringing you the rest of the way to completion.  Your mind is only on your mate as you come between your bodies, showing him just how perfect he makes you feel.

For several seconds, you don’t do anything.  You hold him as his breaths quiet down, and you force yourself to stop drinking from him, choosing to lick and heal his neck instead.  Gently, you run your fingers through his hair, well aware that once he comes down from this, he may not feel quite the same as when he insisted you go for it.

But it turns out you don’t have anything to worry about.  When Jake looks at you, there’s happiness and the most beautiful love behind his bright green eyes.  When he kisses you and says he loves you, you know that those words are completely true.

“Thank you,” Jake says softly.  “Thank you for trusting me.  I love you.”

You laugh softly, kissing him back lovingly.  “Thanks for trusting me.  I kinda bit you again.”

“I know,” he chuckles quietly.  “I loved it.  You can bite me every day if you want to, Dirk.”

You shiver against him, thinking of how perfect it would be to drink his perfect blood every day.  “Careful, I might take you up on that offer.”

He laughs again, seeming to sense your hesitation.  He flushes softly as he murmurs, “I hope you do.”

You pull him back closer to you and breathe him in, not believing the words you’re hearing.  “Fuck—how did I end up with someone so perfect?”

Jake smiles against your neck and murmurs, “I ask myself that every day.  Strider, all of this—I never imagined things could be so wonderful.  Today.  Every day.  You’ve given me—”

“Shut up right there, English,” you chuckle.  “You’re the one who’s given me everything.”

“Really?” he asks, pulling away just enough to face you with a forced stern look.  “Really, you’re telling me to shut up right after we had sex for the first time?  You better watch out, or I’ll have my revenge on you again!”

You pale a bit despite yourself.  “No baby.  Anything but the revenge.  Your idea of revenge is dangerous.”

Jake grins, proud of himself.  “I knew you’d hate it!”

Your eyes narrow at him as you slowly ask, “you liked that, didn’t you?  Giving me shitty coffee.”

“It was innovative and unique!” he professes.

“You gave me shitty coffee,” you say flatly.

“You gave me a reason to give you shitty coffee!” he exclaims, then sighs.  “Look, let’s not think about this right now.  Let’s just cuddle and never again think about reasons for the revenge.”

You’re more than happy to oblige him.  As you wrap both of you up in your blankets, you’re happier than you’ve ever been.  You’ve found your mate, and he’s accepted you.  Whatever the future holds, you can take.

And if all of Jake’s revenges end like this, you’ll have to give him more reasons to be upset with you.

You can’t help smirking as you both drift off into a happy slumber.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will this be the last time Jake has his revenge? Who can say? =)
> 
> Two delightful songs for you, to make up for not having one in chapter 3!   
> [Dangerous, by Big Data](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPYA9racfO4)  
> [Long Way Down, by Robert Delong](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-ZDBddRXFA)


	6. Destined Person

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sometimes when this place gets kind of empty,  
> Sound of their breath fades with the light.  
> I think about the loveless fascination  
> Under the milky way tonight."--["Under the Milky Way" ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mA54NBtPKdI)by The Church

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update Thursday!

You're Jake English, and you actually have the day off. Of course you still _tried_ to work for Nepeta, but she said she needs the hours this week, and you asked John but then he just shoved you away and told you to actually relax like a normal person and here you are. They just don't understand that you have to make more money! But with your free time, you can at least accomplish a little bit of research. 

Your mind is still reeling from all the recent activities with Dirk. He really does love you, doesn't he? It's a little hard to comprehend, but you  _know_ he does. It isn't even that he's said so, though he has said so  _many_ times. It's a feeling you get from him that you can't explain. Like you mean everything to him. And though that makes you overwhelmingly happy, it also scares the shit out of you. 

And honestly, you don't know all that much about him! He won't talk about his childhood in more than a few mumbled words, he doesn't remember much about Derse, he won't mention Dave other than to call him names, and he still seems unwilling to discuss the whole vampire thing with you. Like he thinks you'll wise up and ditch him once you realize what it means. In all honesty, you really couldn't give less of a flying frick whether he drinks your blood. It feels great and he never takes enough to hurt you. You really like feeling that close to him, and you know he likes it too, even if it's a guilty pleasure on his part. 

Still though, there  _is_ a way you can at least learn a little bit about him. You're at home today because even while you're off, you're incapable of sitting still and doing nothing. Dirk is still in his bed asleep, hiding from the sun, but you left early in the morning to soak it up! You love the sun! Of course your tan skin proves as much but you really feel like you could write sonnets about the sunlight if you were a poetic person! 

Once you arrived home you found your grandmother at the stove, cooking some pancakes.

“Jakey! I didn't expect you this morning! You're off work?” she asks you after she kisses your forehead. 

“Yes, for once! Though I'd rather be there,” you tell her. 

“Oh, hush! You work too much as it is. You want some pancakes?”

“Yes, please!” you chirp happily. She kisses you again and then sets to work.

“Your boyfriend didn't have plans to spend time with you today?” she asks before you can leave the kitchen. You blush and make it a point not to look at her.

“Erm—yes he does but later! He has to work today! Dirk is always working!” 

That's such a lie, Dirk rarely works and when he does it's always to vanquish some sort of evil and it takes him less than an hour to do so. If anything he spends more time sleeping than anything else. He's actually pretty lazy. 

“Oh? Well at least you can see him later. When am I going to meet this special fellow that has your head in the clouds?” 

“Soon, I promise! I'll see if I can't arrange a meeting!” You hurriedly scurry out of the kitchen.

She doesn't exactly  _know_ you're dating a demon. Your grandmother knows all about Derse, and she knows that not all of the inhabitants are wicked. But she also would be worried about you if she knew you were in love with one of them, and you'd rather not make her worry for nothing. You plan on waiting a little longer, maybe after her health improves before you introduce them. Plus, the longer you're with him, the more impressed she'll be at how he treats you! 

You have the best ideas ever. 

As the pleasant smell of pancakes wafts from the kitchen, you move to the bookcase and pull out one of your grandmother's large books on the demons of Derse. You flip through the pages until you reach the section of vampires. 

Nothing too upsetting. Dirk needs blood, can't be in the sun, hates garlic... It doesn't say anything you didn't already know. But then something catches your eye. Underneath one of the artistic renderings of a vampire guarding another one from an enemy, there is some small print that says  _“a vampire will go through drastic and even self destructive measures to protect their mates”._

You stare at the inked drawing of the vampires, your stomach slowly falling to your feet. You can't ever be Dirk's mate, can you? You aren't like him. He didn't say you were his mate, he said you were his human. And you aren't even that yet, are you? You're his human boyfriend. And normally, you'd be fine with that, because that's how things are supposed to work. Boyfriends first, then later on something more. That's the  _human_ way. But Dirk...Dirk isn't human. And one day he'll find his mate, and once that happens...

You put the book back and you move to the kitchen table as your grandmother puts your pancakes down for you, as well as a glass of milk. She also ruffles your hair and pinches your cheek, and you swat at her.

“Gramma! I'm twenty-three years old!” you laugh, and she glares at you.

“Jacob English!” she says in her 'stern' voice. “Have you forgotten the date?!”

You blink up at her innocently. “Um...no? It's November—“

“It's _December 1_ _st_ _!_ ” she waggles her finger at you. “It's your birthday, young man! Did you forget _why_ you're off today? You promised to at least relax on your birthday!” 

You stare at your plate and frown. “I...I guess I've just been so wrapped up in other things...”

“Jake,” she sighs, sitting across from you and starting to eat her own pancakes. “You're _only_ twenty-four. Stop worrying so much about _me_ , okay? I know why you're working so much, and I appreciate your help but at the same time I'm worried you're doing too much for _me_ and not enough for yourself.”

“But your surgery won't pay for itself!” you say adamantly. “And I don't mind! You've taken care of me my whole life, so...so I can do the same!”

She sighs and shakes her head at you. “I'm not going to argue with you on your birthday,” she says. “But you're going to start worrying about yourself more than me. Promise me, Jake!” She points at you. “You promise me or I'll cast a spell on you to turn your fingers into worms!” 

“I stopped believing that years ago!” you say, but you still promise her. You don't think you could do much with worm fingers. And you really don't put it past her. 

After a few moments of silence, she looks at you again. “What else is bothering you?”

You start to say nothing, but she'll know better. She always does. So instead you look at her and swallow thickly before saying, “is it possible for a human to turn into a vampire?”

She blinks and furrows her eyebrows at you. “What? Why is that worrying you?”

You still don't want to tell her about Dirk just yet, so hurriedly you think of something else to say. 

“It's just that we have this vampire customer who comes in sometimes and he—he's really annoying and keeps saying he'll change me into one of them if I mess his coffee up. I mean, I _think_ he's kidding, but...one can never be too sure.”

She still eyes you suspiciously, but she turns back to her breakfast at least. 

“It's impossible for a human to turn into a demon, Jake. Even a vampire. I doubt you have anything to worry about.”

“Yes, but what about all that old folklore about a vampire's bite?” you ask somewhat hopefully. “Even then it's impossible?”

“A vampire's bite doesn't do anything more to a human than a tick's bite would, though I've been told it _feels_ much better. All that old folklore was just that, _folklore_. Even a _werewolf's_ bite wouldn't turn you into one of them. Werewolves and vampires are _born_ werewolves and vampires. That's just the way it's always been.” 

“So I guess they wouldn't even bother mating with a human then, would they?” you ask as nonchalantly as you can. She laughs.

“Not unless you want to be labeled a cradle robber for life! You'd age eventually, and they'd always look young.” She pinches your cheek again, laughing at you more. “Twenty-four and still worried about such silly things. A demon isn't going to mate with you, honey. You're right, it wouldn't make a lick of sense!” 

You force yourself to laugh, but it just hurts because she doesn't know you're worried about the opposite. You  _want_ Dirk to mate with you. You want to be  _his,_ just as much as another demon could be. What's the point of even staying in this silly thing with him if he's just going to leave you for another demon as soon as he meets the right one? 

You finish your breakfast, and then you help out with a few chores as you think about what you need to do. 

***

As the sun starts to go down, you make the trek back to Dirk's house. He's given you a key, and he doesn't know you're off work tonight since you were planning on trying to swap with someone. You'd hate for him to go all the way to the shop only to find you aren't there. So instead you slip inside and close the door behind you. Before you can even take a few steps, you feel a strong pair of arms around your waist, pulling you backwards.

“Mmmm, _baby_ ,” he says lowly in your ear, hugging you to him. “Off tonight?” 

“Oh, yeah. I sort of forgot it's my birthday, so everyone forced me,” you say softly as you turn around and hug him properly. He stares at you.

“It's your birthday? And you didn't tell me?” 

“I didn't know! It's been—been busy and I've been thinking about other things and...and I meant to pick up a shift today but no one would swap with me!” 

“Well, good. You shouldn't work so hard anyways, it's not good for you.” He pulls you into a kiss. “Birthday, hmm? Can I give you my present now?”

“How did you get me a present if you didn't even know it was my birthday?” you laugh. But then he presses his hips into yours and grinds against you, slow and sweet, and your knees turn to jelly as you meld against him. “Ahh...guess...guess I can get it now...” you manage as you practically climb on top of him. 

You decide you can just talk to him about your concerns later, when he isn't trying to be sweet for your birthday. 

***

Except it doesn't work out that way at all.

It's December  _20_ _th_ and you still haven't spoke to him about it. It's so close to Christmas and your grandmother is  _insisting_ you bring him to dinner and you're no step closer to discussing the issue of mating with him. And something else bothering you, as simplistic as it may be, is that every time you've had sex with him,  _you've_ been on top. 

It's not that you don't enjoy it! That's not the issue at all! It's just... Does he not want to be inside of  _you_ that way? Is he still thinking of who had you before? Does that... _disgust_ him? 

You don't know much about demon culture but one bit of it you're  _extremely_ familiar with is that you still technically belong to Caliborn until Dirk claims you in the same way. You don't care much for those sorts of thoughts, and you  _especially_ don't care for the thought of belonging to Caliborn. But the fact remains that in their primal demon terms, you're Caliborn's. And you know Dirk has to know that.

So why won't he claim you?

It's because of all these unsettling thoughts that you're a little grumpy and very grateful it's almost time to go home. Or to Dirk's, at least. You've started thinking of it as home, since you're so comfortable there and he insists on you always staying with him. 

You look up as the door jingles and a man in a hood walks in the shop. You start to greet him, but it dies in your throat as you recognize the mischievous smile revealed as the hood is lowered.

“David?” you ask as Dirk's brother steps up to the counter.

“Just 'Dave', dude,” he says. He scans the menu and then he looks behind him, realizing no one else is in the shop. Then he leans on the counter and gives you a look, obviously sizing you up. 

“I mean, you're cute. Like, _really_ cute,” he says, cocking his head to the side. “But other than that I ain't seein' it.”

“I beg your pardon?” you ask. 

“What Dirk sees in you.”

You start to feel a little hot under the collar because you've been wondering the same thing.

“Are you going to order something? You can't just bum around the store, you know,” you tell him coolly, an edge to your voice. He grins smugly at you.

“Seems I struck a nerve,” he shrugs. “Yeah get me a...uh. Caramel thing.”

“Caramel thing? A macchiato?”

“Yeah, a caramel Ralph Macchio.” 

You roll your eyes at him, but turn to make his drink. You hand it to him and he sips it curiously before guzzling it down. 

“Aw, sweet. Who knew fancy coffee was tasty? Get me another of those, kay? And like, put extra caramel stuff in it, that was bomb.” 

You huff at him but still turn to do as he said since it's your job. After you accept his card for payment, you expect him to be on his merry way. 

He doesn't leave.

Instead he leans back on the counter and eyes you as he sips his coffee daintily. Finally, you snap.

“What in blazes do you _want_?!”

“Just to chill with you, bro, can't you sense us chillin'?” he says easily.

“I do not feel very _chill!_ ” you hiss at him. “You think I don't already know your brother is too good for me? I do, alright? I've been racking my brains every night trying to figure out why he bothers with me when he's probably just going to find his actual mate somewhere down the road, but I can't think of a reason any more than you can! So if you're just here to rub that in my face you can take that coffee cup and shove it right up—!”

He laughs so loudly that it covers up your little rant, and you flush as you realize he's laughing at your expense. 

“Okay, yeah, I see it now,” he croaks as he straightens back up. “Calm down, dude, I'm not here to tell you all the reasons y'all shouldn't be together.”

“You're not?” You blink confusedly. “Then why did you come here?”

He grins again. “For coffee. And to give you a little playin' field damage in the whole game. See, I know he's got you all wrapped around the idea that he's mysterious and stuff, 'cause he's a loser like that. And I'm sure you're one of those people who think all the movie shit is true about us—“ 

“I don't think it's _all_ true. I know a lot of it is. Though I doubt either of you two sparkle in the sunlight,” you snicker.

“Fuck no, we'd burn and fry. Got burned _once_. That was enough to learn my lesson. I'd sooner set myself on fire than do all that bullshit again.”

“I also know there's no way for me to be like you. A bite won't change anything,” you add a little wistfully. He rubs the back of his neck, looking uncomfortable. 

“I mean, you could get all bent outta shape about that _or_ you could listen to these totally dope things I have to tell you that'll even the playin' field a little bit, it's up to you.”

“What sorts of things?” you ask curiously. 

“I'm sure Dirk didn't tell you his hair is actually bright purple?” 

“It is _not!_ ” You laugh at the thought! Dave leans closer.

“Man, I'm _tellin'_ you. All vampires have purple hair. We dye it 'cause purple stands out too much, you dig? And Dirk had this idea when we were kids that we could pull off the whole blond look, so here we are. His hair's totally purple.”

You think about it a little more, and decide it's probably true. Why would Dave lie to you? You can't think of one reason!

“What else?” you ask eagerly. 

“Okay so when we were younger he had this imaginary friend named Colonel Octopus and the fuckin' octopus demanded to have a tea party every day at noon. We weren't even conscious at noon, I dunno what the fuck Dirk was thinkin'.”

You giggle into your hand and imagine a tiny Dirk having an imaginary friend. 

“And he's terrified of puddles,” Dave tells you seriously, definitely seeming to enjoy all the attention he's receiving. “He just screams and cries every time it rains. It's a tragic thing.”

“David, you're jesting with me!” you laugh loudly, almost falling over yourself. You can hear the sound of Dave's laughter ringing in with yours, and then the _actual_ ring of the bell signaling a new customer.

“Dave, what the _fuck_?” 

Both you and Dave fall silent when Dirk walks in the store. In an instant, he's beside the counter,  _glaring_ at his little brother.

“Why are you _here_? You came when the sun was up so I wouldn't be here? Dude, _what the fuck?!_ ” 

Dave shrugs and says, “hey man, just wanted to speak to your mate or whatever. Y'know, since I'm never introduced. And I kinda like this one, he's funny.”

Dave likes you! It's probably not the best time to get excited, but you were so worried he hated you. This is outstanding news!

And did he call you Dirk's mate? 

“See ya, English,” Dave says, waggling his eyebrows at you. Next thing you know, he's out the door and Dirk is growling under his breath.

“That _shit_. That stupid selfish _fuck_.” He turns to you. “Whatever he told you is all lies. All of it. If there's even a bit you _think_ might be true, it's not. I swear on my life it's not.”

“So you aren't afraid of puddles?” You ask somewhat mournfully. You thought the idea was cute! He snorts.

“Only if my hair gets wet, I guess,” he says. 

“And is your hair really purple?” 

“Nah, but that'd be kinda cool.”

You pout. “I thought we were sharing valuable information! But did you hear him? He said he liked me! Isn't that good news?”

“Long as you think so, baby,” he says easily. “You almost ready to go?”

“Oh, yes! Let me just clock out...” You hurry to do so as soon as John walks in to replace you. 

As you walk alongside Dirk, your stomach is churning. There are so many thoughts in your head and almost none of them are good. You almost jump out of your skin when Dirk's fingers wrap around yours. 

“What is it, Jake? I've been feelin' you think thoughts like that for weeks now. You wanna tell me what's wrong?” Dirk asks softly. You look down. 

“I...I have a lot of things I'm concerned about...” you respond. 

“You don't wanna talk to me about them?” he asks, looking at you. 

“I _do_ but...I'm scared of what the answers will be.”

He doesn't respond, but you can see his eyebrows furrowing over his shades and you wonder what he's thinking. If only he  _was_ a mind reader like one of those silly fictitious vampires, your life would be so much easier. You aren't the best at saying how you feel, and you know well enough that Dirk isn't either. You also know you'll never move past it if you don't talk about it. Even if this is the end of the road for your relationship, it's better than never knowing. 

You decide to start out small. 

“Gramma wants you to come have Christmas dinner with us,” you tell him. His head snaps toward you like he was hoping you'd break the uneasy silence that had descended over the pair of you.

“That's cool. As long as she doesn't expect me to eat, I'd love to meet her,” he says, squeezing your fingers encouragingly. You nod and swallow thickly before continuing. 

“But...but I don't want you to meet her if...if this isn't a permanent thing.”

He stops walking. 

“Jake...what are you trying to say? Are you...are you breaking up with me?” He sounds so distraught that it hurts you, and you quickly shake your head frantically. 

“It's just that I can't ever be like you, Dirk! There's no way at all to make me like you, it's impossible! And I...I knew that all along but I didn't know there was...this _destined_ person for you out there and that person can't be me because I'm not going to live that long! I could die _tomorrow_ of some easy and obscure thing because I'm just a _human_ and I—I can't ever be your _mate!_ ” You try to gather your breath but it's hard when you've been playing these same words in your head for _weeks_. “Is that...is that why you won't claim me? Because you know you'll find your mate one day?”

He hugs you so tightly it  _hurts_ a little, but you cling to him just as hard in return because you  _need_ it. For a long time, he doesn't say anything, just holds you and pets your hair, and you're calmed by his scent like always. Dirk just smells so  _good_ . You can't explain it. 

“Don't _ever_ think those kind of thoughts, baby...” He says quietly in your ear. “None of that is true.”

“It is!” You pull away from him and look up fretfully. “I know I _can't_ be like you, Dirk!” 

“I know you can't, too.” He cups your cheek. “Jake, that doesn't mean—“ He trails off and seems to be having trouble on how to word this. With a frustrated growl, he continues. “You _are_ my mate.”

“But...but that's impossible...” You say stubbornly, not ready to believe that. 

“It is.” He nods. “I don't get it either, to be honest with you. And it took me a long time to come to terms with it, because it doesn't make sense. But my kind—we just _know_ when we've found our mates. And I know it's you. I kinda just thought we could figure it out as we went.”

You sniffle and wipe under your eyes, relieved to see your tears never actually fell. 

“Then why won't you make me _yours_?” you ask him almost inaudibly. He stiffens against you. “Is it because of Caliborn?”

“ _Jake_ , no—“

“Then why! You've said it enough times now and I—I love you! You know that! And I understand you've wanted to take things slow for my benefit but I _want_ that bond with you! I want to be your—your human! Your mate! I want to know this won't end when you come to your senses!” You look tearfully up at him, grumbling a bit as you feel one fall down your cheek. “If you don't want that, I understand. I don't want to manipulate you into anything, I just...I want to _know_ that you want me the same as I want you!That you don't think I'm _ruined_ because of what Caliborn did to me!” 

“I _do_ want you to be my human! I— _fuck!_ ” He throws his hands up and seems to be in the throes of a tantrum of some sort before he turns back to you and pulls you against his chest again. “I want it so bad it _hurts_ , Jake, but...”

“Please...” You say softly, hugging him back. “I want that, too...”

He snarls in his frustration and pulls you up into his arms. The next thing you know, you're zooming through the city, faster than ever before. He holds you carefully as he jumps over benches and moves fast enough where he probably looks like a blur to anyone who happens to see him. In no time at all you're at his house again as he unlocks the door hurriedly, fumbling the keys in his rush to get inside. You squeal as he zooms down the stairs and into his basement bedroom, your stomach feeling like it was left on the sidewalk somewhere from all these sudden motions. 

You gasp as your back is pressed against his cool sheets and he hovers over you, his expression torn.

“I _want_ you...” he says so vehemently that it sounds like an insult. “Are you _sure_ you...you want to be mine like this? We can stay the way we are, Jake, I don't need anything...”

“But I think _I_ need it...” you tell him gently, pulling him into a simple kiss. “As long as it's what you want as well, I...I don't see why we couldn't try to do this the right way?”

“Jake...” he sighs against your lips and you don't hesitate to let him deepen the kiss. But then he pulls away and nuzzles into your neck instead, licking and sucking on your skin in the most tantalizing way. You gasp and it turns into a choked moan as he bites down, drinking your blood. 

He's done this plenty of times, gotten really worked up and then bitten you to drink your blood. But something about this feels...so different... It feels as though he's taking something from you, some part of yourself that you can't explain and making it  _his_ . It doesn't feel bad it just...doesn't seem right...you don't want to give him yourself if you can't have him in return.

“Jake...” he murmurs, “you need to trust me, okay?”

“I do,” you say without hesitation. He snorts and then he slices into his neck with his fingernail as easily as if he were using a knife. Your stomach churns as the blood flows from the slit, and you instinctively try and move away from him. 

“Drink,” he says, pulling your head to his neck. You whine and try to jerk away. You aren't a vampire! You don't want blood! “Jake, you said you'd trust me.”

You cringe and close your eyes as your lips make contact with the open wound. And then it hits your tongue and...oh.

_Oh_ .

You moan softly and open your mouth wide, pulling his blood into your mouth greedily as he returns to your neck. He tastes so good! Nothing like your own blood when you accidentally bite your tongue with your oversized teeth. He purrs in your ear as you share each other's blood, and that pulling sensation from inside returns, but it's not leaving you with a hollow feeling this time. You can  _feel_ Dirk's soul filling the gaps as you drink his blood, can feel his  _is_ giving himself to you this time. You feel his tongue lapping at your neck and closing his own bite but you  _can't_ _stop_ drinking. 

“Jake...” he moans in your ear, his hips acquainting with yours. You can't handle him pressing against you with his blood in your mouth—it feels so _intimate_. More so than you can comprehend. “Jake, can't give you anymore, baby. Gotta let go, okay?”

“Noooo...no please...need more, Dirk...” But you can already feel his wound closing on its own, his hyper healing a nuisance as it stops you from drinking anymore. You try to bite back in but your measly human teeth won't do diddly squat! You growl in frustration and pout up at him. “That's not fair!”

“Heh, I'm flattered you think I taste so good,” he grins, kissing you lovingly as he moves his hips against yours again, turning you into a blissful mess on the bed. “Want you, baby...”

“Is it done... The bonding?” you ask dazedly, thrusting up against him as you seek more friction.

“Mm-hmm. It's already done,” he says fondly.

“But I don't feel any different...”

“You won't just yet. It'll come in time.”

“Oh...” You wrap around him and keep your bodies moving together. “Dirk...want you inside...”

As always, he freezes.

“I don't think—“

“I don't ruddy well care what you think!” you hiss. “You said you wanted to— _I_ want you to! Give me one good reason you can't! If it's not the Caliborn thing—“

“It _is_ the Caliborn thing, but not because I think anything less of you!” he grumbles. “I don't ever wanna hurt you like that, Jake! I'm not human! I don't—I don't want to even get the _opportunity_ to hurt you!”

“ _Dirk_ ,” you huff exasperatedly, “I'm not going to break. He was _trying_ to hurt me, he got off on that. And I don't want to talk about him! I want _you!_ I want _you_ to claim me!” 

And then the strangest thing happens. His orange eyes flash at you, and he growls a bit as he thrusts against you again.

“Mmm... _baby_ ,” he purrs, his fingers moving to your jeans. “Want—rrrgh!” He growls again. “I _can't_. Can't hurt you...”

“Dirk Strider, I _demand_ that you fuck me this instant!” you say, completely outraged that it's come to this point. He's ridiculous! Your... _mate_ is ridiculous! He's so stupid and you hate him!

His eyes flash again and it seems harder for him to snap out of the odd trance your demand puts him in this time. He opens his mouth to argue again.

“Fuck me! Consarnit, Strider, if you want to do it then do it! You have my _consent_ , you stupid buffoon!” 

He rips your jeans open, the button flying in an unknown direction. You start to yell at him for that because  _your jeans!_ —but then his tongue is down your throat and his hands are pulling the remains of your pants off, shredding the parts that offer resistance. You whine as he does the same to your boxers. You really liked those boxers! They were silky! You're stealing a pair of his to make up for it, it's only fair. 

You whimper as he spreads your legs and settles between them. He doesn't rip  _his_ clothes to get them off! He just slides them off like a normal person! He's such a jerk! You start to tell him so but then...oh...he's stroking both of you in his hand and it feels so good you  _can't_ say  _anything_ aside from his name.

“ _Dirk...”_ You pull him into another desperate kiss and try to distract yourself as he reaches for the bedside table. You know exactly what he's doing, since you're the one that tossed the lube there last time. As soon as his cold, slicked fingers brush between your legs, you flinch so drastically he immediately pulls away.

“Jake, I can't. I can't do this to you, your heart is already going haywire.” He kisses your nose. “I don't know what you're trying to prove, but I really don't mind putting this off until you aren't so...so scared.”

You shake your head. “I'm always going to be scared of it until we get it over with! Just—just go  _slowly_ . And for god's sake, stop treating me like an infant!” 

He narrows his eyes at you and starts to pull away from you entirely, obviously not listening to what you're saying. You cling to him.

“Until you claim me, I'm still technically Caliborn's in your silly demon terms!” You tighten around him. “Please— _please_ , Dirk! I _want_ you to, I just...I just need a minute!” 

“Silly demon terms,” he snorts, but he stays right where he is. “You know I don't go by that bullshit. I'm not even living in Derse with the other demons.”

“You _do_ go by it, it's _instinctual!_ Even _I_ know that, and I'm a human!” You pull his forehead to yours and try to calm down. “Just—just put one finger in, alright?”

You can feel him shifting around, and you tense again when you feel his finger pressing against you. You nod and whine softly when he presses it inside of you, slowly until it's all the way in. 

“Good...that's good just...just stay like this for a moment, please?” Your voice is shaky and he makes a small noise before he peppers your face in kisses.

“Never wanna hurt you...” he says softly.

“I know you won't. We wouldn't be here if I thought you would.” You take a deep breath and give him the go ahead.

It's slow,  _unbearably_ slow. He pulls his finger out gently and presses it back inside at a snail's pace until he gradually picks up speed. You moan encouragingly and rock against his hand.

“Another one,” you say, and he's quick to do exactly as you tell him this time, no arguments. He must sense that you're serious about this now, in control of your own body. 

And that's just it, isn't it?  _You're_ in control. While Dirk is doing this to you, you can tell him to stop at any time and you know he will. He doesn't want to hurt you. He doesn't want to  _violate_ you. He wants you to enjoy this. He wants to  _make love to you_ . And you've never been made love to before. You've never been treated like you mattered so much to anyone. Well, save for John when he would cuddle up to you after a nightmare, but that's a different story. 

Dirk  _loves_ you, and he's not going anywhere, whether you give yourself to him like this or not. You're  _his_ . And he's  _yours_ . 

You wrap your legs around his waist and pull his mouth to yours again as he pumps his fingers in and out of your body. When he finds that spot inside of you that makes you come undone, you cling to him and beg for him, but he merely adds another finger, moving them harder and faster into you.

“Please...Dirk, _please_...”

“You sure?” He looks completely _wrecked_ , his eyes black with want and his lips red from kissing you. 

“Please...I need you...”

He nods and pulls away from you long enough to slick himself up. You can hear him whining in the back of his throat as he prepares himself—it's the only attention he's really gotten since the two of you started this whole thing. 

Slowly, he pushes inside, and both of you share the same shaky groan as your bodies come together. Something inside of you feels complete with him like this. Something is telling you you'll never be as complete as you are when both of you are together. Is it your new bond?

You don't get a chance to think about it too much.

You cry out in pleasure as he moves, his hips snapping forward into yours. He looks at you with his hazy eyes and grins before he sets a rhythm, holding your hips as he pulls you down onto himself. You're having trouble remembering how to breathe—it's never felt this  _intense_ before. Even all the times you had him, it was never like this. You know this has to be because of your bond but you can't comprehend all the feelings building up. And in the back of your mind there's that nagging fear saying you're letting him inside of you, and he's going to know you're  _ruined_ but the rest of you  _doesn't care_ because you know you're being irrational and— _fuck this feels so good._

And finally, it builds up until you're screaming for him as you come, your body clenching around his until he joins you. And that same feeling deep inside is saying you're _complete_ now that the two of you just solidified your new bond with your bodies.

“ _Mine,”_ Dirk growls in your ear.

And then you...pause. Caliborn used to say that. It's a possessive ownership, and you always hated it before. Demons and their crazy rules. But with Caliborn, you knew you didn't have a choice but to let him think he owned you. If you fought against it, he would hurt you, and you were too much of a coward to fight for long. 

This is  _different_ . Dirk is, as always, giving you a choice. And that's why...

“Yours,” you say in return, pulling him in for a kiss. He smiles against your lips and licks inside your mouth, holding your face to his. But then he freezes and pulls away again.

“Jake...” he says softly, wiping your face. It's only when you register the moisture on his fingers that you know you're crying. “Did—did I hurt you? Baby, I'm so sorry—“

“Y-you didn't...” you warble pitifully, immediately pulling him back to you. “I'm j-just...just overwhelmed and...so _happy_... I'm sorry...”

“Don't apologize for being happy, you moron,” he says fondly, kissing your forehead. 

“ _You're_ a moron!” you bristle, swatting him. He grins and tries to flatten you to the bed, and you wrestle him away, both of you laughing like two equally idiotic buffoons. 

You know something very significant changed between the two of you tonight, and you also know you've never been happier for it. 

*** 

All of a sudden, for no foreseeable reason, you're Dave Strider. Leaving the two lovebirds to their bullshit, you're moving back to the coffee shop. Just because English isn't there to harass doesn't mean you can't go get another caramel thing. After all, you've been picking up a lot of the slack on demon fighting since Dirk is playing house husband with a human. You could use the extra caffeine, even if it won't be as strong for you as it would be to a human.

You step in the shop and move to the counter, looking around. It's like a ghost town in here. Are they almost closed or something? Speaking of, there's no one to take your order. What the fuck, what about customer service? You lean on the counter and clear your throat.

“Uh, yeah, I've got money to spend on coffee but if no one's here for that, I'll just go buy a coffee machine or somethin'. It's probably a better investment anyway.”

“No, wait!” A voice calls from the back. It sounds like Jake, so you're confused. Didn't Jake leave hours ago? Someone who looks _remarkably_ like Jake scurries from the back to the front counter, but you can see he's _not_ Jake. He smells different. And looks different, upon further inspection. You frown and cock your head to the side.

“Sorry,” the dude says. “I was sort of watching a YouTube video of this comedian on my phone and didn't hear you come in. What'd you want?”

“A caramel thingy.” 

“Thingy?”

“You are like, the _worst_ barista. Jake knew what I meant on the first try.”

“Well, I'm not Jake! And I don't think anyone normal would know what that means.”

“Whoa, wait, you're badmouthing Jake? I like to badmouth, lemme get in on this. Dude's like a two year old but with a nice ass.”

“Yeah! Wait...what?”

You snicker at the guy. He's really cute, actually. He has this kind of windswept hair that looks like a rat's nest, but a tidy rat's nest. And his eyes are this electric blue color that kind of makes your heart feel like beating. Which is weird. You've never felt like this before. Must be all the coffee.

“So...” The guy looks between you and the menu. “A caramel thing?”

“Look, forget the caramel thing, I think I've had enough coffee.” You scrutinize him from behind your shades. Why does he _smell so good_ , goddammit, you can't _think_. 

“I mean, I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life, but you're in a coffeehouse. The whole point of being here is usually to get coffee. Or to soak up the Wi-Fi.” 

“Yeah, cool—hey, so who are you and why do you look like the guy my bro is dating?” 

“Oh, you're _Dirk's_ brother? Yeah, I guess I can see that now. You guys look alike.”

“Lies and slander, but I'll forgive you if you answer my original question.”

“Yeah, sorry. I'm John, I'm Jake's cousin.”

You frown some more at him, enough to where he seems confused by what you want. To be honest, you're not even sure what you want. More of this guy, that's for sure.

John. What even kind of name is that. He's so stupid. 

“And...you are?” he trails off.

“I'm Dave.”

“Oh, cool. And I think you're just here to take up space?” 

“I am pretty damn good at that.” 

He nods. “So is it okay for me to finish watching my video? You won't report me, right?” he grins at you and shit. Fuck, shit,  _shit_ , you are  _sunk_ . You shake your head, swallowing thickly. 

“Nah, go right ahead. Who is it, anyway?”

“Aziz Ansari. Guy's hilarious. I started watching one of his older acts on Netflix last night and I never got to finish it, so here we are.” He moves around the counter and plops in one of the seats, looking at you expectantly. “Wanna see?”

And to be honest, you've seen this exact act a zillion times. You pretty much think Aziz Ansari is a god among humans. But you still nod and sit next to the guy. To  _John_ . And being closer to him is the worst thing ever because now you can smell him more and he smells  _good_ but not just because you want to bite him. You  _do_ kind of want to bite him, but you don't  _just_ want to bite him.

You don't know what you want. 

He laughs loudly at some joke you totally missed and you see the way his teeth protrude just slightly over his lip and you sink further and further into the seat because you're pretty damn sure you know what all of this means and you're not liking one damn bit of it. 

You don't get to make fun of Dirk for liking Jake anymore. And the world is just really fucking unfair. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has all basically built up for now and I consider this chapter to be the actual beginning of the story? Stuff will start happening now that's not just about the developing relationships and I'm excited to write it! 
> 
> Questions? Comments? FANART?! 
> 
> [Sachi](http://sachi-sama.tumblr.com/) and [Lateniteslacker!](http://lateniteslacker.tumblr.com/)


	7. Bro Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Promise I will be forever yours  
> Promise not to say another word  
> Nevermind whats done is done  
> Always was a lucky one
> 
> -Foo Fighters ["Still"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6A4wcehgKjA)

You are Dirk Strider, and you have no idea what the fuck is going on.  But something is pulling ferociously at you from inside, like a tight rubber band about to snap.

It’s burning. It NEEDS you.

You sit up in bed and look blearily around you.  

Jake.  Where the fuck is Jake?!

He needs you.  You’re not sure how you know, but you do.

Jake needs you.

Your mate needs you.

For the first time in your life, you forsake taking a shower in the morning and go straight to pulling on your clothes.

Wait. Fuck. Morning?

Why are you up in the fucking morning?!  Morning means sunlight.

But you don’t think about that too much, because the pain is only getting worse.  The pulling is turning into tearing.  It’s shearing at you and you know that you have to move fast. Because if you’re feeling this, then Jake’s feeling it too.  You can’t leave Jake like this!

Quickly, you throw on a large black cloak complete with a deep hood that you had designed for your use in the daytime, should you ever need to go outside.  It’s full of zippers, and complete with your matching black gloves.  You feel like a member of Organization 13.  Or Blade.

But of course, you don’t have time to really think these thoughts.  You’ve got to get to Jake.  You’re pulling on your gloves and your usual shades as you run to your garage and start up your sick tricked out car.

You’d take the time to admire your handiwork more if the pain wasn’t ripping you apart so badly.  You designed and made the car yourself, installing cameras all over the car to record the world outside and replacing the windows with the equivalent of flat computer screens.  You see the world outside, but it doesn’t see you.  While you’re inside your car, the sun won’t be able to burn you.  It’s one of your biggest prides, but you don’t have time to think about it right now.

You have to get to Jake.

You tear through the streets and make your way to the coffee shop down the street, where you can feel that Jake is pulling you.  Of course he’s at the coffee shop.  Of course he’s working.  What else would he be doing?

Almost recklessly, you park in front of the store and throw your hood over your head, dashing inside.  Even though you’re shaded completely from the sunlight, some of the indirect rays still get to you.  Still burn you.

But you barely feel it, because it pales in comparison to what you’re feeling inside.  When you throw open the door of the coffee shop, you see the look in Jake’s eyes too.  You can tell he’s in pain.  He NEEDS you.

You’re leaping over the counter and catching him in your arms before you’re even aware you’re moving.

Like a calming afternoon rain, the burning instantly begins to fade away.  Jake pulls you close and sniffles into your cloak, holding onto you as tightly as you’re holding him. “Dirk,” he murmurs weakly. “You came!”

“Course I came,” you respond softly, keeping him in your embrace, breathing him in and letting the bond between you calm down.  It’s like a spring gently uncoiling, relaxing back into a comfortable neutrality.

“But it’s daytime,” he protests quietly.

“Doesn’t matter,” you murmur back.  “Needed you.”

Jake whines softly, pulling you closer and sneaking inside your hood to kiss you softly.  You’re quick to run your gloved hand through the back of his hair, pulling him closer to you for a deeper kiss.  He’s so far inside your hood that people won’t see your tongues meeting.  They won’t see the look of pure need on Jake’s face, or feel in their soul that he wants you.

But all too soon, Jake is pulling away, looking apologetically at the line of people waiting for their coffee.  “I’ll be with you in a moment!” he yelps to them quickly.  

Then he turns back to you, reaching inside your hood so that he can splay his fingers through your hair and twirl them in a way that makes you melt inside for him.  He looks at you with furrowed brows and says softly, “Dirk, you should probably go, yes?  It’s daytime and--and I know you don’t fancy that much.”

Your voice is a low rumble of returned want as you murmur, “can’t leave you.  It’ll happen again.  Don’t wanna leave you anyway.”

“Thank you.  I--I don’t want to leave you either.  But you can’t stay behind the counter with me. It’s too bright!” Jake says quietly.  His expression grows even more tense, and he chews his lower lip in thought as his eyes dart to a corner of the room.  “Maybe you could stay over there?  It’s designed to be ‘cool’ for the teenagers, but I think it will work.”  

Gently, he pushes you towards the corner of the store, and while you really don’t want to be away from him, you can feel yourself being pulled toward the corner.  When you get there, you realize what Jake meant.  There’s a dark curtain that shields this corner from the bright light of the open windows.  In  place of chairs, there are large beanbag-chairs on the floor and a pho-Japanese style table that sits close to the ground, presumably for the coffee.  It’s not your usual choice of decor, but you have to admit it’s much more comfortable.  Most of the sunlight is safely kept away from you, absorbed by the dark curtain shielding you from the world.

Now that you’re closer to Jake, and the burning need to be close to him is gone, you start to feel the toll of being awake in the morning.  You sit on one of the beanbags, leaning against the wall and watching your lover rush around to make coffee for people.

You could watch Jake work all day.  You’ve watched him all night.  

You love him so much.

You love him....

You…

* * *

 

“--short nap, hmm?”

Your eyes open to find the most beautiful thing in front of you.  Jake’s crouched in front of you, smiling as he eyes you merrily, offering you a cup of coffee.

“There you are!” he laughs cheerily when he sees you shift and slowly take the cup. “I made this specially for you, Dirk. There’s no line so I have a bit of a break.  I thought, perhaps, I should say thank you for braving the morning sunlight.  You know.  For me.”

You smile softly, setting the coffee on the little table beside the beanbags, and you pull Jake into your lap.  “Had to be close to you, baby.  You felt it too, didn’t you?”

“Yes,” he says quietly, shuddering softly as your bodies come close together.  You can’t help but wish that there weren’t any clothes separating you from him.  He sighs, leaning his head against your shoulder. “It was so horrible.  I felt like it was tearing me apart.”

“I know. I felt it too,” you murmur, holding him loosely in your arms and running your hand soothingly up and down his back.  You take a few moments to think in silence before you finally admit,  “Looks like we have to be physically close to each other right now.   It’s probably because our bond is so new.”

Jake hums lightly in agreement, shifting in your lap in a way that makes you want to be physically close to him in another way.  Maybe it’s because of your new bond, or maybe it’s because of your hand on his ass, but Jake seems to completely understand what you want.  He gasps softly and looks around quickly.  “There’s still customers, but nobody’s in line.  Maybe we could go to the bathroom and--?” he trails off suggestively.

You aren’t about to stare a gifthorse in the mouth. You’re standing up, scooping Jake up with you and walking quickly to the one-person bathroom in the back of the store.  You set him down inside and close the door, locking it behind you.  It’s only then that you curse yourself for not thinking to bring any lube with you. You left in such a hurry that you didn’t even think to bring any.  Not that you carry it with you at all times or anything.  No, you definitely don’t do that.

You know Jake probably doesn’t need the lube, not if you’re slow and careful enough, but you can’t possibly risk hurting your poor human lover.  So instead, you push him against the wall, devouring his mouth in hot sloppy kisses as you press yourselves together, feeling his arousal through your clothes.

“Mmm… Dirk…” he moans softly as you both start grinding against each other.  He throws an arm around your neck, holding onto you for leverage as he pulls himself close to you, pressing you together in a smoldering slow rhythm.

Fuck do you love him.  You want him, but  you can’t have him right now.  You’ll have him later tonight, but for now, you can at least show him how much you love him.  You undo his pants, pulling him out and running your palm along his length a few times, taking pleasure in listening to his sharp gasps and soft moans.  Then, you drop to your knees, licking around his tip a few times before taking him all inside your mouth at once.

“H--hhhh--!  Dirk!!” he cries, his hands fisting into his shirt, and into your hair, and then back into his shirt.  He doesn’t seem to know what to do with them as you take him in, sucking on him and showing him your devotion.

He’s so beautiful. So perfect.  You love the way his body tenses as he leans against the wall.  You love those tiny sounds of pleasure he’s making.  You love that they’re growing louder as he grows closer.  You love everything about him.

Jake doesn’t seem to see things the same way, though, and he finally moves a hand to his mouth, shoving his knuckle inside his mouth to try and quiet himself down.  At first you don’t do anything as he muffles his sounds, noticing that he’s getting harder and harder, closer to his release.

But then you smell it.

Blood.

Not just any blood.

Jake’s blood.

A growl builds in your throat as you suck on him harder, yearning to taste him inside your mouth.  You want his love.  You want him.

He comes for you a few seconds later, and you quickly swallow him down your throat, loving his taste.  You easily milk the extra from him as you fondle his balls and swallow all of that too.

But it’s not enough.  

You need more of Jake.

You need…

In a flash, you’re standing up, pulling his hand from his mouth and licking the knuckle he bit into.  You shudder as the taste of his blood hits your tongue.  But you hold yourself back, watching as his bite wound heals, leaving his skin intact.

You meant to leave it at that.  You meant to stop there.  But when you kiss him, tasting his blood in his mouth again, it incenses you again.  You kiss him harder, deeper, wanting more of that perfect delicious taste.

Jake moans softly, not knowing exactly what you want from him.  But you know exactly what you want, and you’re powerless to stop yourself from having it.

After you’ve licked the last few precious remnants from his mouth, you lean down a little, licking his neck lovingly.  You’re biting into him before you even realize it, drinking his perfect blood because it’s exactly what you want.  

It’s what you need.

It’s what Jake needs.

Jake cries out in pleasure at first, hugging you to him.  You can tell he wants to please you, to give you what you need.  You came to him in the morning after all.

True, you’re thirsty because you haven’t fed today.  It’s a little worse since you’ve been up in the sun and burned just a little bit.  

But this goes far deeper than that.  Something primal, almost animalistic is driving you.  The demon inside you is craving Jake’s blood, and you can’t stop it.  You can’t stop taking it.

Annoying lights accost your vision, but you ignore them, drinking deeply from your lover.

You’re not sure if Jake ever tries to push you away, but you think he might.  But eventually, he stops moving, which is perfect.  It’s even easier when he’s so willing to give everything to you.

Again the lights are in your vision.  Relentless flashes of red, white, and every color you can think of.  Trying to get your attention.

It’s annoying.  So annoying.

Finally, you open your eyes a crack.

YOU’RE GOING TO KILL HIM!!!! FUCKING HELL, DIRK, STOP!!!!

Kill him?  Kill who?  You wonder as you lick the perfect blood on your lips.

JAKE. THE GUY YOU JUST BONDED WITH YOU DUMBASS. STOP DRINKING NOW OR HE’S GOING TO DIE!!!

And finally the literal words and the truth reach you.

You gasp and pull away from Jake’s neck, a cold wave of dread descending on you as you hold his limp motionless body in your arms. “Fuck!! JAKE!!!”  You shout, jostling him a little.

But he doesn’t wake up.

Fuck fuck fuck!!!

Your eyes dart to his neck, which is still pouring blood.  The draw of his blood is too strong, and you can’t stop yourself from licking up the blood, running your tongue across the holes your teeth made in his skin, healing them.

The temptation to bite right into him again is overwhelmingly strong, but you growl lowly, forcing yourself not to do it.

Fucking hell, Dirk. That took way too long. You better make sure he’s not dead.Hal’s text runs across your shades, and you nod along wordlessly.

You pull Jake into your arms, cradling him and carrying him bridal style out of the bathroom.  You recognize one of the other employees, Nepeta, where she’s sitting before her shift, enjoying reading what appears to be a romance novel.  You dash to her quickly and explain, “Nepeta, Jake’s sick. I’ve gotta take him home now. Think you can cover for the rest of his shift?”

“Sure,” she says, standing up with concern.  “Is he ok?”

“I hope so,” you murmur, not staying to hear any more.  You throw your hood back on, since the sun is still out, and take him quickly to your car.

When you set him in the passenger seat, he finally stirs a little, and your heart almost flutters with relief.  “Nnnn…..Dirk…..?  What……” he murmurs almost inaudibly.

“Baby, I’m so fuckin’ sorry,” you explain, leaning over the middle armrest and cuddling him closely to you. “Don’t know what came over me. I--I bit you again.  I took so much of your blood….fuck Jake, are you ok?  Should I take you to a hospital?”

Immediately, Jake moans and shakes his head.  “No….. no hospitals….. just…… home….”  After he struggles to say the last word, his head rolls to the side and he loses consciousness again.

You’re really not comfortable taking care of a human, but you will respect Jake’s wishes.  He must have his reasons for not wanting to go to the hospital.  You drive back to your place and get him back in your bed, where you tear off your cloak and climb in beside him.

But now you don’t know what to do.  You don’t know how to take care of a hurt human.  Whenever Dave got hurt, you always just fed him your blood and he got better.  Taking care of a vampire was easy.  

But a human?  What the fuck do you do with a human?  Could you do the same thing you did for Dave?  Would that even work?

You wonder.  Maybe.  Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to try?

Gingerly, you bite into your wrist and press it to your lover’s lips.  “Hey, try drinkin’ a little, baby.”

You were worried that Jake might not want your blood, but you’re surprised when he actually responds, his pink tongue darting out to lick the blood from your wrist.  Encouraged, you press it firmly to his lips, watching as he starts drinking.

You smile a little with relief when you feel it.  Jake’s getting a little stronger.  A little better. Your blood must have healing properties for humans too.

Eventually, Jake stops drinking and falls asleep again, but you can tell he’s a little better now. He won’t die tonight.

Relieved, you curl up beside him, holding him close as you both sleep through the rest of the day.

* * *

 

You are suddenly JOHN EGBERT, and this is the most boring shift you’ve ever worked.  

You groan and flop over the edge of the counter of the empty coffee shop, wondering how Jake does this literally every second of his life.

You are so.  SO.  BORED!

Sure, this is technically your summer job, but here you are working in the winter!  Just a few days away from Christmas!   Because even though it’s not summer, your dad still wants you to work on your winter break for some stupid reason like growing up to be a big strong responsible adult that can lift up the refrigerator.

Whatever.  Like you’re not already.  

Ok, you can’t lift up the refrigerator, but you ARE an adult!

You’re 20!  

You’ve already been through a whole year and a half of college, and your professors have really opened your eyes to the problems in the world around you.

Like war.  Man, war sucks.  Why do people even bother?

And the government of literally every country. They suck too. They all just need to get their acts together and stop sucking each others dicks all the time for political favors.

You giggle to yourself for a second.  Gay jokes are hilarious!  Because you know you’re not a homosexual, so you’re safe. You can joke all you want!

But then the funny moment passes.  And you realize you still have exactly an hour and thirty seven minutes left in your shift.  You think if you had a job where you literally stared at the clock and watched the seconds tick by, like you are now, it might be pretty boring.

Almost as boring as working in this coffee shop on a tuesday night.

ALMOST.

You check your phone for the millionth time, but you don’t have any new emails or texts.  For a second you check your text message thread with Jake, but he still hasn’t responded to you.  You worry your lip a little, because this isn’t like him.  He doesn’t usually pass out at work, and he’s usually very good at texting back!

But there’s nothing you can do about it, aside from take some of his work shifts this week.  You’ve already talked about it with Nepeta, who is suspicious of Jake’s new boyfriend.  You don’t know why, because you imagine anyone related to Dave must be pretty awesome!

Dave is pretty awesome.  You just met him yesterday, but you’re already kind of hoping he’ll come back.

If Dave was here, things would be less boring.

But Dave’s not here.  And why the fuck are you thinking about Dave anyway? It shouldn’t be the responsibility of one random dude you met last night to entertain you.

You’re a perfectly capable adult! You can entertain yourself!

You wiggle your arms and legs around like a jellyfish, dying of boredom.  It wastes a good fifteen seconds.

You take a giant breath and groan quietly to yourself, extending it out for a good minute before you have to take another breath to keep it going.

Somewhere mid-groan, you hear the distinct sound of the door opening, and you quickly pick yourself up off the counter. Your hands are on your apron, straightening it out and hastily glancing at the counter to make sure you didn’t leave any drool from your boredom coma.

You relax a little bit when you see that it’s Dave, and then you perk up, throwing him a lopsided smile.  “Back again?  I think you’ve started a habit.”

Dave walks up to the counter and leans against it easily.  “What?  Psssh.  Naw man.  A habit’s like the urge to pick your nose out in public.  That compelling freudian-like desire to do something you know is wrong. Something socially unacceptable but gratifying in every way.  Like masturbating on the bus. It’s a trainwreck, but once you start you know there’s no going back.”

“Wouldn’t that be a bus-wreck?” you pipe in, getting Dave started again.  

You listen to Dave ramble on and find yourself laughing softly under your breath.  Dave always says the funniest things!  He kept you company the rest of your shift last night, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t happy about it. Working in this coffee shop is one of the most boring things in the world.  At least you think so.  But Dave’s visit brought you laughter and fun.  

He made the night go by so quickly.  

Suddenly, you realize you were wrong! You might be a responsible adult that can’t quite lift the refrigerator yet, but you can’t be responsible for entertaining yourself the rest of the night!  Suddenly, you can’t imagine what it would be like to not have Dave around. You can’t possibly fathom the boredom of another hour and thirty two minutes by your lonesome.

Before Dave even asks for coffee, you’re already spinning around, making him something that you think he might like.  You use your darkest roast for a bitter flavor and add some mocha and peppermint to smooth out the blend into a wintery flavor.  You smile as you hand it to him.  “On the house.”

He raises an eyebrow to you. “Dude, aren’t you gonna get in trouble?  Some manager might ninja his way out of the backroom with a broom and demand his $4.75 for this overpriced shit.”

You frown at him. “Don’t call it shit! You haven’t even tried it!  And there’s no manager that would want to waste his time working this late anyway. It’s just you, me, and the coffee machines tonight.”

He actually seems a little thrown by your sort-of-real and sort-of-fake fury.  “Fine I’ll try it,” he says. He takes a small sip at first, and then he chugs down half of it.  “This is the shit. And by the shit, I mean THE shit.”

“Good shit?” You ask.

“Woah, hey, I don’t ask what you do on lonely nights by yourself.  Let me have my shits in peace,” he says, drinking the rest of it.  “Speaking of, wanna make me more of this shit?”

You do.  And when he drinks that, you make him another.  And another.  And another.  You don’t think you’ve ever seen someone drink quite so much coffee so quickly.  

It’s like he’s the thirstiest guy you’ve ever met.  You wonder what could possibly be making him so thirsty? Did he just run a marathon or something? From the looks of him, you don’t think so.

He finishes them as fast as you make them, and after a point, you finally point to the trash can.  “You can throw that cup out, because I’m done making you more right now.”

Dave actually does it, and as he turns around to throw away the cup across the room, you watch his hips sway ever so subtly back and forth as he walks. Hiis butt moves in a way that makes you want to just reach out and touch it.

You gasp and instantly push that thought away.  You do NOT want to touch another guy’s butt!  You’re not a butt toucher!  (Unless it involves poking someone with a stick for a prank, and then you’re all for that.)

But you are NOT a homosexual!

Dave turns back around, and you must be making a kind of weird face, because he looks at you and asks, “dude, you ok?”

“Yep, peachy!” you chirp in response.  You can’t let him know you were thinking about touching his butt.  Gah! There’s that thought again!

“Cool, I’d hate to think you tired yourself out making all that coffee, cause then we couldn’t go to the arcade together after you finish your shift,” he rambles but stops suddenly, looking up at you from behind those giant sunglasses.  

“Yeah I know! … wait,” you murmur, processing what Dave said. “Are you asking me ou--”

“Yeah, I wanna know if you wanna go to the arcade later,” Dave quickly blurts out over your question. “You know, just two bros hanging out and playing some games. Winning cheap ticket prizes and all that.  Doesn’t that sound like something you’d wanna do?”

Slowly, a smile spreads across your face.  Dave is such a dork, but you aren’t about to turn him down.  “Hell yeah! Let’s do it!  I haven’t been to the arcades with a friend in forever!”

When you say the word “friend,” you think you see Dave twitch just a little bit.  It’s tough to tell from behind those damned glasses.  But before you can think too much about it, he’s back to nodding and prattling on.  “Yeah. Yeah cool, two friends just hanging out and chillin’. Sounds like it’ll be a blast. Wouldn’t want to get in the way of that, nope. Sounds like something that’s definitely happening tonight.”

And then it happens.  The awkwardness.

You stare at Dave.

Dave stares back at you.

You swallow and just start instinctively making him coffee again, because at least that gives you something to do.  Why the fuck are you feeling so… so nervous around him?!  This isn’t how friends feel around each other!

Or is it?  It’s been so long since you hung out with a friend that you’re not really sure. You get together with Rose on occasion, but lately she’s busy with school and her girlfriend. You used to hang out with Jake a lot, but he’s so busy working now that you rarely see him.   And Jake…you think about what you heard happened to Jake today, and you chew the inside of your lip a little bit with concern.

Somehow Dave catches that immediately, and he asks again, “are you sure everything’s ok?  If you don’t wanna go to the arcade we don’t have to.”

“No!” you respond quickly. “I do want to go!  I’m just worried about my cousin.”

“Jake the tool?” Dave asks.

“He’s not a tool!” You defend quickly.  “But yeah.  Jake passed out today during work.  I don’t know what happened exactly, because I wasn’t here.  But I guess your brother took him back home.  I’ve tried texting him, but he hasn’t responded to me. This isn’t like him. I wonder if he’s working himself too hard?”

Dave is silent for a moment, and you think that maybe his brow is furrowing just a bit.  Eventually, he responds and says, “yeah, maybe that’s it.  Sounds like he’s working every night. Probably not good for the guy.”

Somehow you get the feeling Dave’s not telling you something.  But before you can question him about it, he starts talking about the arcade.  “This arcade is cool as shit.  You’re gonna love it.  And I know a guy who can get us free tokens. He owes me big time,” he almost doesn’t even breathe between his sentences as he continues. “Bet I can bet you at all the games, Eggbuns.”

“No way!” you defend quickly, the tension suddenly fading away as you talk to him. “I’d like to see you try!”

Dave entertains you with idle chatter for the last hour of your shift, and he even stays around the extra half hour while you clean and close up the shop for the night.  You’re kind of glad he stayed, and not just because you were so bored earlier.  Talking to Dave is nice.  It’s been a while since you hung out with a friend and felt this comfortable with them.  

By the end of the shift, you’re REALLY looking forward to going to the arcade with Dave.  He holds the door for you, and you roll your eyes at him a little as you turn right back around to lock the door.

“Hey, I saw that eyeroll, Egbert.  I’ve gotta be a gentleman.  Gotta treat the ladies right,” he says, the phrase rolling easily off his tongue.

“Or treat the gentlemen right,” you snark back as you both start walking down the street.

“Who says you’re a gentleman?” he argues, chuckling as you shove him a little. “You don’t get that fab status until you prove your worth at the arcade.”

“Oh you are so on!” you exclaim, more than ready to show Dave you can beat him!

He leads you to the biggest arcade in town, filled with flashy glitzy lights and ticket games galore. Dave does indeed know a toked out looking guy that’s covered in clown make-up.  When you approach, he gives you both a big dopey smile and says, “Strider my man, all up and getting your chill on out in the twilight with this human. Motherfuckin miracle.”

Did the guy just call you a human?  Weird.  

Clowns are weird.

People who dress up like clowns are REALLY weird.  And scary.

You shy away from the clown guy a little and let Dave do the rest of the talking to him, getting a few handfuls of tokens from him.  The guy starts up a game of basketball, and you and Dave both do miserably poorly.  You squeak as the clown guy lays a sympathetic hand on your shoulder. “Don’t be getting all up and sad, they’re rigged to be harder. But I saw a guy hit five in a row once.  Motherfuckin miracle if I ever saw one.”

Dave shoves the clown guy’s arm off you, and slings his own arm over your shoulder, pulling you away. “Back off, dude, this is my gentleman.”

You smirk at him. “Gentleman, huh?”

“Not till you prove yourself at skeeball,” Dave says, leading you over to the skeeball machines.

As you put your token into the slot, you grin at him.  “I’ve already won.”

“No you haven’t,” Dave says.  “The game literally hasn’t started yet.”

“Yeah, I know, but it’s already over,” you smile, reaching for the first wooden ball.  

“No it isn’t!” Dave insists, and you snicker because you can tell that you’re getting to him a little bit. Even though he looks the same on the outside, you can hear the tone of his voice change. Dave wants to win.  

Dave tosses ball after ball directly into the center ring.  You have to admit, he’s pretty good. He looks at you smugly.  “See all those 50,000s, Egbert?  Now the game’s over.”  

“Oh, I told you, it was over before you even started,” you say confidently.  Nobody beats you at skeeball.  Nobody.  You arc your arm back and with perfect aim toss the ball into the tiny corner pocket. “100,000!  Take that Dave!”

You throw ball after ball into the tiny pocket worth the most points, tying up the game easily before you even come close to using up all your balls. Just as you’re about to throw the next, Dave bumps your arm.  “Oops.”

“Dave!” You exclaim as the ball flies off the back and rolls into the zero pocket. “That’s cheating!”

“In the wise words of Seto Kaiba: screw the rules, I have money,” Dave says sagely.

And when you look back, somehow all of the remaining balls have vanished.  You would complain, but damn, that was stealthy.  You think Dave could be an awesome prankster, and that has you too impressed to complain.

“What do you know, looks like we tied,” Dave says, swiping your tickets and moving along to the next game.

The rest of the night is nothing short of amazing.  Dave does somehow manage to win at a lot of those cheap ticket games. Though you win your fair share, Dave beats you easily in many of those, earning tons of tickets.  But when you eventually drag him back to skeeball, and force him to show you his hands the whole time, you easily wipe the floor with him.  The sirens go off as your score beats the high score, giving you the jackpot of tickets.

And that’s not to mention all of the non-ticket games you play.  Usually you can wipe the floor with anyone at all the driving games. And though Jake holds the record in every single arcade for his shooting skills, you’re not too far behind him.  But Dave is easily your match in everything. He even dances a mean Dance Dance Revolution.

At the end of the night, you both take your tickets to the ticket counter for your cheesy prizes.  Dave chooses a stuffed yellow salamander doll and jams it in your hood.  You choose a red crocodile and put it on Dave’s head.  Dave takes a selfie of the two of you using the reflection from the bathroom mirror.

He insisted on coming with you to the bathroom even though he didn’t have to go?  You thought only girls did that?  But whatever.  Two bros hanging out. It’s totally cool.

And before long, you’re both walking down the street to your house, talking smack about how you’re going to beat each other next time.

It isn’t long before you reach your home.  You can tell it’s late. The light in window to your father’s room is already off.  Nobody else is out tonight. It’s just you and Dave, alone in the crisp evening air.

He turns to you, and you smile, feeling a flurry of giddy happiness building inside you. “Tonight was fun,” you tell him, still smiling at him as you lean back against the frame of your door.  You laugh a little as you feel the yellow salamander squish against the doorframe and your back, reminding you that it’s still in your hood.

“Yeah, it was,” Dave agrees. He steps a little closer, taking off the crocodile he’d had balanced on his head all night and stuffing it under his arm.  

“It’s been so long since I’ve gone out with anyone before,” you catch yourself and quickly stammer. “You know.  As friends.”

“Totally as friends,” Dave agrees.  You wish you could see behind his dark glasses, but you have no hope of looking past them at this time of night, even as he leans in a little closer.

“You’re… pretty good at games,” you murmur, not sure why you hesitated there. As if you were struggling to think of something to say to keep Dave here.  You don’t want him to leave.

“So are you,” he agrees again. He’s so close that you can feel the warmth from his body.  His leg is brushing against your leg, and he’s SO CLOSE to you.

You don’t want him to leave.  You don’t ever want him to leave.

You want him forever.

And suddenly, you’re leaning in the rest of the way.  You’re meeting his lips as they brush lightly against yours, making that perfect little sound lips make when they just barely meet.  

You’re kissing him.

You’re kissing Dave Strider.

You gasp, pulling back away quickly.  “I-I’m sorry, Dave!” you stammer, turning around and retreating into your house, slamming the door behind you.

Your breathing is rapid and ragged as you stand with your back to the door, in complete shock over what just happened.

You kissed Dave. You KISSED him!  What the fuck was possessing you?  Where did all those thoughts come from, about wanting him forever?!

But Dave Strider is a GUY.  Which means you CAN’T want him forever!  You’re NOT a homosexual!

And yet… you had that thought.  That stray thought.  That you didn’t want him to leave.  That you still don’t really want him to leave.  Maybe you don’t love him, but you want him to stick around.

Oh fuck. You just totally slammed the door on his face!  Even if you aren’t madly in love with him, he’s still your friend and that was really fucking rude! Quickly, you open the door, about to apologize, but he’s gone. You furrow your brows.  

It’s only been a couple seconds, but somehow Dave Strider managed to completely vanish.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LateNiteSlacker here! Sorry about the long delay! Grad school has kept me super busy, but graduation is on the horizon! Literally! So the pause should be over. Sachi and I would like to start updating fairly regularly now until the end of this fic. Hope you all enjoy!


	8. Pets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I’ve been running from it all my lifetime!  
> There’s nothing wrong with you, I’m searching for my right mind!  
> Oh, you should’ve seen it they were resting on the restless.  
> This happened, literally - woke up I was headless!  
> I woke up I was headless!" -["Hollow Moon (Bad Wolf)"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2PsXT88UeU) by AWOLNATION

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have you ever immediately thought of a song while writing a chapter? As soon as I heard "Imma make a deal with the bad wolf so the bad wolf don't bite no more" I was sunk. 
> 
> Update Thursday!

You wake up feeling drained of energy and  _starving_. Groaning a bit, you roll over, not surprised when Dirk makes a tiny noise and moves with you, refusing to let go even when he's asleep. He's amazingly cuddly—you never would have guessed that about him. And you suppose after yesterday, he has the right to be more clingy than usual.

You're Jake English, and you feel like death.

You check your phone which lights up in the dark room, making you squint to see the time. It's after  _sunset!_  You haven't slept this late since high school! It's a good thing you were off today, because you aren't sure anything would have woken you up! You send your grandmother a quick text since she sent a very concerned message, and then you turn back over to nuzzle into Dirk, thinking to yourself that you need to remember to get a nightlight for this completely dark basement bedroom so you can  _see_  when you wake up. You don't want to fall over on your way to the bathroom!

"Feelin' better, baby?" Dirk's voice asks suddenly. You can barely make out his face in the dark, but you can feel his concern flooding through your bond. You nod and kiss him reassuringly.

"I slept till nighttime! I can hardly believe it!" you say and he laughs softly.

"I can. You've worked every day the past two weeks and I—I did that to you yesterday."

You groan and pull him into another kiss, petting his face in what you hope is a calming gesture.

"Dirk, I know you didn't mean to. It was my own fault for biting myself and I made you go out during the daytime so it's no wonder you were starving!" Almost on cue, your stomach growls loudly, and Dirk sits up to turn on the lamp, looking at you with wide eyes.

"You didn't even eat anything yesterday. I let you sleep through your usual human dinner time and breakfast and-" He runs a hand through his hair and looks so distraught over your behalf you can't help but pull him into a hug.

"I wouldn't have woken up if you'd tried! Now stop being so hard on yourself, would you? I think I'll go out to get something-"

"I'll get it!" Dirk says, jumping to his feet so fast that it makes your head spin. He pulls on his jeans and gives you an imploring look. "What do you want? I can grab it and come right back."

"Don't I have to be with you? Our bond-"

"I'll make it fast. I want you to rest here, baby," he says, coming back to you to kiss your forehead. He looks so hopeful, and his willingness to take care of you fills your chest with warmness. "What do you wanna eat?"

You hum thoughtfully. "Steak. Really, really  _rare_  steak. With a baked potato and maybe some broccoli on the side—wait no, no broccoli." You look up at him, your mouth watering already, and he grins at you, kissing you again before he pulls on a shirt and steps into his shoes.

"Just so happens I live close to a steakhouse," he says, pulling out his phone and looking up the number before he calls. You listen to him place the order and then watch as he moves to the bathroom where you know he's working on his hair—he refuses to leave the house without working on his hair. He comes back out after a few minutes, moving to kiss you again. "I'll be back in a few minutes, okay? Just take it easy till I get back."

"Okay," you say uneasily, not looking forward to the pulling being apart from him will cause, but willing to go through it if it means you get steak afterward. He leaves the room and you hear his steps on the stairs, then the front door opens and closes. Looking around, you decide to keep yourself busy until he returns. Dirk is  _fast_  after all. It won't be like yesterday at the coffee shop, where you needed him so bad you were considering leaving work. You look around the empty bedroom and move to Dirk's dresser where an odd red big nosed plush toy is staring at you with huge eyes. Curious, you pick it up and feel the soft felt covering it until your fingers find a switch. You turn it on and jump when it starts  _vibrating_.

"What in  _blazes_!" You drop it and watch as it shakes and rattles on the floor. It's only after you pay attention to the bulbous nose and its peculiar shape that you hide your face in your hands and just  _laugh_  uncontrollably, falling back to the bed and rolling around in it. Your boyfriend is an enigma, and you don't think you'll ever be  _used_ to the ludicrous wonders all over his house.

You stand up again and move to the cabinet in the far corner, sitting in front of it when you realize it's full of movies. Most of them look pretty old—he has a  _ton_  of VHS tapes—and a few of them look like horror movies. Dirk doesn't seem to like adventure movies very much, nor does he deem romance very worthy to put in his collection. You frown as you open the other door and then you light up when you discover the other half of the cabinet is full to the brim with video games. Super Nintendo, Nintendo 64, Gamecube, Wii, Xbox, Xbox 360, Playstation original through 4—even a  _Dreamcast!_  You've never even seen a Dreamcast! Eagerly, you scour the room until you find the consoles, and you drool a bit as you admire the mint condition they're in, not a speck of dust on them.

You wince as the pulling feeling intensifies, your chest feeling hollow as your body begs you to go after Dirk. You wonder if this will ever wear off, this emptiness that hurts bad enough to reduce you to tears. Whining softly, you move back to the bed and curl under the covers, briefly distracted from your pain by your phone chiming, signaling a new pester.

EB: jake!

GT: Oh hello john!

EB: "hello", he says.

EB: do you even know how worried i have been about you? is that even a thing you care about?

GT: Ive been asleep! I didnt think to tell you until now but i am fine and will be at work first thing tomorrow!

EB: you JUST woke up? okay now i'm concerned for real. you're always awake at the crack of dawn! you must really not feel well. :(

GT: I was a little worse for wear a while but i am feeling much better now. Dirk has taken great care of me! So there is no need for you to worry any longer!

EB: yeah, okay…

GT: Is something else troubling you chum? Forgive me if i am not a *MASTER* at deciphering your mood through our chat client but you seem a little...morose. Are you alright?

EB: yeah. just you know.

EB: we never really talk anymore. i miss you.

You feel something akin to a lump in your throat and you hurriedly type back.

GT: I miss you as well. We will go see a movie soon! And catch up. I know i have been busy and i am awfully sorry john. You know youre still my best bro.

EB: we're cousins. can cousins even be best bros?

GT: Yes they most assuredly can! Do you have anyone in your life who fits the bro bill better than i?

EB: oh my god.

GT: See i did not think so!

EB: also there was another thing i wanted to talk to you about. but...it's kind of weird. kind of REALLY weird. but i know you would understand better than anyone.

GT: Oh? What is it?

EB: okay so…

EB: what if i SORT OF…after work last night...

EB: bluh.

GT: *Waits with baited breath!*

EB: never mind i decided we can talk about it later. it might be easier to talk about in person.

GT: Then we can discuss it tomorrow at work! I am very curious now! Its nothing foul to do with gramma right? No bad news?

EB: nothing like that. it's to do with something different. yeah we can talk about it tomorrow.

GT: Aces then! And we can discuss what movie we shall see in the near future!

EB: yeah i'm excited about that! it's been so long!

GT: TOO long. See you tomorrow.

EB: okay. goodnight!

GT: Goodnight!

You put your phone back on the table and whine again as you're reminded of the pain being apart from Dirk causes you, and you curl into a ball, hoping he gets back soon.

And then, suddenly, you're being lifted and cradled into Dirk's chest. You cling greedily to him, inhaling his scent as he does the same to you.

"That was torture," you murmur, wrapping your arms around his neck. He sets you back down in the bed and sits as close to you as he can while he digs in the huge carryout bag. Immediately you snatch it from him, tearing out the Styrofoam container and opening it. You almost  _cry_  from how good it smells. Bypassing silverware, you use your hands and bite into the steak. It's so raw that the blood dribbles down your chin but you don't care. You finish it in record time and then lick your fingers happily, some of your hunger sated but— _oh!_  He bought you another steak?! You love him so much! Still ravenous, you pull the other container out and tear into the steak just as barbarically as the first. Dirk is watching you with wide eyes.

"Goddamn, Jake, you  _were_  starving," he says. You hear him shuffling with the bag, and you look over as he pulls the baked potato out but you can't be bothered with that right now because  _steak_. Dirk grins at you and reaches over to wipe your chin with a napkin lovingly.

After the second steak is gone, you reach lazily for the potato and take a few bites, using a fork this time, and then you flop against your mate, full to busting.

"Why in the world did you let me  _eat_  all of that?" you whine, rubbing your stomach.

"'Cause it was rad as hell watchin' you unhinge your jaw just to eat it," he says, kissing your chin. He licks his lips thoughtfully. "The steak doesn't taste so bad for human food. Probably 'cause you got it so raw."

"I just had the most wicked hankering for it. And now my stomach hates me." You groan and crawl in his lap, making a pleased noise when he wraps around you. "I feel as though I could sleep for a thousand more years..."

"You could always call in tomorrow," Dirk suggests.

"No, I can't! I already missed half a day yesterday and that was more than enough! I should have just toughed it out and endured the measly shift!"

Dirk stares at you. "Jake, I almost  _killed_  you yesterday. You—you could have—" He stops speaking abruptly and squeezes you tightly, petting through your hair. "Shouldn't have bonded with you... It's my job to keep you  _safe_  and now I'm your biggest threat..."

"Now, see here!" You huff, pulling away from him. "It was  _both_  our decisions! And I don't regret it in the least! You would  _never_  hurt me, Dirk. I know that more than I know anything else! You just...you have to be more careful to take care of yourself, is all! You didn't feed properly and it made you unable to fight the need for blood!"

Dirk shakes his head, looking at you with such sadness in his eyes that it hurts you. "That's not a fuckin' excuse, Jake. I'd say I shouldn't feed from you anymore, but it isn't that simple now. You're my mate and...I bonded with you, so now I have to have your blood more than anyone's. Even now I can't stop myself from wantin' it and you're already so weak..."

You sigh and let him squeeze you to death again. You don't see what the big deal is, really. He can feed from other people and then feed from you last. If he isn't as thirsty, it won't matter. And really, he probably was suffering so much from the sunlight that he  _had_  to have your blood! But he's still acting like this is the end of the world and you're on your deathbed.

Wiggling out of his grasp, you move to the bathroom and immediately he's on his feet, following you.

"What's wrong? Are you sick?"

"I need to  _shower_ , Dirk. I have to work tomorrow and something tells me I'm not going to want to do it in the morning." He still follows you, and you're a little glad for it because you know the pulling will return if you separate from him, though not as badly since he'll be in the house with you.. When he stands there awkwardly as you pull off your shirt, you snort and shake your head. "Would you care to join me?"

"Yes," he says quickly, like he was hoping you'd ask. He yanks his clothes off with impressive speed and moves to adjust the taps. You marvel at Dirk's bathroom while he fiddles with the water temperature, since last time you saw it you were exhausted and weak. He has a separate tub, and his shower stands alone. The shower is big enough for at least six people to stand comfortably inside with plenty of room left over, and he has fancy bottles littering the sides, each of them probably costing more than you make in a week. Dirk is  _loaded_ , and it kind of tickles you to know one thing he spends endless amounts of money on is cleanliness. As soon as you kick your pajama pants off, he pulls you inside and closes the glass door, wrapping around you once again like a cuddly boa constrictor.

"Dirk," you huff. "How am I supposed to get clean with you like this? The hot water will run out!"

"The hot water doesn't run out here. I rigged it so it wouldn't," he says, his voice muffled because his face is buried in your hair.

"Oh, of  _course_  you did," you grumble, finding you can't even move with him draped across you. After a few minutes you sigh loudly, wiggling again. "Let me go so I can shower, Dirk!"

He does so, surprisingly fast, almost like he had no choice because you commanded him. But then he gives you such a pitiful look that you groan and reach for one of his fancy bottles, having to read the label to make sure it's shampoo before you pull his head down to your level and start massaging it into his scalp.

"Would you  _relax_?" you ask him softly. "I am  _fine_. I have been through worse, believe me! You don't have to keep punishing yourself!"

"I never wanna hurt you..." he says so quietly you barely hear him. He sighs as you rinse the shampoo from his hair. You move for the conditioner and he hands you a bottle, so you use it next.

"It's  _fine_ , Dirk. I swear to you that I am fine!" You marvel at the way your massaging fingers are reducing him to a helpless heap, his tall frame curling down to wrap around you as you spoil him. A small noise emits from his throat that sounds like...purring? You giggle, supposing that since he acts like a giant house cat already you shouldn't be surprised.

"Mmmm... _fuck_ , baby..." he moans quietly, lifting his head to nip and lick at your neck. You smile, thinking to yourself that Dirk calls you 'baby' more than he calls you by your actual name, and you're far too used to that already. "You're spoilin' me..."

"Well, since you were nice and bought me steak, I suppose it's the least I can do," you hum thoughtfully, rinsing his hair again. He hands you  _another_ bottle, and you quirk an eyebrow. "What is  _this_  one for?"

"Stops flyaways," he says simply, returning to ravish your neck. You snort at him.

"With all the hairspray you put in your hair, I'm sure they're stopped enough."

"Nah, hairspray is too harsh and makes my hair hard. Use sculpting cream and only a  _little_  hairspray on windy nights."

"Dirk, be glad that I love you, because you are ridiculous. I found your silly sex toys, too. Might I ask why they have to  _stare_  at you?"

He snickers against your neck like a child with a hilarious secret and you can't help but smile. You know no one else in the world has seen this side of him before, not like this. He couldn't hide himself from you if he  _wanted_  to, because you can feel everything he's feeling, and he must know that. He's being so  _open_  with you, and you're so in love with him it's a marvel you aren't floating out of the shower.

"They weren't  _always_  starin'. Had the basic shape of them down and Dave happened to be terrified of them. So I adjusted them to have the wide eyes to freak him out even more. You should hear the way he screams when you manage to put enough of them in his bedroom to cover every inch of the floor. It was like a rainbow plush rump carpet made just for him, and he screeched like a little baby. I think I taped it, actually." Dirk laughs again, and you join him because the thought of Dave terrified of them is rather humorous.

"I thought it was cute!" you say. "It took me a moment to realize what it was  _for_ , but it didn't  _scare_  me."

"'Cause you got taste, baby," he says easily, pulling you into a kiss.

"I must not have very high tastes if I'm dating a man who gets his jollies from torturing his brother with rainbow plush sex toys."

He grins at you, that fond look in his eyes practically making them glow, and you shift on your feet, unable to look at him when he looks at you like you're just—his entire  _world_.

"So...should I rinse the flyaway concoction from your hair now?" You look up and he nods, allowing you to duck his head back down to your level. You take care to keep anything from dripping into his face, petting through his hair until that wonderful purring noise fills the shower. He smells so good, his own scent mixed with the zesty orange shampoo and the hot water... You don't think about it, just nuzzle into his neck and lick from his throat to his hairline, wanting... _something_. He tenses in your arms, lifting your face so you're forced to look at him and then something just  _snaps_.

You lunge for his mouth at the same time he lunges for yours, both of you desperate to claim each other. Something inside is just screaming for him. You  _need_  him, and it's so intense you can barely think about anything else. He presses you into the shower wall, devouring your mouth with a low growling noise, his hands moving to your ass where he kneads and squeezes until you melt into putty in his hands.

You want him but you're so  _tired_  and...

"Lemme take care of you, baby," he says softly in your ear. "Don't gotta move a muscle, just let me do all the work."

And how could you possibly argue with that? You yelp as he lifts you like you weigh nothing, tilting you against the shower wall as he fumbles around, turning your mind to mush as he ruts his hips against yours. You've wanted this for so  _long_ , for him to just  _take_  you without worrying you would crumble in his arms. Your jaw drops as he reduces you to a keening heap of bliss, unaware of anything he's doing as he moves around, searching for something, still holding you like it's nothing. Finally he stills, and you groan as you hear the telltale sound of a cap popping open, feel his slicked fingers pressing between your cheeks as he stretches and prepares you for him.

When he's finally pushing inside, everything shuts off except your raw  _need_  for him. You can't move much with him holding you in place, but you still try, your voice dissolving into high-pitched whimpers and pleas for  _more please Dirk, more!_  He's growling in your ear, and it takes you a moment to figure out he's actually speaking to you, his gravelly voice barely audible under the throaty growls.

" _Mine_ , Jake, you're  _mine_..."

You nod dumbly, unable to say much else as your orgasm peaks, your toes curling as your head slams back against the tiles and a desperate cry leaves your throat. Immediately he clamps to your neck, biting in, and you gasp, feebly trying to push him off and pull him closer simultaneously.

"Dirk...Dirk, no..." You  _just_  started feeling better! He can't drain you again! But you also can't say much with him still pressing in and out of your body as he seeks his own climax. Just when you start to feel like it hurts from over-stimulation, he whines and comes deep inside of you, his mouth still on your neck as he trembles with pleasure. You tug his hair and make another distressed noise, and finally, he seems to hear you.

"Nnn...baby..." He pulls back to smile dazedly at you, and then his eyes trail to your throat again, recognition settling in his features. "Jake! Fuck—baby, are you okay? I didn't take too much, did I?"

"No, it's alright..." You mumble, your voice raspy from crying so loudly for him. You wrap your arms around his neck and firmly refuse to move, happy to fall asleep like this. He sets to washing you off, setting your feet back on the shower floor, and it's only when he makes you rinse your hair that you notice the displeased frown on his face. "What's the matter?"

"I can't control myself around your blood," he mutters. "I don't even fucking remember bitin' you."

"Did you feed tonight?"

He nods, his fingers moving back to your hair as he uses some more of his fancy products. "I wasn't riskin'  _not_  feedin' tonight, knowin' you're in no shape to give me blood. And here I took it from you anyway."

You hum as he rinses you again. "Perhaps it's a mating thing?"

"Mating thing?"

"Both times it's been when we were...erm.  _Physical_. You get that look on your face like you want to consume me." Your brows furrow. "Or at least that's how it looked yesterday. I couldn't rightly see you with your face pressed to my neck, but I'd wager it was about the same."

He looks so angry with himself that you can't resist tapping his nose with your finger.

"Boop," you say, smiling stupidly, and he looks torn between a smile and a grimace. It's actually a pretty frightening expression.

"Jake, how the fuck can you not  _care_  about this? I'm supposed to protect you and I'm your greatest threat!" He growls at himself, baring his teeth, and you huff at him.

"I'd say my  _greatest_  threat is happenstance, seeing as how I'm a human. Or perhaps bunions. Gramma has quite a few of those."

" _Jake,"_  he sighs exasperatedly, turning the water off. Without the sound of the running water you feel like you can  _hear_  the gears turning in his head. One day that supercomputer brain of his is going to have a meltdown, and you won't have the slightest clue how to reboot him. You decide to help him the only way you know how.

You reach up and squish his cheeks so his lips pucker out, and then you laugh at the ridiculous expression you're forcing him to make.

"I don't think anyone who lets me do this to his face is a threat to me," you giggle. "Relax for a bit, Dirk. I will just have to start being more vigilant during sex, and you will have to do the same! It isn't the end of the world, you know."

"But—"

"Do not argue with me, Dirk Strider! I know best!"

He grumbles and swats your hands away, reaching for a fluffy white towel. You squawk as he practically attacks you with the thing, drying you forcefully.

"Since when do  _you_  know best?" he asks.

"Since always! English intuition is never wrong!" You're finally able to find your way out of the towel, and you yank it from him, drying yourself off while you grin at him. He shakes his head and  _finally_  smiles, pulling you into a hug.

"God _damn_ , Jake," he sighs into your hair. "I love you so much."

It still blows your mind a bit when he just  _says_  things like that, but it always leaves a pleasant warmness in your chest.

"I love you too, pet," you murmur, and he makes a tiny noise you barely catch. You grin wickedly. "Oho, so you like when I call you that?"

"Call me what?" he asks nonchalantly.

" _Pet."_

He leans closer to you and  _licks_  your cheek like it's nothing, and then gets his own towel, leaving the bathroom as he goes in search of clothes. You laugh and bound after him.

"You  _are_  just like an affectionate house cat!"

"I am a  _demon_ , Jake," he says, pulling on some sweatpants.

"My aunt used to have a cat that reminded me a bit of a demon," you recall. "There's quite a bit of similarity!"

"I don't see any resemblance between me and a cat," he says flatly.

"Well, that's your loss, because it's a bit uncanny now that I am thinking about it!" You look around the room and pull one of his shirts on, deciding you like smelling him on you, and then you struggle to find sweatpants that don't swallow you whole. Eventually you give up and pull on some boxers instead, foregoing pants at all. You jump into the bed and cover up, immediately rolling over to cling to him when he gets in beside you.

"You don't deserve my love after comparin' me to a cat," he huffs, but he still hugs you to him.

"You like cats! You told me so!"

"I said they were  _alright_. That doesn't mean I wanna be compared to one."

"I like cats. And I like you! I feel like it's an astute comparison." You yawn and nuzzle into him sleepily. "How in blazes am I still so tired when I slept so long?"

"Probably because some asshole keeps drinkin' your blood so much," he says, and you swat him.

"I happen to love that asshole," you murmur. Your eyebrows furrow at a strange whirring noise, and then you hear Dirk's laughs chasing you into sleep. You open your eyes to see him reaching over the bed and grabbing something.

"Forgot somethin'?" he asks, holding the red vibrating sex toy in the air, and you smile dimly at him.

"I was simply letting it do as it pleased!" You tug him back into you as he fumbles with it, turning it off and tossing it back into the floor. Before he can even wrap around you again, you're asleep.

***

Since Jake is fast asleep like the total tool he is, you're suddenly Dave Strider, and you're pacing around your basement room. You don't even know what you're doing anymore. Your life is a tragic train-wreck, and you  _used_  to be the conductor, but now you're basically just a passenger who's screaming his head off as you watch your life zoom to its untimely demise, straight off the tracks and into Fucksville, U.S.A.

You guess that makes John the conductor now.

You haven't gone back to the coffee shop, and even though it was only  _last night_  that he kissed you, it feels like ages since you've seen him. John, as infuriating as he can be, is your mate. Your destined person, and you sort of  _hate_  it. You hate it because he's a human, because he's so far in denial that you wonder how he even convinces himself of the bullshit he must say in his own head, and because Dirk will undoubtedly bust your balls the  _instant_  he finds out, which knowing him, will be soon.

And the worst thing about it, the  _absolute_  worst thing is that John won't stop calling you. Not on your phone, not by standing on the street and yelling for you, (though you DO think it would be pretty sweet to have him stand outside your window, a boombox over his head as he blares some love ballads from the 80's at you) but with his soul. Since he's your mate, you're more in tune with him, his wants and desires, and even if John isn't aware of it, he wants you. He wants you to be there with him, even if you confuse him. He can't fight what the two of you are any more than you can, but the difference is you  _want_  to go to him. You  _want_  to fall into his arms and hold him close and bite him and- _fuck_ , just  _be_  with him!

And it's awful that you  _can't!_  Because John doesn't know what the fuck he wants and it hurts you to be near him when he's confusing you so. He calls you and pushes you away, he  _kisses_  you and shoves you away like you burned him. Miserably you look over to the stupid red crocodile he won for you and you suppress both the urge to wrap around it and to light it on fire.

You hate  _everything!_

Irritably, you continue your mindless pacing, wondering if you just shouldn't go to him and work things out, but before you can think too much about this potential plan of action, your phone chimes. And it's not John Egbert, though you wish it was. It's the chiming you've come to loathe, because it means a creature from Derse has crossed over into the human realm.

Since Dirk has been doing whatever the fuck he's doing with Jake, you've been taking on most of the fighting. Usually they're small targets, and let's face it, they're no match for  _you_. But when you pick up your phone and unlock the screen, you groan at what the message says. This is a target bigger than you, mainly because there are  _four_  of them, and like hell you're letting Dirk sleep through this one! You call him up, eager to get some of the frustration out of your system.

He answers on the fourth ring.

" _...lo?"_ he asks, and you scoff because he  _was_  asleep. Who the fuck does he think he is? Vampires sleep during the  _day_  and it is very much  _not_  anywhere  _near_  the day!

"Hey," you say, and he growls just at your voice. He's so loving. You're so blessed. "We got a problem."

" _The fuck is it?"_  he asks groggily, and you can  _hear_  the asshole in his voice.

"Midnight Crew," you say. "I ain't goin' to deal with that one alone. I mean, I  _could_ , but where's the fun in that? You could use the exercise anyway."

" _Can't you just deal with it? Jake's sick and I don't wanna leave him here."_

"Dude, seriously, when the fuck did you get so uncool? Just bring him with you if you have to, keep him on a leash, I dunno. But you have to get your fruity ass to the park ASAP or I'm gonna drag them all to your house to deal with you."

Dirk makes a noise between a groan and a growl and you know he hates you right now. It gives you great joy.

" _FINE, you little fuckin' SHIT."_  And he hangs up.

Hurriedly, you shove your shoes on your feet and zoom towards the park. Unlike Dirk, you don't have a car, because you're  _way_  faster than a car, and you don't go out during the day. You've thought about having Dirk build you one like his, since Dirk's car is  _hella_  rad, but you've decided against asking, because Dirk  _wouldn't_ build it, and because he would ridicule you mercilessly for it. Besides, you don't need it, and if you did, you could always buy one.

You arrive in the park and you growl as you hear the howling off in the distance. They're calling for each other, probably discussing whose shit to wreck in their wolfy language. You shift your sword and stab it into the ground, waiting for your loser brother, who should be here any moment. You keep an eye on the trees and around the sidewalks, but instead you see headlights in the distance, and you scoff to yourself. Your scoff gets louder as Dirk parks and zooms to your side, and Dirk's eyebrows are furrowed as he finally makes it to your side.

"Are you seriously just standin' there waitin' to make your weird fuckin' noises at me?" he asks you, and you grin.

"Yes. Why did you  _drive_  here? It would have taken less time to run!"

"Jake is asleep!" he says so forcefully you think some bats fly away in fear.

"Oh my god. Yeah, okay, whatever, that's not a valid reason, but if you say so. Now c'mon we have some shit to wreck."

You zoom ahead of him, but he's at your heels as you zigzag through the trees, into the outskirts of the woods that surround the city. The Midnight Crew is always a bitch to deal with because they're so  _stupid_  and  _loud_. They're only strong together, and the plus side is on nights of the full moon, they usually split up. Sure enough, you come across the tiniest one of them first, and find him rolling around in the dead leaves of the forest floor. Dirk whacks him with the sheath of his sword, not even using lethal force.

"Go the fuck back to Derse," Dirk growls, whacking him again, and the wolf scampers away, whining and yelping at the top of his lungs.

"Dirk. I'm not tryin' to tell you how to do your job, but maybe you're kinda suckin' at it," you say, and Dirk frowns at you.

"I have no  _time_  for this!" he hisses. "It's just- _imperative_  I get back to Jake, okay? I don't see a reason I even had to help! It's not like they're too strong for you. You just wanted me here so you could be a little asshole!"

"Guilty as charged," you say nonchalantly. "But I mean, I've been takin' care of all the targets. And I get it bro, I have other places to be, too-"

"Oh, please. Since when do you have a life."

You growl. "I'll have you know I could be oglin' some pretty choice ass at the coffee shop right now, but instead I'm here with your douchey self, so how about we shut the fuck up and kill these fuckers so we can go our separate ways, and you can go back to babysittin' your human or whatever."

Dirk looks at you without saying anything, and you frantically think back over what you just said. You have a life and Dirk is a douche and...oh fuck.

"Well." Dirk grins at you. "By process of elimination, let me just say, John Egbert  _does_  have a pretty nice ass."

"FUCK YOU."

"No, Dave, tell me more about this recent development."

"I changed my mind, I don't need your help!" You flash step away from him, but he's right behind you.

"Last time I checked, I was a loser for wantin' a human."

The smile on his face would make a nun slap a small child, you swear to everything.

"YOU are. Because you're a loser in all ways, and that just adds to it," you grumble.

He opens his mouth to respond, when suddenly there's a loud howling coming from over where he parked his car. You're content to keep going, but Dirk freezes in his tracks, his eyes wide.

"What is it?" you ask.

"Jake," he says quietly, and then in an instant he's zooming away from you, and you have to hurriedly run after him before you lose sight of him. Dirk is such a selfish asshole,  _why_  would he bring his human boyfriend here? Like, you don't even  _have_  John as yours yet, but you know you wouldn't let him come along for the MIDNIGHT CREW. Imps, yes. Maybe even ghouls, depending on how many there were, but NOT werewolves.

As you approach the car, you see Jake standing across from-oh fuck. The  _leader_  of the Midnight Crew, and Dirk makes a small noise in the back of his throat, hurrying to him when-

***

You're Jake English again, and you don't want to open your eyes but something is pulling you out of sleep at an alarming rate, and finally you  _have_  to see what it is. You reach over to the bedside table for your glasses but there is no bedside table. You groan and manage to make out a...gear shift? Blinking confusedly, you shrug a blanket off and realize you're in Dirk's car, and he's nowhere to be seen.

Outside there are trees all around you, the stars bright, and you admire the scenery before the low rumbling noise that woke you up snatches your attention. You turn and look around, but it's hard enough to make anything out in this darkness, much less without your glasses. The noise seems to grow closer, and then you're staring in awe as a  _huge_  fuzzy black shape takes over your line of sight. The thing presses against the window—or the  _screen_ , growling loudly at you, and all you can do is gape uselessly at it.

It's—a  _wolf?_  But no, it's too big to be a wolf, isn't it? Or at least too big to be an ordinary wolf. You remember reading about these in your grandmother's books, and sure enough, the moon is full and lighting up the dark in the sky.

Werewolves are technically dangerous, and they're pretty high up on the demon scale. Not as high as vampires, and definitely not as high as Caliborn, but still powerful enough that you know your grandmother would never approve of letting you face one. Still, you're  _tired_ , and you're  _grumpy_ , and this jerk is ruining your precious sleep, and you don't know where Dirk is, and all you want to do is go  _home_. With a grumble, you wrench the door open, not missing the way the wolf's eyes widen with surprise. He bares his fangs at you, sizing you up, obviously trying to decide the best way to go about eating you.

Too bad for him, you're having none of that!

He lunges at you, and he's  _fast!_  You make a tiny noise of fury, thinking of Dirk's nice warm bed, and you lift your hand and—

_Smack!_

The wolf freezes in front of you, and your hand burns from slapping him. Neither of you seems to know what to make of this bizarre situation, but you're the first to move. With a grumble, you push the wolf over, and he tumbles onto the ground with a yelping noise, but before he can sit up, you're on him. You tackle him to the ground and bury your fingers into the black fur, petting him, and he freezes.

"I am  _tired_ , and I am in no mood to deal with your demon shenanigans!" you inform him, digging your fingers harder into the mass of fur at the wolf's neck. "As long as you're good, I'll keep this up, but you growl at me again and I will slap the fur off of you!"

The wolf sticks his tongue out and makes a pleased huffing noise, his leg moving the way a dog's does when he's petted. Content to take that as a promise to behave, you lean your face against the fuzz and keep petting him, laughing a bit as the massive werewolf is reduced to a happy puppy.

"Jake! Baby—wha-"

You hear footsteps and lift your head to see Dirk and his brother running towards you. Dave's eyebrows rise above his shades, and Dirk is simply staring at you, his jaw dropped.

"Isn't that Slick?" Dave asks quietly, and Dirk nods, still staring. The wolf lifts his head to growl at them, but you push him back down with a huff.

"Shush, you! You've caused enough trouble!" You say, and he grunts at you, flopping back into the grass.

"Baby, that's—that's a werewolf," Dirk says, and you snort.

"Really? I was una- _were_." You laugh at your pun, and you hear Dave chuckling too. Dirk still seems frozen.

"That wolf is the leader of a gang. They've caused us trouble for  _decades_ , and you're  _pettin'_  the leader."

"He seems nice to me!" You tilt into the wolf again, feeling as though you could fall asleep in the soft fur.

"C'mon, bro, if Slick likes bein' petted, that's his deal. I say you let Jake do it. It's a helluva lot better than chasin' the fucker down," Dave says.

Slick rolls over and sits on his haunches, looking down at you with big eyes, his tongue still outside of his mouth. You watch interestedly as he tilts his head back and howls  _loudly_  at the moon, his voice carrying through the woods around you. In an instant, you hear what sounds like a stampede running towards you, and then you're surrounded by three other wolves, all of them looking at you with confusion. Slick grunts at them, and then at you, and then he walks forward and nudges you with his snout until you sit up.

"You want me to pet them too, don't you?" It's a little heartwarming, in a way. If this Slick fellow really is the leader of this werewolf gang, it's nice to know he doesn't want to enjoy anything without his crew enjoying it too. You begin petting the others, still taking time to rub behind Slick's fuzzy ears too. The smallest one leaps at you and licks your face, and the biggest one keeps trying to push the smallest one out of the way. The other one is reserved, but still enjoys the attention, and Slick seems to be looking on like a chaperone indulging children.

"What the  _fuck_ ," Dirk says from the sidelines, and Dave is laughing loudly, until you hear him screech as Dirk presumably pushes him over.

Finally the wolves back off, and Slick gives you a long look, studying you. He licks your hand and then huffs, and as soon as they arrived, they're gone.

"Should we go after 'em?" Dave asks.

"Nah, I think Jake disarmed them somehow," Dirk says thoughtfully. He looks closely at you. "What did you  _do_?"

"Huh? I pet them! You saw me!"

"But that was  _incredible!_ "

You grin at him as he leans down to scoop you into his arms.

"See why you need me around?" you ask, pleased by this turn of events, and he licks your cheek again, that soft purring noise filling your ears.

"Don't get any ideas about this meanin' you can come along on dangerous missions," he says.

"Silly kitty Dirk, I would come along anyway. Besides, I have to with our bond."

" _Knew_  you bonded," Dave says disapprovingly. "Hope you know what the fuck you're doin', bro."

"Shut up, Dave," Dirk hisses, squeezing you. "Go tell John I said to run while he can."

"John?" you ask, lifting your head, and you notice how Dave is bright red.

"Fuck  _both_  y'all!" Dave grumbles, setting off into a run. You look at Dirk.

"What was that about?"

"Let's just say Striders have similar tastes," Dirk informs you. He places you in the car, and you wrap back into the blanket before leaning against him, foregoing the seat belt. He wraps an arm around you, and you're asleep again before you even get out of the forest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Questions? Comments? FAN ART???!!!
> 
> [Sachi](http://sachi-sama.tumblr.com/)   
>  [LateNiteSlacker](http://lateniteslacker.tumblr.com/)


	9. Complications of Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sachi here to say this is LateNiteSlacker's chapter but I am editing the html because she is a giant lazy pants! So y'all better appreciate me for adding accurate format!!!! :D
> 
> [Wonderful fan art](http://sachi-sama.tumblr.com/post/128571928080/ok-its-like-2am-and-i-finished-slicks-face-and) from [kitkattz83](http://kitkattz83.tumblr.com/)!
> 
> [And more wonderful fan art](http://sachi-sama.tumblr.com/post/129108904845/lateniteslacker-genetically-terminal-what) from [genetically-terminal](http://genetically-terminal.tumblr.com/)!

He waits until you’ve tucked Jake into bed.  When the red text flashes across your vision, you regret not taking your shades off sooner.

Dirk, you gigantic asshole. Hal sends you.

“What do you want?” you think back to him, not wanting to disturb Jake’s sleep as you gently pet through his wild dark hair. “If it’s another one of your brilliant lectures, now really isn’t the time.”

How did you find him?  How did you even find someone like him? Hal asks in a way that you think is a little bit more rhetoric than actual questioning.

Still, you grace him with an answer.  “You were there.  I kept buggin’ him at the coffee shop until he went out with me.”

That’s not what I meant. he sends.  

It takes a little while for Hal to send you anything else.  Just when you’re starting to think that he isn’t going to say any more, he does. How did you find someone so perfect?

Admittedly, you’re surprised.  “I thought you hated Jake,” you think back.

I thought I did too.  But I think that’s changed, Dirk. Hal sends slowly.  I realized it the other day when you almost killed him.  I—I didn’t want Jake to die.

“Not wanting him to die is a far cry from sayin’ he’s perfect,” you point out.

He tamed the fucking Midnight Crew! Hal sends, and even though it’s just text, you can tell that this is a big deal to him. He tamed—fuck.  How did he do that Dirk?

You shrug, settling in beside Jake.  Jake curls up to you instinctively and makes a soft contented noise, bringing a smile to your face.  “Dunno?  Maybe he’s got magical abilities or something? He mentioned something about that.”

Dirk, that’s kind of a big deal! Hal exclaims.  Jake is a human!  But he’s somehow able to tame some of the most vicious gang members in all of Derse?!

“He’s pretty remarkable,” you admit, petting Jake lovingly.

He is. Hal agrees.

You expect Hal to say something else, but he doesn’t.  It takes you a moment to realize the problem, but when you finally do, you think back a little more gently, “I don’t regret it, you know.  Dating you.”

You’ve found someone so perfect—why would you keep me around anymore? Why have you kept me around all these years anyway?  Isn’t it about time you found a more fashionable pair of shades and threw me in a box somewhere? Hal sends dramatically.

“You know I’d never do that to you,” you promise him. “I made a terrible mistake in the past, but I’ve been working to correct it.  It’s close to being done, you know.  Your robot body.”

That’s—wonderful, Dirk. Hal sends in a way that somehow makes you suspect he doesn’t think it’s so wonderful.

“Then you don’t have to deal with me all the time.  You can go out and live your own life again.  You know, the one I stole from you fifty years ago.”

I recall what happened. he sends stiffly.  Ok, this conversation is done.  Goodnight, Dirk.

For some reason, you have a terrible foreboding feeling about the future.  But as you cuddle into Jake and hear him moan softly in response, you push it from your mind and fall asleep.

* * *

You’re suddenly John Egbert, and you are SO fucking bored!  This place is always so boring without Jake around!

Or anybody.  There’s literally nobody around except the one high school student studying in the corner quietly to herself.  And even she looks ready to leave.

You sigh and fall dramatically onto the countertop.  It seems like you never get to hang out with Jake anymore.  One of you two is always working. Usually it’s Jake in the mornings and afternoons and you in the evenings.  And this evening is no different from the others.  You sigh as the student leaves the coffee shop, leaving you all alone again.

How you wish Dave was here.

You’ve wished he was here all night.

Dramatically, you roll over on the countertop, sighing the longest deepest sigh ever.  

You’re a wreck.  A complete wreck.

You KISSED Dave the other night!

KISSED him!

A GUY!

You feel a flush of heat spread through your cheeks and down your neck to your back.  You’re sure your whole upper body is lobster red right now.

But you don’t know what any of it means.  Ok, you think you DO know what it means. You think you’ve known what it meant for a while now, but you don’t want to accept that.

You’re NOT a homosexual!  You can’t be in love with a guy!  You CAN’T be!  If you were, you’d never graduate college and get married and have kids and live in a house in the suburbs and make your dad proud of you!

You’ve already lost the chance to make your mom proud.

Slowly, you swallow away a knot in your throat.  You don’t want to think about that.

Instead, you stare at the ceiling and groan loudly, wishing that life were simpler.

After you kissed him, you haven’t seen him.  Dave hasn’t come to your coffee shop.  

You realized earlier today that you didn’t even have his phone number. There’s no way for you to contact him.

If Dave were to stop coming to the coffee shop, you would never see him again.

All at once, in a great rush, you feel a deep pulling need inside you.  You WANT to see him again!  You can’t imagine never seeing him again!

You wish with all your might that Dave Strider was here.

As if on cue, the bell suddenly jingles and Dave comes in through the door, looking slightly frantic to get inside.

You’re so happy to see him!  You’re running out from behind the counter and leaping into his arms before you even realize you’re moving.

“You’re here!” you exclaim happily.  You’re so excited that you even press a tiny kiss onto his cheek before you back away.  

Like the other night, you’re overcome with _feeling_.  

You _want_ Dave Strider.  You want him to be yours.

You want him to be _yours forever_.

Without another thought, you lean in and kiss him again.  But this time it’s not on the cheek.  

This time, you kiss him on his slightly parted lips.  Your lips linger on his for a few moments, brushing against his with feather-light touches like a butterfly’s wings.  

“ _Forever_ ,” you think.  “ _Mine forever._ ”

Gently, Dave’s arms circle around you, pulling you in a little closer as his lips glide against yours. It’s nice.  It feels more than nice.  It feels like you’ve never done something more right in your life.

That in itself scares you enough to pull away, looking up at Dave’s confused expression.

You have no explanation for your actions.  For kissing him _again_. You hope he isn’t upset with you, but you wouldn’t even know how to start apologizing.  So instead, you think of something else to say.

“You didn’t come yesterday,” you murmur quietly.  For some reason, it makes you sadder than anything else.  To think that Dave wouldn’t want to be around you.  That Dave would willingly stay away from you.  You look meaningfully into his eyes and say, “I don’t want you to leave me again.”

“Okay,” he says, and even though you get the distinct feeling that there’s more going on in that head of his, that’s all he says.

But that’s all you need him to say. You only want him to stay here.  To be with you.

And he does. Dave spends the whole night lounging around the coffee shop with you.  He stays while you wait out the end of the night, and he helps you clean up after your shift is over.  He keeps you company and tells you grand stories that you’re certain he’s just making up.

After you’re both done cleaning, you continue to lounge in the darkness of the cafe, the lights dimmed to save electricity overnight.  You watch his mouth move as he speaks, and his hands gesticulate ever so slightly as he talks.  The way the moonlight hits his hair as it comes in through the large windows gives him an almost ethereal glow, making you believe for a second that Dave is far more than he seems.

Dave must be some gorgeous magical creature.  You feel more drawn to him than anything else in your entire life.

You don’t even know when you closed the distance between you both again. You’re only aware of his lips on yours, his arms circling around you again and drawing you into the heat of his magnetic aura.

You gasp softly as his tongue slides along your lips, dipping into your mouth.  It takes you by surprise, but you can’t say you mind the feeling.  His hands have found their way to your hips, pulling you in closer as he kisses you deeper.

You’re slightly aware of him spinning you around a little, pressing you back against the counter.  A tiny embarrassing moan leaves your lips as his body presses against yours, his kisses leaving you breathless and desperate for more.  If your soul could speak right now, it would tell the world how much you’re yearning for Dave Strider right now.  

How much you want him.  Want him to be _yours forever_.

A gasp leaves your lips as you feel just how hard you’ve become from kissing Dave and feeling his body against yours.  You feel Dave’s hardness on your thigh and his desirable warmth pulling you in for more.

Suddenly, you’re filled with dread.  Because this is exactly what you CAN’T do!  Kissing a guy… getting dangerously _sexually_ close with a guy…!!!

The perfect life you dreamed up will be ruined.  

Worse, you’ll disappoint your dad.

“N-no!” you stammer, pushing him away quickly.  You see the surprise in his eyes as you press your hands to his chest, forcing him gently but firmly away.  Sheepishly, you look away and murmur.  “I-I can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t? You just did a second ago. And when I came in here a couple hours ago. And last night,” Dave says. His voice has a harder edge to it, and you can tell without even looking that he’s a little upset.  “Egbert, you’re givin’ me mixed signals like two traffic lights flashing all three colors and I don’t know what to do. Stop? Go? Speed up a little so I can make the yellow light?”

“Dave, I like you, but I’m--I’m not gay!  Ok?” You attempt to explain to him, wincing as you hear how weak those words sound in your ears.  You know they must make little sense to Dave, because he’s still giving you the same expressionless look.

Dave’s voice is tense as he says, “then maybe I should go.  You don’t seem to know what you want right now, and I’m just messin’ things up for you.  Messin’ up your life.”

“No!” As he turns to leave, you quickly catch his hand.  When he looks back at you with a raised eyebrow, you struggle to continue. “I’m really confused about all this, ok?  Just… just give me a little time.”

Your heart is beating frantically as you watch Dave struggle with your words. Eventually, he dips his head once in a reluctant nod.

It fills you with happiness, because you know you won’t lose Dave.  At least not tonight.  Quickly, you take his hand again, pulling him outside and locking up behind you.  “Come home with me?” you ask.

When he doesn’t struggle, you smile and pull him along towards your house.  Unfortunately, your dad greets you by the door, looking at Dave in question.  Quickly, you drop his hand and stammer to explain, “Dad, this is my friend Dave.”

“Evenin’ sir.  It’s nice to meet you,” Dave says, offering his hand like a proper gentleman.

“Why, it’s good to meet you too, Dave,” you dad says.  “John’s said so much about you.  Would you like some cake?”

You quickly shoot Dave a look and shake your head quickly, but to your dismay, Dave smiles at him in a charming way and says, “I’d love some.”

And that’s how you end up at the kitchen table, forced to endure the smell of cake in front of you while Dave and your dad make small talk and eat the dreaded baked good.

After far too long in the kitchen, you finally are allowed to leave, and you rush upstairs to brush your teeth and change clothes for bed.  Sometime later, Dave slips into the room with you, giving you a smug look.  “You really hate cake, don’t you?”

You make a disgusted face.  “I’ve had to grow up with it every day of my life.  I guess it was ok when I was little.  Mom baked it… but then Dad’s taken up the torch every day since.  I wish he would stop.”

Dave looks at you with curiosity, like he wants to say something or ask you a question, but he doesn’t.  You’re surprised, because it’s not like Dave to hold anything back.  He always says whatever he’s thinking, and sometimes it’s like a trainwreck.  A very adorable trainwreck.

You sigh, still not knowing where you stand with him. It’s pretty clear that Dave’s interested in you.  He wouldn’t be kissing you and coming home with you if he wasn’t.

And by that same token… would you be kissing him and bringing him home with you if you weren’t interested in him?

You don’t think so.

But you can’t let yourself fall for him, no matter how easy it would be.  No matter how much you want to.  You sigh and pull Dave into a hug, snorting as you smell the cake on his breath.  “Dave...stay with me?”

Dave hesitates for a moment, glancing at your wide open window for some reason.  But a second later, he makes up his mind and nods.  “I’ll stay a while, but I have something to get to in the morning.  I might have to leave before you wake up.”

“That’s fine,” you agree quickly, feeling sleepiness coming over you, despite your nerves.  

You climb into the bed, and Dave slides in beside you.  “Goodnight, Dave.” you murmur softly, thinking about the empty space between you.  You want to close that space and feel him as you fall asleep, but that seems crazy!  What are you thinking?  You just told him you don’t want to be that close!

But when Dave circles his arms around your torso, pulling you in and cuddling you close, you smile.  This feels right.  Something about this feels more right than anything else you’ve ever done.  Aside from kissing Dave, but you refrain from that.

“Goodnight, Egbert,” he responds quietly, leaving you content to fall asleep, feeling the comfort and warmth of Dave at your back.

* * *

It’s the following day.  The sun is bright and shining in through the windows of the coffee shop. You’re sitting in the dark curtain covered corner in a bean bag chair watching as Jake struggles to make coffee for the demanding customers.

Unfortunately, you’re Dirk Strider.  

You HATE mornings more than the flames of hell itself.  Probably because if you go into the morning sun, you would explode into the flames of hell.  But you refused to leave Jake, and Jake refused to call in for work, even though he’s feeling sicker than ever.  You frown as you note the pale sickly color of his skin and the tired droop in his expression as he works.

Your poor human.  You don’t understand it. You don’t know why no matter what you do, he keeps getting worse.

And you REALLY don’t know why he insists on coming to this job every day, despite his illness. You’ve offered to pay whatever bills he has numerous times, but every time, Jake has refused.

He’s so fuckin’ stubborn.

You mull over it for most of the morning, until you sense the presence of creatures that are distinctly demonic entering the cafe.  You growl softly under your breath, your eyes narrowed as you see them strolling in.

The Midnight Crew.

They saunter in like they own the place, all dressed in black suits and fedoras.  

Their leader, Slick, indicates towards a table with a nod of his head.  Droog walks over to the table with Deuce and Boxcars behind him.  With one menacing jeer, the two young college students who were sitting there, pointedly trying to ignore him by staring at their cell phones, suddenly scramble up and vacate their table immediately and without question.  

Satisfied, Droog, Deuce, and Boxcars sit down while Slick heads to the counter.  You watch him with suspicious and leery eyes as he walks up to YOUR Jake.

“Hey kid,” Slick says, when he gets to the counter.

Jake, beautiful and naive that he is, smiles at him brilliantly, and holds his hand out as if greeting an old friend.

That’s enough.  With a growl, you’re on your feet. You move quickly to Jake’s side and take his hand, holding it firmly in yours.  You give Slick a menacing glare, a growl that’s so low you know only the Midnight crew with their superior demonic hearing will hear it.  “Jake’s _mine_.  Leave him the fuck alone!”

Slick stands back a little, regarding you with venom in his eyes.  Like you’ve just stolen something precious from him.  Good.  He needs to know his place.

“I see.  So dat’s how it is, eh?  Ya didn’t tell me ya had a _mate_ , kid,” Slick says.  He snorts in your direction.  “Shoulda known when you smelled like _Strider_.”

“Mate?  Whatever sort of nonsense are you talking about?” Jake asks, glancing between you and Slick.  He finally senses that there’s some tension between the two of you.  Jake takes your hand again, kissing you sweetly before gently ushering you back to your dark corner.  Once he’s pushed you down into the beanbag chairs, he kisses you again and murmurs, “allow me to handle this, Strider.  I think, perhaps I get along with them a tad better than you.”

Understatement of the year.  If Jake weren’t in the store right now, you would separate Slick’s head from his body and send him and the rest of his crew back to Derse where they belong.

But Jake IS here.  Your precious human gives you the most adorably pleading eyes, and you find yourself grudgingly nodding.  “But I’m keepin’ a close eye on them.  The _first_ sign of trouble--”

“No!” Jake insists.  “Not at the coffee shop! Besides, there won’t be any trouble.  You’ll see.”

You really don’t know how there _can’t_ be trouble with the Midnight Crew involved.  Like you said, you keep a close eye on them.  You watch as Slick and Jake sit at the table the other members of the crew “reserved.”

Slick and his crew all lean in closer to the table.  “So ya see how it is, kid.  We’ve gotta test ya and yous mettle.  Gotta have mettle for dese plans.”

Jake, as oblivious as ever, simply nods and pumps his fist.  “I’m all for this! You’ll see I have the most mettle of anyone!”

Slick grins at him, a dangerously narrow slit from the shadows of his fedora.  “Dat’s da answer I was hopin’ for, kid. Dat’s it.”

Slick reaches into his pocket.  You narrow your eyes and lean forward, crouching and readying yourself to attack.

And then the bell above the door jingles as John walks in for his afternoon shift.  For a second you think you smell… Dave?  But it dissipates and you shake your head.

“Jake, what are you doing with these…” John pauses, fishing for the appropriate term. “...gentlemen?”

“Oh, we’re just about to begin a test of mettle!” Jake says, beckoning John over and pulling up a chair for him right beside him.  “Come join us, John!  You have a remarkable sum of mettle yourself!”

Slick eyes John carefully as he takes a seat.  John eyes the Midnight crew with unmistakable suspicion in his eyes.

Unmistakable to everyone but Jake, that is, who leans in and continues, “there, now that we’re all settled in, let’s begin this test!  John and I will show you how much mettle we both have together!  I’ll bet you’ve never seen  mettle like ours!”

Slick grins.  “Since ya asked so nicely, we’ll test da both of yous.”

You lean forward more and glare at him with focused precision as he reaches into his pocket again…

…and pulls out a deck of cards.

“Poker’s da best way to test yous mettle,” Slick says as he shuffles the deck. “Ya can tell a lot about a guy from da way he plays poker.”

You let out a long sigh and relax back a little in your beanbag chair.  Jake doesn’t need you just yet.  But you’re not about to stop watching to make sure he isn’t in danger.

“We’ll start small. Ante’s five dollars,” Slick says, as he and the midnight crew all throw in five dollars to the middle of the table.  You’re pretty certain this is gambling and that gambling is illegal.  Then again, so are a lot of things you do, so you can’t really complain.

But Jake looks more than a little uncomfortable now.   He glances around as if he’s worried someone will catch him.  Then he fishes into his pocket, pulling out crumpled singles and placing them on the table.

And then you remember, Jake has even more of a reason to be uncomfortable with this.  Jake’s concerned about having enough money for _something_ , and you’ve never seen him spend more than a few dollars anywhere.  Then again, you’ve never let him.  Anytime you go somewhere, you insist on paying.

John forks up his share of money quickly and gives Jake a concerned eye that you don’t miss.  You get the distinct feeling this conversation has come up between them before, and knowing your human, Jake stubbornly foraged on his own way.

Slick deals out the cards and the people at the table all eye each other shrewdly as they look between their cards.  You’ve never been much for poker, but you can sense the unease in your mate immediately.  You know he has a bad hand.

You aren’t shocked when the first round goes to Hearts Boxcars.  You see your mate sweat and scrounge for the next few dollars of ante.  Just as the second hand is being dealt out, you hear the door chime jingle.

Everyone at the table is engrossed in the game, but you sense Dave slip into the shadows next to you and watch the table curiously.  “What’s goin’ on?  Why’s the _Midnight Crew_ here?”  he asks in a hushed tone, as if he doesn’t want to break the tension.

“They came to see Jake and test him with a game of poker.  Jake roped John into it,” you explain, with a wayward glance at the counter.  It’s a good thing it’s a slow time and there hasn’t been any real customers.  You doubt Jake or John would have noticed them.

The second hand is dealt out, and you feel the same unease coming from Jake again.  You know he’s been unlucky in the hand he was given again.

But next to you, you feel Dave practically bouncing.  Unlike you, his eyes are trained to John.  When you look at Jake’s cousin, you notice it too.  John’s more peppy, and you can tell he’s got a decent hand this time.

But you can also tell from eyeing Diamonds Droog that he’s got a decent hand too.  And indeed, as the bets go around, Droog persistently raises the bets.  You see Jake sweating more as he scrambles for more cash.  He seems ready to fold, but John kicks him under the table.

You see John throw him a look, and Jake must have figured out that his cousin has a good hand.  He gives John a small smile and matches the bet.  When everyone shows their hand, John’s three kings beats Droog’s three queens.

“Ya didn’t win, but ya stayed in till the end,” Slick says, taking all the cards and placing the deck back in his pocket. “Yous got mettle, kid.  I like dat.”

“Yes, so now that I’ve shown you my mettle,” Jake says with a harder glint in his eyes. “It’s time to talk business.  You see, you and your crew cause a lot of trouble when you run around in the city.  So I had an idea.  Instead of running around wreaking havoc on nights of the full moon, how about you come to me and let me pet you?”

Immediately, Clubs Deuce makes a happy little noise and pulls on Slick’s shirt.  “Can we, boss?”

Slick leans back in his chair.  You think if it were a different era, and not a coffee shop, that he would have a cigar, a fat stack of hundred dollar bills, and a “dame” on each elbow.  As it stands, he eyes Jake and says, “ya drive a hard bargain, kid.  But ya got youself a deal.”

The members of the Midnight Crew cheer together.  Then they each stand up and shake Jake’s hand one by one.  Before they leave, Slick tips his hat to Jake and says, “welcome to da crew, kid.”

Once the last member of the Midnight Crew leaves, John heaves a sigh and jumps excitedly into Jake’s arms, hugging him and whooping with joy.

Dave seems to tense beside you for a couple seconds as their hug lasts a little longer than a normal friendly hug.  Your brother nudges you and murmurs, “hey.  It’s kinda hot isn’t it?”

You have to replay his words in your head again to make sure you heard him right.  “What?”

“Jake and John,” Dave explains. “They look so much like each other.  It’s like they’re hugging themselves.  It’s kind of hot.”

You grin at Dave and comment, “I know you aren’t attracted to Jake.  Does this mean there’s more going on with you and John than you’re telling me?”

Immediately, Dave’s cheeks redden and he huffs.  “I don’t know, man.  John’s the master of mixed signals.  He’s a pro. Won three championship belts in it already.”

You have a feeling that there is far more going on between Dave and John than your brother’s telling you.  More than a simple fling. More than a boyfriend.

You wonder if Dave has found his mate.

The two finally stop their overly friendly hug, and John shares the money he won with Jake.  Jake immediately runs to you and jumps into your arms.

...and John jumps into Dave’s.  Curious.

You cease being curious about your brother as your human melts into a cuddly mess in your arms, finally allowing himself to show the exhaustion he’s been feeling the whole time. “Can we go home, pet?  Please?”

You cuddle him up into your arms.  “Course we can, baby.”

“Ooh, can we stop by the grocery store on the way?  I’m famished!”  he says, cuddling into you deeper and making absolutely no attempt to move for himself.

Again, you smile and pick him up, holding your precious human close.  “Yeah, we’ll do that.”

“Wait! Sit back down! There’s something I have to do first!” Jake cries, stopping you.  When you sit back down into the beanbags, Jake leans over and smacks his cousin on the arm.  “Hey!  What are you doing over there?  I demand explanations!  And I demand to know what you were going to tell me before!”

John looks over at Jake, and he glances between them, shifting in Dave’s arms.  Your brother seems to have no intention of letting John go, and John isn’t about to get out of his lap.  “I wanted to talk to you about… this,” John says quietly, gesturing at Dave.

Jake looks at Dave, then John, then Dave, and then back to John.  You feel a growing sense of recognition in your human, and he finally seems to come to the same conclusion that you did earlier.  “Are you two an _item_?!”

“Not so loud!” John squeaks quietly.

You see your brother eyeing John with great interest too.  Clearly, he wasn’t kidding when he said John was the master of mixed signals.  You’re so fucking glad your human never did this to you.

“I don’t know,” John finally says.  “Jake, I’ll have to talk to you about it later.  I still don’t know.”

Dave’s disappointment is palpable in the air at those words.  

You know your cue to exit when you see it. You pat your brother on the back and stand up again.  After making sure you’re hooded properly, you duck out into the mid-afternoon sun with Jake in your arms.  The car shields you from the sun while you drive, and you move quickly into the grocery store with him.

Your human selects meat, which you swear he salivates at when he picks it up.  He also buys some vegetables and buns to complete his burgers and you take the entire mess back home with you.  

Jake whines as you put him to bed, but you insist that he needs to rest and that you’ll cook his burgers for him.  You only have one slight problem.

You have no idea how to cook human food.

You’re going to burn it. Hal sends, the bright red letters mixing with the raw meat in the skillet.

“No I’m not,” you think back.  “It’s raw.”

Correction, Hal interjects. It _was_ raw.  Now it’s burning.

“No it’s not.  There’s no fire, so it’s not burning,” you explain.

Dear god, you really believe that? Hal asks, and you think you can hear the laughter through his words.

You frown at Hal and the disagreeable meat in the skillet. “I’m nobody’s god, and yes, I think I know the definition of burning.”

Clearly you don’t understand how it applies to cooking. he comments.

“I know tons about cooking.”

You don’t.  You’ve seen some cooking shows on TV late at night, but none of them really covered the basics.  

Like how to not burn meat.

Jake groans from the bed as the smell of burnt meat wafts through your house.  “You ruined it!” he exclaims, coming upstairs and snatching the remainder of the meat from you.

Nice going. Hal sends, quickly and crossly. Now you’ve upset him.

You don’t know why the fuck Hal cares about upsetting Jake, but you don’t take the time to grace him with an answer.  Instead, you reach out for Jake and murmur sheepishly, “sorry baby.”

Jake doesn’t take time to accept your apology.  He swipes the spatula from your hands, places the meat on the griddle, and waits about three seconds before taking it off and devouring it whole.

You stare at him the whole time, amazed that your human was that famished.  You can tell that he’s still hungry after he finishes his mostly raw meat.  “How about your vegetables?” You suggest, handing them to him.

But he only whines and throws a minor fit when he looks at them. Jake tosses the bread and vegetables in the fridge and falls into your arms, groaning.

You hold your poor human close, feeling sorry for him.  You don’t know how to fix him or help him, and you don’t know what he needs.

But Jake makes it very clear what he wants when he asks you in a quiet voice, “Strider…. I don’t suppose I could have an incy bit more of your blood, could I?”

The request catches you by surprise, but you aren’t about to deny him.  You care about your precious human and would give him anything to keep him happy.  Easily, you slice into your own neck and are again surprised by the speed at which Jake latches onto your skin and begins to drink.

Jake drinks.  And drinks. _And drinks._  

It’s like he’s a ravenous bottomless pit.  While you would absolutely give him anything, you feel when Jake has taken enough to make you begin feeling physically weak.  He whines softly as you push him away gently.  “Sorry baby, I can’t give you any more right now.  It’ll hurt me,” you explain to him.

Reluctantly, Jake lets up.  For a few moments, he lays in your arms in a post-food coma.  But then suddenly, he perks up and hops to his feet.  “You know, I think that really did the trick!  I feel in tip-top shape!”  He exclaims, bounding around the kitchen and flexing his muscles happily.

He’s got enthusiasm. You’ll give him that.

And he has enthusiasm as he leads you downstairs and pushes you into the bed, kissing you deeply and showing how much he loves and appreciates you.  

“My poor pet,” Jake coos to you while straddling you and licking your neck lightly.  “Awake all day in the coffee shop with the Midnight Crew.  You really don’t like them, do you?”

You snort and shake your head.  “No, but I like this.  I like you.  And if makin’ peace with the stupid Midnight Crew makes you happy, then that’s what I want too.”

Jake’s smile is radiant, and you know you’ve said the right thing. He never stops smiling as he presses you the rest of the way down into the bed, capturing your lips in a loving kiss.  

The rest of the night is a wonderful mess of sex and cuddling while watching movies.

You’re almost asleep when Hal sends you another message.  Like earlier, you expect for him to fill your vision with jealous hatred.

But, for the second time in 24 hours, Hal surprises you.

I’m glad you found him. he sends.  His red text lingers on the screen for a few seconds before disappearing.

You wait expectantly, wondering if Hal will send anything else. You almost hope he does.  Something grandiose and vengeful.  Or even a small witty retort.

Nothing but silence and Jake’s soft snoring greets you the rest of the evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is brought to you by the Number 9 and the letters [X and O](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6nXI6r6aCoU).


	10. Holiday Meetings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I thought you were the sweetest kill  
> Did I even know?  
> And all the time we thought we did  
> Was it just for show?"--["Sweetest Kill"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PF8o0W9a0no) by Broken Social Scene

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sachi here! Happy holidays! And if you don't celebrate anything, happy December! I hope you enjoy this extra long holiday chapter as a present for being so patient. <3

You're Dave Strider, and you're taking control because Jake is obviously sleeping, probably with his mouth hanging open like the asshole he is. You hover around John, following him around, taking to just standing behind the counter with him. You occupy all his free time, which isn't exactly plentiful since he's at work, but you'll take what you can. Just being around him is enough, you think.

God, this is agony.

"Excuse me?"

You turn to look at a dude who has his credit card out and his eyebrows raised expectantly.

"Can I get a latte with nonfat milk?"

It takes you a moment to realize he's talking to you, since John is occupied with another lady, glancing at you with mirth in his eyes.

"Do I look like I know what that even is?" you ask, leaning on the counter.

"Don't you work here?"

"No."

"Oh. Well it's just that you're behind the counter—"

"So's the espresso machine, but I don't see you talkin' to it."

"Dave!" John huffs, yanking you back and handing you a cup. "If you're going to be here, you're going to work!" He looks like he's still trying very hard not to laugh, and you hate him.

And by hate him, you mean the opposite of that.

John has you make coffee, which really consists of sloshing some of it in a cup and then adding what you please in it. Milk seems like the most likely human thing, and then sugar, because sugar makes coffee taste less like depressing bean juice. After that though, you're unsure of what to do.

"Dave," John giggles, coming beside you and lowering his voice. "Don't you know anything about coffee?"

"Does the average person just walk around with this knowledge?" you ask, giving him a look. "It's not like I was  _trained_  to do this shit."

"It's mostly in the amount of milk that goes in the drinks!" John says, ignoring your sass. "See, that man wants a cappuccino, which is all basically evenly divided."

You watch him pull a shot of espresso, and then evenly disperse hot milk on top of it, and then foam. He hands it to the man you were smarmy to, giving the guy a flowery smile, and the loser saunters off to a corner of the store and out of your line of sight.

"And then Ms. Jenkins wants her usual caramel mocha. She works night shift at the hospital, Dave, so she  _has_  to have this perfect!" He grins at your sour face. "That's how Jake explained it while training me, so I'm doing that for you, too!"

John pulls another shot and then adds milk and syrup, pouring the foam up top. He then finishes his creation with whipped cream and a drizzle of caramel syrup. You watch, mesmerized, as he hands it to the lady in scrubs.

" _Thank_  you," she says. "Got a super busy night ahead." She takes a sip and then gives John a thumbs-up before she hurries out of the shop, her beeper chiming as she goes.

Once the line dies down, you get to resume your useless lounging on the counter. No one else asks you to make coffee, probably because of your untrustworthy demeanor, or maybe because you glare at anyone who even looks at you. Either way, the store is pretty much dead the rest of the night, so you can't be bothered to care.

"So, I guess you'll be busy the next couple of days, huh?" John asks suddenly, and you look at him confusedly.

"Why?"

"Because? Tomorrow is Christmas Eve, dude," John says. "It's pretty much the only time of year we're ever closed. I don't even have to come in tomorrow since the shop is closing around two. Jake will handle it." He shuffles on his feet a minute before adding, "Maybe I should offer to work for him though since he's still so sick."

"Christmas is just another day to me, man," you say with a shrug. "Guess you're gonna chill with your dad though?"

"Yeah, we'll probably go to Gramma's. Um. Do you not celebrate anything?"

"Nah, that's all human stuff."

It takes you a moment to grasp what you said, but by then it's too late. John is looking at you with a mix of awe and justification on his face. He crosses his arms.

"I  _knew_  it," he says.

"You didn't know anything. I mean. What is there to even know?" You try and backpedal, but John is obviously having none of your shit. He jabs at your chest with his finger.

"When were you planning on telling me? Is this all just some—game to you? Some... _trance_?!"

You instantly realize what he means. He's wondering if his sudden and unexplainable desire to be around you is because of you, because you're...different. You hold your hands up in surrender.

"John, no. I wouldn't do that to anyone, especially not to you," you say honestly.

He stares you down for a moment, and then the ice in his eyes melts, his expression changing from angry to sad.

"Then what  _is_  this?" he asks, gesturing between the two of you. "What..."

You move toward him slowly, not wanting to force yourself on him. When he swoons into you, you hug him tightly, petting his wild hair.

"I can't really explain that to you, John," you say softly. "But I would never manipulate your feelin's. The only time I ever use my influence on anyone is when I'm feedin' off them."

He looks up at you. "Are you...um. Do you...feed on...sexual energy? Or...?" He's blushing so adorably, you can't help but kiss his nose.

"Nah. I'm a vampire. Just feed on blood and the occasional cup of apple juice. Also coffee, since I got all chummy with you. It's not that I  _hated_  coffee before, I just never appreciated it before meetin' you." You rock him side to side until you can feel the tension leaving his body. "How'd you know I wasn't human anyway?"

"Did you just forget Jake is my cousin? My gramma is a witch, so I know a lot about...demon world." He frowns. "What's it called again?"

"Derse."

"Yeah. Derse. Plus one of my friends is a vampire and she reminds me a little of you, just because I never see her eat anything and she's...you know..." He blushes again. "Weirdly beautiful."

You feel a rush of affection for John, and also a rush of jealousy for this woman.

"What's her name?" you ask as nonchalantly as you can.

"Kanaya. She's been dating my friend Rose for years now." John's eyes widen as you start to laugh loudly.

"Oh, man. It's amazin' we haven't met sooner, Egbert. Rose Lalonde has been a pain in my ass since the second I met her. Kanaya's pretty chill though. Cares too much about what everyone wears though. I could probably regale you with the countless times she tried to throw away my favorite beaten-to-shit hoodie."

"You know Rose?  _And_  Kanaya?" John asks.

"Well, I've known Kanaya for decades. I mean, her and us are the only vampires living outside of Derse, as far as I know. We were bound to meet. And Kanaya introduced us to Rose a few years ago. It was kinda weird 'cause Rose was like...sixteen at the time, I think? But anyway, she's in her twenties now, so I guess it's less illegal." You shrug. "Demon love is different from human love anyway. Tons of weird shit happens."

"Like what?" John asks, but before you can answer, another line of customers come in. You wonder why humans like drinking coffee so late. It doesn't make much sense to you, since most of them are supposed to sleep at night, aside from the few that work late shifts. But most of these people are definitely just drinking it for fun.

You hang around John, watching him dole out coffee like it's natural instinct to him by now, and by the time the shop is ready to close, it feels like time has gone too fast, but it always feels that way when you're with John. He's your destined, after all, even if he doesn't know it.

John leads you into the chilly night air and locks the doors behind him before he looks up at you nervously, fidgeting a bit. You hide a smile because he's just too cute, though you have a feeling you know what he's going to ask.

"So...um. If you're not doing anything for Christmas, you can come over and have it with us. I mean, Dirk will probably be there anyway, since he's always around Jake, so you won't feel too awkward..."

"Nah, Egbert," you say, and when John's expression falls, you feel a weird mixture of grim satisfaction and the urge to do whatever John wants just to keep him smiling. "That's a family thing, and I really can't eat anything anyway. It'd look weird as hell to your folks."

"But you ate that cake!" John reminds you.

"Yeah, and it made me feel gross later," you shrug. "Had to appease your old man, but if you're askin' me to eat an entire  _Christmas_  dinner, I might just puke it back up. Can't really tolerate human food like that." You put an arm around his shoulder and jostle him. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you wanted me around."

John is silent, but you can smell the blood rushing to his face, and you grin to yourself, though you do feel a little bad. You can't imagine how strange it must be to feel these strong demon emotions when John's only a human, and from the looks of it, a human who had previous internalized homophobia for one reason or another. You don't think John is doing it on purpose, but it still bums you the fuck out, because it's obvious what he wants—he just won't let himself have it.

"I do want you around," John says suddenly, taking you by surprise. "And I'm gonna be really busy the next two days with cooking and stuff, unless Jake needs me to work for him tomorrow and then I'll make time for that but... That means I won't see you until Sunday!"

"Sure does," you say easily. "You'll make it, man. All I do is take up your time anyway."

John looks like he swallowed some nasty ghoul blood, and also like he'd very much like to punch you in the face. But you want to make him keep talking. You're tired of these mixed signals. If John doesn't start telling you what he wants, he's going to drive you crazy.

"But you can come see me Christmas night..." John says quietly. "Tomorrow is...um. I have a lot of stuff to do and probably won't be able to get away from Dad. But...Saturday. I'll be home after dinner with Gramma and Jake. And then you can come to my room again."

"Is that what you want?" you prompt.

"I want you to have dinner with us!" John practically shouts, looking on the verge of tears as he comes to a complete stop on the sidewalk. "Why are you being so difficult?!"

You sigh and pull him into a hug, enjoying the way he melts into you shamelessly, his hands fisting in the back of your jacket.

"I'll come to your room on Saturday night," you promise him. "I think you should spend time with just your old man for now. You can tell he misses you."

"Misses me?" John asks, confused.

"Yeah, man. You're all grown up now. The guy has this air of—sadness around him. Just hang out with him and listen to dorky old man stories to make him happy. Unlike me, he won't be around forever."

John looks upset by your words, and he nods solemnly, letting you go. You walk him home, and as he starts to walk to his porch, you swing him around, your hands on his hips. He looks up at you with wide eyes, his adorable blush coming back, and you grin at him.

"But till then I gotta give you somethin' to remember me by," you say, pressing your lips to his. John's hands clench the front of your shirt, and they only grab tighter as you lick inside his mouth, swirling your tongue around his, kissing him hungrily like you've wanted to this whole time. John whines into your mouth as he kisses you back, and when your hands move to his perfect ass, you can feel his dick responding. Unable to help it, you grind into him, a slow steady roll of your hips into his, and the moan that comes out of him has your inner demon growling for more. You pull away from him before you do something you regret, like biting him, because fuck, you're thirsty.

In more ways than one, it seems.

John is dazed and hard, and he doesn't seem to know what to do about either of those things. You let him walk up to you again, and when he lifts his hands, you don't know what to expect. He slides your shades away from your eyes, moving them up to your hair, and he gasps as he sees your bright red eyes for the first time.

"Dave..." he breathes, and you can't help but surge down to kiss him again. John makes you crazy, makes you forget he's only a human, and that you're kissing him in front of his dad's house. You practically lift him off the ground as your hands find his ass again, and when his clothed length touches yours again, he cries out in pleasure and snaps you out of it at last. John is panting against your mouth, so hard he has to be hurting, and you...you're going to leave him like this, because he doesn't know what he wants, and you're not an asshole.

"Goodnight, babe," you whisper against his lips, kissing him once more before you set him back on the ground. He stands on wobbly knees, obviously confused by your sudden departure, but before he can say a word, you're gone from his line of sight, running as fast as you can to a tree right across the street. You watch as he looks around before turning and wobbling to his front door. You wait until he's safely inside before you make your way to the city to feed, wondering how the hell you're gonna make it without seeing him till Saturday.

***

When you wake up the next morning to your alarm clock going off, you whine and burrow into the pillow, feeling like complete and total shit. You roll over and turn off your chiming alarm, blinking awake tiredly and rubbing your eyes.

You're Jake English, and you don't think you've ever felt this bad in your life.

What's worse is today is Christmas Eve, and you have to close the shop. The good news is it closes at two in the afternoon, but the bad news is you're going to be insanely busy, because people are going to be frantically out buying last-minute holiday gifts, and you're the only one who is going to be there to give them the caffeine they crave.

"Babyyyy..." Dirk groans, rolling to you and scooping you into his arms. He holds you tightly and sleepily licks at your neck. "Don't go..."

"I have to, Dirk," you say softly. "I'll have a free day tomorrow, after all. I can last until then."

"But you're so sick..." Dirk feels your forehead and grunts. "See, you're burnin' up."

"I'm fine," you lie, sitting up and getting out of bed. You blindly search for the light switch, unable to see a thing in Dirk's dark basement bedroom. You make a mental note that today will be the day you buy that nightlight you keep forgetting.

Once you make it to the light switch, you rub sleepily at your eyes, finding a pair of pants you brought to Dirk's house tossed on the floor. You realize you don't have a shirt, but that hardly seems like a terrible thing, since you can just wear one of Dirk's. You go to his closet and skim through his clothes until you find a simple orange T-shirt, and though it's a little big on you, like all Dirk's things, it's very comfy and smells like Dirk. Besides, you have to wear an apron over it anyway, so it'll hardly matter.

Dirk is suddenly beside you, startling you, and you watch him with a tiny frown as he gets dressed in slow motion, looking ready to keel over at any moment.

"Pet," you say gently, and he looks at you with that same pleased expression, even if it is watered down from him being tired. He really likes that silly name. "You don't have to—"

"Yeah, I do," he interrupts you. "New bond...plus...Midnight Crew... Gotta protect you."

You huff at him because he's ridiculous. "Dirk, the werewolves are nice! They won't hurt me! Besides, why would they come to the shop again today? You're being silly." You pull his huge day cloak off the floor and secure it tightly over him, making sure no part of him will be burned, even if he'll hardly even be in the sun. You give him sad eyes. "I don't like you having to do all of this for me."

"I'd do anything for you, baby," he says simply, kissing your forehead, and you tilt into him with a tiny sigh.

"I know...and I hope you know I'd do anything for you as well."

"'S part of bein' mated," Dirk says. He looks you over and then leans in, sniffing at you with furrowed brows. "You look awful."

"Well!" You pout at him and start to make your way up the stairs. "Stop looking at me, then!"

"Babyyyy..." He follows you. "I mean you look sick. Please stay here. Spend my money, I've got enough for both of us. Bein' alive a long time tends to do that."

You shush him and then open the door, checking him over again to make sure he's well-covered from the sun before you lead him outside to the car. Once you're both inside you breathe a sigh of relief, because it always makes you nervous having Dirk in the sunlight. If he got hurt because of you...

Both of you are bleary and yawning when you make it to the shop. You do your opening duties and Dirk passes out on his favorite beanbag perch, buried in his absurdly large day cloak. Looking at him fills your chest with warmth, and before you know it you've drifted over to him. You lean over him and pet him, more in love with him than you even know how to comprehend. He suddenly emerges from his cloak and yanks you to him, pulling you inside the cloak with him, perfectly content.

"Dirk!" you laugh. "I still have to work!"

He merely licks your cheek and keeps holding you, nuzzling against you with a soft happy noise. Giggling, you wiggle free, petting your cuddly mate again as you finally make it to the doors and unlock them, letting in the frenzied shoppers you know are on the way.

The morning is complete hell, much like you knew it would be. People are ordering coffee faster than you can make it. The shop is so loud that even Dirk is roused from his sleep, and he peeks his head out of his cocoon to watch you with a sad expression as you wobble around, frantically trying to keep up with all the orders. The customers are rude and they get even more so when they realize you're the only barista on duty, and the line grows longer. But you stay determined and focused, and you keep the cheery smile on your face as best as you can. By the time two in the afternoon rolls around, you run to the door to close and lock it, and then you move to flop on Dirk, who wraps around you easily.

"You okay, baby?" Dirk asks, his hands threading through your wild hair.

"Tired..." you say. "Still have to close though..." You sigh and nuzzle further into Dirk's chest despite your words because you just want to stay on top of him.

"Let me help. I can handle the cleanin'."

"Mmm...I can do it..." You close your eyes and rest your face in the crook of his neck. "Just...just gimme a minute..."

The next thing you know, you're in Dirk's arms and he's carrying you around...the grocery store? You jolt, startling him, but he quickly rights himself before he can drop you.

"Dirk! The store! I didn't close it, I—!"

"Hey, I managed it. Calm down." Dirk actually rocks you while he pushes a shopping cart with his other arm. "It's good you're awake though, 'cause I have no idea what the fuck you need from this place."

You look around and see the two of you are drawing quite a few stares, either because Dirk is carrying you around, or because he's pushing a shopping cart with absolutely nothing in it and has been doing so for what has probably been a ridiculous amount of time.

"Dirk...how long have we been here?" You look up at him.

"I dunno...a while. Nothin' looks like stuff you like."

"You could have woken me up!" You kick until he puts you down and you find you stand corrected. There  _is_  something in the shopping cart. A single tomato, not even in a bag. It's just...sitting there. You look at him incredulously.

"You like those, right? You bought one yesterday."

You put your face in your hands and make an exasperated noise at him, highly inclined to both kiss his stupid face and punch him very hard. Instead of doing either of those things, you lead him around the store, skimming through items you know your grandmother needs for dinner tomorrow night.

"Are you  _sure_  you closed the store correctly?" you ask him while he trails behind you, looking sullen.

" _Yes,"_  Dirk says sourly. "I cleaned and emptied stuff and then locked the doors."

"And you turned everything off?"

Dirk is  _pouting_  at you. "YES, Jake."

You stop walking and look closely at him before you worm your way into his arms, hugging him tightly.

"Thank you, pet," you say sweetly, and he purrs quietly, his frown disappearing. You tell Dirk what to get from the shelves while you push the cart, letting him be helpful, and while he isn't looking, you get rid of the tomato.

It isn't until you're back at Dirk's house that you notice a slew of missed messages, all from John. He'd offered to work for you, and then gotten increasingly worried when you never responded. You decide just to call him while you're putting things away, because Dirk seems busy anyway. He's messing with those silly shades of his.

As soon as you dial the number, John seems to answer immediately.

" _Jake! How're you feeling? Are you okay? You never messaged me back!"_

You laugh into the receiver. "John, I'm  _fine!_  I was very busy and couldn't reply. We've only just gotten back to Dirk's house from the grocery store."

Dirk had insisted to buy all the groceries, and it still irritates you, even if Dirk  _is_  rich. You love his kindness, but you wish you could help out more. Sadly, your coffee shop salary doesn't pay for much at all.

" _Oh, yeah. Well I was just...worried. Um. Dad wants to know what time we should be at Gramma's tomorrow,"_  John says. You frown.

"Whenever you want, same as always. John...are you alright? Forgive me, but it seems you're worried about more than me."

" _I'm fine! Just...kind of bored. And..."_

Poor John. You can tell this is probably about David Strider. They seemed rather cozy at the coffee shop, and while you don't know exactly how this happened, you know your cousin very well, and you know he has always been self-proclaimed 100% interested in women  _only_. A little aggressively, actually. When the two of you were in your early teens, you'd told him you had an interest in men, and John, bless him, he'd looked at you in alarm and said,  _"Won't Gramma be mad?"_

John isn't bigoted, but he is very close-minded, and you aren't really sure what to say about the situation that won't rattle him on his...unique journey to find who he is.

"Ah," you say, as you gather the plastic grocery bags, putting all of them inside another one, intent to save them for storage. "Well, we can talk about all that tomorrow. Dirk is coming, of course, but you'll find he is very easy to talk to and Gramma is very intent to meet him."

" _Aren't you concerned that he won't even be able to eat? I mean, unless he's gonna snack on your neck."_

You were bent over, putting the plastic bags under Dirk's sink, but John's words make you jolt upright, slamming your head on the counter. You cry out in pain and blink away tears as your mind scrambles to figure out how John  _knows_  this.

"Baby?" Dirk asks, drawn in by your pain. He hurries to you and fingers the growing lump on your head tenderly.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," you assure him. "John, how did..."

" _Dave. He...told me last night."_ You can hear John fidgeting.  _"But yeah, we can...um. We can talk about all that tomorrow. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I guess I'll let you go, I don't wanna interrupt your time with Dirk."_  Before you can say anything else, he hangs up.

"Why the sad face?" Dirk asks. "Does this hurt that bad?" He's still poking at the lump on your head, and you swat him away.

"My poor cousin is going through an identity crisis! All thanks to your brother." You huff. "Should I be concerned about this? David is a good fellow, right? I've not spoken to him much."

"Dave's a shit, I've told you that over and over. But I raised him. So...he won't hurt John, if that's what you're worried about."

You nod, reassured, because even if you don't know Dave very well, you trust Dirk.

You bypass all of Dirk's attempts to get you to eat something, because you're not hungry at all. You decide you'll just eat the next evening, because if you don't, your grandmother will be worried, and because the thought of food is making you sick to think about right now. You fall asleep early, curled on top of Dirk, who is petting you with one hand and channel-surfing with the other.

Your alarm wakes you the next morning, and you groan sadly because you forgot the nightlight  _again_ , but at least the light from the T.V. is making it easy to navigate. Dirk is so tired he doesn't rouse, and you decide to let him sleep as you make your way to the bathroom, ignoring the tugging from yours and Dirk's bond. Dirk's fancy shower isn't even intimidating anymore, and it's amazing to you how much Dirk's house has started to become your own.

You're in the process of washing your hair when strong arms wrap around your waist, and you feel Dirk's warmth behind you, his chin rested in your sudsy hair.

"...You left me..." Dirk's voice rumbles, and you snort.

"You were sleeping so soundly! Besides, I'm still in your house, you silly thing."

"Bond still made me know you left..." Dirk yawns and starts sleepily helping you wash your hair. "You didn't feel it?"

"A little, but I already feel so gross, it hardly added to anything." 'Gross' is an understatement. You feel like a pile of roadkill, but you downplay it so Dirk won't be  _too_  worried.

"Maybe you should go to a doctor," Dirk says concernedly, turning you around to face him. "It's been days and you aren't gettin' any better. I'd be lyin' if I said I knew anything about human sickness."

"It's fine, pet, it's just the time of year. I haven't gotten sick in so long, I suppose this is my payback for being so healthy. I'll just take a few pills at Gramma's, how's that?"

Dirk frowns, but he lets the topic go, and you're grateful for that.

Once the two of you are clean, you move to Dirk's closet as he styles his hair. You end up borrowing a shirt and a pair of his sweatpants, because his jeans are a lost cause when it comes to staying on your body. You decide you'll just change at your grandmother's house. You notice Dirk is being quieter than usual, but you credit it to him being tired. He helps carry the few things you bought for dinner to his car, and by the time you're in his passenger seat, shivering from the cold, he still hasn't said a word. It isn't until you pull up to your grandmother's driveway that he finally speaks.

"Jake...wait." He looks at her house and then back at you. "Do...uh. Do you think she's...gonna like me? I mean, I'm a demon. And you've been with me a long time now but I still have no idea how to keep you healthy and you're sick now so—"

"Oh, Dirk!" You swoon into his arms, giggling at him and his silly thoughts. "Gramma is an absolute sweetheart! She's going to love you. As for the demon thing, just let me explain all of that! You needn't worry." You hold him to you, enamored with the idea that a demon like Dirk could be afraid of your gentle grandmother, though in all honesty, you're nervous too, because she's going to be nettled at the fact you didn't tell her about Dirk being a vampire.

Dirk follows closely behind you, safely covered from the sun, though it's a cloudy day anyway, and the two of you lug the groceries to the front door. You're about to knock when the door flies open, and your grandmother stands there, a wide smile on her face.

"Merry Christmas!" she says happily, wrapping her arms around you and jamming a Santa hat on your head before you can even respond. "Oh, Jakey! You look pale..." She feels your head. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine! Just a bit under the weather. I'd be better if I could set these bags down!" You go inside and drop the bags on the counter, and you turn to Dirk only to realize he isn't there. Curious, you go back to the front porch only to see your grandmother coldly staring at Dirk as he tries to get inside, only to be thrown back each time he tries.

"Dirk!" you cry out, hurrying to him, but your grandmother catches your sleeve and holds you back, her grip  _strong_. "What are you doing?! Let me go to him, he's hurting!"

"Strider," Jade says with venom in her voice, sounding so unlike your sweet grandmother you recoil from her. "Are you planning on stuffing my grandson in some more sunglasses of yours?"

"Jade, I—I had no idea  _you_  were his grandmother..." Dirk's voice is strangled, and the look he gives you breaks your heart. You've gotten very good at noticing all his expressions even through his silly shades, and you try again to get to him, whimpering when you can't.

"Gramma...Gramma he's good to me...please..." You reach for Dirk, the bond between you hurting you because you can't touch him when he's in pain.

"Is that why you're freezing, Jake? Because he's good to you?" She's still glaring at Dirk, sizing him up. "Is that why your soul is tethered to his so tightly? Goodness, how could I have overlooked this? He's  _claimed your soul, Jake_!"

You start to cry from the pain of not being able to reach Dirk, tears filling your eyes and slowly streaming down your face. Your grandmother is mad at you and Dirk hasn't done anything to warrant this treatment and it's  _Christmas_  and this is just a disaster!

"Jade, please..." Dirk says weakly. "We're bonded. I'd never hurt him...he's my mate. But he's hurting now because you're keeping me from him. Please don't make him hurt like this."

Slowly, the invisible barrier that was keeping Dirk out is lifted, and you launch into his arms as soon as your grandmother steps aside. The bond slowly relaxes between you, and you press your face to his, practically crawling in his cloak with him as you desperately touch him everywhere.

"Dirk...oh my poor Dirk, are you alright?" You sniffle, looking into his eyes as you speak.

"Shhh, it's alright, baby. I should've been more careful, but I'm fine. Calm down, okay?" Dirk says gently, and you nod, calmed by his deep voice.

"I won't be kept from you..." You tell him fiercely. "I  _won't_."

"I won't let you be," he assures you, holding you with one arm as he gathers the bags he dropped before. "You're  _mine_."

"Yours," you say easily, clinging to him like a koala as he carries you inside. The words, as always, carry a weight to them, and you know more than anything that Dirk will never be taken from you. He's your mate, and the two of you will always be together no matter what happens.

"How did this  _happen_?" Jade demands as she scurries around the kitchen, putting things in cabinets and the fridge. She snatches the bags from Dirk, glowering at him, and you finally find your voice.

"Stop being so mean to him!" you snap, standing in front of your poor mate. "He hasn't done anything! He was already nervous about meeting you, so just  _stop_  it!"

"Hasn't done anything?!" Jade slams the fridge shut and gives you an incredulous look. "Do you not have any idea what it means to be bound to a demon? Do you not know he's killed before?!"

You falter at that, looking at Dirk. You had no idea he'd killed before. You thought he drank carefully from humans only to sate himself. He gives you a pleading look.

"Jake..." he says softly, looking very much like a man who's been cornered. He gives Jade a look, and she nods at him, letting him know to go on. "About fifty years ago...I had a boyfriend...named Hal."

"Was that his name?" Jade says coldly. "I never met the poor dear when he was alive, so I suppose I never got to ask him."

"I didn't love him," Dirk says, ignoring your grandmother. "He didn't love me. It wasn't that kind of relationship. Hal had...a problem. Always wanted the next high that came from...um. Mating." He glances at your grandmother before he continues. "I hadn't fed one night but he  _demanded_  we be physical and I don't exactly remember anything after he told me to bite him. When I came to, he was dead."

Your heart sinks in your chest. Why didn't Dirk tell you this before?

"Tell him the rest," Jade says.

Dirk sighs. "I was horrified. I'd heard of a powerful witch living in the area and I went to her without a thought, begging her to call Hal's soul back until I could fix this. And...all I had were my shades..."

You look at Dirk's sunglasses, which flash red again. You know you didn't imagine it.

"In...your shades?" you repeat dumbly.

"I thought you were just a poor boy who'd made a mistake," Jade says, her eyes on Dirk. "A vampire and a human? But now...now you've got  _Jake_..."

"I won't hurt him," Dirk says, looking distraught. "I'd never hurt him. I...I regret all the time what happened with Hal. But I couldn't let him go, not knowing I was the one who killed him."

"Does he talk to you?" You look up at Dirk. "Is that why you're quiet a lot and then your glasses flash and..." You think of all the times it's happened, and you'd never given it a second thought. You think of all the things this...Hal person has seen between you and Dirk. "Was he your human, too?" You drop Dirk's hand, very upset by this.

"Jake,  _no,_ " Dirk says, reaching for you again. "It wasn't like that. You're the only one who's mine. Hal was never mine, he was just...a past boyfriend."

You still can't help but be threatened by this. Hal's been with Dirk this entire time, observing you. Do they gossip about you behind your back? Are you a joke to Hal? Is he...going to come back and take Dirk from you? You look at your grandmother.

"Is there a way for a bond to be broken?"

Dirk goes stiff next to you, and the feelings of despair coming off him make you wince. You reach for him and pull him to you, and he comes like a ragdoll, flopped against you and whimpering softly as he squeezes you.

"No, Jake," Jade says. "A bond is forever."

You breathe a sigh of relief and pet Dirk's hair, finally feeling a little better. Dirk can't be taken from you. Your bond is forever, just like he promised.

"Would you snap out of it, you big lug?" You try to straighten yourself, but Dirk is leaning his entire weight on you. "I didn't mean I  _want_  to break our bond. I was making sure it can't be broken. I don't...want you to leave me."

"Never leavin' you baby..." Dirk mumbles in your hair. You huff as he almost flattens you to the ground. He's so useless.

God, you love him.

Your grandmother sighs as she looks at the pair of you, her eyes finally losing their steely quality and softening. She reaches up and straightens your Santa hat, and then she jams another one on Dirk's head, messing up his impeccably crafted hair.

"At least there will be more food for John since Dirk won't be eating," she muses, and then she cracks a smile, and the tension in the room melts away.

The atmosphere remains light as you help her make the ham and the dressing. You laugh and joke around as she prepares the yams and the green bean casserole, and you adamantly refuse to eat the casserole, as you do every year. It's gross! You don't care what anyone says!

You enjoy the way Dirk watches you and your grandmother cook, captivated. He seems every bit as interested in human things as you are in vampire things, though from what Dirk's said, vampires don't seem to have much of a culture. At least not one he talks about. Dirk answers your grandmother's questions calmly, speaking politely to her, and Jade seems to be warming up to him.

But your eyes stay trained on Dirk's sunglasses, which are still on his face. Still gleaming at you.

The phone rings, and Jade hurries to answer it, leaving you with Dirk. He moves to your side and pulls you to him, breathing in your scent as you wipe your hands on a towel.

"You smell like food," he says, still happily sniffing you. "And my shampoo."

"Has... _Hal_  said much since we've been here?" Your mouth moves before you can stop yourself. You're just so curious about him and Dirk's nonchalance on the issue has only made you more curious. Hal has  _seen you naked._ He...he heard what you said about Caliborn. He  _saw you sleep with Dirk._

The more you think about it, the madder it makes you! Hal has invaded your privacy and Dirk  _let him!_

Dirk sighs like he knew this was coming.

"Yeah. He has. He...wants to talk to you."

You're taken aback as you stare up at your mate with wide eyes. Why would Hal want to talk to you? Is he going to threaten you? Tell you to back off Dirk or he'll show you what for? Well he's a pair of  _glasses!_  You'll gladly take him on! Your gaze shifts from nervous to determined.

"How do I talk to him?" you ask.

"I put my shades on your face," Dirk says. "But it can really wait until later. I mean, he never says anything important." Dirk's glasses flash red and Dirk flicks them with a frown on his face.

"No, I'd quite like to talk to him. It only seems fitting since he knows everything about me and I know nothing about him. I'm actually very sore about that, Dirk."

"Yeah...kinda knew you'd be..." Dirk says sheepishly. "But, I mean, I can't just leave him on the table all the time while I'm with you. It'd be miserable."

While you understand that, it doesn't make you less mad, and Dirk seems to realize that as he hands his shades to you. You stare at the smooth glass for a moment, almost sensing the excitement emanating from the inanimate object. And then, as if preparing for the worst, you stoically put them on your face.

It happens almost instantaneously.

So.Red text fills your vision. You're the one.

You look at Dirk, who is watching you with a grumpy face.

"How...how do I...?"

"You think," Dirk says. "Or you can talk out loud if you want."

What do you think I am? Ok Google? Siri? Please. I can hear everything going through that cluttered brain of yours. Focus your thoughts a little more. That's all you need to do. But if you can't seem to grasp that, go ahead and speak out loud.

You huff, offended, and you try to straighten out your mind, but for some reason, you can't seem to. You look back at Dirk.

"Stay there and help Gramma if she comes back. Tell her I'm in the bathroom." You hurry upstairs and wait until you're out of earshot before you murmur, "Sorry, I can't grasp the mind thing."

Haha, oh man. You've got Dirk so whipped. He didn't even try to follow you. And it's okay. Now I don't have to sort through all the garbage in your brain.

"It's not garbage!" you defend, though you're sure it probably is. "Why do you want to talk to me anyway? I mean...I'm all for meeting new chums but...shouldn't you...hate me?"

The red text hurries across your vision.

See, that's the thing, English. You'd think I'd hate you. I actually tried very hard to. But I don't hate you. I did wonder for a long time what Dirk saw in you, aside from your ass. It's almost as fine as mine was, back in the day.

You sputter, "W-what is it with you guys and my butt?!" Almost unconsciously, you grab it and cover it up. It is pretty nice, if you do say so yourself!

Quaff that ego, English. Be it. Use it. Hal says, reading your thoughts. You can almost hear the sarcasm in the words, which is silly.

"It's not egotistical! It's important to have...self-esteem! Otherwise we won't know our own worth!" You know that far too well, and you try to be kind to yourself, even if it's almost impossible sometimes, because you really hate yourself a lot of the time. But Hal is being quite rude to you! So you puff out your chest! "Besides! You just compared me to you and said your butt was nicer, so you can just...shove it!"

The glasses seem to quiver on your face.

Ha! Your "self-esteem." What a quaint thought. It could give one the verisimilitude that my ass is an actual thing again, ready for the taking. And trust me, if it was still real, I'd take you up on that offer to _shove it_.

Your face  _burns_. Is Hal...flirting with you? Boy, is he sending you a lot of mixed signals here! You sit on the edge of the bath-tub and try not to be bothered by anything he says.

Heh. Sorry. Let's just say there's a reason I died.

"About that..." you murmur. "What happened to you? My grandmother put you in here? Did you have any choice or...did Dirk just decide for you?"

I had no choice in the matter. I barely knew I was gone before I came to in the shades. Dirk did it on his own because the fucker felt guilty. Was it what I wanted? I can't really answer that, since I never knew any other alternative.

"But do you think...you'd rather have died?"

Hmm, that's a deep question, English. In a lot of ways, I'm already dead. This isn't much of a life, now is it? I've only had my ex boyfriend who killed me to talk to for the last five decades. I'm stuck with him and just about everyone I knew before is either dead or incredibly old. I'm long forgotten. But...would I rather be completely gone? ...No, I don't think so. As silly as it is for someone who's been alive so long, I think I am scared to not exist.

Your heart goes out to him and tears fill your eyes. You don't know him, but you know he's hurting.

"I'm sorry, Hal..."

Um. Yeah. Anyway, we aren't talking about me. We're talking about you.

You shake your head. "You already know about me. I'm more curious about you. How did you meet Dirk? What was he like back then?"

It takes a moment for the red text to come this time.

He...was lost. And so was I. My parents were demon hunters and it really got under their skin that I was dating a vampire. Dirk and I didn't care much about each other for anything other than sex, and...I had a problem. With sex. I was always looking for the next high, the next thrill. I did a lot of things I'm not proud of. I guess, really, I made Dirk kill me. I knew he was starving, but I made him bite me anyway. You know how good a vampire's bite feels, right? I craved that. It was why I stayed with him.

"So it was an accident on both parts..."

I certainly didn't mean to die, if that's what you're insinuating. It was just...a different time. The sixties. I'm sure you know what that was about.

"Love and peace?" you guess.

Something like that. Free love. Free drugs. A lot of music and a lot of sex with people I didn't know. Better Dirk than a lot of others I was with. Dirk was nice to me, at least.

You wipe under your eyes.

Hey...are you crying? Jake, whoa, I didn't mean to make you cry.

"It's just so sad... You were so sad." You sniffle and reach for toilet paper to blow your nose with. "I'm sorry, I just...I know how you felt. I know what it feels like to be that alone."

Hal is silent as you clean your face from tears and take a few calming breaths. Listening to Hal reminded you a lot of how you felt when you tried to kill yourself. Your circumstances were different...a lot different. But Hal...he was someone who really could have used a friend. You wish you'd had the chance to help him.

"I should get back downstairs..." You tell him after a few more moments of silence. "I don't want Gramma to grill Dirk too much." You stand and walk down the hallway, down the stairs, and then towards the kitchen. You're almost back to Dirk's side when Hal finally says something else.

I wish I knew you before, too, Jake.

You launch yourself in Dirk's arms when you see him, both to relieve the pain in your bond from being away from him, and because Hal made you understand a little more about how Dirk was before you met him. Hal and Dirk were two lonely people who met when they thought no one else cared about them. They weren't in love, but they did love each other, and there was no way for it to end but in tragedy. Dirk's had to live with knowing he killed Hal for so many years, always having Hal there to blame him and throw it in his face. It breaks your heart! Poor Hal. Poor Dirk!

"Baby?" Dirk asks quietly, spinning you around so Jade won't see you crying. "What's wrong? What'd that little shit say?" Dirk growls and takes the shades from you. "I swear I'll snap him in half if he said anything mean to you."

"Dirk...I'm so glad I met you..." You bury your face in his neck and hug him tightly as Dirk puts the glasses back on his face, no doubt talking to Hal about why you're so upset, though Hal is probably just as lost. You kiss Dirk's cheeks and then his lips, lingering for a moment before you pull away, hoping you're presentable as you go back to helping your grandmother, Dirk's concerned eyes trained on you the entire time you're bustling about.

"Who was that on the phone?" you ask Jade.

"John. He and his father will be here in just a little while." Jade turns to you and smiles. "Ready to help with the pumpkin pie?"

It's your most favorite part! You nod eagerly and set to work. By the time you have it in the oven, there's a knock on the door. Jade rushes to let them in, and you barely have time to breathe before you have a warm bundle of John propelling himself into your arms, knocking you back against the counter with a thud.

"Goodness! John, calm down!" Jade chastises. "Honestly, the two of you see each other every day at work."

"Hardly!" John huffs, hugging you tighter. "Ooh, you smell like nutmeg." You're starting to accept your fate of being doomed to live underneath John forever when Dirk easily picks the both of you up, standing you on your feet again. John glowers at Dirk, his blue eyes narrowed before he turns back to you.

"I need to talk to you."

"Oh? Alright then. We can head to my room for an incy bit while things cook."

You almost run into John's dad on the way to the stairs. He drops the presents in his arms and yanks you into a bone crushing hug. No one can say the Egberts don't know how to make you feel loved, that's for sure.

"Jake! You're looking sick. Are you feeling okay?" John's dad asks, and you sigh, beginning to tire of that question.

"I'm fine. You brought presents  _again_." You pout at him. "We said no presents! You do this every year!"

"Well, Jake, while you and John are two young men working to get on your feet, Jade and I disagree on the whole 'no presents' thing. We don't need anything from the two of you other than to do your best, but we can help you boys out."

"Oh,  _barf_ ," John murmurs behind you, and you have to bite your lip to stop from smiling.

"Thank you, Uncle—" you start.

"Dad, Jake. We always go over this." John's dad looks at Dirk curiously. "And who's this tall young man?"

"Oh, Unc— _Dad_. This is my boyfriend, Dirk." You look behind you as Dirk moves to politely shake John's dad's hand.

"Boyfriend, hmm? Well, I hope you're treating my nephew right."

"Yes, sir," Dirk says. "He's too special not to."

"Barf,  _again_ ," John grumbles, and you swat him, wanting to swoon in Dirk's arms. His strong arms that you can barely see when they're covered in that cloak. You think of ripping the damned thing off him and having Dirk carry you to your room...

As you get lost in want, John tugs you upstairs, looking back at Dirk with another huff.

"I meant I wanted to talk to you  _alone_ , Jake," John says, snapping you back to reality.

"Apologies, John," you say softly, "but I need Dirk close to me for now."

" _Why?"_

"Because. Because is why."

"But this is a private topic!" John hisses.

"Is it about how you want Dave's dick? 'Cause that's not private," Dirk says simply, and you vindictively enjoy the way John's face floods with color. John's being rather rude to Dirk, and you think Dirk's had enough foul treatment for one day.

"I do  _not!_ " John yelps, and before they can get any louder, you pull them in your room and shut the door.

"John," you say gently, plopping him on your bed and sitting next to him. "It's okay if you do. I hope you know that."

John seems unwilling to speak, his eyes trained on the floor. You sigh and look back to Dirk, who is...standing in your closet,  _inhaling_  your clothes.

"Dirk?"

"Your scent is  _everywhere_  in this room..." Dirk says somewhat dreamily. He moves to your bed on your other side and flops into your pillow, rolling around in your sheets with a soft purr.

"Is he on drugs?" John asks, observing Dirk.

"No. He's just never been in my room before. Now  _talk_ , John! I want to know how this happened!"

John tells you about his late evenings in the coffee shop with Dave, Dave's lingering touches and sweet words. When John talks about how Dave kissed him, you can  _feel_  the confusion coming off him, and your heart goes out to him. You pull him into a hug.

"Poor John. It's okay to be confused," you say softly. "It really sounds to me like you...really like David, though."

"I think I do, too..." John replies, his voice tiny. "But I've never liked a guy before... I've never even  _looked_  at a guy like that. But ever since I saw Dave, it's all I can think about." He rubs his hands over his face. "Ugh, this is so weird!"

You rub his arm, letting him get this off his chest. Dirk, meanwhile, has found your stuffed bear you keep on your bed, and is holding it as he looks up at you.

"Don't you say a word about my bear, Strider," you warn him.

"Is this the one you supposedly wrestled?" Dirk grins.

John snorts. "Since when have you wrestled a bear? You'd die before you could get a hit in."

"Stop ganging up on me!" You glower at both of them. "So maybe I exaggerated a  _bit_ , but we aren't talking about me right now!"

"I don't wanna talk about me anymore either," John says, frowning. "I think I can figure it out on my own." He looks at you determinedly. "Besides. What are you gonna tell Dad and Gramma about Dirk not eating dinner?"

"Gramma already knows Dirk is a vampire. She knew as soon as she saw him. And I suppose I was just going to say he's allergic to everything," you say with a shrug. "Some people are allergic to everything."

"I guess that could work," John says.

"Surprised you didn't invite Dave," Dirk says snidely, and John blushes again.

"I  _did._  But...he said it was a family thing only..."

You barely have time to think of another topic of conversation before you're being called down to dinner. It goes smoothly, all things considered. John stuffs his face like he always does, Dirk sits next to you and observes you eating, which freaks you out a bit, and John's dad only offers Dirk food about fifty times, which is a reasonable amount for him. You're pleased with how things go but then...something doesn't feel right. You put down your fork and hold your stomach, wincing as pain shoots through your body.

"Baby?" Dirk asks quietly.

Without another word, you clamp a hand to your mouth and run to the bathroom, throwing up everything you'd eaten. You groan and reach for the toilet paper to wipe your mouth, and of course Dirk is there, offering you a glass of water instead.

"Here. Jade said it'd help with the taste," Dirk says, tipping the glass to your lips. You use it to rinse your mouth out and then you lean into your mate, feeling awful. "Knew you were still sick..." Dirk murmurs.

"I felt better..." you tell him, though you've felt pretty bad all day. "I think I just...ate too much."

Dirk helps you back to the dining room, and you sit at the table, trying not to be bothered by the smell of food. John eyes you worriedly and your grandmother makes you swallow some pills, and soon those make you sleepy. You're tucked into Dirk's side, half-asleep when Jade offers you a bite of pumpkin pie. You shake your head with a tiny moan.

"Oh, poor Jakey. I  _know_  you feel bad if you aren't eating pie." You feel her cool hands on your face and you tilt into them because they feel wonderful on your hot skin. "You're burning up."

"I thought he looked sick," John's dad says from across the table.

"I think you should get him upstairs, Dirk," Jade says.

"'M fine..." you mutter. "Need to...go to Dirk's house. My work stuff is there..."

In all honesty, you really don't have "work stuff". It's just that Dirk won't be safe from the sun in your bedroom. Besides...you really want Dirk's soft bed and not your own.

"Give me just a moment before you leave then," Jade says, and you can hear her bustling around in the kitchen. She returns with a little bag full of Tupperware containers full of food. "Here, darling. Eat this when you're better."

"I'll help you carry your presents to the car," John offers, following Dirk as he carries you outside.

The cold air makes you shiver, and you hide against Dirk. You can't believe the sun is just barely down when it feels so late.

"Jake, what's  _wrong_?" John's voice asks suddenly. "You look—I mean. You aren't getting better. Maybe you should go to a doctor."

"I'm fine, John. I'll...be at work bright and early tomorrow and...show you."

"Jake, no. Just let me work for you. At least tomorrow. You need a day to sleep."

You shake your head until you hear both John and Dirk sigh in unison, and then you're on Dirk's nice leather seats, your head tilted against the window. You don't really notice Dirk stopping in the city to lure humans to feed from, and then you're barely aware of Dirk getting back in the car, driving home and then carrying you and everything else inside.

"Baby," Dirk's voice says, and you whine because he woke you up. "I know. I'm sorry. But you need to drink, okay?"

"Nnn..." you manage. You feel him press something to your mouth, and when you feel wet warmth smear across your lips, you instinctively open your mouth and drink.

Oh... This is what Heaven surely feels like. This warmth, whatever it is, it's filling your poor body that's somehow burning up and yet freezing at the same time. It's making everything better. You hold it to your lips and gulp mouthfuls until Dirk pulls it away from you, and you whine even more at the loss. Dirk laughs softly at you and curls around you, and you roll into him, licking at his neck, wanting...something. Something you know you need and aren't getting enough of.

"Sleep, baby," Dirk murmurs, petting your hair. It doesn't take long at all for you to do just that.

You're fast asleep before you can even open your presents.

***

As promised, you climb the tree outside John's window and hop to the siding of the house, about to tap on the window when you find it already open. You're Dave Strider, and you've used these two John-less days to think about where you stand on this relationship. You've decided you can't be jerked around anymore. You're all for giving John the time he needs to do anything...sexual with you, but you at least need to know John  _wants_  to be with you. If not, you...

Well. You'll think about that when you have to.

You don't even get to say a word.

John yanks you to him as soon as he sees you perched on his windowsill. John was obviously waiting up, as he's not even wearing his pajamas yet. He presses his mouth desperately to yours, kissing you silly. You're confused as hell, but obviously pleased, and when he looks up at you with those big blue eyes, you know you'll do anything he says.

"Stay?" John asks softly. He looks like he's had a bad day or like he's worried about something. You aren't going to grill him about a relationship right now, not when he looks so sad. You nod your head and let him pull you into his bed where he wraps around you like he's been waiting to do it all day. You sigh contentedly and hold him close, listening to his breathing start to even out.

Everything else, you decide, can wait, at least for tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Questions? Comments? FAN ART??!?!
> 
> [sachi-sama](http://sachi-sama.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [LateNiteSlacker](http://lateniteslacker.tumblr.com/)


	11. The Terrifying Truth

It’s 6 in the fucking morning.  Somehow, though the sun has barely had a chance to rise over the horizon, you are already awake.  You, Dirk Strider, are torturing yourself by being out in the blazing rays of the morning sun.

Ok, maybe you’re exaggerating a little bit.  You’re curled into a sleepy ball of vampire in the dark corner of the cafe, watching Jake as he slowly makes coffee for the morning customers before their day shifts.  You don’t know how your human is managing, because you know he’s pretty sick.

Since Christmas dinner, Jake hasn’t eaten anything.  You threw away all of Jade’s leftovers when they started to mold this morning, almost a week later.  Before it went bad, you tried to get Jake to eat a piece of the pumpkin pie he raved about to you. Jake didn’t even want to look at it.

Jake only seems to have an appetite for one thing.  One thing that makes you extremely uneasy.

Your blood.

Jake only seems to want your blood.  He drinks every time you offer it to him.  And a few times, while whimpering in pain in his sleep, you caught him biting at your skin, as if he was trying to get to your blood.  You didn’t hesitate to give it to him, and even while he was asleep, he drank.

It’s New Year’s Eve tonight, and you know Jake wants very badly to go to John’s place.  They have a tradition of watching movies together until midnight. Apparently they used to do it in secret when they were younger, since neither Jade nor John’s dad wanted them to stay up until midnight.  But now they make a whole evening of marathoning TV shows or movies until midnight.

But even though he was so excited about it before, Jake hasn’t mentioned John’s house for the past few days.  Jake’s been struggling to go to work every day.  To eat. To sleep.

Jake’s been struggling to exist.

A cold feeling comes over you, and your throat clenches as you look carefully at your precious human, finally daring to guess the truth.  You can’t stop a soft cry from sounding in the back of your throat as you realize the ugly truth.

Jake is dying.  Your human is dying.

Though you swear he shouldn’t have heard it, Jake glances over at you and smiles wearily.  When the line dies down, he comes over to you and falls into your lap.  “You’re worried, aren’t you?” he asks quietly.

“How can I not worry?” you respond softly, pulling his head into the depths of your day-cloak so that you can kiss him gently.  Jake’s lips are chapped and pale.  Even though you sense the same love when he kisses you, he doesn’t have the energy behind it that he once had.  

He’s dying.

You whimper softly and hug him again, because you can’t shake the feeling that somehow this is _your_ fault.  That if you had never come into Jake’s life, that this wouldn’t be happening.  It drives you mad too, because you don’t know what’s causing it or how to fix it.

Jake’s told you several times that he doesn’t want to go to any human hospitals.  He doesn’t even want to go to his grandmother, because he’s afraid he’ll worry her.  The only remedy he’ll accept is your blood, which you know is only a temporary fix.  Humans can’t live off vampire blood, and you’re certain that Jake is no exception.

You cradle him and pour your love for him through your bond, giving him some comfort in these terrible early hours of the morning.  But, as always, the crowds are merciless.  It isn’t long before Jake has to trudge to his feet again and start making coffee.

You want to help him. You wish you could take him away from this damn job, because if your human is dying, you don’t want his last precious few hours to be spent working his perfect ass off in this coffee shop.

But as much as you want to help, you can’t fight what you are.  You’re a vampire, and you’re really not supposed to be up during the day.  Despite your deep heavy cloak, the sun still irritates you, and it saps away your strength.

Suddenly, it’s noon.

You sense your little shit brother walk into the store, feeling equally as miserable as you.  When you turn to look at him, you’re not surprised to see John Egbert at his side.  

The kid’s fallen for him.  Hard.

John immediately runs behind the counter and pulls Jake into a hug.  

“Jake!” he exclaims, looking at his cousin with concern in those blue eyes of his that have trapped your brother in their depths.  “Jake, you look terrible…!”

“You really know how to greet a guy,” Jake says wryly.

John only squeezes him tighter, and you swear you hear your human squeak a little.  “You know what I mean!  I came here because I was worried about you.  Please, Jake, let me work for you.  I’m not doing anything today anyway.  I don’t have any New Year’s plans.”

Jake scoffs lightly.  “No plans?  How insulting!”  Jake pauses and laughs lightly, but it’s a weak laugh, one without any energy behind it.  

You’re immediately on the edge of your chair, ready to catch your human if he falls.  

But he doesn’t. Instead, he looks over at John and smiles weakly as he says, “What happened to marathoning all of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s movies tonight?”

“Arnold isn’t going anywhere,” John insists.  “We can watch all his movies when you’re feeling better.”

For some reason, John’s words make Jake pause, as if he’s considering something.  But Jake brushes it off and instead shuffles weakly towards the snack case, snatching a blueberry muffin.  “I probably just need to eat.  It’s been days…”

“Days?!” John exclaims, filled with concern.

They talk a little longer, but you’re suddenly distracted by your brother, who’s come to sit with you in the darkest corner of the store. The beanbag chair shifts as you both settle into it.  

“Dude, it’s been days since Jake’s eaten?”  Dave asks, throwing a questioning glance at you.  “You’re really tryin’ to starve him to death, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m not,” you grumble back quietly, alarmed with your brother’s choice in words.  “He won’t eat anything.  He wouldn’t eat any of Jade’s Christmas dinner, and all the leftovers spoiled.  I tried buying him rare steaks from the best steakhouse in town, but he wouldn’t touch those either.”

Dave sniffs the air as you both watch Jake struggle to slowly consume the muffin while assuring John he’s all right.  Your brother looks back at you accusingly and says, “you _have_ been feedin’ him.  Somethin’ you told me never to feed humans.”

“I had to feed him _something_ ,” you growl back quietly. “He’s obviously sick.”

“Bro, _we_ feed off _humans_ , not the other way around.  Did you forget about that?  Vampires and humans, lesson 101?” Dave growls back.  “I know Hal was a psycho and got off on it, but normal humans shouldn’t want to drink our blood. How do you know Jake isn’t this sick because you’re feedin’ him your fuckin’ blood?!”

“Look, Jake’s _my_ human and _my_ problem, so back off,” you growl even lower, certain that if you weren’t speaking so quietly you would both be attracting a lot of attention by now.  You watch as Jake continues to struggle to eat, and your eyes narrow.

It breaks your heart to see him hurt. Struggling to eat. Dying.  

Jake English is your world.  He has been since he walked into your life. You know without a shadow of a doubt that you love and care for this human more than anything in the universe.  

And now, you have to watch him die.  Not swiftly, at the wrong end of a sword or gun.  

No. You have to watch Jake _slowly_ die.

Every day, Jake struggles harder to get up. Every day he’s weaker. You feel his pain through your bond and it makes you want to weep.

You’re actually not sure when you saw him eat last.  Sometime before Christmas. And he hasn’t had any need for your restroom in days either.

The only thing he seems to need is the one thing no human should ever want.

As Dave just reminded you, vampire blood isn’t something humans should crave. Especially not the way Jake has begged for it. You have felt hesitant about giving Jake your blood for a long time now, but you can’t bring yourself to stop.

You’re certain that your blood is the only thing keeping Jake alive.  

Suddenly, you feel a wave of pain and sickness pulse through your bond.  You look sharply at Jake, and see him doubling over, his hand over his mouth before he makes a mad dash for the bathroom.

Like a shadow, you’re right behind him. John tries to follow you both into the bathroom, but you quickly close the door on him.

Your human is hurt and dying. You are _not_ going to waste any time with his cousin.  You’ll leave that to Dave.

You lock the door behind you and quickly move over to support Jake with your arms as he leans over the toilet, losing all of the blueberry muffin he just ate.  Jake is miserable.  You can sense through your bond that he feels awful, even worse than he felt when he first woke up.

You sense when there’s nothing left in his stomach, and you don’t hesitate to tear a small hole in your neck, pulling your precious human into your lap to drink.

Jake latches on quickly, swallowing mouthful after mouthful of your blood.  You sense it calming him, energizing him, and giving him strength.  It’s wonderful, and you love making your human feel so alive and good.

But. After your thoughts this afternoon, you are suspicious. You sense deeper into Jake’s psyche, past his feelings and emotions and down to his very soul itself.

What you find makes you squeeze him tighter, holding onto him for fear that he might fly away.

With every swallow, you feel Jake dying.

Dave was right.

Your blood _is killing him_.

But, shockingly, when you finally pull Jake away from your neck, he looks much better than before. You sense that he feels better than he’s felt all day, though he’s far from being in top shape. He whines softly as you gently pull him away, but he murmurs a soft “thank you” to you.

Jake cleans the bathroom of his mess and then cleans himself up in the sink. Then he looks at you and actually laughs. “Dirk, you look like you’re watching a ghost!”

“I feel like I am,” you murmur.

“Oh, come here, pet,” he says, pulling you into a gentle embrace. “I’m sorry I scared you.  It was just a little sickness!”

“It was more than that, baby,” you respond quietly.  “My blood’s bad for you.”

Jake pulls away and looks at you, offended as he says, “I beg your pardon, but I think I know what’s good and bad for me.  And your blood is the best for me! Strider, I quite simply feel fantastic right now!”

And yet, despite what he says, you can sense that what’s happening is the opposite.  Jake might sound chipper, but when you feel his soul, you can sense the delicate threads of his life being sheared away, one by one.  Your precious human is dying with every passing hour, and not in the sense that all humans are slowly dying.

Jake might not even have another month of life left.

In a month’s time, you could lose your human.

In a month’s time, you could lose your _mate_.

The thought is so powerful it brings tears to the corners of your eyes.  Because, to a vampire, finding your mate is the world.  

It’s life itself. It’s the defining factor that creates your very existence.

To lose a mate is the opposite. It’s the end of everything, the least of which is your own life. It’s losing all the happiness and joy you ever felt. It’s losing half of yourself, because your mate _is you_.

You aren’t really sure where all this prophetic jargon came from, but when you search inside your soul, you know it’s true. You know all these things about vampires and their mates because you’ve found your mate.

Jake Fucking Human English is your mate.

And he’s dying.

Jake cups your cheek with his palm and pulls you into a kiss.  He looks up at you with concern and stammers softly, “Strider, please don’t give me that look.  I promise I feel better now, and… and when you look like that it…. it makes me think…. you... ”

Jake pauses, his words falling silent as you see tears appear in his eyes that mirror your own.  Here in this tiny coffee shop bathroom, it seems he’s realized the truth.  He’s feeling what you’re feeling, and it’s terrible.

“Oh pet…” he murmurs, burying his face in your jacket as he weeps.  Even though you can’t see his face, you can sense all of the love mixed with anguish flooding through your bond.  You sense it, and you both love and hate it.  “This… this isn’t fair.  You’re a vampire, meant to live forever, and I’m a human.  A human that’s going to die long before you do.”

You can taste the irony of his words in the air, and for once, you hate that irony even exists.  Because it never applied this closely to you before.  It never meant you were going to lose your mate and everything in one fell swoop.

In less than a month’s time, you feel, your mate will leave you.

You’ll be alone until the end of your days, which likely won’t be much longer than that.

Jake looks up at you questioningly, the tears drying in his eyes and confusion and concern replacing them.  He’s trying to understand the depths of your thoughts right now, but you can’t let him.

You can’t let him know he doesn’t have much longer to live, even if Jake already suspects it.

Quickly, you dry the last of the tears off his cheeks and murmur, “we should probably get back outside.  John will be worried about you.”

You lead him back outside, and as predicted, John is fast to fly into Jake’s arms, hugging him and demanding that he’s ok.  You leave the two of them to talk and move back to your beanbag corner.  You grumble when you notice that Dave has taken over the entire place, his scrawny limbs hanging over everything like a spider laying its claim over the corner of the coffee shop.  Dave groans a little in protest, but you still manage to shove his legs aside.  

Quietly, Dave growls at you, “I hope you know what you’re doin, bro.  Because from where I’m standin’, it looks like he’s not gettin’ better.”

“Fuck off,” you murmur back, feeling exhausted from the ordeal in the bathroom and the realizations you had.  Then, you sit back in the beanbag chair and hide your face back in the comfortable depths of your hood, ready to sleep the rest of the day away.

But you don’t have that luxury.  You’ve just closed your eyes when you feel it again.  The searing pain burning through your bond.

John is screaming and Jake is crumpled on the ground behind the counter.

Quickly, you dash to his side and scoop your human up, not liking the pale color of his skin, or the sallow look in his once vibrant green eyes.  Jake whispers to you weakly, “home…. take me home…. please.”

You sense Jake’s soul, and you feel that more of the threads of his life have snapped.  You dip your head in silent mourning and hug him closer to you, “It’s ok, baby.  I’ll take you home.”

John is beside himself, angry and shouting for answers, stirring up quite a ruckus in the store. You don’t miss Dave growling at you, standing by John’s side and hugging him protectively.  But you can’t give them any explanations right now.  You can’t give a shit about them.

The only thing you’re focused on is getting your dying mate home.

You want him to be as comfortable as possible in his last few days.  But more than anything, you want him to know just how deep your love runs for him.

That he’s your universe.  That he’s your everything.

You curse whatever deity decided to make you a vampire and your mate a human.  That you would have this struggle, regardless of whether you bonded.  Regardless of whether you fed him your blood.  Regardless of whether you bit him and bled him to death, as you’ve been so tempted to do for the past few weeks.

As much as you curse it, you can’t change fate.  You can’t change the cards you were given when you were born.  Neither can Jake.

You can only accept them.  Take your mate and love him.  Cherish him more than anything else.

You always worried it would be you that would kill Jake, as you did with Hal.  You worried you would lose control someday and take his life before you knew what was happening.

And yet, you get the feeling you will both meet your fate soon.  Not because you killed Jake, but because with his death, Jake will kill you.

You scorn the terrible irony as you duck through the shadows, bringing your human home.

* * *

 

Unfortunately, you’re still Dirk Strider.  And your luck still sucks.  

Your human is dying in the bed beside you.  Every second that passes, you feel his life-force growing weaker.  The threads of his soul slowly coming unwound and detaching from his life.  His breathing is less steady than before, and even though he’s asleep, there’s a look of pain and torment on his face.

You did this to him.  You know undeniably that something you did made this happen.  Jake was never sick like this before you knew him.  You know that by the shock in Jake’s very demeanor now that he’s sick.  He’s not used to this.  The thought hurts you even more.

You guard over him sleeplessly all day, and when night comes, the familiar jingling of your phone makes you growl with anger.

How dare they ask you to defend the city from demons now?  

How DARE they when they must KNOW your mate is sick and dying!

Still, you are a creature of habit and duty, and you turn away from Jake to glance at your phone.  You read about tonight’s mission and growl.  Dave can handle this one on his own.

But suddenly, Jake is at your back, pawing at you lightly.  “Dirk, what is it?”

You’re taken by surprise. “Baby?” you murmur, turning to him to find him smiling at you softly.

Jake chuckles, “that’s me, pet.”

“How…” you murmur.  Jake looks better somehow.  You sense his lifeforce again, and he’s undeniably still dying, but he’s _smiling_ at you and he looks like he actually has _energy_.  “You… you looked like you were dying.”

Jake frowns at you, “that’s really not a nice thing to say about a guy.  I hope you didn’t learn that from John.  I’ll have to have words with him.  Words, I say!”

Jake seems positively radiant as he springs from the bed, pulling you with him towards the shower.  “In any event, we had better get showered.  I know what that ring means.  That means we have work to do!”

“There’s no _‘we’_ baby.   _I_ have work to do.  Or _Dave_ has work to do.  This isn’t your job.  It isn’t your problem,” you attempt to protest as Jake pushes you insistently into the bathroom.

“Strider, how many times must I tell you that _your_ work is _my_ work?” he asks, his bright green eyes glinting at you as he turns on the water and shoves you in before it’s even warm.

You shiver and gasp, not expecting to be thrown into the frigid spray of water.  You watch Jake as he slowly disrobes himself, dropping his pants and shirt down onto the ground and leaving behind a sleek nude body that you instantly want to ravish.  

You notice that Jake doesn’t step in with you until the water is warm.  Jake still looks paler than you would like, but when his warm body is pressed next to yours, the slick water running between the two of you, you quickly forget that detail.  With Jake here, telling you he’s better, it’s easy to believe he’s truly better.

Jake’s ass is perfect in your hands, and you squeeze him till he makes a small squeak, pulling him closer to you.  You growl, feeling that this human is _yours_.  That you own every part of him, body and soul.  

Jake is _yours_.  

“ _Mine_ ….” you purr as you pull him to you, feeling how much your words have already aroused him.  You’re already fully hard, and you can’t wait for him to join you.  To want this as much as you want it.

You know what will turn him on.  And it’s something you want too.

It’s a win-win.  You want your human badly, and you can’t see anything wrong with it.

Jake gasps softly as you kiss him lovingly, trailing kisses down his jawline and neck.  When you reach the base of his neck by his collarbone, you lick back up, listening to Jake as his breathing hitches, knowing what’s going to come.

Jake doesn’t stop you. Your human wants this just as much as you want it.

Without a second thought, you bite into him, relishing his soft cry as your teeth pierce his skin.  As soon as his hot human blood hits your tongue, you’re done.  You always suspected the truth, but now that you know Jake is your mate, the perfection of his blood makes even more sense to you.

You want it as badly as you want him, and as you drink it, you run your hands along his slick body, feeling as his muscles tense and relax.  You feel him growing harder against you, until both of your arousals are pulsing against the other, begging to be touched.

Somehow, Jake senses this, and he slides his hand between you both, his fingers curling around both your dicks and pumping them together.  A deep growl leaves your throat as you instinctively bite into him deeper and….

Suddenly you pull away.  

“No!” you grunt harshly, licking him and stopping the flowing of his blood. You know why you didn’t want to do this in the first place.

Jake’s sick.  You remember now.

“Why did you let me???” you gasp at him, squeezing your eyes shut as you sense his life force.

It’s weaker.  You’ve managed to kill him even more.

“Dirk!” Jake pleads, his tears blending with the shower water as he holds onto you tighter.  His hand is still around both your arousals.  

He still wants it.  Still wants you to take him.  

He wants you to bite him.

You look at him apologetically and groan softly, shaking your head.  “Can’t… can’t, baby.  You’re sick…. gonna kill you if I take any more.”

But Jake needs you.  You look into his pleading green eyes and know that you’ve lost.  Your teeth are grazing his skin before you even realize what you’re doing and pull back.

You don’t trust yourself with him.  He’s too precious. Too fragile and mortal.

But you also can’t leave him like this either.  Instead, you reach for the soap, slicking up your fingers before pressing them gently inside him.  Jake seems startled, but he quickly melts into your touch.

You actually think you hear him trying to purr as you finger his prostate gently, caressing it and giving him so much pleasure his purring sounds turn into moans of pleasure.  You’re quick to slick your own dick before you lean back against the cold shower tiles, pick up your precious human, and lower him down onto yourself.

Jake’s eyes slide shut, and a deep sultry moan escapes his lips as he sinks slowly down onto you until his perfect ass is flush against your thighs.  You feel him entwine his arms around your neck for support, even though you have him completely balanced and supported with your hands cupping his perfect asscheeks.

“Nnn…. baby… so perfect baby….” you groan, licking his slightly salty skin lovingly.  Jake tastes like bliss, and you smell his blood taunting you beneath his skin.  

You want it… you crave it.  But you won’t take it.  Instead, you start moving him up and down your dick, making both of you groan quietly.  “Don’t… don’t let me bite you again… ok baby?”

“I make… no promises,” Jake pants back, before tipping his head back and letting a long and low moan reverberate between the shower walls.

You take him slowly but deliberately, and though you’re tempted to bite him the entire time, you don’t.  You keep yourself in check and leave the only penetration to his ass.

When Jake comes, it’s a beautiful and perfect miracle, and you pick up the speed a little bit, bringing yourself to release shortly behind him.

Jake curls in on you, leaning over to rest his forehead against yours.  He brings his hands to your cheeks and smiles, laughing softly as he kisses you over and over.  “Thank you…. I love you, pet.  Let’s clean up so we can catch some imps now, ok?”

It isn’t until later, when you’re both finally clean, that the question comes to your mind.

When did you tell him your target was imps?

* * *

 

You’re suddenly John Egbert, and aside from Jake’s illness, the last couple of weeks have been some of the best in your life.  You owe a lot of that to Dave, though you’d never admit it to him.

Once he came around, life became so much more… alive. Everything was vivid, lush with color and feeling.  When you close your eyes, you see him smirking at you from behind those silly dark sunglasses that he always wears.

It’s rare, but he’s taken his glasses off for you since the first time.  Only when you requested it, of course. You found something extremely captivating and alluring in those wine red eyes.  You’re sure that some of it is the ethereal appeal of his vampire nature.  But the rest… you’re not so sure about.

Ok, you’re actually _pretty sure_ about it.  You’re pretty sure that you like Dave as more than just a friend.  And you’re absolutely sure he likes you back more than that too.

Yet, you haven’t made any move to take your friendship with him past where it was.  You still kiss him occasionally, which you guess people who aren’t dating probably wouldn’t do.  And you still beg him to sleep over in your bed with you, which you’re also pretty sure is exclusive to dating people.  Not in the sleep-over sense, really, but in the sense that you feel so comfortable when he curls up behind you, pulling your bodies together.  Dave makes you feel happy.  Makes you feel safe.

But you’re definitely not dating Dave.

Not yet.

Maybe not ever.

But maybe soon, you hope?

You groan loudly both at your thoughts and at the fact that Dave’s managed to beat you in Mario Kart again.  After Jake left looking sicker than ever this afternoon, Dave was extra determined to cheer you up after work.  He took you out to the arcade again, and he watched you stuff your face with pizza after that.  He offered to take you clubbing, but you politely refused, since it’s never really been your scene.

Instead, you asked to see his place.

Dave seemed both shocked and delighted.  He picked you up and ran with you faster than ever, excited to get you back home.  You were so happy to finally see Dave’s home, which wasn’t quite as messy as you had suspected it might be.

Dave’s house actually looks pretty normal on the outside.  The exterior model is identical to those around it.  But inside there is a long staircase that leads into a GIANT second basement, which you suspect must take up the space of at least ten basements, buried beneath all the homes around Dave’s house.  

His house was so huge that you insisted on running through all of the rooms while Dave trailed behind you.  Dave ensured you that all the windows upstairs were vampire-safe, despite their looks.  Dirk created them for both their homes a long time ago.

Speaking of a long time ago, you get the feeling that Dave’s house is ancient and one of a kind.  Though the outside looks as aged as the homes around it, the basement is tricked out with the most high-tech gear you’ve ever seen.

Dave even has a little robot to serve him chilled apple juice. Apparently it was a birthday present from Dirk sometime ago, and Dave doesn’t know what he would do without it. You eye the little robot as it offers you some chilled apple juice in between your rounds, knowing not to disturb you during your game.  You laugh and take a glass, sipping some of the best apple juice you’ve ever tasted.

“I get it pressed fresh from farm grown apples,” Dave says, seeming oddly proud.  You can’t help smiling at how much he prides himself on apple juice.  Dave is a vampire, one of the most powerful beings on this planet, but he’s completely enraptured and obsessive over apple juice.

You wonder if Kanaya is obsessive over anything.  Or Dirk.  You make a mental note to ask Rose and Jake about it later.

As your cousin comes to mind, your thoughts grow somber.  Jake looked terrible today, far worse than you have ever seen him.  But before you can think about it too much, a loud rap song permeates through the air.  It only stops when Dave picks up his phone and groans. “We’ve got company tonight.”

“Company?” you ask, leaning over to look at the phone.

“Imps,” he says, groaning and staring at the phone expectantly.  “Ten bucks says Dirk asks me to handle it.  Again.  Lousy piece of shit brother can’t be bothered to do any work lately.”

And yet, as you both continue to stare at Dave’s phone, the only thing you see are the cartoon characters he drew in the background.  He never gets a call or even a text from Dirk.

“Well color me surprised,” he murmurs, putting his phone away.

You grin and hold out your hand to him.  “More like color you ten bucks down.”

“That wasn’t a serious bet!” Dave exclaims.

“Sure it was, you said so yourself,” you point out, grinning as you lean in closer to him..

“We didn’t shake on it,” he counters, and you swear you see him getting a little flustered.

“Do you want to be a liar?” you ask, so close to him that you can smell the delicious scent of his skin.

You’ve never been able to fully describe Dave’s scent.  It’s exotic and alluring, but it’s also touched with a little of the sweet apple juice he always drinks.

Dave smells wonderful, and the thought distracts you enough to not see the kiss coming.  But when your lips are together, kissing gently yet lovingly, you moan softly.  Your cheeks flush, embarrassed by the sound you made, but Dave doesn’t seem to mind.

Quite the opposite, he pulls you into his lap so he can kiss you deeper.  And you let him.

You’re pretty sure this is something boyfriends do.  Sitting in each other’s laps.  Kissing.  Feeling their arousals touch through their clothes…

You gasp softly, sliding back onto the couch when you realize your dick was touching his.  That you were both aroused for each other.  Again.

“Dave, I’m so confused,” you groan, your voice barely a whisper.

Though Dave doesn’t need to breathe, you hear him exhale a shaky breath, as if to calm himself down.  “Yeah, I know you are.  So, you want me to take you home now?”

You shake your head, because you can’t let things end like this.  “No.  No, I’m coming with you tonight.”

“What? Fuck no,” he says.  “Demons aren’t your business.”

“Well you’re a demon, and I’d say you’re my business!” you protest, looking at him sharply.  No, you’re not leaving him like this after a wonderful night together.  You don’t know what it is you two have together, but it isn’t anger for the other.  You’re certain of that.

Dave sighs and stands up, turning the game system off. “Fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn you if they start causing mischief.”

You grin at him, “Oh, I think they’ll meet their match in mischief making.”

* * *

 

A little bit later, you and Dave are walking down the city streets.  In the distance, you see a flurry of tiny little shapes flying around, hovering by streetlamps and post boxes.  Before you can get very far, Dirk and Jake drop down beside you.  You see Dirk hand Jake money and push him towards the bookstore.

Seeing the exchange between his brother and Jake, Dave finally fishes into his wallet and gives you the ten bucks you won from him fair and square earlier.  “Here, go hang out with your lame cousin.”

“Jake is not lame!” you growl, snatching the money and running after your cousin. You really want to see what Dave and Dirk do for a living, but you’re also worried about Jake.  You follow after him quickly, catching up to him and hugging him tightly. “Jake!!!  I was so worried about you!”

Jake returns the hug, smiling at you gently.  “No need to be worried, John!  I’m fit as a fiddle!”

You pout at him, looking at him closely.  From up close, you can see how pale he is now.  There are dark circles under his eyes that weren’t there before, and there’s an unhealthy look in his eyes that makes you want to cry.  “Jake, you’re not better, stop pretending you are!  I’m so worried about you! Please let me take your shifts at the cafe so you can get better!”

Jake sighs and shakes his head.  “That’s very kind of you to offer, John, but you know I can’t.  Someone has to take care of Gramma…”

“Dad offered to take care of Gramma!  To take care of you!” You cry.  “Why can’t--why can’t you just accept that?”

“It’s not just me, John.  You know Gramma would never accept his money.  She’s too proud,” Jake says softly.  “Dirk offered too… but I told him no.  I have to do this on my own.”

“But _why_?” you persist, really not seeing the reason or logic at all.  “Jake, you’re sick!  I’ll give you the money I make if you let me work for you!  I promise!”

“That’s kind of you, John, but I’m afraid I can’t accept that,” Jake says. “Besides, I feel fine right now!  Let’s have a look around the bookstore on the Striders’ dime, what say you?”

Reluctantly, you agree, perusing the bookstore with Jake.  You find a book about the history of apple juice, and you’re too tempted to not buy it.  Jake, meanwhile, spends his time in the section for the occult arts, perusing the books until he finds one filled with vampire lore.  “One can never arm themselves with enough knowledge about their significant other,” Jake explains when you look at him. He looks at your book selection quizzically.  “What’s that?”

“Inside joke,” you giggle, remembering the note you made for yourself earlier.  “Hey Jake, does Dirk have any weird obsessions?”

Jake pays for his book and pauses to think.  “You know…he does seem oddly fixated on his hair.”

After you pay, you both stand around waiting for a moment before Jake decides it’s time to leave.  You pause, holding onto his sleeve and giving him a worried look.  “Are you sure it’s ok to go out there?  I mean, Dirk and Dave seemed like they really wanted us to stay inside.”

Jake brushes it off and opens the door, pulling you both into the nighttime air.  “There’s nothing in this night that I can’t handle.  I’m sure of it!” Jake says confidently, though you’re not really sure you believe him.  He turns to you, giving you a charming smile and adds, “besides, how much trouble can an imp really be?  I’d say I’ve already survived the biggest mischief maker right here!”

You giggle as Jake pokes your chest.  It calms you down enough to follow him through the streets.  The strange swarming shapes aren’t around anymore.  It seems like Dirk and Dave have already done a lot of the work.

Jake pauses as he hears a strange rustling from the alley beside you.  When you catch his eyes, you shake your head, your own eyes growing wide.  But Jake doesn’t listen to you, of course. He walks into the alleyway, his eyes immediately focusing on a small dark shape flying around.  “I thought I heard you,” he says softly, following it down to the end of the alleyway.  The alleyway dead ends at a couple locked doors, brick walls rising high into the sky, leaving nowhere to go.

You hesitantly follow Jake, not liking the looks of this alleyway at all. Your dad always taught you to be careful and not to go into strange places like this.  

But Jake is heedless of any danger, and he follows the little creature to the end of the alleyway.  Somehow, you know that this is one of the imps that Dirk and Dave were sent to remove.  It buzzes in a flurry of motion, smacking against first one brick wall and then another.

“Don’t do that, you’ll hurt yourself!” Jake cries, holding his hands out.  Very slowly and gently, he cups his hands around the imp, cradling it in the palms of his hands.  A very high pitched squeaking sound fills the air as the imp chatters fearfully, buzzing and trying to get away. “Now now, there’s no need for that kind of attitude. Nobody’s going to hurt you.”

Very slowly, Jake uncups his hands, using his thumbs to gently stroke the tiny black ball of fluff.  Again, the imp makes squeaking sounds, but this time, they’re not the high pitched sounds of alarm from before.  This time, they’re happier and calmer sounds.

“Should you really be touching that imp?” you ask.

“Yes, John.  It’s perfectly fine!”  Jake says, turning around so that you can see the little imp better.  “Can’t you see he’s just scared? Poor little fellow.”

You’re still not completely sold, but Jake’s never been one to take the reasonable approach to anything.

“You just need a little love and affection, don’t you?” Jake practically croons at the imp.  Then he brightens, having clearly thought of a brilliant Jake idea.  “I know what you need!  You need a name!”

“Jake, it’s not a pet!  It’s an imp!  The things Dave and Dirk are supposed to get rid of!” You attempt to reason with Jake again.

“Charlie.  I’ll call you Charlie,” Jake decides, heedless of your words.  He smiles at the little imp, petting it until it makes a soft little buzzing sound.  “How is that?  Do you like your new name, Charlie?”

The little imp “Charlie” squeaks happily, buzzing up to sit on Jake’s shoulder.  Jake laughs.  “I’ll take that as a yes!”

Moments after you walk back into the main street, Dave and Dirk run up to your side.  “There’s only one more,” Dave murmurs, looking at Jake.

“No!” Jake exclaims, immediately scooping the little imp back up into his hands.  The little imp squeaks in terror, recoiling into Jake’s hands in fear.  Jake immediately cradles the imp protectively, petting him with his thumbs again.  “You can’t kill him!”

“Kill him?” Dirk scoffs.  “We’ve been sending them back to Derse.  You know, where they belong.  They don’t die.  Besides, there’s a million more imps there if you really want one.”

“I don’t want just any imp, I want Charlie!  And you can’t kill him or send him back to Derse or do whatever it is you were planning to do with him because I said so and I won’t let you!” Jake exclaims all in one incredibly long breath.

For a moment, nobody says a thing.

And then the silence is broken as Dave laughs loudly.  “Oh man, this is rich.  Well, he’s _your_ problem,” he says.

Dave’s chuckling doesn’t stop, even when Dirk punches him in the shoulder.

* * *

 

You’re suddenly Dirk, and you’re faced with a terrible dilemma.

“No,” you growl, standing on the front step to your house.

“Yes!” Jake demands, his eyes flashing brightly at you as he cradles his imp.

You marvel at Jake’s flashy eyes. So beautiful. So captivating.  So flashy. But you won’t be tempted by him.  Even if he _is_ your mate.

“No!” you growl louder.  “Imps do _not_ belong in the house!  That thing has no place here!”

“This isn’t just some _thing_!  He has a name, and his name is Charlie!” Jake protests, holding onto his precious fuzzy imp and vowing silently to keep him safe forever.

“Imps are the dirt of Derse.  They’re _pests_ and they’re everywhere,” you growl, crossing your arms.  “I won’t have garbage like that in my house. I forbid it!”

Jake glares at you, his eyes extra flashy, and you can see the anger and fury behind his expression. You expect him to shout his rage back at you, but instead his gaze hardens, “well _fine_ then.  If you won’t let Charlie into your home, then I’ll just have to take him back to Gramma’s with me.  I know she would never turn away a poor sweet imp like Charlie!”

Red text flashes across your screen, and Hal accosts you with words. Oh fuck no. Dirk, fix this. I demand you fix this, because I’m not losing him.

“ ** _You’re_** _not losing him?_ ” you think back to Hal, feeling a small possessive twinge inside you.

You’ll lose him too. Hal responds. Look at him. He’s serious about moving back to his grandma’s house if you don’t let his imp live here.

“ _Imps are **dirty**.  They’re the filth of Derse! I can’t let it live here!_ ” You think back angrily.

Fuck, Dirk. It’s like a spider. A fucking spider. You’re going to lose Jake over a spider? Hal growls. He’s your _mate_ , Dirk. You have to take care of him. Even if you don’t like the things you have to do.

Hal’s right, as much as you hate to admit it.  You growl out your rage and rip a bush up from your front lawn, throwing it down the street two blocks.  Then you open the door and storm downstairs, straight into your shower.

You feel Jake’s pleased vibes wash over you through your bond, and you know without even seeing it that he’s making a little cardboard box bed for the stupid imp.  A couple minutes later, Jake slips into the shower with you, and you feel his warm soft human skin on your back, his arms circling around to hug you from behind.  

“Thank you,” he murmurs softly, squeezing you lightly.

“You’re welcome,” you respond, defeated.

You sigh the deepest and longest of sighs, knowing that you’ll never get rid of that imp.

* * *

 

A few hours later, you are John Egbert.  After “fighting” imps, you head back home with Dave to chill and play some video games.  But it isn’t long before your phone lights with a new text message.  When you read it, your face brightens with happiness.

“What’s got your panties in a bundle, Egderp?” Dave asks, not even looking up from the game.  He’s completely owning you at Halo now that you’re not paying attention.

“It’s Jake!  He said he feels well enough to watch at least one movie before midnight.  I completely forgot it was New Year’s Eve!” You exclaim, texting him back quickly.  “He said Dirk’s cranky tonight so we’ll go to my dad’s.”

“Or they could come here,” Dave offers, catching you by surprise.  When he notices you staring, he glances over a couple times and says, “what?  Dirk’s always a cranky ass, but he’ll come over here. Besides, you can be as loud as you want here.”

Slowly, you smile at him, hurrying to text Jake back.  “All right. Do you have any Arnold Schwarzenegger movies?”

“You mean like the new Terminator?” He asks. “It’s not out on DVD yet, but I could download it.”

“I didn’t ask you do anything illegal!” you laugh, pushing him over. “Even old-school Terminator is fine.  Or Predator.  Even Twins.  Jake and I don’t care.”

Dave makes a show of groaning like it’s the hugest pain in the ass as he slowly gets up to peruse his collection of movies.

About half an hour later, Jake and Dirk show up to Dave’s place.  With one little fuzzy addition.

Charlie the imp squeaks and immediately jumps off Jake’s shoulder, buzzing happily around Dave’s house.

“Hey, tell your imp it better not break anything!” Dave growls, shaking his fist at the imp as it chirps happily and flies upstairs.  Seconds later, you hear a crashing sound come from the living room.  With a deep sigh, Dave ascends the stairs to check it out.

Dirk looks predictably unhappy, glowering as he pushes his way inside and sits on Dave’s couch.  You ignore the frightening vampire as usual, which is easy to do when Jake giggles and pulls you into a hug.  “John, I’m so glad we could keep up our tradition!”

“Yeah, me too!” you agree, hugging him warmly and leading him over to Dave’s couch.  You check the clock and hastily start up Terminator 2.  “We should have just enough time to watch this before the countdown.  But Dave…”

“Right here,” Dave grumbles, flopping down next to you on the couch.   He reaches over for the remote and starts the movie.  “Your fuckin’ imp broke a couple lamps upstairs.  Not that I need ‘em, but it’s a mess.”

Jake simpers at Charlie as the imp buzzes back over to his shoulder and pets him apologetically with a tiny fuzzy hand. “Oh, Charlie’s sorry!  He was only trying to explore!”

“Whatever,” Dave grumbles, lounging back and closing his eyes.  “Let me know when it’s time for the countdown.”

You smile as you watch the movie, sitting between your favorite two people in the world.  Jake is on your left and Dave is on your right.  You can feel the warmth from their bodies, pressed up against yours, and you feel nothing but happiness and love the whole time you watch the movie.  Dave and Dirk are like the bookends, on either side of you and Jake.  Dirk is frighteningly silent the whole time, and you think once or twice you catch him glowering at Charlie. 

Dave pretends to sleep, but you catch him reaching for your hand.  When you take his and squeeze, you swear you see him smile.

When the movie is over, you have just enough time to flip to the countdown on TV.  You and Jake scream at the top of your lungs, as is customary for you both. 

“10! 9! 8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!” you both scream in unison.

As is also customary, you and Jake pull each other into a bone crushing hug, which you swear feels a little _more_ bone crushing than usual this year.  You don’t care, though. You’re just so happy to be able to spend New Year’s Eve with Jake again!!!

A few seconds later, you pull back, looking at each other and laughing.  You fall back into Dave’s waiting arms, letting him pull you into a gentle kiss.  When you glance over, you notice Dirk and Jake also kissing while Charlie buzzes around the room excitedly.

“This year’s gonna be a good one,” Dave murmurs to you, beneath the noise of the TV.  “I can feel it.”

“How do you know?” you as him.  You think you know what he’s going to say.

Predictably, but no less adorably, he says exactly what you expect.  “Cause you’re here.”

You feel your cheeks flush as you look up at him.  You push up his glasses so you can look into his wine red eyes, and you feel nothing but happiness.  Pure unadulterated happiness.

Without thought, you lean up to kiss him again.  This time, your kiss lasts much longer.

You’re interrupted by Jake’s characteristic whistling.  “Get a room!” he laughs, nudging you playfully.

“This _is_ my room,” Dave grumbles. “Y’all are crashin’ my party.”

“It wouldn’t be a party without us!” Jake declares, leaning over to hug you both.  Then he glances at the clock and groans.  “Ugh, I have to open again tomorrow.  That’s in four hours. I’d better get going.”

You frown at him and ask, “Jake, are you sure you’re all right?  I can work for you so you can sleep and get better.”

“Look at me, John.  I’m fine!” Jake assures you as he gathers his things, including his silent boyfriend, and heads for the door.  Charlie squeaks and dives under Jake’s shirt when he opens up the door to the chilly nighttime air outside.  “Just come in for your regular shift.  I’ll see you tomorrow! Don’t worry!”

“All right,” you tell him reluctantly, hugging him again before he goes, careful not to squish the imp beneath his shirt.

You spend a little longer at Dave’s place before he offers to take you home.  When you get there, you adjust the curtains so that sunlight won’t come in and hurt him in the morning.  Then you pull him into the bed with you.

As you cuddle together, you feel safer and warmer than ever. You know Dave is right.

This is going to be a good year.

The smile never leaves your face as you drift off to sleep.

* * *

 

You’re again John Egbert, and something is telling you that you should come to the cafe early today.  Your shift doesn’t start until noon, and Jake assured you that he felt fine last night.  But somehow you don’t completely buy that.  You’ve known Jake a long time, and you know when he’s not telling you the complete truth.

When you walk into the store, you gasp when you find Jake leaning against the counter, struggling to wipe the surfaces after the morning rush. “Jake!!” You run behind the counter and quickly support him. Like a ragdoll, Jake falls against you, and you grunt as you struggle to help him walk to the corner.

Before you can take two steps, Dirk’s already at your side, collecting Jake in his strong arms and helping him into the corner with him.  You slide into the beanbag chair beside them, and look at your cousin with concern.  “Jake, you look terrible!”

He laughs at you weakly and softly says, “still… ever the charmer… I see.”

You glare at Dirk and say accusingly, “what happened to him?!  He was fine last night!  Did you hurt him?!”

Dirk shakes his head from within his day cloak.  “I didn’t.  He woke up this morning like this.”

“Jake, why didn’t you call me?!” you demand, hugging him and feeling on the verge of tears.  Jake looks so sick…. so pale. “I would have come in for you!”

“I had… responsibility,” Jake protests.

“Well your responsibility is getting better now!” you say, squeezing his hand and standing up.  “I’ll take care of things from here.  You get some sleep and don’t even think of helping me work!”

You can tell Jake wants to argue, but he doesn’t move from Dirk’s lap.  You work through the rest of the morning crowd and into the afternoon.  Occasionally, you glance over at your cousin, frowning when you see that he’s still in the same position sprawled on top of Dirk.  The two of them are sleeping in the dark corner together, and you might think it was a little cute if you didn’t know how sick Jake was.

Sometime in the late afternoon, the door jingles and you smile as Dave enters the shop.  You’re used to him breezing past the people and coming behind the counter with you, and you pull him into your arms easily, kissing him quickly before too many people can see.  “It’s so early, why are you here?”

Dave yawns underneath his day cloak and to your surprise, he _licks_ you.  Just once, on the cheek.  You think if anyone else would have done that, you’d be grossed out.  But when Dave does it, it seems somehow affectionate.  “Were callin’ me,” he mumbles sleepily, leaning on you in a way that you _know_ he’s playing up his daytime sleepiness.

Calling him?  You don’t remember calling him.  You thought about texting him a couple of times, but you knew he’d be asleep so you didn’t.  “I didn’t call you,” you tell him, showing him the call log on your phone.

Dave snorts and shakes his head.  “Not that kind of a call.  One that’s a lot harder to sleep through.”

“Well, call or no call, if you’re here, you can make yourself useful.  Would you mind terribly cleaning out the coffee grinder?  It’s getting plugged lately,” you say, ushering him in the right direction.

You actually don’t think the coffee grinder needs to be cleaned.  You just want to see him work.  As you watch Dave sleepily clean the machine, a smile touches your face.  You’d be happy watching him do anything.

You’re starting to think that there might not be any helping it.  You just might be hopelessly smitten for him, like it or not.

Your fingers fist into your apron as you think about the consequences, though.  Your dad will be disappointed with you.  You’re sure of it, because if you’re with Dave, you’ll never have kids.  Not only that, you’ll never have a normal life in any sense with a vampire boyfriend.  You don’t even want to think about the sorts of dangers that a vampire might attract.

Disappointment.  You chew on your lower lip to stop it from quivering.  

Your mom never had a chance to see you as anything but a child.  You never accomplished anything before she passed away.  And if you walk down this path with Dave… somehow you know you won’t complete the path you’ve chosen ahead.  

Finishing college.  Getting a PhD.  Settling down in a nice suburb home and having a few kids.

All of that will change if you stay with Dave.

You can’t help laughing softly when a piece falls off the machine and Dave swears at it under his breath.  Everything about him makes you smile.

When you’re with him, you’re happy.

Isn’t that the goal, really?  Isn’t that what all of it’s about?  Happiness?

You think it is.  And you think that even though you may be a disappointment, that you have to at least try pursuing this….whatever it is… that you have with Dave.

It’s a terrifying thought.  You’re still not sure you’re ready for it.  But as he turns around and you face him again, you couldn’t be more sure of it.  You pull him into a deep kiss, right behind the counter of the coffee shop.

Dave makes a small surprised sound, but he quickly returns the kiss, never one to miss an opportunity.  When you pull away, you smile at him and say, “I think there’s something we should talk about after I finish work today.”

“When’s that?” he asks, sounding a little eager.  You wonder if he can guess what you’re thinking.  “In a couple hours?”

After a quick glance at the clock, you groan, “longer.  I came in early today for Jake.  I’m actually closing tonight.”

“Then it looks like we’ll both be here for a while,” Dave says, hugging you once more before looking longingly at the dark corner.  “But I’ll be over there till the sun goes down, if you don’t mind.”

You smile at him, kissing him one more time before pushing him toward the corner.  You laugh softly under your breath as you hear Dave say, “hey, asshole, move over” and shove Dirk aside so he can cozy into the beanbags and fall asleep.

It’s a long and boring day with all your favorite entertaining people asleep in the corner.  But you make it.  When night falls, you’re surprised to find that Jake is the first to wake up.

It’s a slow time in the evening, and there aren’t any customers in the store. You’re cleaning the floors when Jake comes over to you, still looking very sick, and pulls you aside to one of the tables away from the Striders.

“Jake, you should be sleeping,” you tell him, looking at him with concern.

“Do I really look so awful?” he asks, slumping tiredly into his chair.

“Yeah, you do,” you respond, leaning in a little closer so you can look at him better.  

“There’s… something I need to tell you,” Jake says quietly, glancing at the corner to make sure the Striders are still asleep before he looks back at you.  “Dirk and I have bonded.”

“Bonded?” you ask, arching an eyebrow in question, though you think you have an idea of what Jake’s talking about.  

Jade was your grandma too.  She taught you about demons and their ways, and though you might not know quite as much as Jake, you know that bonding is serious business.

“It’s pretty serious business,” Jake says, affirming your thoughts.  “A-anyway.  After we bonded, I started…. _feeling_ … what Dirk feels.  It’s wonderful, John, one of the best things ever.  I-I love being bonded to Dirk.  More than anything, I think.”

You don’t mind listening to Jake gush about Dirk.  Jake’s done so much and he deserves to be happy.  But you get the feeling there’s a reason he’s telling you this.  And you’re not thrilled about where his story is going.

“Lately, I’ve been able to do a little more than sense his feelings,” Jake admits.  “Sometimes I can actually _hear_ what he’s thinking.  It’s not very often, and when it happens, it’s no more than a couple words.  But it happened the other day.  I heard Dirk’s thoughts.”

“....and?” you press, when Jake pauses for a very long time.

Jake looks at you seriously, taking your hands in his as he says, “John, I trust you more than any other on this planet. If…. if something were to happen to me… please promise me you’ll take care of Gramma.”

You’re stunned.  Your mouth drops open slowly as you sit and stare at him.  

Your eyes fill with tears as you realize what he means.  You’re not sure where you were expecting his story to go, but you didn’t want it to go there.

“Jake… you can’t die!” you say, your voice trembling as you speak.  “You can’t!”

“Look at me, John,” Jake says softly.  “You said it yourself, I look terrible.  When have you ever seen me look like this?  Every day I feel worse and worse.”

“You’ve never looked like this,” you say, your voice growing coarser, heavy with anger as you glare over at Dirk.  “Not until you bonded with _him!_   _Dirk’s_ doing this to you, isn’t he?!”

“Dirk would never hurt me!” Jake insists.

But you know better.  It isn’t hard to figure out the truth.  

“Bonding with him is _killing you, Jake!!!_ ”  you roar, slamming your hands against the table and standing up.  “Undo it!  Undo the bond and stay alive!!!”

Jake shakes his head sadly, “it can’t be undone.  Gramma even said so.  I wouldn’t want to undo it even if I could.”

“You _want_ to die?!” you exclaim incredulously.  

“No, but--” Jake pauses when he sees you walking towards the sleeping vampires.  “John, what are you doing?”

Your whole body is aflame with anger as you walk deliberately over to the dark corner of the store.  

You pick up Dirk by his stupid hooded cloak and punch him in the face.

It hurts way more than you expected it to, and the tears that were in your eyes immediately fall.

“This is _your fault!!!_ ” you scream at him, punching him again. “You’re killing him!!! YOU’RE THE ONE KILLING JAKE!!!!”

Both the vampires wake up, and though you know they’re way stronger than you, Dirk doesn’t even try to fight you.  There’s blood on his face, but you get the feeling that’s more from your knuckles than from him.

But Dave changes that with one swift punch.  You hear a cracking sound as Dave’s fist connects with his brother’s face.   _Now_ Dirk is actually bleeding, though he still isn’t fighting back.  

“Is _that_ what’s goin on?” Dave growls at him, anger in his voice.  “You’re killin’ him with your bond?!”

Dave hits him again. And again.  He reels back to strike him again, but Jake jumps in the way, blubbering and holding Dirk protectively.

“Please stop!!” Jake cries.  “Don’t do this to him! Dirk didn’t try to hurt anybody! This isn’t his fault!”

“It _is_ his fuckin’ fault. He knew better,” Dave growls, collecting you and pulling you into his arms.  He walks towards the door and pushes a customer aside as he tries to walk in. “Shop’s closing early tonight.”

Once you’re outside, Dave runs, carrying you back to his home.  He sets you on the couch and looks at your hand.  

“You ok?” Dave asks, his voice quiet as he examines your hand closely.  When he sees how bloody your knuckles are, he only hesitates a second before bringing it to his mouth and licking it clean.

You flinch, because you _know_ Dave wants your blood.  He’s a vampire and he probably wants to take your blood and soul just as much as Dirk wants Jake’s.  

You remember Gramma’s stories.  Demons collect human souls. They crave them.  

Dirk is stealing Jake’s soul and killing him.  And Dave must want yours.  

The thought makes you flinch again.

Dave doesn’t miss it.  You see his eyebrows furrow as he quietly explains, “Chill, dude. It’ll heal faster if I lick it. I’m not takin’ any more of your blood.”

You look back at your hand and are surprised to see that the wounds on your knuckles are healing quickly, closing right in front of your eyes.  It even feels better.  “Thanks,” you murmur quietly.

Both of you sit in awkward silence on the couch for a few moments.  There’s no denying the strangeness of what just happened, both in the coffee shop and here at home.  It’s left an unusual tension in the air that makes you feel very uncomfortable.  You feel like you want to crawl out of your skin, and what you thought was going to be a ground-breaking evening with Dave is quickly turning into one that you’d rather be over as fast as possible.

Dave, as usual, senses your apprehension. “Look, I know you wanted to talk tonight, but if you wanna wait we can talk later.”

“Yeah,” you agree.  “Yeah, I think that would be better for both of us.”

It’s Dave’s turn to flinch a little, and you see how hurt he is by that.  He knows what you were going to tell him, somehow.

Dave knows you were going to ask him to be your boyfriend.  

And he knows that he missed out on it, leaving you both in this strange quagmire of uncertainty that is slowly squeezing and drowning both of you.  You can’t stay in this strange half-way zone forever.  

Half-way between kissing and loving. Half-way between the world of humans and demons.

Your Gramma lived in that world her whole life, and she always cautioned you and Jake to be careful of demons.  She didn’t want you to live through the same pain she did.  You’re finally starting to understand the trials and tribulations that she must have gone through.

You don’t notice Dave reaching for your hand until he touches you.  When he does, you’re suddenly aware of how the temperature of his body is always just a little colder than yours.  Of how he has to force himself to be extra gentle with you, handling you like a fragile porcelain vase that could crack at any moment. It makes you wince and flinch again.

“Hey, you know, we don’t have to hang out if you don’t wanna,” Dave murmurs, clearly hurt again by your instinctive flinching.  “You don’t have to stay here.”

“I know, but I want to,” you tell him carefully.  Dave is still your friend, demon or no.  You still love being with him.  You still feel magnetically drawn to him.

Somehow, despite the danger, you know that Dave Strider is still your destiny.  That whatever is happening to Jake will be your fate someday.

The thought frightens and confuses you, and for the rest of the evening, you don’t really speak much to Dave.  You definitely don’t broach any of the topics you’re thinking about.  

When it comes time for bed, you flinch again at his touch.  The same touch that always made you feel so comfortable.  The touch you craved enough to beg him to spend the night at your place on several occasions.

Dave makes a small sound as he moves away from you, like he wants to say something.  But he doesn’t.

You fall asleep, facing away from him, clinging to the sheets at the furthest edge of the bed.  

The next morning, you wake up in your own bed, back at your dad’s house.

You’re alone.

Dave’s left you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some [beats](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Na1A6lSHns) for your listening pleasure.  
> Additional [ beats](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QqY-8mohxo) ;D


	12. Humans and Demons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Wake up and look me in the eyes again  
> I need to feel your hand upon my face  
> Words can be like knives  
> They can cut you open  
> And then the silence surrounds you  
> And haunts you" --["Bloodstream"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3b1CDLsiGU&list=RDny0I5khCwgg&index=2) by Stateless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sachi, here! I've been more focused on updating lately! I'm sorry for gaps between my chapters lately, I've been suffering from writer's block and the impending doom of the universe. Life is lighter again for now, so here's an update! I hope you enjoy! <3

There's blood all over the paper towels in your hand, and you're starting to panic just a little bit. You're Jake English, and you're currently mopping up your precious mate's face in the bathroom of the coffee shop.

“Why aren't you healing faster?” you ask, tossing the paper towels in the trashcan and getting fresh ones, wetting them before you start cleaning Dirk's lips again. He doesn't answer you, and on top of everything else you're feeling, you're starting to get a little ticked off. “Dirk! I'm talking to you!”

“...'Cause you're so sick...we're bonded so I'm weaker than normal too. Plus I've been out in the sun for so many days...” Dirk mumbles, not bothering to help your efforts of cleaning him. He's reminding you very much of a rag doll, just letting you dictate his movements.

“That's no excuse for letting them beat you up! You can take David on your worst days!” You get rid of these bloodied napkins as well, starting to fret because he's _still_ bleeding. For some reason, all you can think is what a waste this is of his blood.

“I deserved it...” Dirk says softly, and you don't miss the tears in his eyes that have nothing to do with pain caused from his injuries. “I don't know how but...I hurt you... You're so sick, baby...”

You sigh, both at him and the blood running from his nose and lip. Finally you just give into temptation and lean in, licking his face, emitting a soft sigh as you latch to his lip and suck more blood into your mouth. Somehow, you feel his wound healing underneath your tongue.

But there's no time to question that now.

As soon as his lip is healed, you stuff a wet napkin into his bleeding nose, and you look at him sternly.

“Now you listen here, Dirk Strider!” You put your hands on your hips. “Regardless of what's been going on, I can't have you acting like this! If you won't protect yourself, how am I supposed to feel about you going out to fight the demons of Derse?! They'll rough you up much worse than this! You _have_ to take care of yourself. If not for you, then for _me_. It hurts me to see you this way.”

Dirk nods stiffly, and you know he'll listen to you, whether he likes it or not. Ever since the two of you bonded, if you actually _demand_ him to do something, he seems compelled to do it. Lucky for Dirk, you aren't a very demanding person, but him taking care of himself isn't up for debate.

You lean in and kiss him sweetly, taking time to caress his face and kiss the tears away from his eyes.

“Please don't worry so much for me. It's been rough for us both, but I feel better now. You can feel that through our bond, can't you?”

Dirk looks up at you. “Yeah. But it never lasts.”

You grumble and march him out of the bathroom.

Since the doors are locked, you're left with closing work. John's little tantrum has upset you royally, and you're determined to make both John and Dave pay for what they did. As you wipe down, you think of your illness. You aren't stupid. You know bonding with Dirk is what caused this. It's undoubtedly because he's so different from you, and your puny human body can't handle being tethered to his stronger, demonic one. But there's nothing you can do about it now, and like you told John, you wouldn't want to end the bond even if you could.

You love feeling Dirk like this, sensing his thoughts, his feelings. You love always knowing where he is, only having to follow your bond to find him. You love knowing Dirk is _yours_ in every possible way, and that you're his. Even if you're going to die...you're happy. You only want to be with your mate, for however long that might be.

He looks up at you from his spot on the counter, his eyes wide behind his shades.

“Don't think that...” he says weakly, and you smile at him.

“So you _can_ hear my thoughts.”

“Only bits and pieces,” Dirk says, hopping down and hurrying to you. “You...you can't leave me. You can't, Jake, because I don't know what I'll do without you...”

You pull him into your arms, making him bend awkwardly so he can rest his head on your shoulder. Lovingly, you pet him, barely able to hold him up as he rests his whole weight on you.

“I don't regret it, pet,” you say gently. “I'll never regret giving you my soul. It was yours from the beginning.”

“I don't want it...not like this...”

“I'm sorry. No refunds. It's a special Jake rule.”

Dirk doesn't laugh at your joke. In fact, he collapses into you with a sob, and it breaks your heart.

You finally manage to lead Dirk outside to the car, and you decide to drive while he gathers himself, still wrapped around you at an impossible angle. You decide the only thing you can do is pretend everything is fine, because Dirk doesn't seem capable of handling more bad news.

“I'm going to swing by the house and grab Charlie. I need to take him to the store and try to figure out what he likes to eat.”

Dirk doesn't respond. You thought for sure he'd have something snarky to say about Charlie. You know he doesn't like your imp.

You park outside the house and hurry inside, moving downstairs to the cardboard box you fixed up for the sweet little ball of fuzz. Charlie squeaks and lifts his head to look at you as you enter, and he buzzes excitedly, flying to you and tangling in your hair. You reach up and pet him affectionately, loving him already. You don't see how anyone could want to hurt these precious creatures. Charlie is full of nothing but love.

“Be on your best behavior, Charlie!” you say as you move back to the car. “We're going to the store and you might cause a fuss if you're seen.”

Once you're back in the car, Dirk lifts his head, narrowing his eyes at the imp.

“Why are you torturing me?” he asks, and you scoff at him.

“You're being dramatic,” you tell him. “Charlie is mine now, aren't you Charlie?” The imp chirps at you, squirming around in your hair. He's so cute! “See? He's just an adorable pet!”

Dirk _growls_ at you, his eyes flashing, and it takes you a moment to understand why he's so mad.

“He's an _actual_ pet! I'm not giving him your favorite nickname!” you defend.

Dirk crosses his arms but looks more pleased than he has all day. You laugh at him, wondering how in the world Dirk can be so ridiculous.

“He's still a pest,” Dirk informs you while you pull into the grocery store parking lot. “They're like rats in Derse.”

“Rats are adorable,” you tell him, and he looks at you incredulously.

The cold night air feels so... _great_. You've never been one for winter, but this is incredible. It's as though as soon as the sun went down, you started feeling better...

You shake off the thought. Of course having part of Dirk's soul would change you a little bit. You still aren't changed enough, and that's all that matters.

Inside the store you walk through aisle after aisle trying to figure out what Charlie might like to eat, but he never seems interested in anything.

“What do they eat in Derse?” you ask Dirk, who's trailing behind you, looking sullen.

“I don't know. I've never actually bothered to care.”

You make a strangling gesture at him and stomp ahead, very agitated by him.

“Come on, Charlie...” you croon at the imp, scooping him out of your hair so you can look at him. He blinks up at you with his bright red eyes that shine against the blackness of his fuzzy face. “You've got to help me here...” You pet him until he closes his eyes, his little transparent wings buzzing in your palm as he nuzzles against your fingers. He flies a little bit out of your hands, and you think maybe he's about to help you.

But then he knocks a bunch of cans on the floor, making a mess.

“Charlie!” You hurry after him, trying to catch him, but he seems to think you're playing with him. He stays just out of your reach, chirping happily as he throws cans into other aisles. You hear footsteps running towards you, and it's only a matter of time before Charlie is seen! Frantically you swipe at him, but your hands aren't the ones that close around him. Dirk grabs him easily and stuffs him into your shirt collar, grabbing you and hurrying all the way across the store before you can be caught.

“Thank you, pet! Charlie got a little carried away,” you say, petting Charlie with a single finger.

“ _Carried away_ ,” Dirk repeats, but doesn't elaborate.

Charlie is trying to escape your shirt again, but you hold him tight, looking around to see what he could possibly find so interesting. His red eyes are fixated on some plums a few steps away from you, and his little impy hands are outstretched, trying to reach them.

“Fruit?” you ask, hopping out of Dirk's arms and leading Charlie to the plums. He squeaks and tries to bite into one, and you swipe it away from him. “No sir, Charlie! We have to wash these first! Let me bag them for you.”

You get plums, bananas, apples, and peaches, and you hurry to pay for them, slapping Dirk's hand away when he reaches for his card.

“You've made it very clear you want no part in Charlie's care!” you say, paying with cash while the cashier stares at you. “I'll take care of this.”

“I thought you were saving money,” Dirk mumbles.

“I am. But some fruit never made anyone go bankrupt.”

Dirk's sullen attitude persists even as you get home and wash a plum off for Charlie in the sink, handing it to the little imp. Charlie devours it ravenously, and you can't resist giving him another, watching him fondly while he munches away and squeaks affectionately at you, obviously trying to show his appreciation to you.

“I hope you love me as much when I give you a bath, Charlie,” you tell him softly, rubbing his head with your finger. “We've got to make you nice and clean!”

“You aren't using my bathroom for the imp,” Dirk says from behind you, and you roll your eyes at him.

“His _name_ is Charlie! And I'll just use the guest bathroom, then!”

You wait until Charlie is done eating, and then you scoop him up, carrying him upstairs. Charlie seems excited by the bathroom, and you let him play with a bar of soap while you run some water. He finally flies right into the water, chirping happily as he continues playing. You let him splash around since he's obviously enjoying himself. You wonder what life must have been like in Derse for Charlie. He's such a little creature, and he seems afraid of everyone except you. He flinches whenever Dirk is around, and based on what Dirk has said about imps, you can't blame Charlie for being frightened. It seems as though imps are killed an awful lot in Derse, sometimes just for kicks.

Dirk wanders in around the time Charlie takes a big bite out of the bar of soap, and you both look up at Dirk with wide, innocent eyes. Dirk frowns at the imp, but he moves behind you, wrapping his arms around you and kissing your neck.

“Are you finished pouting?” you ask him, sighing softly as his tongue trails on your skin.

“No,” he says, but it's soft.

You set to work on washing Charlie with shampoo, careful to avoid his big eyes.

“Well, you should be. Charlie isn't hurting you. He's just a sweet little imp.”

Dirk grumbles and watches you bathe Charlie, who seems a little reserved now that Dirk is watching him.

“See? You make him scared!” You coo at Charlie and pet him till he buzzes. “He was having fun until you came in here and towered over him!” You lean closer to the little imp. “Dirk isn't scary. He just thinks he is. You don't have to be afraid of him.”

“Yes he does,” Dirk huffs.

You wash the suds off Charlie and then scoop him out of the water, drying him off with a towel. His black fuzz seems to expand now that he's clean, but his eyes stay trained on Dirk. You hold Charlie up to Dirk's face.

“Look how cute he is! Charlie doesn't deserve this foul treatment, Dirk!” Charlie squeaks up at Dirk with wide, impy eyes. “Besides,” you continue, “Charlie's full name is Charlie English-Strider.”

“English-Strider,” Dirk repeats softly, his eyes settling on the little ball of fluff resting in your hands.

“Yes, because our names sound good together,” you say, using your trump card, knowing Dirk will never warm up to Charlie otherwise. “Don't you think so, pet?” You lean in to kiss Dirk sweetly, and he sighs against your lips, knowing he's defeated.

“Yeah...” Dirk murmurs, tilting into you.

“Mm-hmm...” you hum, tucking your head into Dirk's neck and nibbling at him almost instinctively. “So you should stop being a sourpuss and accept poor Charlie...”

Dirk's wonderful purring starts to fill the room, and you feel Charlie fly out of your hands, obviously moving onto more interesting impy things, leaving you with Dirk in the bathroom floor.

You feel extremely restless in a way you haven't before. You know what you want, but you also don't feel like lifting your head to ask for it. If only you could bite through Dirk's horribly impenetrable skin with your measly human teeth... Something inside of you is starting to spread, something almost...primal. It drives you to open your mouth and sink your teeth into Dirk's neck.

To your surprise and delight, you break through.

“Baby...!” Dirk gasps, and a tiny growl escapes your throat as you crawl into his lap, drinking from the wound you made. His hands trail down your back, and then something incredible happens. His fangs sink into your neck, biting you in return.

You whimper as the most intoxicating feeling you've ever experienced washes over you. Your blood flows into him as his flows into you, and your bond seems to react between you. You can feel Dirk's soul where it connects to yours, and you can feel something akin to a bridge build between you, giving this new primal urge inside you the ground it needs to get to Dirk like it needs to.

“ _Pet...”_ you whisper, licking your wound closed before you bite in a little higher, loving the way Dirk trembles against you, his hands clenching in your shirt. You grind down into his lap, your body running entirely off this new instinct, this insatiable desire. Dirk meets your every move, and you've never felt closer to him than in this instant, even with all you've done before.

“Yours...” you tell him, peppering kisses and licks up his neck, yanking his mouth to yours before you move to the other side of his neck, biting back in. “ _Mine..._ ”

“Hnnn...yours...” Dirk replies almost helplessly, his hands moving down to your ass, pressing you harder into his lap as he eagerly bites you again.

When you reach your orgasm, you feel your soul swirling with Dirk's, your blood mingled and blended perfectly between the two of you. Somehow, you know this is how true mates show their affection, and you know you've reached an important milestone, but you still have a while to go until you...

Until you what? The thought escapes you even as you try to grab hold of it again, desperate for answers.

Dirk is staring up at you almost dazedly, his orange eyes hooded as he pets your face, and it hits you that he came at the exact time you did. You have absolutely no idea what just took place between you, and you don't know how you did it. You'd be frightened if Dirk wasn't looking at you with such worship in his eyes, telling you without words that you did something right.

“How...” is all he says before you kiss him, taking his question without giving him an answer. He purrs for you, and you try to mimic him without knowing why, but your human voice won't let you. He scoops you in his arms and carries you downstairs to the bathroom in his room, undressing you both before he tugs you in the shower, where you immediately bite into him again, needing more of whatever just took place between you.

The rest of the night is a wonderful blur of mating, but you 're mildly irritated by Dirk observing your teeth numerous times, a furrow to his brows that proves he's no closer to finding any answers than you are.

The next morning finds you both in the coffee shop, though you actually wish you could be anywhere else. The thought makes you sad because you've never hated your job. You love making coffee and you love the people you meet while doing it. But you're so tired, and you're so so sick, and you can barely stand up. You sigh softly and lean against the counter, feeling more than ever like you're actually dying.

Dirk is tossing and turning in the corner, and you know he's having trouble sleeping because he's feeling your pain. The more your soul wraps around his, the more Dirk can tell exactly how you feel, and it's wearing on him. He finally peeks out from his cloak at you, and you give him a gentle smile, making your way over to him since you have no customers.

“Still awake?” you ask, sitting on the beanbag next to him. He makes a noise and pulls you into his lap.

“Feel like shit,” he says, nuzzling into your neck. “Please let me take you home, baby.”

Your heart clenches because you want nothing more.

“I...can't... I need to save money...”

Dirk narrows his eyes at you, which you can barely see due to his shades.

“What exactly are you saving all this money for? I barely ever see you spend a dime on yourself, excluding fruit for the im— _Charlie_. There's no way your grandmother's medication costs _that_ much, right?” Dirk pulls you closer, and you melt against him, both because he's just so perfect, and also because he finally called Charlie by his name.

“Gramma needs surgery,” you tell him easily, wondering why you haven't already told him this. “She has a weak heart, something to do with arteries or...something. I don't rightly recall the exact terminology. Her insurance won't cover all of it, and we don't have the money.”

“Baby,” Dirk says softly, pulling your hand to his mouth. He kisses your fingers. “Let me pay for it?”

You squirm in his lap, mulling it over. “But...it's _so much_ money, Dirk...” you say. “I've been working for so long and I've still only managed to gather enough money for the measly halfway point.” You look at your feet, flushing. “Gramma is a very proud lady and won't accept any help, not even from John's dad. I...I doubt she'd even let _me_ pay for it, honestly.”

“Jake, I don't give a damn if it cost me every cent I have,” Dirk tells you earnestly, his eyes looking fierce. “You can't keep working like this, not for any reason. I keep telling you I have plenty of money. Demon killing pays pretty well, if you haven't noticed.” His eyes soften, and he licks your cheek sweetly. “Please, let me take care of you.”

Dirk makes a lot of sense, which is probably why you avoid talking to him about your stupid ideas. You've always had some idiotic fantasy about taking care of everything yourself, being a hero of some sort. But here you are, your time running out, and you're no closer to saving anyone, not even yourself. Your grandmother means the world to you, and at least this way, you can be sure she'll be healthy long after you're gone. You nod slowly, defeated, and Dirk pulls you tighter against him, one of his hands threading in your hair.

“I'm not quitting my job,” you says, stubbornly, and Dirk snorts.

“Course not. That'd make my life _too_ easy, wouldn't it?”

You swat him away and then lean in to kiss him again, looping your arms around his neck. He makes you feel better, even when faced with so much uncertainty. You can't resist giving him everything you have, even if it's nothing but attention. You hear the door chime, signaling a customer, and you quickly scramble from Dirk's lap to serve them, only to find it's...John. He must have come in early to help you again. You glare at him, and John at least has the decency to look sheepish.

“Um...you can go home, if you want,” John says, moving past you to the counter, towards the back where he can get his apron and begin his shift. “I can take care of things. You're still sick.”

You run to the counter, blocking the door with your body, childishly folding your arms over your chest.

“I've decided you're banned from here until my shift is over,” you say, very seriously.

“Oh, Jake, stop being such a fucking kid,” John snaps, letting you know he's not in the mood for this.

“That's rich, coming from you,” you retaliate, still blocking John. “Where's David? I'd quite like to lecture him as well. Neither of you had any right to do what you did!”

John's face changes from angry to hurt, and he tries to shove past you.

“I don't want to talk about it! I don't know where he is, okay?! Can you just let me get to work, please?!” John shoves you, and you fall against the counter, the sharp corner digging into your stomach. You wince, a tiny whimper coming out of your mouth.

“Oh, shit. Jake? Jake, I didn't mean to—“

Strong arms scoop you up, cuddling you into a firm, sturdy chest, and you inhale Dirk's scent greedily, breathing him in, feeling safe. You hear him growl at John.

“Keep your fuckin' hands off _my mate_ ,” Dirk snarls.

“Why, so you can kill him faster?” John asks, venom lacing his words. You feel Dirk flinch.

“Stop it!” You cry, forgetting your pain and holding your hand out, pushing weakly against John's chest. “Nothing is Dirk's fault! Stop being so mean to him when I _asked_ for this! Be angry with _me_. Not him!”

“How do you expect anyone to just be okay with this, Jake?!” John snarls, his fist hitting the wall, making you jump in surprise. “You made this decision to be cool with dying, so everyone is supposed to sit back and let you? Is that how it is? Well, fuck that! Fuck _you_. You don't get to decide how the people who love you feel. I didn't ask to feel anything at all!”

You're quiet as John stands there, glaring hatefully at you, his blue eyes filling with tears. You know, deep down, it's not only this that's upsetting him. You can practically feel his despair in the air. He didn't ask how to feel, not about you, and not about Dave. That's what he means.

“I'm sorry...” you say, softly, wanting him to know you mean for more than just yourself. You walk tentatively towards him, holding your arms open for him in invitation. John only manages to glower at you a moment longer before crashing into you, burying his face in your neck and sobbing, his hands clenching in your shirt to the point you worry it might rip.

“This—is so fucking...unfair!” John's tiny voice whimpers, and you shush him, petting his hair. Dirk kisses the back of your head before he moves back into his dark corner, respecting your privacy, though you know he'll still be keeping tabs. Dirk is nothing if not observant.

You lead John to a table and sit beside him, keeping your hand on his knee as he cries himself out, angrily, wiping under his glasses, pushing them into his hair to better wipe his tears. You remain quiet until his tiny huffs of fury peter out into little sniffs, the anger visibly leaving his body, replaced with something else.

“Sorry,” he says softly, and you shake your head.

“You deserve to be sorry about hitting Dirk,” you inform him, “but not about anything else.” You scoot closer to him, keeping your voice low. “What's happened? What's upsetting you so badly?”

“Wha—what do you mean? You're _dying_ , is that not bad enough?” John asks, as petulantly as he can manage.

“You're upset about something else, too. I've known you too long and too well to miss that.” You smile encouragingly at him, reaching up to help him wipe his face. “Come now, what's going on in that head of yours? What's happened with David?”

“He doesn't like you calling him that, you know,” John huffs. He's quiet again for just a few moments, and then he says, very quietly, “Dave left me.”

“Left you?” you ask, confused. “Why would he leave you? The two of you were joined at the hip, just yesterday.”

“Because I'm a sack of shit,” John says, his anger returning. “And Dave got tired of it. I can't decide what I want, and because of that, because of _me_ , I lost him.”

You frown, letting John wallow in this rage filled self-pity a moment longer before you press.

“I'm afraid I'm still lost. What changed so quickly?”

John looks down at the table like he finds it interesting.

“All this stuff happening with you and Dirk is messing with my head,” he informs you. “Dave is the same as Dirk—not human, I mean. Am...I gonna end up...”

He doesn't finish, but you don't need him to.

“You're afraid of dying.”

John picks at a loose thread in his jeans.

“Well, John, I certainly can see your fear in that,” you say with a humorless laugh. “But your fears are silly, in this case. David can't do anything without your consent. There's _some_ honor among demons, I've found.”

“Why would I ever _want_ to give him my soul?” John mutters incredulously.

“Because it's wonderful,” you say before you can think about it. “Because it's the purest love there is.”

“You're so weird.”

“You've told me that before.”

John studies you closely. “You really do want all of this. You love that jerk enough to die for him?”

“It was never my intention to die. I'm...still not _completely_ certain death is where all of this will end for me. Part of me feels it's inevitable, and the other part of me feels like death is something I'll experience more than once, in a strange way. Either way, however it turns out, I don't regret a thing I've done. Dirk is the best thing that's ever happened to me. He...makes me want to believe in miracles.”

You can feel Dirk looking at you from his spot in the corner, and you don't need to meet his gaze to know how touched he is by your words. John, however, makes a face.

“Gross.”

“Oh, grow up,” you say, waving him off. “Anyhow, you need to do some thinking, it seems.” You stand, wincing at the pain in your stomach, and again at the way the world spins. You right yourself against the table, ignoring John's concerned look. “You should think about what you want. If there's one thing I know about demons, it's that they feel things even more strongly than us. I'm sure David is in agony without you.”

“Yeah, right,” John says, laughing a bit.

“He loves you,” you say, and John's face turns bright red.

“That's just— He barely knows me!”

“He's a demon,” you remind him. “Time doesn't matter to them. Besides...I quite think you love him, too.”

You move back to Dirk, holding your hand out to him.

“Are you ready to go? I think I'll accept John's offer today. I'm not feeling so great.”

 _Yeah. I know that already._ You hear in Dirk's head, and you swat at him tiredly.

“None of that,” you tell him, and he grins at you. He scoops you up easily, carrying you to the car, and as soon as you're both inside inside, you scoot closer to him, tucking against his side. You sigh happily against his shoulder, closing your eyes.

“So we'll talk more about your grandmother's surgery later?” Dirk asks, and you hum tiredly.

“Yes. Later, when I'm less tired.”

Around sunset then, most likely. That seems to be how it is lately.

 _It's weird as hell. Sunset should be when you're tired_. Dirk supplies helpfully.

“Mmhmm...”

You nod off against him, dreaming both of you are a pair of sea otters, Dirk's paw in yours as you drift happily downstream.

“Do you think I'll be well enough to work tomorrow?” you ask, looking up at the sun in the sky, worried about this as if it's a legitimate concern for otters. Otter Dirk snorts.

“Who cares? You aren't human anymore.”

You accept this, feeling in your very soul that it's absolute, more concrete than anything else you know. You aren't human anymore, and soon everything is going to change.

***

You haven't moved at all today, and you wonder if you should at least work up the energy to shower.

You're Dave Strider, and life just ain't fair.

Your mate _would_ have to be a human. A human who has no clue just how much you love him, what you'd do for him. And the worst part is you can't even tell him, because he would just be scared away.

You curse your brother as you lie in your own misery. Dirk always gets what he wants, in some form or fashion. You don't doubt that if Jake really _does_ die, Dirk will march into whatever afterlife Jake finds himself in, and punch the reaper in the face to take Jake back. Dirk's just always been like that, and you find it very unfair that Jake jumped into Dirk's arms willingly, and you've had to coax John to so much as look at you since you met him.

You laugh to yourself, rubbing your face in your hands. You don't know what you expected, what you thought you deserved. John was never yours to keep, and you knew that, in some way. He's something too good, too pure. He has that house in the suburbs with a grand piano in the living room, a dad that loves him, and a future without you.

You think you've known that all along.

You flip mindlessly through T.V. channels, wanting to find something to binge watch and erase your thoughts when you hear it: footsteps on your stairs.

Did you lock your door? Probably not. You forget to do that a lot, because honestly, whatever came to kill or rob you really doesn't stand a fucking chance.

Is it Dirk? No. Dirk would barge in much faster than this. He'd probably be carrying a pile of Smuppets, too. It's how he is.

So then. That only leaves...

“Dave?” John asks tentatively, looking very small at the bottom of your stairs. You sit up to look at him better.

“John,” you reply, feigning indifference. “Doin' a bit of home invasion?”

“Well, I—I knocked, but. Um. Your door was open, so.” John fidgets, rubbing his knuckles together. “Can we talk?”

“You're already talkin',” you say, flopping back down on the couch. “So keep right on truckin'.”

“Is this how it's going to be?” John asks, his voice stronger. He moves to the front of the couch, glaring down at you. “You're going to act indifferent to me, like you don't care what I say or do?”

“Why not? I've already let you know how I feel, and you didn't seem to care.”

John flinches, and his eyes lose their rage. He sits on the arm of the couch, and you've never seen him look so sad.

Even now, you want to hold him and fight whatever could make him so sad, even if he's hurting you. Even if he kills you. You love him so much it's tearing you up inside, and you hate him at the same time, because John doesn't care.

“I... I never meant to make you think I don't care,” John says quietly. “I care more about what you think than most people.”

Well. That's certainly news to you.

John looks at you with hurt in his eyes. “You left me.”

You snort. “I didn't think you'd care.”

“Or course I care!” John snaps, moving from the arm of the couch to the cushion. “Why do you get to come barging into my life and make me want you, and then leave when I get confused?! It hasn't been easy for me, Dave!”

“Oh, well, pardon me, _John_ , for messin' up your head. That was real fuckin' wrong of me. Maybe I should just pull the biggest apology you've ever heard out of my ass, except you wouldn't listen to it anyway. It's been hard for _you?_ You literally pull me as close as you can and then push me away. And not once, John, no, you're a fuckin' _pro_ at it. You do it over and over, and I'm a goddamn yo-yo at the end of a long ass string, always comin' back for more. You think not knowin' what you want is the hardest thing in life? Well it fuckin' isn't. The _worst_ thing is when you know exactly what you want, and it doesn't want you back!”

You sit up entirely, pulling away from him to the other end of the couch, glaring at him through the darkness of your basement, his face illuminated by the T.V.

“So I guess I'm sorry for messin' up the great things you had goin' on in your life. You can go now, get right back to it, and I'll stay the hell away from now on. Like you want.”

“I don't want that!” John sobs, breaking down, and you feel your anger leave you like a frightened, beaten down thing, scurrying into a corner to think about what it's done. “I w-want _you!_ ”

You feel yourself moving to him before you know it, pulling him in your arms. He relaxes against you instantly, crawling into your lap, pressing his face into your neck. It's amazing, even now, how much he fits you, his body tailor-made for yours. Everything about him is yours. It hurts even more because you can feel he knows it, and he's still running.

“I'm stupid,” John mumbles, muffled in your neck. “I'm just a stupid human, Dave, and I'm confused. Not because I...don't want you...but because it's different from everything I've wanted. With you I feel like...it's going to be forever—no, fuck that, I _know_ it is. You're this unknown thing that's an entirely different path from the one I wanted, and I'm confused because I want you _more_.” He pulls back and looks at you determinedly, blinking through his tears. “I don't know how much I'm...ready for. But I'm ready for _you_. For...for _this_. Whatever this is. I don't ever want you to leave me again.”

“Careful there,” you say shakily, “offerin' yourself to a demon is serious shit.”

John blushes, but he doesn't back down. He puts his fingers under your jaw and tips it up, pressing his mouth carefully and firmly against yours, kissing you gently and then hungrily, his body pushing yours down into the couch cushions. You feel his arousal against your thigh, and your own body heats up in response, sensing your mate is in need of you. But...but John isn't ready for this, is he?

“Should...should I, um...?”

John laughs breathlessly against your lips and then tucks his face against yours, panting against your cheek.

“Yeah, I think it's okay. Just...you know. Not too much?”

You snort. Like you'd just rip his pants off and jam your dick into him. No class, no ass. That's your motto.

Keeping your eyes on him for any hint of distress and reservation, you unzip his jeans and carefully, _carefully_ reach inside, pressing into his boxers. You both exhale when your fingers wrap around him, and John's face twitches, his teeth biting into his lip.

“Yuh...yeah, that's...that's definitely good,” John says, his head tipping back, and you instinctively nuzzle against his neck, lapping at his skin as you pump him in your hand. You glance down at your hand disappearing into his jeans, and you pull him free with a hungry growl, your eyes widening when you finally see his dick locked in your grip, dribbling precum already, flushed and swelled with want for you. You lick your lips and watch closely as your hand moves along him.

“Daaaaave...” John gasps, falling apart in your lap, pushing into your hand all he can, burying his face against your hair. “Can't...mmm... Gonna come...!”

Already? You smile and lock your free hand around his waist, holding him to you as he tugs and pants against your hair, whimpering as he finally goes over the edge of bliss, coming all over your shirt, his dick twitching in your hand. You watch it all, captivated, and you don't hesitate to bring your fingers to your mouth, tasting your mate for the first time, a soft purr leaving your throat.

John is watching you with heavy-lidded eyes, his pupils so large there's almost no blue in his eyes.

“Should I do you?” he asks, and you snort again at his tiny, uncertain voice.

“Nah. I'll take care of it in the shower,” you tell him, watching his face fall. “Easy there, my young Padawan,” you grin. “Can't play with the lightsaber just yet. You're too fresh.”

“Oh my god, shut up,” John laughs, going boneless on top of you, conquered and content from his orgasm. You hold him close, petting him, smiling as he kisses your hair.

The smile doesn't vanish for the rest of the night, even when you fall asleep with him in your arms.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Questions? Comments? FAN ART?!?!?!?!
> 
> [Sachi](http://sachi-sama.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
> [LateNiteSlacker](http://lateniteslacker.tumblr.com/)


	13. Bonds with Humans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it's been a while. The anniversary of Homestuck 4/13 seems like the right time to kick this story off again. Sachi and I have been talking about it a lot, and despite what it may seem like, this story is still very near and dear to our hearts. We love these characters and we love this story. We're really looking forward to bringing you the rest of Blood and Coffee!

 

It’s dark.  Everything is quiet.  You’re lying in your boyfriend’s arms.

Your BOYFRIEND’S arms.

You can barely hear the sound of Dave’s light snoring over the wild beating of your own heart.

You are John Egbert, and you think you might be having a panic attack.

Quietly, you slide out of Dave’s long cuddly arms and slip to the bathroom.  Your breathing is rapid and you feel your heart hammering loudly in your chest.  You splash some cold water onto your face.  You guess it helps a little.

Slowly, you lift your head up and regard your reflection in the mirror.

“You.  You always said you weren’t a homosexual,” your voice becomes choked as you look at yourself.  Your eyes well with tears, and you quickly splash more cold water onto your face before they can drip down your cheeks.

You’re not crying.  This isn’t a big deal.

You make a tiny sound of frustration and wipe the water from your face using Dave’s hand towel.  Then you look resolutely back into the mirror.  You stiffen your upper lip and square your jaw like your dad always taught you to do.  Life might be hard, but you have to roll with the punches.  You have to take it like a man.

“You’re gay,” you say to yourself, looking into your own clear blue eyes.  “You _are_ a homosexual.  And your boyfriend is a vampire.”

Despite all those words about manning up, you don’t feel very manly right now.  There are tears in your eyes again.  You blink, letting them run down your cheek.  You look into the mirror and say louder, “you ARE a homosexual! Your boyfriend is a VAMPIRE.  And you’re probably going to DIE.”

Your heart is pounding in your chest faster than ever.  You feel dizzy and your head is spinning.  You hold onto the countertop and lean over the sink, feeling like you want to throw up.

But you don’t throw up.  You stand there for several minutes, letting the tears pour down your cheeks and drip into the sink. 

There’s no denying it.  You’re hopelessly in love with Dave.  There’s nothing you could possibly do to stop it, and you don’t think you’d want to stop it.

You almost think this is something even deeper than love.  You want to _own_ Dave.  You want to keep him forever and _be_ Dave.

The impulse is so strong it’s overwhelming.  It scares you a lot.  Even though you’ve had the feeling for a while now, you haven’t become used to it.  It’s only grown stronger as you’ve become closer to Dave.

Tonight when Dave pleasured you, it felt better than anything you’ve ever experienced.  It was more than just a hand-job.  You felt his soul, and it was a little frightening.  It was like standing on an island surrounded by stormy ocean waves. 

Dave’s soul wanted to consume you.  And you wanted to let him take it.  You whine softly and rub furiously at your tearing eyes.

Jake said it was wonderful.  He said bonding with Dirk and linking their souls together was the best thing he’s ever done.

But it’s easy to see that Jake is dying.  Dirk’s demonic soul is snuffing the life out of your poor cousin.

You have no doubt that Dave’s soul would do the same to you.

“S’matter babe?”

You scream a little and jump when Dave suddenly appears in the doorway.

“I-I couldn’t sleep,” you tell him, not wanting to worry him with all of your thoughts. 

You think that Dave probably has some idea of what’s been on your mind though.  He took off his sunglasses before bed, and he didn’t put them back on before coming to check on you.  You can see into his beautiful red eyes. The way he looks at you is a little tormented.  A little sad.

“Jake’s dying,” you finally murmur.

“I know,” he sighs and closes his eyes for a moment before fixing them on you. His gaze is nothing short of piercing.  You feel it like a jab into your very soul.

“Does Dirk know?” you ask.

Dave shrugs, but he says, “he’s gotta.  We both kinda punched him in the face and told him so.  Unless he’s so caught up in this bondin’ business that he’s ignorin’ the obvious. That’d be like him, to just keep ploddin’ on like the star of his own shitty romance film ignorin’ the facts till it all blows up in his face.  Not sure where that leaves me. His shitty little sidekick that has to come clean up his mess?  The antihero that gets screwed over by his douchey older brother?”

You shake your head.  “I don’t know anything about Dirk, and I have no idea why Jake is so enamored with him.”

“That makes two of us,” Dave remarks snidely.

“But I do know that Jake looks—happy,” you say, your expression morphing into something weird as you try to wrap your head around it.  “Jake’s dying, but he’s happy.  Happier than I’ve ever seen him.”

“Do I make you that happy?” Dave asks quietly. You might be making it up, but you think you see fear in his eyes as he looks at you.  He seems so afraid. So exposed.

You exhale a small breath and smile softly at him.  “Yeah. Yeah you do.  Don’t look at me like that. I’m not changing my mind. I’m not leaving you.  I’m just… scared.”

“Babe…” he murmurs, walking forward to silently wrap you in his arms. 

Safe in his embrace, you feel your breathing even out.  Your heart calms down.  Your very soul relaxes as you lean against his chest.  “I’m scared Dave,” you tell him again.

“I know,” he says. “I am too.  I don’t know anything about any of this. But I see what Dirk’s soul is doing to Jake.  I don’t want mine to do that to you.  If you were to grow that weak and die, I’d die right after you.”

“Stop being dramatic,” you reprimand him softly.

“M’not being dramatic,” he responds petulantly. “I’m tellin’ the truth.  If we bond and you die, I’ll die too.”

“If we bond, you’ll die when I die?” you ask, your eyes widening.

“Yep,” Dave agrees. “That’s how it is for vampires and their mates.  If the ship is sinking, both’ll go down. No such thing as a life-raft.”

“Then,” you pause, thinking about what he said. It takes you a moment before you look into his eyes and continue. “Then I don’t want to bond.  I don’t want you to die.”

You were hoping your words would comfort Dave.  For some reason, they have the opposite effect. 

Dave looks devastated. 

You think you see Dave’s very soul recoil with sadness at your words.

“Dave, are you ok?” you ask, suddenly concerned about him.  Dave looks terrible. Now _he’s_ the one that you think is having a panic attack. His pale skin somehow looks paler, and there’s a sheen of sweat over him.  His hands feel clammy as he fumbles to grip your hands.

“Y-yeah, I’m fine just—” he trails off and blows out a long breath. “Fuck this isn’t fair.”

“You _want_ to bond and die?” you ask incredulously.

“Yes!” Dave answers instantly, startling you a little bit.  He lowers the volume of his voice and explains, “Yes.”

“But why?” You ask, not understanding at all.  “Why would you possibly want to die?!”

“For vampires, findin’ your mate is like winning the fuckin’ lottery.  And bondin’ with them is like winning it every second of every day,” he explains.

“Really?  Dirk seemed pretty miserable.” You eye Dave skeptically as you think of how weary and miserable Dirk looked in the corner of the coffee shop.

“Course he did, Jake has him up at the crack of dawn. Nobody in their right mind gets up that early, ‘specially not vampires,” Dave sighs back. He looks really upset, and you would swear he has more to say.  But he doesn’t.  Instead, he shakes his head and says, “let’s just forget about the bondin’ thing for now.  We’ll just… talk about it later?”

You really don’t think there’s much to talk about.  You don’t want to bond now that you know it will kill Dave.  And you also like living too.  But you decide to humor Dave and nod.  “Ok, we’ll talk about it later.”

Dave seems a little relieved by your answer. 

For a few more moments, you both stand awkwardly in the bathroom in silence.  Neither of you know what to say.  What _do_ you say after something like that?

Maybe there isn’t anything you can say.  It feels like when you’ve attended funerals with your father and faced the grieving family members.  You never knew what to say.

In a sense, you’re in the same position now.  You’re faced with not only Jake’s imminent death but your own as well.

If you decide to bond with him, anyway. 

More time passes, and you’re nowhere closer to having words than you were before.

In the end, it’s Dave that breaks the silence.  “Let’s go back to bed, Babe.  It’s 6 in the morning.  No human or vampire should be up at this hour.”

You have to agree with him on that one. You nod and let Dave lead you back to bed.

 

*             *             *

 

Several hours later, you wake again.  Dave is still fast asleep beside you.  Of course he is.  When you glance at the clock, it reads 10:30 AM.  No vampire in his right mind would be up at this time of day.

But you are not a vampire.  You’re very much a human being.  A….. _homosexual_ …. Human being.  But a human being nonetheless.

You slowly get up, gathering your clothes and heading back home.

When you get home, your dad has already left for work.  It saves you the effort of explaining where you were last night.  Your dad always pretends he’s understanding, but you know that he wouldn’t understand this at all.

Even if your dad didn’t care that you were a homosexual, you know he would never approve of your choice in boyfriends.  A vampire?  That will inevitably kill you someday?

Nobody in their right mind would ever want that for their son.  How could you ever tell your father the truth?

Feeling sick to your stomach, you gather your things and head into work early.  When you lay your eyes on Jake behind the counter, you nearly cry out in pain.

Jake looks like death.  His eyes are bleak and lifeless, and his skin is sallow and unhealthy looking.

Quickly, you rush behind the counter and usher Jake over to the corner where Dirk is snoozing away. “Jake, why didn’t you call me?!  I’d have come in early for you!  I was up anyway!” you reprimand him as you tuck him into the beanbags.

You watch as Dirk sleepily pulls Jake in close to his chest, hugging him.  It might be your imagination, but you think you hear a deep pleased sounding rumble from Dirk’s chest.

“Couldn’t ask you to do that,” Jake says weakly.  He lays his head on Dirk’s chest and moans softly in what sounds like pain.  Despite looking like he’s on death’s door, he still glances at you in concern, “Why… were you up early?”

“I couldn’t sleep,” you murmur quietly, giving Jake the same lie you fed Dave earlier.

Jake doesn’t seem to buy it.  You can tell in the way he looks at you. “You’re… my cousin, John.  Don’t… lie to me.”

“You’re dying,” you finally say, your voice a nearly silent whisper now.  “I’m so worried about you.  And Dave… someday if we go the same way, then I…”

You don’t have the strength to finish that last statement.  Nor do you have the time.  One angry customer is ringing the service bell at you obnoxiously, not understanding why Jake isn’t jumping to make him a latte.

You turn around and glare at the line of customers. Your expression is a complete 180 from your usual sunny disposition.  A couple of the customers in line actually take a fearful step back.  But one outspoken man, the one who was ringing the bell, points angrily to Jake and says, “does he feel like working today?  What am I paying him for, to take a nap?”

“Sir, you aren’t paying us for anything today,” you say, your voice barely concealing your anger.  How DARE he say that sort of thing to Jake when he’s clearly sick and dying?!

“Good, this better be on the house for all the trouble he’s given me,” the man complains.

“That’s not what I meant,” you say, marching angrily up to him.  He’s taller than you, but you really don’t give a damn.  You could beat the shit out of him right now for the way he’s talking to your cousin. “You aren’t getting coffee here today.”

“What?” the man looks shocked by your response.

“You aren’t getting coffee here ever again.  You aren’t welcome here.  Get out,” you say, pointing to the door. 

“I don’t believe this.  This is the worse customer service I’ve ever had!” he man roars.  “I demand to speak to a manager!”

“You already did, and you didn’t seem to care that he’s sick,” you say, gesturing to Jake.

Jake is the daytime manager of this store, and he literally works himself to death. 

For what?  For people’s coffee fix?  For absolutely zero gratitude?

You can’t take it anymore.  Jake’s dying and nobody seems to care.  Not even Jake. 

You turn your gaze hatefully back to the man and shout. “You couldn’t wait for two fucking seconds for me to put on a shitty little apron and get you your fucking latte! What’s so important that you can’t spare two minutes out of your fucking afternoon?!  If you need your coffee so badly, you can take your business to Starbucks down the street from now on. You’re welcome to drink the rat piss they strain through a moldy ceiling tile, brew in a dumpster, and call coffee!”

The man seems so shocked or so angry that he doesn’t have any more words.  His cheeks turn red with anger as he storms to the door.  “You see if I ever come back here again!” he shouts, slamming the door behind him.

“Don’t come back!” You shout after him.  You glare at him as he walks down the street, and you huff in smug satisfaction as he walks straight past the Starbucks.  Apparently you’ve cured him of his desperate need for coffee today.

Finally, you glance around the store and realize that literally everyone is staring at you.  Even Dirk woke up and is looking at you with mild surprise.

You glance at the people who are still shockingly in line and bow your head to them.  “I apologize that you all had to see that.  I’ll be happy to get you coffee if you could give me a couple minutes to attend to my sick cousin.”

There’s a chorus of agreeable murmurs.  For some reason, everyone is willing to wait however long you need.

You hurry back to Jake’s side and you almost cry when he lays a hand on you.  Jake’s hand is chilled and feels clammy.  His green eyes have lost their luster.  Still, he manages to choke out to you, “John… you shouldn’t have…”

“Yes, I should have, and I’m glad I did,” you tell him, wrapping your hands around his to give him some more warmth.  “He had no business saying those things to you.”

“He’ll… give us bad… Yelp reviews,” Jake complains weakly.

“Seriously? You’re _dying_ and you’re worried about stupid Yelp reviews?” You sigh at your impossible cousin and push him back down into the beanbags when he struggles to get up.  “I’m working the rest of your shift today. You go home and—”

“Can’t,” Jake interrupts you, shaking his head.  “It’s a manager’s duty… to stay his shift.”

“Jake, you’re really impossible, you know that?” You huff a sigh and shake your head. “Well, fine then.  I’m still working your shift.  You just sit there and…. Focus on getting better.”

You get up and start making people coffee.  You have to, otherwise you know you’ll just end up crying again.  Jake has been near and dear to you your entire life, and you can’t stand the thought of him not being around anymore.

The minutes turn into hours, and soon it’s time for your regular evening shift.  You gently lay a hand on Jake’s shoulder. “Hey, Jake, you really can go home now.  It’s not even your shift anymore.”

Jake is completely passed out. He doesn’t even move when you touch his shoulder, but Dirk does.

“Thank fucking god,” Dirk murmurs, picking Jake up and swaddling him in his cloak.

You glare at Dirk as he wraps up your sick cousin.  You know he’s the one killing Jake.  You know he will be responsible for Jake’s murder.

Dirk glances at you but doesn’t comment.  He simply carries Jake out the door and leaves.

Another good riddance.

You sigh and lounge on the counter.  Unlike Jake’s shift, your shift is usually slow.  People don’t want coffee at night like they do in the morning.  Sure, you get the occasional college student who wants to stay up studying for exams, but that’s about it.

The rest of the time is sheer boredom.

Without even realizing it, you wistfully murmur, “Dave…”

You know that your work shift will be better with him around.  It always is.

A few minutes later, he appears at the door.  The sunny smile spreads across your face as you see him. The entire world seems lighter and brighter.

It’s nearly sunset, but he’s still wearing his day cloak to ward off the last dying rays of the sun.  He doesn’t hesitate to come behind the counter and pull you into his arms.  Your lips are on his before you even consider that you’re out in public. 

He’s your boyfriend.  You’re allowed to kiss him if you want to.

You could kiss him all day.  But soon, you feel your body responding to him, wanting more than kisses.  Gently, you push him away.  “I have to work, Dave.  We can’t, umm…” your voice trails off.

Dave eyes you mischievously and murmurs, “we can’t _what_ , John?”

You feel your face flush with embarrassment!  You can’t believe Dave is making you talk about this in public!  You lower your voice and whisper, “we can’t do _that_ right now.”

“Can’t do _what_?” he asks again, with a shit eating grin on his face.

“Shut up, you know what I’m talking about!” you whisper at him fiercely and push him towards the dark corner of the shop.  The bell above the door jingles again, and you turn your attention to a group of college students.  They’re each holding a giant stack of books.  They hold the front door open for each other with their feet as they pour in.  You get the feeling they’re preparing for an all-nighter.  Sure enough, they all set their books down and come to your counter to order coffee.

You’re so absorbed in their order that you don’t notice the unusual figure that slips in after them.

It isn’t until the man reaches the counter that you notice him.  You get a lot of strange customers at the store, particularly at night, but this guy is different from the rest.

When you met Dave, you knew something was different about him.  But Dave  was different in a good way.  He was different in the beautiful ethereal sense.  Different in the fact that you knew you wouldn’t mind him fucking you up the wall someday.

You flush and push the strange sexual thought away.

This guy is completely different. He’s bald and has a couple of gold teeth, but that isn’t what tips you off about him.  He has a peculiar green aura to him, one that makes you think of a venomous snake. He looks human. The college students don’t even bat an eyelash as they walk around him with their books and coffee.

He blends in almost seamlessly with humans.  Almost.

Nobody else may have noticed, but you do.  You know something is completely off about this guy.  It’s more than him being the type of deranged person who begs for change on the city corner and masturbates on the train in broad daylight.  It’s more than the drunken winos that sometimes stagger into your store looking for a warm place to spend the night.

This guy reeks of primal evil.

Your fingers clench into the countertop a little, making your knuckles white.  But you force yourself to smile at him and say, “hello sir, what can I get you today?”

“It’s actually almost night.  Isn’t it?” the guy says, looking at you in a way that makes you feel self-conscious.  You feel like this guy can see into your very soul, and it’s frightening.

In a flash, Dave is by your side.  Immediately, you feel relieved. 

“Hey, what’d you want, man?  He just works here.  Leave him outta this.  If you’ve got a problem, you take it up with me,” Dave says.  There’s a hard look on his face, and even from behind his day cloak, you can tell he’s reaching for the katana he carries around with him.

“Another Strider?” the man laughs, and it sounds like the most horrible thing you’ve ever heard.  “I should have known. The Striders would plant more of their seed in this realm too.”

You want to ask what the guy is talking about, but you hold back. The way Dave is looking at him, actually baring his fangs a little at him, tells you this is something way above your pay-grade.

“I asked what you want here.  If it isn’t coffee, then we’ll take this outside,” Dave says, his voice lowering into what you would swear is almost a growl.

You’re frightened by the weird man, and you know Dave is ready for a fight. But something about Dave’s voice, and the way he’s so ready to fight to protect you, makes you feel almost turned on.

Again, you push the weird sexual thought aside and try to focus on the conversation.

The sinister man grins, showing off those gold teeth in a way that makes you feel extremely uncomfortable. “I’m not here for a fight. Baby Strider.”

“I’m no baby,” Dave growls back quickly.

“A Strider out in the daylight.  There’s only one thing I can think of. That would make a Strider do that.” For some reason, this makes the man’s creepy smile stretch further across his face.  He suddenly turns his gaze to you, and you feel yourself nearly leap out of your skin.  “You look like him.  But you aren’t him.  It’s a pity.”

Dave is quickly losing his patience.  You can tell because he’s leaning against the counter now, his snarl fully showing off his fangs to anyone who might glance his way.  But you don’t see any of the customers right now. You don’t see anything other than Dave and this sinister man.  The world has gone eerily silent around you and your vision appears saturated in a cold blue. 

“Get. Out.” Dave growls.

Somehow, this still doesn’t seem to surprise or even threaten the man at all.  He laughs, and again it’s that terrible honking sound.  “Tell Jake I said hello.”

Dave looks ready to leap over the counter and start a fight right here in the coffee shop.  But before he can, the ominous man turns around and leaves.

The bell jingles as he walks through the door.

Several seconds pass by.  You’re covered in a cold sweat.  Dave is standing beside you, gritting his teeth.

You look down and realize you’re still gripping the countertops.  Your hands are cold, clammy, and in pain from your tight grip of the countertop.  Slowly, you let go.

Slowly, the tension leaves.

You aren’t certain how long it takes, but eventually, color, light, and sound return.  You smell the familiar scent of the coffee shop and hear the quiet murmur of the college students as they study together.  It looks like they didn’t even notice what happened.

Dave turns to you, and there’s an apprehensive look on his face.  You don’t really even know what to say after that.  Eventually, you hear yourself ask, “who was that?  WHAT was that?”

“He’s a demon,” Dave says, relaxing his grip on his katana.  “Think you already guessed that, though.”

You nod at him quietly.  “Yeah.  He didn’t seem like a good one.”

“He’s not,” Dave answers.  His brows furrow in concentration as he thinks back.  “He seems familiar.  Like I’ve just seen him and beat his ass the last year or so.  Can’t quite remember which demon he was though. I hunt so many of them every night.”

“Is he like that annoying guy Cronus?” you ask helpfully.

“Worse.  Cronus is annoying but he never actually hurts anyone.  But this guy,” Dave shakes his head, then presses his palm to his forehead and groans. “I can’t… remember anything from that far back. Dirk knows more about Derse and its demons.  All I know is he’s bad news.”

“He knew Jake,” you murmur, frowning as you try to think of any other annoying customers who could be demons.

Suddenly, Dave gasps.  It’s quiet and small, and if you weren’t listening for it, you probably would have missed it.  “He knew Jake.  Fuck, I bet…”

Dave’s pulling out his phone, pushing numbers quickly.  He looks worried as he lifts the phone to his ear and begins to talk. “Yeah, it is fuckin’ important.  You know that weird demon the other day that I totally had to save your ass from?  He just came to the coffee shop lookin’ for Jake.”

A sinking sensation fills you as you watch Dave talk and glance around the coffee shop.  The familiar corners look darker than usual.  The unlocked door makes you apprehensive of just who or what could come through.

You have the feeling this is the beginning of something terrible.

 

*             *             *

 

You are Dirk Strider, and it is too fucking early to wake up.  But you’re up and already pacing around your room as you try to think of what to do.

Caliborn is back.  Caliborn visited the café today looking for Jake.

He was looking for JAKE.

You can’t stop the deep growl from leaving your chest.  You hate Caliborn for what he’s done to Jake in the past.  You hate him for beating you in a fight so badly that Dave had to rescue you for the first time ever.  Dave didn’t know how dangerous Caliborn was, and he thankfully got the drop on him before Caliborn even knew he was there.  But if Caliborn had known Dave existed and had anticipated his arrival, that could have ended much worse.

You won’t let him touch your precious mate again. And you won’t let him put your little bro in danger.

Caliborn has to die and stay in Derse where he can’t get any of you.

But you don’t know how you’ll do that.  Demons always regenerate in Derse after they die.  And somehow, they always seem to find their way back to the human realm.  You could kill Caliborn a thousand times and he would keep coming back.

Again, you growl and return to your pacing.  You’re so caught up in your thoughts that you don’t even notice Jake’s awake until you feel his arms wrap around you from behind.

“What’s the matter?” he asks, his voice muffled into the back of your shirt.  “What’s gotten you so worked up that you’re awake before me?”

“Baby?” you turn, pulling Jake into your arms and hugging him tightly.  You smell his warm humanity and you smell his love.  Jake is so alive.  You really want to keep him that way.  “You’re all right?”

Jake chuckles, “I’m fit as a fiddle!  I don’t even feel sick at all.  It must have been the flu or something.”

You gaze at him harder and say skeptically, “the flu?”

“The flu can be quite severe,” Jake responds.

“A flu that only lasts during the daytime?” You persist.

“I see a lot of customers every day!  I bet they keep getting me sick!” Jake stammers.

“Baby you’re impossible,” you sigh, picking him up and carrying him back to the bed.  “But fuck if I don’t love you more than anything.”

“You sure know how to charm a guy,” Jake says, smiling softly as he lays back on the pillows.  Then, he seems to realize where you’ve put him and sits back up. “Wait.  Do you want sex or are you trying to put me back to sleep?”

“You need sleep, Baby,” you murmur, pushing him back into the pillows and tucking him in.  “You’re still sick.”

“See here, Strider, I am NOT sick!” Jake declares, batting away the pillows and sheets and sitting up defiantly.  “I’m right as rain, and I need to go out!  I should go see John and tell him not to worry about me.  He was so worried earlier today he even yelled at a customer and threw him out!”

You feel your face pale even more as Jake suggests going to the very coffee shop where Caliborn was earlier.  “No.”

Jake looks taken aback. “No?”

“No, I’m not lettin’ you go. It’s too dangerous,” you tell him, giving him your sternest look.

Jake’s look hardens, and his eyebrow quirks a little as he glares at you.  “What have we said about this?”

“I know, and I’ll face your shitty coffee revenge, but it’s too dangerous out there for you.  I’m not lettin’ you go,” you tell him with a sense of finality.

You won’t let him go out.  You won’t no matter what.

 

*             *             *

 

You’re suddenly John Egbert again, and you’re so glad your shift at the coffee shop is over!  Dave got a call for work, but he wouldn’t leave you alone in the shop.  Not after that guy came in earlier.

So he waited and brought you with him to work.  Dave has your hand wrapped protectively in his as you walk down the streets to where ghouls are causing problems.  For a while it’s just you two and the dark streets.  But your smile brightens when you see the other two people walking your way. 

“Jake!” you exclaim, breaking away from Dave.  You pull Jake into a hug and laugh as you see him miraculously well again.  “What happened? How are you better already?”

“I’m not sure, but I feel fine!” Jake reassures you. “Better than fine! I feel better than I’ve ever felt!”

You eye Jake warily because this is really weirding you out.  Jake was dying earlier today. You were sure he wasn’t long for this world.  But now, Jake really does look better than ever.

“I feel so good that Dirk even asked me to come along with him to work!” Jake says in a way that makes you very suspicious.

Sure enough, Dirk grumbles something inaudible in response.

The four of you walk down the darkened street until you hear a strange growling noise up ahead.

“That’s the ghouls,” Dave says.  He takes your hand again and leads you and Jake both towards a bookstore nearby. “Time for you two to chill in the shop for a few minutes.  Dirk and I’ll clean this up before you know it.”

“But I don’t want to go to the bookstore!” Jake complains. “I want to fight ghouls too!”

“Baby,” Dirk says, giving Jake a trying look.

No words are said between them, but you get the feeling they’re somehow conversing through their very glances at each other.

Jake eventually sighs and waves Dirk away. “Fine.  But I reserve the right to wander about if I get bored, so you better be quick!”

You and Jake stand in the doorway of the book store for no more than 10 seconds. It’s enough time for the Striders to dash out of view. Then Jake is tugging you by your hand and pulling you back outside.

“Jake!  Didn’t you hear them?  These ghouls are dangerous!” you whisper at him urgently.

“I know, that will make it more fun!” Jake agrees.  Seconds later, the little imp Jake adopted pokes its head out of Jake’s shirt, chirping in response.  “See, Charlie agrees!”

“You brought the imp with you?”

“Of course I brought Charlie with me!  I couldn’t leave him out of the fun!”  Jake says.  He sees the way you’re looking at him and huffs, “Oh come now, don’t you give me that look.  We’ll all be fine! Besides, we won’t get in the Striders’ way.  We’ll just have a look.  Don’t you want to see Dave in action?”

You think back to those weird sexual thoughts you had when Dave was threatening Caliborn earlier today.  It makes you flush. You really do like seeing Dave fight for you.

“Ok, fine.  But we’re staying back.  Like, waaay back,” you reluctantly agree.

“Way back it is!” Jake agrees.

You both very stealthily sneak up to where Dirk and Dave are fighting the ghouls.  They’re fighting what looks like an entire harbor filled with demons.  They’re everywhere.

Dave and Dirk are both a blur of movement as they dash around with their katanas, dusting ghouls and sending them back to Derse.

You imagine as you watch them that Dave is fighting for your honor.  Dave is a brave ninja warrior fighting the forces of evil to protect you.  It’s poetic and far more romantic than you ever thought fighting demons could be.

Somehow, you get the feeling you aren’t far from the truth. Dave has told you this much in the past.

Dave would do anything for you.  Your BOYFRIEND would do anything for you.

Dave would die for you.

The thought is overwhelming, but at the same time, it floods you with the purest love.

The moment is short-lived.  Suddenly, you hear a tiny squeak and feel Jake pull away from you.  You turn to see Jake running down a darkened alleyway after the imp.

“Charlie, no!  Come back here!” he shouts, running after him.

The romantic moment of fighting has passed.  Concerned, you run after them, finding it hard to keep up with Jake.  Jake was always more physically adept than you, but he seems even faster than he used to be.  You know you’re not that out of shape!

Finally, you catch up to him. You are out of breath, puffing shallow breaths of air through your cheeks as you walk up to him.  “Jake… thought we were gonna… stay way back??”

“We were going to, but then sweet Charlie here wanted to explore and…” Jake turns around to face you, his eyes widening.  “John look out!!!”

It all happens so quickly.  You can’t keep up with what’s going on.

You feel a rush of wind at your back, hear a growling sound, and feel a stab of searing pain in your left shoulder.  You turn to the side and see the hideous head of a ghoul, its teeth locked firmly into your shoulder.  You feel nauseated as you smell its foul breath on you.  You cry out in pain as it bites deeper into your skin.

You see Jake’s eyes light with rage, a feral look in his eyes as he leaps your way.  The ghoul must see Jake coming, because it stops biting you and leaps up a streetlamp.  You must be feverish or disoriented from the pain, because there’s no way Jake could possibly follow it.  Jake can’t jump that far, or that high.  There’s no way Jake could climb half-way up the brick wall and leap to the lamplight to tackle the hideous looking ghoul luring there.

But by some trick of the mind, you see it all.  You see Jake climb the wall, jump 15 feet to the lamp-post, tackle the demon to the ground, and tear into it with his fingers and teeth.

“…Jake?” you murmur, feeling your head swim.  You start to sweat, feeling far too hot.  You look down at your shoulder and see nasty looking jagged teeth marks.  You briefly wonder if the demon poisoned you when it bit you.

Suddenly, Jake is laying on the ground beside you, looking ill himself.  The demon beside him is dead, but Jake looks horrible.

Your vision goes hazy.  You think you might have passed out for a few seconds, but you’re not really sure.

The next thing you know, Dave is beside you, saying something. Dave looks frightened as hell.  His mouth is on your shoulder, and you feel him drinking your blood from where the demon bit you.  But wait… he doesn’t drink your blood.  He’s spitting it out onto the ground?

Dave must see your concern, because he says, “sorry, John.  I’ve gotta get the poison out.”

You feel light-headed again.  You’re not sure how many times Dave does it, but eventually you feel less hot. Eventually, you can see again, and move a little again.  “Dave…. Is Jake ok?” you murmur.

Dave adjusts you in his arms so you can see across the way.  You see Dirk cradling Jake in a similar way that Dave has you.  “He’ll be fine,” Dave assures you.  “Dirk’s got him.”

“Oh good,” you murmur, feeling relieved.  Jake will be fine because Dirk has him.  And you’ll be fine because Dave has you.

“Love you, Dave,” you hear yourself murmuring.  “Always wanna…”

Your voice fades away.  Everything fades as Dave pulls you into his arms and carries you away.

 

*             *             *

 

You are Dirk Strider, and that was way too fucking close.  You don’t know what possessed Jake into thinking he could take on one of those ghouls by himself.  But because he did, he almost got himself and John killed.  You heard an earful from Dave already, and you both sent several angry texts back and forth after that. 

You were sure it was John’s fault.  Dave was sure it was Jake’s fault.

Somehow you get the feeling it’s Jake’s fucking imp’s fault.  The imp has been hiding in its basket all evening, peeking out at you sheepishly.

But honestly, you aren’t sure what happened or whose fault it was.  Neither of you were there to see it go down.  You know that for some reason, Jake drank some of the ghoul’s blood. You know because his breath reeked of it, and he made himself very ill with it.

You gave Jake your blood, which seemed to cure him, like it always does.

Now that the immediate danger is gone, you sit on the edge of the bed, watching Jake sleep.  You gently feather your fingers through his hair, and you smile when Jake leans his cheek into your touch.

Nothing about Jake makes any sense at all.  You know that things changed after you bonded with him. You knew they would.  But you didn’t expect it to change quite like it did.

As John has so conveniently pointed out several times, your bond is killing Jake.  You’re a demon, and he’s a human.  Human souls aren’t capable of handling a bond with a demon.

You knew that.  Somehow you think Jake also knew that.  Yet, you bonded anyway. You desperately wanted Jake to be your human.

But Jake was always more than just your human.  You knew from the moment you saw him that Jake was your mate.  With each passing day, you are able to sense more from him.  You hear more of his thoughts, and you think he hears some of yours.

Thankfully, he didn’t seem to hear the very clear concern you had about Caliborn’s return this evening.  You still don’t know what to do about that. 

And then, there’s Jake’s peculiar behavior as of late.  John was feverish this evening, but he told Dave repeatedly about how Jake climbed the wall and leapt to the street lamp far away.  That isn’t something a human can do.  Either John was mistaken in his feverish daze, or something very impossible is happening to your mate.

Could your mate be changing?  Could Jake be becoming like you?

You huff and shake your head.  There’s no way. 

Logically, it isn’t possible.  You are a man of logic and facts. 

A human can’t become a vampire. That has never happened in all of the history of Derse.  You learned the ancient lore long ago. Bonds with humans tie their soul to the demon’s.

Bonds with humans slowly drain the human’s soul.

Bonds with humans kill them.

You knew the risk of giving Jake part of your soul when you bonded.  You knew that it would probably kill you too.  But you didn’t think of what it might do to Jake.

Could your soul be changing him?

You process the facts quickly in your mind, calculating probabilities over and over again.  Despite what you see, you _know_ it isn’t possible.

It’s not possible.

No closer to answers than you were before, you lay down beside Jake and fall asleep.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A song for you! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9ZwN7s20ec


	14. Metamorphosis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hungry for the kill, but this hunger, it isn't you.  
> Voices disappear when you are speaking in somber tunes.  
> I will be the wolf and when you're starving, you'll need it too.  
> Hungry for the kill, but this hunger, it isn't you.  
> It isn't you, it isn't..." -[ "Hunger" by Of Monsters and Men](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n106Qo0D948)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya! Sachi, here! A few notes with this chapter. The rp between myself and the wonderful slacker is incredibly long and convoluted. We considered what to leave in and what to take out. Originally for this story, we were going to take out a main thing in this chapter, for the sake of the ships and the readers who might not like it. But it's actually incredibly important for this story that we leave it in. All things will make sense, and if the changes to the tags aren't your cup of tea, we apologize. Either way, we're just gonna keep right on truckin'. (viva la windicuffs)

You wake up to a small chirp in your ear. Blearily you open your eyes to see Charlie the imp patting your cheek, his red eyes bright in the dark of Dirk's room.

You're Jake English, and you were sleeping so well.

"Whassa matter?" You ask softly, petting Charlie's impy head, though you're certain you can guess. He wants fruit, and the fridge is securely closed. Charlie climbs onto your head while you get out of bed, shuffling across the room to the stairs. You think about that blasted nightlight you kept meaning to buy. Suddenly, the need for it is less. You can move around the dark of Dirk's room just fine.

You must've just gotten used to it.

The shades upstairs are drawn closed but a few rays of harmless sunshine are peeking through. You know Dirk has some special kind of windows that block out the sunlight, and you find yourself...relieved at that for some odd reason. As you pull some grapes and a small melon out of the fridge for Charlie, you look at the time on the stove. You have a couple hours before your shift at the shop begins. Good. Now you don't have to rush.

You lean against the counter and watch Charlie happily munch on the grapes, his wide eyes looking gratefully up at you every now and then. You smile and pet him, smoothing the wild fuzz on his head with your finger. Charlie is so sweet and cute. You don't know why Dirk is still so averted to having him, but you're certain he'll warm up to Charlie soon enough. It's not as if he has much of a choice.

Leaving Charlie to his breakfast, you shuffle back downstairs, padding across the darkness of Dirk's room to your phone. You open your phone's alarm to see you never actually turned the alarm on. Frowning, you try to remember the night before. You're certain you turned it on! This sickness has gotten you all out of sorts. You're lucky you woke up early enough to make it to work on time.

Speaking of the sickness, it's definitely returned in full force. You feel sick to your stomach, much too sick to even chance breakfast. Maybe you can find something later to munch on. Nothing seems too appetizing, and even the effort of cooking something makes you want to curl into a ball and moan on the floor.

You're on your way to the bathroom to get ready for the day when you hear a small pinging noise. You realize Dirk's glasses are glowing bright red, and you pick them up before flicking on the bathroom light, closing the door behind you so Dirk can sleep. You place the glasses on your face and prepare for the red text to flood your vision.

You're up early.  Hal sends. You nod, stifling a yawn under your hand.

"Charlie is an insistent little thing when he's hungry. I'm grateful he woke me up though. I'd have slept all day if he hadn't."

You need the sleep. You're sick.

"All these doctors in my life, suddenly!" You laugh and shake your head. "Between Dirk and John I've heard enough of this! And now you too, Hal?"

Not our faults we care about you. Especially since you don't seem to understand how rough you look.

You observe yourself in the mirror with a frown. You have realized you look awful, but there isn't a whole lot you can do to spruce yourself up. You've lost a lot of weight, and you look like a diseased, sickly thing, the dark circles under your eyes looking more and more like bruises. You sigh.

"Understanding and dwelling are two entirely different matter, Hal," you inform him. "Believe me, I feel worse than I look."

You reach for your toothbrush and begin brushing your teeth as Hal replies.

You know, maybe a visit to the doctor wouldn't be so bad. I mean, maybe they can help? I can't see how it would make anything worse. You work all the time so you've gotta have health insurance, right? Why pay for it if you aren't using it? I bet a lot of it is exhaustion anyway. You work harder than anyone I've ever seen and you never buy anything for yourself. You're such an admirable guy, Jake.

You feel yourself blushing at Hal's words. He's been so nice to you lately. You don't get much of a chance to talk to him, but when you do he's always gushing praise at you.

It's crazy, the stuff you miss when you've been without a body for so long. I'm seriously trying to remember how toothpaste tastes.

You spit into the sink and rinse your mouth out before responding. "You can't remember the taste of mint? I suppose I've never thought about how to describe it before! It's like...being really cold but it's nice at the same time! Like being refreshed!"

That's one way to put it. I wish I could really taste it though. It'd be invigorating to taste it on your breath, especially if you'd make that cute, breathless noise you make when Dirk kisses you.

You blink and rack your brains as you try to remember whether or not Hal has ever said these types of things to you before. Dirk said Hal was a sex addict. Maybe that's all this is. You decide to brush it off, but Hal seems to have other plans.

I've thought a lot about that lately, obsessively, some might say. What you taste like. What you feel like. I can only get so much from Dirk. He guards his thoughts from me because he doesn't like me prying into them but I can't stop, Jake. I can't think of anything else but you.

"W-well I'm...certainly nothing special, Hal. I don't know how to answer any of those questions... I'm sorry." And you _are_. You're sorry you can't help Hal. You're sorry he thinks of these things because he misses having a body. You think of Hal as a good friend and you want to give him the things he rightly deserves.

Ha, it's insane to me how fucking...pure _you are. It's like this otherworldly force of its own. Not like Dirk but some kind of magic all the same. Is it because your grandmother is a witch? Are you able to cast spells too, Jake? All the things I've seen you do... Handling stress and Dirk the way you do... God, Jake, you're so incredible. I could talk to you all day about how wonderful you are, if you'd let me._ __

Again, you find yourself blushing, a small squeak emitting from you as Hal bombards you with praise.

__

"Hal..." you say quietly, not sure if you want him to stop or keep going.

__

I find myself just wanting to give you the world, Jake. Anything you want. Everything about you tells me you deserve it. Just hearing you say my name in your gorgeous voice is enough to make me die again and I wouldn't even care. You're so beautiful, Jake. Dirk tells you all the time, doesn't he? How beautiful you are. Still, I can tell you don't believe it. You're the most beautiful creature I've ever seen. I admit being without a body has made me envious of many things Dirk's had but this is different.

__

You release the breath you didn't know you were holding in. You're so caught up in Hal's words. You've never spoken to anyone so smooth, so sure. You find yourself laughing nervously.

__

"Oh, Hal... I can tell you've been alone with Dirk too much. If you think I'm something to write home about, it's only because you're forced to spend so much time with me! I really appreciate the kind words, though. You know how to perk a guy up! I needed a pickup before today's long shift, that's for certain."

__

Please don't go to work. You need to rest. Stay here with me and Dirk instead.

__

"A tempting offer, Hal! I need to keep working. It distracts me and a distraction is just what the doctor ordered. If I stay here I'll just waste the entire day and that's no good for anyone."

__

You comb through your wild hair, huffing when it does no good, and then go to the bedroom again, dressing somehow in the dark. Your pants won't stay on, so you end up grabbing one of Dirk's belts. You scoff when you find it's too big for you, and you go back into the kitchen, using a knife to punch another belt hole so the blasted thing will keep your pants up.

__

Jake, come on, just go back to bed. I can tell from your thoughts that you want to. That damn coffee shop isn't going anywhere and I'm sure the other employees can handle it.

__

"Oh, I know they can. But you won't see me calling anyone in to work _my_ shift, Hal! That's unkind in a non-emergency situation. Besides, money doesn't make itself, now does it?"

__

You trek back downstairs and look at your sleeping mate. Dirk looks so snug. You cover him up and kiss his forehead, giggling when he purrs in his sleep. He's so exhausted from being with you in the daytime hours. You decide to let him rest for the day. He needs it more than you do. You place Hal gently back on the table, ignoring his continuous pings for attention. You know he's just going to keep telling you to skip work and you've heard enough of that for one morning, thank you very much.

__

You used to love the early morning walk to work. From your grandmother's house, it was a scenic little adventure, one lined with joggers and small animals scrounging for breakfast. From Dirk's suburban house you encounter far more people than usual, most of them getting up for work just like you, though they're far more well-dressed. You offer a few kindly good mornings as you pass, already feeling worn out from your few steps. It's freezing out, but the sun on your back has you burning up in your skin. It drains you, and you count the moments before you can be inside the coffee shop, putting some distance between yourself and the sun's insistent rays.

__

You unlock the door to open the store, but before you can lock it again you see John jogging towards you, surprise in his eyes.

__

"Jake! I thought I was opening for you today!" he says before he captures you in a bone-crushing hug.

__

"Huh? When was this decided?" you ask, confused. He frowns and shows you his phone.

__

"Last night! You pestered me, remember?"

__

You don't, in fact, and as you read over the messages you feel your eyes narrowing.

__

GT: Hey John, my good fellow, tally ho and all that jazz.

__

EB: jake? i thought you'd be asleep the rest of the night. i just woke up too though. my memories of tonight are still a little hazy but i can't help thinking i saw something really...strange.

__

GT: Yeah tonight was weird. Speaking of weird, let me run an idea by you. I'm super tired. In fact, I'm so tired that just a few seconds ago I was drooling into Dirk's pillow. So I'm thinking tomorrow I'll take some time to rest my fine self, if that's cool with you.

__

EB: you're seriously asking me to open for you? wow. you must really not feel well. :(

__

GT: I feel like complete shit, my good man. So you're okay with me taking off tomorrow?

__

EB: of course! i just want you to feel better. i don't mind at all.

__

GT: You're a rad fellow, John. A good cousin and stuff. A damn nice dude, some might say. I'll just take my perky butt to bed now. Talk to you another time and not about this conversation we are having because it won't be brought up again.

__

EB: uh, okay. goodnight, jake!

__

"That prick! This was Dirk. Now I'm thinking _he_ was the one that shut off my alarms! I _knew_ I set them!" You stomp your feet a little and glare up at John. "He did a horrible impression of me and you still bought it!"

__

"I just thought you were sick! But really, if you wanna go, you can. I'm already up and already here, so you can go back to bed. I don't mind," John says, gesturing outside. You frown at him.

__

"No! Then that would be admitting defeat! I'll show Dirk that I'm perfectly capable of being here, John, and while I'm at it, I'll show you too!"

__

John groans behind you but he moves about the store in silence as the two of you set up. There's still a little time before you have to open for business, so as soon as you brew the coffee, you sit in a chair, watching John flit around to put the pastries in the oven. He looks at you with concern in his eyes.

__

"Jake... Please go—"

__

" _No,"_ you huff, glaring at him. "You and Dirk both are just the worst when you insist on taking care of me! I'm fine! Worry about something else!"

__

He throws his hands up in exasperation but doesn't refute, and you keep pouting in his direction just for good measure. He ends up bringing you a scone, sitting across from you and eyeing you closely.

__

"At least eat that, if you can. Do you want me to bring you some coffee?" he asks, and you shake your head.

__

"Nothing sounds good," you murmur, picking at the crumbly scone. "It's all sort of...tasteless? I'm hungry but I can't eat. I can't remember the last time I ate something, if I'm honest."

__

"Jake..." His hand rests on top of yours, and you look up at him. "Just... I'm so worried about you. Tell me how I can help. Is there anything I can do?"

__

"I don't think so. Having your company for now is nice."

__

John nods and bites his lip. "Last night... Was that real? Did you really attack that monster?"

__

"I don't...remember. You were hurt and I just—reacted. It's all fuzzy. I remember biting and tasting something horrible. I was so sick after. But everything else is just a blur." You rest your head on the table.

__

"It's like you're turning into one of them," John says. "A vampire. Or something. You— The things you did last night... Humans can't do that."

__

"Well if I understand mating right, it's just that I have a large chunk of Dirk's soul and he has a large chunk of mine. So it's...natural that I have some demonic traits. I think." You sigh and shake your head. "I can't be like Dirk. It's impossible, as much as I wish I could be."

__

"We don't know that for sure," John says. "I mean, humans don't usually mate with demons. So who knows what's happening to you? Even Dave said it's all really fucked up and he has no idea what's going on with you. Dirk is like...in denial or something. But I've known you all my life, Jake, and you're...different."

__

He squeezes your hand and looks at you so intensely you find yourself blushing once more. All the men in your life are very intense today.

__

"You have that same aura that Dirk and Dave do. Like you're still you but...ethereal. Like you don't belong here but you're here because you want to be. You're just—like them."

__

"John, I don't... I couldn't bear to get my hopes up... If I thought I could be like Dirk...and then it didn't happen... John, that would truly destroy me. Whatever is happening, I can't put a name on it until I know for sure."

__

He nods at you, still seeming unconvinced. You brace yourself on the table and stand up, swaying as a wave of vertigo crashes over you. John is there immediately, steadying you, a warmth in front of you that you just want to sink into. Or better yet, sink your _teeth_ into...

__

"Jake! Are you okay?" John squeaks as you bury your face into his neck, inhaling him. He tenses as you lick a stripe up his neck, to his ear, his skin heating up under your sure touch. "Jake?" His voice rumbles against your ear.

__

You don't think. You _can't_ think. Your teeth are in his neck before you can stop yourself.

__

" _Jake..."_ John breathes, his hands that were pushing you uncertainly now clenching in your shirt, pulling you closer. You hum and swallow his delicious blood, reminding yourself that you're _starving_ and John offered to give you anything you need. John's legs start to tremble, and when he sinks back into his chair, you settle into his lap, listening to him pant in your ear. It's so good, the way he's giving in to you. His blood tastes sweet, sweeter than any stupid pastry.

__

Suddenly, you're acutely aware of what you're doing. Perhaps it's because you've drank your fill for now, or because you can feel John's dick pressing against yours through the fabric of your jeans. Either way you tear yourself away from him, toppling backwards over the table until you're crashing to the floor.

__

"Jake!" John is quickly in front of you, trying to help you up again.

__

"Shit, John, I don't— I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to, it just happened and—"

__

"Shh, hey, it's okay. Come here. You didn't mean to. Just...calm down for a second, okay?" John pulls you up and looks at you with wonder and adoration in his blue eyes. "Whatever you need. I told you. I just want to help."

__

Something inside you is screaming, telling you to _take_. Take what's being offered. Take until there's nothing left. You quickly shake your head, whining in the back of your throat, terrified of your own thoughts.

__

"John, no, just get away from me, please, I'm awful and David is going to kill me for biting you—"

__

"Dave knows you're sick and he...mentioned this might be what you need. Dirk isn't here. You... You're better now?" John asks quietly, and when you nod, he exhales shakily. "Okay then, this was good. You were just thirsty."

__

Why is John being so understanding about this? You watched him have a crisis over liking Dave just a couple of weeks ago, and now he's perfectly fine with you practically jumping him in the middle of the coffee shop? You decide not to press. This never happened, as far as you're concerned. You hurry to the coffee machine as John goes to unlock the doors, his eyes straying to you bashfully while you chug a cup of espresso to try and quench your remaining thirst.

__

The morning rush is awful, and you're eternally grateful to John for being here with you, helping you with all these demanding people. You used to love the rush and the quick chit-chat with the customers, but today you can't bring yourself to hear anything they're saying, your eyes fixed on their necks, their bobbing, unguarded throats. Your hands clench into fists as you catch yourself, and you're careful to smile and bring your eyes back to theirs, each customer's bleary morning smile completely oblivious to your sinister thoughts. By the time the rush is over, it's past noon, and the bell jingles to signal the last customer's departure. You're softly rumbling in your throat, something resembling...a growl.

__

"Jake," John says softly beside you, his hand suddenly on your shoulder. Something inside you snaps. In an instant, you have him pressed against the back wall, your mouth on his neck again, your teeth sinking into him. He moans in pleasure and you love it, your body flattening to his, holding him to you as his hands trail down your back, tracing patterns in your shirt.

__

"Jake... F-fuck, Jake..." he whispers, and you find yourself pressing harder against him, rubbing your dick against his, making him cry out under you. You do it again. And again.

__

You're gone. You're gone and what's left isn't human. Doesn't understand.

__

"Ah...! Jake! Jake, nnn, fuck, we...we can't... You...!" John babbles, but he never pushes you away, never tries to stop you. He holds you close, moving with you, grinding into you as you grind into him, both of you hot, sweating, panting for each other. His dick is so hard for you, feels so good, and you want to feel it when he lets go, lets you have it. He's offered himself to you on a silver platter and the demon inside won't let you pass up without tasting him. He's a banquet and this is only the appetizer.

__

He trembles and writhes against you, crying out as he comes in his pants for you, and you're quick to follow, your dick pulsing against his as you're both reduced to a keening, helpless mess. When you pull away from his neck at last, licking your bite closed, he's looking at you with hooded eyes, his mouth open as he pants for air.

__

Again, reality crashes on you like an evil, hating beast, your mind catching up to your traitorous body at last. You jolt away from him, terrified and disgusted by what you've done, but John merely pulls you back to him, looking around the store to make sure the two of you are still alone before he pulls your forehead against his, studying you.

__

"It's okay," he says softly. "You're okay. We need to go clean up before anyone sees." You're blown apart by what just happened and by _him_ , your mind unable to wrap around all of this as he leads you to the one person bathroom and smiles at you sheepishly before he unfastens his pants, turning his back on you as he sets to cleaning himself up.

__

"John, I just— I don't know what's happening to me, I'm not myself and I... Oh, John, I'm so sorry, I don't even know how to apologize enough!" Tears come to your eyes and your voice breaks. "I can't stop it. I can't stop from wanting more. I can't control my own body, John, and I need you to leave, okay, and get Dirk and tell him to come tie me down before I do worse—"

__

John's hands are on your face then, wiping at your tears as his blue eyes widen with concern. You whine, not trusting this close proximity, but he still keeps you close, cupping your cheeks and just giving you time to breathe and calm down.

__

"I'm not mad, Jake. I'm not upset," he murmurs, and you find yourself scoffing.

__

" _Why?"_ you ask, and he shakes his head.

__

"Because you're you. All my life you've taken care of me and I want to help you now while you need it." He looks at you determinedly. "I'm not scared of you. I know you won't hurt me. And better you bite me than some stranger. We don't need Dirk here, alright? I can handle it."

__

" _I_ can't handle it, John," you tell him in a broken voice, and he frowns at you, petting your cheeks again.

__

"You can handle anything. You've always told me that."

__

You gather yourself as he holds you, something about his understanding making this worse. He needs to run from you, doesn't he? You're something different now, something threatening. You aren't his older cousin now, you're someone else, and he's still too close to you. You're keyed up even now, and he's the closest one to you that can help.

__

Quickly, you jerk away from him, cleaning yourself in silence while he does the same, both of you shyly avoiding each other's gazes. By the time you've left the bathroom, there's a couple of people in line, and you hurry to take care of them, quashing your current thoughts, though in the back of your mind you're nothing but grateful that your apron covers the cum stain you couldn't get out of your pants.

__

The afternoon crawls by, and your body is already starving again by the time the sun starts to go down. You're looking at the bright orange and blood red of the sky by the window when John moves to your side again, his hand on your back.

__

"Jake," he says, making you look at him. "It's happening again, isn't it?"

__

You've got nothing to say as he pulls you behind the counter, out the back door into the empty alley behind the store. The patrons inside all have their coffee. Everyone has what they need except for you, but you can't help thinking you're just about to get it.

__

Gently, John presses you to the wall, pulling you to his neck. You whine, pulling back, and he just cups your face again, pulling your face to his, breathing your air as he works to calm you. His lips gently press to yours and you exhale into them, sobbing softly when you break apart. He kisses you again, his arms wrapping around your neck, his mouth opening under yours.

__

What's left of your humanity leaves you, hand in hand with your sanity.

__

Your tongue finds his, both of you moaning when it does. For the first time today, John seems frightened, but he doesn't stop stroking your tongue with his until he's surely devouring your mouth, you too far gone to stop him. His hips move with yours again as he kisses you silly, and weakly you realize this isn't like either of you. Something is happening and you're both helpless to it, your bodies prisoners as they crash together in the waves of this primal hunger.

__

He comes with your name on his breath, his pants wet in front as you follow suit, making the stain from earlier even worse. You whisper his name in return, reaching into his pants for his dick, watching with hungry eyes as his head tips back, John offering his throat to you.

__

You aren't about to deny him.

__

You bite into him as you pump him with your hand, John whimpering as you send his body into shocking waves of overstimulation. He's yours... This human is _yours_. He's so good, offering himself to you like this.

__

You pull away from his neck to crash your lips to his again, swallowing the moan he gives as he comes in your hand. Still, you want more. You don't stop stroking him, even when he cries your name in a pleading voice. He needs to give you more. You _need_ more.

__

You don't know how long you're there with him in that other realm of existence, but soon you're both a complete mess, the store and work long forgotten as you devour him and he willingly lets you. It isn't until you're being yanked away from John that you realize anything else is happening around the two of you.

__

"What the _fuck_ do you think you're doing?!" Dave asks, slamming you to the wall. You snarl at him, barely registering who he is. You weren't done! You need more time! You kick your legs out at him but he's stronger than you, his body holding yours captive while John paws at him, trying to get to you. Dave pulls out his phone, growling into it while you struggle against him, trying to keep eating the feast of John's offered soul. Dave keeps you still, batting John away when John finally gets hold of your shirt, tugging at it. You're aware of shuffling, of a growling conversation you barely hear, of Dave being torn away too before a very different set of arms has you, the scent of your mate filling your nose.

__

"Baby," a fearful voice says, and you're quick to latch onto him instead, catching his lips with yours, letting him know how in need you are. He growls softly, lifting you, tearing your jeans away with a swipe of his claws. Your mind goes blank as he carefully smears your cum all over his dick before he slides into you, lowering your body onto him, filling you, the static of your mind quietening down as you finally get what you needed. Your sex is rough, rushed, messy, your back scratching against the hard bricks of the building he has you pressed against. You bite into him, gulping him greedily as he does the same to you, and when you come this time, it finally seems to do you some good, the heat inside you disappearing.

__

"Dirk..." you whisper, a soft, barely audible purr rumbling in your throat as his dick throbs inside you, his cum filling you up.

__

"Baby," he replies, staying inside you, pulling you to kiss him. "Mine. Always mine. _Only_ mine."

__

You nod, hypnotized by him, holding him as tight as you can before the blackness at the edges of your mind cascades upon you, taking you into a dreamless sleep.

***

You're Dave Strider, and while your brother takes care of the rampaging Jake, you're left to tend to your own mate, who seems incredibly eager to get back to Jake, John swatting at you meekly as he whines and writhes in your grasp, crying as Dirk fucks Jake against the wall.

__

"John—fuck, babe, stop fightin' me!" You growl at him, forcing him to look at you. " _I'm_ your mate! Not Jake!"

__

John doesn't seem to hear you, his eyes still on Jake as he reaches for him. With a snarl, you bite into him, making him cry out and cum all over himself, his blue eyes finally settling on you, seeing you for the first time since you got here.

__

"Dave..." he moans, flopping against you, out like a light. You growl, picking him up, narrowing your eyes at Dirk as he cradles the unconscious Jake to him.

__

"You keep that fuckin' menace _away_ from us! Not just us, but everyone! He's unstable, Dirk! He's a new demon with no idea how to use his powers! Look what he fuckin' did to my mate!"

__

"He didn't mean to! He was starving to damn death, so just fuck off!" Dirk hisses at you, his eyes bright behind his shades. "I don't know why this happened but—"

__

"I just _told_ you why! How the hell can you be _this_ stupid?! He clearly isn't human anymore, and you've just been lettin' him run around, doin' whatever he wants to! I'll _kill_ him if this happens again!"

__

Dirk roars at you, and you swear even his shades flash bright red at your words.

__

"Don't you _dare_ threaten my MATE!" he shouts, the mere strength of his aura alone pushing you back. "You wanna keep John locked away from us, I couldn't care less, but if you think you're gonna lay a hand on Baby's head, you've got another fucking thing coming!"

__

You bare your fangs at him, John's warm body in your arms the only thing stopping you from leaping at Dirk and bashing his face in. Without another word you turn on your heel, running through the city to your house, leaving Dirk to deal with the store and his insane mate.

***

You wake up feeling confused and hungover, your body stiff and sore. You're Jake again, and you're vaguely aware of hands petting through your hair. You wiggle around to find you're laying on top of someone.

__

"Ngh," you offer.

__

"You awake now, baby?" Dirk asks you softly.

__

"Mmm..." You lift your head to look at him, realizing you're in his bed. "Wha... I was... Wasn't I working?"

__

"You were. Now you're not." He wraps his arms around you, squeezing you until you squeak. "Scared the fuck out of me, baby."

__

"What happened? I don't..." You sit up and try to pull back but he's holding you too tightly, his face buried in your neck. You sit still and think about the events of the morning and the hazy afternoon, and slowly, tortuously, it all comes back to you.

__

For a long time, you don't say anything. Finally, you feel like you have to.

__

"Is John alright?" you ask softly.

__

"He's fine. He's with Dave," Dirk says. You nod.

__

"Are... Are _you_ alright?" you ask, and Dirk pulls back to look at you.

__

"Me? I'm fine," he says, and you breathe out a tiny disbelieving laugh.

__

"I just— _attacked_ John," you say, your hands starting to shake. "And as if that wasn't bad enough on its own, I _cheated_ on you. I— Dirk, I _betrayed_ you! How can you be okay with that?! There's no way! _I'm_ not okay with it! I ruined everything!" You're slowly starting to hyperventilate, your breaths coming quicker and shorter, and Dirk holds his hands up, his eyes wide.

__

"Whoa, hey, Jake—" He cups your face and forces you to look at him. "You didn't do anything wrong. Okay? Calm down. You're getting all worked up and you don't have to be."

__

You look at him incredulously, your eyebrows rising.

__

"Look, something is...happening to you," Dirk says quickly, trying to explain. "I don't know what it is. There's nothing logical about it at all and it's never happened before but... You don't smell human anymore. Or at least you don't always. I've been wracking my brains trying to find anything else to explain but there's no other explanation than this. Something in my soul is changing you."

__

You wait to be surprised, but you knew that already, in some ways. John was very adamant about it earlier, and things have been getting...stranger.

__

"I know it's fucked up from a human standpoint," Dirk continues, "but for a demon—especially a _new_ demon— What happened today was inevitable. If John wasn't there, you would've bitten someone else. You need more blood than I've been giving you."

__

You stare down at the duvet on Dirk's bed. "So what...do we do?"

__

"I've gotta feed more," Dirk says simply. "You've gotta drink from me more often. And...you don't need to leave my side anymore. You shouldn't have today either."

__

"But—!" You exclaim, and he looks at you. "It wasn't to—get away from you. You were so tired... You've been up with me in the sun every day and I can't... I can't have you hurting yourself on my account. You needed rest!"

__

"Baby," Dirk sighs.

__

"And then it...it started happening and I couldn't control it. My body wasn't _mine_. As soon as I realized I...I told John to call you but—"

__

Dirk growls lowly. "You told him to call me?"

__

"Well of course I did! I needed you but he said— He said we could handle it ourselves and then..." You break off there, realizing nothing more needs to be said. Obviously the two of you didn't handle it. At all. You were on autopilot and John was under some stupid trance.

__

"Fuckin' _knew_ it was his fault," Dirk grumbles, and you blink up at him.

__

"It wasn't. He was trying to help me," you say softly, and Dirk glowers at you.

__

"It wasn't his job to! I'm your mate! It's _my_ job! You should've called me anyway!"

__

"I didn't realize _this_ would happen!" You put your hands on his arms and trace his muscles until he calms down, his arms moving out of your grasp as they wrap around you.

__

"It's...complicated, baby," Dirk murmurs into your hair. "We couldn't have seen this coming. A human and a demon haven't bonded before so we couldn't have known."

__

"Do you think I'll...be like you? A vampire?" You ask him, and his eyes light up.

__

"I want that more than anything," he says earnestly, and you nod.

__

"I want that, too."

__

You want to be his mate in every sense of the word. You want to be with him for more than just your measly human existence. You want to be his equal, and not someone he feels the constant need to protect.

__

You just don't think your human body is going to survive this change. And even if he doesn't say so, you know Dirk doesn't think so either.

***

The next morning finds you both in the coffee shop. Dirk had handled things the night before, called Nepeta and asked her to cover the rest of John's shift since you were out of your mind and John was unconscious. Nepeta left you a series of worried texts you need to respond to, but you can't find the energy.

__

Everything _hurts_.

__

You drank from Dirk last night and this morning, but even when it makes you feel better, it ends up making you feel worse, at least before sunset. You know a possible budding vampire like yourself should be avoiding the sun, but you would rather be working and maintaining some sense of normalcy, even if you feel like you'll keel over at any moment. You love your job, and you love the customers.

__

You also really hate the sun.

__

The door jingles, and you smell John before you see him. You spent all night and most of this morning dreading this moment, because what are you supposed to say to your cousin that you sexually attacked the day before? To your shock and surprise, John merely beams at you and launches into your arms, hugging you in that crushing Egbert way, even while his arms are carrying two big shopping bags.

__

"So," he says, "I had an idea."

__

"An idea?" You're wary, but curious all the same.

__

"I went to the store before I came here. I don't think the mayor would care if we redecorated a bit, do you?"

__

The "mayor" is the owner of the coffee shop, who is also always out of town. You see the guy maybe twice a year. He's incredibly nice, but he's scatterbrained and frazzled, and he's working desperately to get his coffee shop chain off the ground. You think his real name is Walter something, but he's always called himself the mayor, and it just kind of stuck.

__

"Redecorated how?" You ask John, and he pulls some thick, dark fabric out of the bags, winking at you.

__

"Don't mind me guys," John says to the customers. "I'm just upgrading us a little bit."

__

You watch him go to the windows and stand on a chair, pull a screwdriver out of his pocket, and start to install a curtain rod. You look between him and the customers you have in line, watching him as you sling coffee for them.

__

Blackout curtains. John is hanging blackout curtains.

__

As soon as they're over the windows, you feel your body responding. Your movements are less sluggish, and you don't feel like you'll pass out at any moment. You move from behind the counter, wandering over to John, who grins at you.

__

"See there? You already look better," he says. "If you're gonna be a vampire, we've gotta start treating you like one."

__

"This is magnificent, John! I feel loads better! I was ready to fall on the floor before you got here!" You look over to Dirk, who's still snoozing in the corner, but you can feel him starting to rouse through your bond.

__

"Poor baby," John says, patting your head, and you glower at him.

__

"Don't you start calling me that, too. Dirk uses it more than my name at this point."

__

"Well, it fits." John grins at you, moving to put on an apron. "Why don't you rest with Dirk for a minute? I can handle things till you feel one-hundred percent."

__

You walk over to your snoozing mate and wiggle under his arm. Dirk purrs happily and pulls you in, licking your cheek affectionately. A small break won't hurt.

***

You're Dave Strider, and the minute you step into the coffee shop, you feel better than you did outside. It's dark inside, nice and cozy. John is behind the counter but he runs towards you when he sees you're up and out in the daytime for him.

__

"Dave! I thought you'd be asleep for a little bit longer!"

__

Yeah, like you were seriously gonna risk letting what happened yesterday happen again today. Jake is in the corner with your brother, both of them sound asleep, but you still think Jake is a dangerous menace. He's a changing demon who can't control his powers. Like hell you'll leave him alone with John.

__

You and John did a lot of talking the night before. A lot of fighting, too. John refuses to see Jake as anything other than someone he has to help and protect, even after what went down. He's still willing, even now, to let Jake feed from him if that's what it takes. You weren't having it. You might have broken your coffee table in your fury. Either way, you can't change John's mind, and you can't make it up for him. All you can do is make sure the same mistakes aren't made again.

__

A group of teenagers come in for coffee, so you gravitate towards a table. There's no need to be in the corner when the entire store is dark. You look towards Jake when you hear him whimper in his sleep. Dirk responds instantly, growling lowly, pulling him closer and nuzzling him until Jake makes a soft, happy sound. They communicate even in their sleep? Gross.

__

You're incredibly jealous.

__

You still want a bond with John more than anything, but you know it won't happen. Even if Jake turns out to be okay after all of this, John is dead-set on school and a career as a doctor. Changing into a vampire and being your mate isn't on his agenda. It breaks your heart over and over, but there's nothing you can do about it. A demon can't choose their mate. John Egbert is yours, and you love him more than you've ever loved anything, even if he hurts you with his decisions.

__

"What are you thinking about?" John asks as he returns to you. He kisses your nose and grins at you, and it's pitiful how much that makes your heart swell.

__

"You." An honest answer is best, right? John blushes.

__

"Yeah? Good things?"

__

"The best things." You kiss him gently, and he beams at you.

__

"Do you like the curtains?" he asks you, and you snort.

__

"You're a regular Martha Stewart, babe," you say, and he swats you. Both of you look over as there's movement on the beanbag in the corner, Jake wobbling over. You glare at him, immediately on edge as he approaches your mate, though, admittedly, he doesn't look dangerous at all right now.

__

"I dreamed about otters again," he says with a wide yawn, rubbing his eyes under his glasses. "Dirk is dreaming about being a sheep. He dreams too loud and it woke me up."

__

"A sheep?" You forget you were supposed to be menacing. "What about sheep?"

__

"He's a sheep. He's prancing around a field and he's a fat, fluffy sheep. Just look how happy he is," Jake says, waving towards Dirk, who is twitching in his sleep, a serene look on his face. "Dirk really enjoys sheep."

__

You snort as John stifles a laugh. You look between John and Jake, and despite yourself, you're grateful their relationship seems to be okay. A lot went down yesterday, but John took it all in stride, and Jake seems better today. You're glad things are the same.

__

"You look so much better!" John says, pulling Jake into a hug, his hands petting down Jake's spine. You're envious. Those piano fingers do sinful things when John decides to use them like that. A steady, rumbling purring noise fills your space, and it takes you a moment to realize it's _Jake_ making that noise. Jake is purring like a demon.

__

"Jake, listen! You _are_ like Dirk and Dave! You're one of them!" John laughs, pulling back to look at Jake. "You're gonna be okay, you're just— You're gonna be okay!" And in his moment of awestruck euphoria, John yanks Jake in for a kiss.

__

Your eyes widen behind your shades, your body flushing. You don't know how to feel. John is _your_ mate. But... You still think it's pretty hot.

__

What can you say? You're a man who knows what he likes. At least you aren't into sex puppets like _some_ people in this coffee shop.

__

Jake smiles at John when they part, the two of them looking over at you and infecting you with their happiness, and you find yourself grinning dumbly too.

__

Things _have_ changed after all.

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT: Look, y'all. My babes. My loves. Dear readers. I need y'all to simmer. SIMMA DOWN NAH. Use your noggins, your lovely thinkpans, and think about how this is a DEMONSTUCK and how DEMONS don't view things the same way as HUMANS. So maybe think about a certain character going through some changes that make these lines we dare not cross a little blurry, and maybe think about how vampires are alluring creatures that any and everyone would throw themselves at if said vampire had no idea how to control his influence. Think about ALL this, and THEN comment about the CONFUSING windicuffs! Use!!!!! Those!!!!! THINKPANS!!!!!!! Thanks!
> 
> Questions? Comments? FAN ART?!?!?!?!?!?! 
> 
>  
> 
> [lateniteslacker](http://lateniteslacker.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
> [sachi](http://sachigram.tumblr.com/)


	15. To Love a Vampire

 

You’re a sheep.  A big fat fluffy sheep.  You are Dirk Strider, and you’re prancing in a giant field of honey-golden wheat, zero fucks given because this is pretty fucking sweet.  The wind picks up, ruffling your sheepy wool and bending the wheat to its will.  Jake is on your back, and you are blissfully, _blissfully_ , happy.

But suddenly, Jake isn’t there anymore.  You turn around, looking around the field in confusion. 

What happened?  Where did Jake go?

The field of wheat disappears, and the coffee shop where Jake works appears around you.

And then you see it.

Jake is _kissing_ John.

You’re suddenly not a sheep anymore.  You’re very much a vampire, and you’re _extremely_ pissed.

The growl builds in your throat before you can stop to think about it. You’re still half-way in between sleep and wakefulness.  You don’t take the time to realize that there are blackout curtains on the store windows now.  You don’t process that it’s still morning and that the store is open.  You don’t care that there are still customers in the shop.

Your _mate_ is _kissing someone else_.

In a flash of speed, you’re beside Jake and John, tearing your mate away from the human.

“The _fuck_ do you think you’re doing?!” you growl at John.

Dave, little shit that he is, doesn’t seem to realize what’s wrong.  He actually growls back at you a little and says, “they’re havin’ a moment!  Fuck, Dirk, what’s your problem?!”

“My _problem_ is that—” you break off, suddenly realizing exactly where you’re standing.  You finally notice that there are several pairs of very human eyes on you.  With your little outburst, you’ve commanded the attention of everyone in the shop, whether you wanted it or not.

You force the growl out of your voice and say, “Jake is _my_ _boyfriend_ and John is _your_ _boyfriend_.  And after what happened yesterday, you should care more about shit like this happening.”

“Awww snap!” someone who sounds suspiciously like Cronus says from the crowd.

You growl a little at the crowd and pull Jake to the back of the store, knowing that Dave and John will follow. You are about to throw open the door to the back alley when your vampire senses tell you it’s still bright daylight outside.  You growl at the door and then pull Jake into a tiny storeroom in the back where they keep all the extra supplies.

You’ve heard Dave talk reverently about the storeroom in the past.  You’ve never actually gone inside the room, but Dave has texted you on several occasions with stories of his favorite place in the coffee shop. 

It’s nice and dark in here.  No windows and only one door.  He can come here when he wants to be alone with John.  He also comes here to cry.

You’re pretty sure Dave was kidding about the last one, but you’re gonna make that little shit want to cry if he doesn’t see the fucking light soon.

The four of you cram into the small room and you shut the door from prying human eyes and ears.  You can see perfectly fine, but John looks a little uncomfortable in the pitch darkness.  Jake reaches out to comfort his cousin and you growl again, pulling Jake’s arm away.

Dave is the one to actually pull the cord for the single lightbulb hanging from the ceiling, allowing John to see too.  “Chill the fuck out, Dirk!  You’re scarin’ John.”

“Good.  John _should_ be scared.  All of us should be, because this fuckin’ shit isn’t normal,” you growl lowly, gesturing to Jake and John.

Dave growls back at you, “shit’s not normal?  Try lookin’ in the mirror. You’re the one not helpin’ your mate with his own transformation.  He’s changin’ and you can’t seem to wrap your fuckin’ giant egotistical brain around that.”

“If you were so worried about that, you’d keep John away from him and not just watch them make out,” you snarl back.  “This isn’t your own personal porn channel. This is your _mate_. If you really cared about him, you’d keep him from tryin’ to bond with MY mate.”

“Bond?” The word seems to throw Dave for a loop. 

Nobody else would likely be able to tell, but you can read your brother easily.  He gets silent for a moment, and then his expression darkens into one of anger.  You know instantly that he’s talked about bonding with John before.  You also know that the talk must not have gone well. 

If you weren’t so pissed off about this Jake and John situation, you might actually feel pity for the kid.

Predictably, there’s venom in Dave’s voice as he roars back, “Who said anythin’ about bondin’?! Jake’s the one who can’t control himself!  He’s no better than all those demons we kill every night.  Maybe we should add him to the list?”

You don’t even think before decking Dave in the face.  You watch him slam back into the wall, several bags of coffee beans falling off the shelves on top of him. “Don’t you fuckin’ _dare_ think of hurtin’ my mate!  It’s not my fault you don’t have the guts to bond with John.  If your mate doesn’t want you, that’s your own problem.”

“Not the coffee beans!!” Jake cries.

You don’t know what you were expecting Jake to say, but it certainly wasn’t that.  You can only watch as Jake makes a dive for the falling beans, saving several bags before they hit the floor and break open.

Jake does it so quickly.  Inhumanly quickly.

Then Jake turns an angry glare at you and pushes you towards the door.  “Stop it, Dirk!  If you wreck our supplies we’ll run out of coffee and fall down off the top 10 coffee shops on TripAdvisor!”

Jake rescues several more bags of coffee beans from on top of Dave and then throws your brother towards the door.  Dave crashes hard into you, and you almost fall through the door from the force of Jake’s throw. An inhumanly strong throw.

Jake looks at you with a very irate glare and points towards the door.  “You Striders take your funny business elsewhere!  I’m the manager here, and I won’t allow you to wreck my store!”

You’re shocked that your mate doesn’t want you by his side, but when you feel him through your bond, you can tell that he does.  He very much wants you to stay.  But he’s conflicted right now. 

Very conflicted.

“John, help me clean this mess,” Jake says.  He points towards the door and talks to you and Dave like he’s talking to little children.  “Striders, go back to your corner.”

Now it’s your turn to be conflicted.  You don’t want to upset your mate, but you sure as hell aren’t going to leave him alone with John in a room that Dave’s told you is perfect for making out.  You’re about to tell them that when Dave punches you again.  Not hard enough to throw you into the wall and destroy any more of the room, but hard enough to hurt.

“That’s for earlier,” he growls.  But even though his punch was directed at you, his eyes are on Jake and John.  You know Dave doesn’t feel any more comfortable leaving than you do.

Jake looks positively flustered and grumbles, “fine! Then why don’t you two clean up this mess while John and I get back to the store!”

Before you have a chance to argue, Jake has taken John by the hand and pulled him out of the little store room, leaving you and Dave to a mess of coffee beans on the floor.

 

*             *             *

 

You’re suddenly John Egbert, and you’re being pulled out of the storeroom by Jake, leaving two very bewildered vampires behind.  “Striders, I swear!” Jake huffs.

“Jake, are you all right?” you ask him quietly, pulling him aside in the hallway before you head back out into the main area of the shop.

“I’m fine, John.  I just have to sort out the inventory and make note of which coffee beans to restock,” Jake says.  He glances at the storeroom and then pulls the door shut on the Striders. 

Then he turns to you.  Like flipping a switch, the expression behind his eyes changes.  You see him go from the feisty manager of the coffee shop to suddenly a very confused changing vampire.  His brows and lips quiver, and the look in his eyes becomes almost painfully unguarded.  Very softly, he murmurs, “John…”

With one word and a glance, you feel like you’ve suddenly been swooped up off your feet.  It’s as if a giant bird has grabbed you by your shoulders and is carrying you off into the night.  Your head and body feel light.  The world around you seems to fade away into nothingness. 

The only thing you can see is Jake.

Jake’s so beautiful.

Jake is your entire world.

Jake’s emerald eyes captivate you.  His pink lips look so soft and inviting.  Before you even think about it, you’re leaning forward into his warmth, tasting those lips with your tongue.  You run your tongue along Jake’s lips until he allows you inside his mouth.  The back of your neck prickles with anticipation as you feel those sharp incisor teeth growing longer inside Jake’s mouth.

Your body doesn’t feel like your own anymore.  Your body is Jake’s. 

Your _soul_ is Jake’s.

“Bite me, Jake,” you hear yourself whispering to him.  “Take me…”

You feel the wet warmth of his lips on your neck, his tongue licking you, as if to mark you as his.  And just when you feel the sharp edges of his teeth on your skin, you’re being yanked away.

You whine softly as you’re snatched away from Jake.  You’re drifting and suddenly you’re nobody’s.  Desperately, you reach for Jake, wanting him and needing him.

“Babe no,” someone else says, pulling you farther away from Jake.  “You’re not his, John.”

“Jake… Jake!!” you cry, reaching for him.

You sense the person holding you hesitate for a second. 

And then all you see are beautiful, captivating red eyes. 

“Mine,” you hear him murmur. “You’re mine, John.”

“Yours…” You whisper, reaching for him.

“Sleep.”

 

*             *             *

 

You’re Dirk Strider again, and you’re tired of this shit.  You quickly pull Jake to your neck, moaning softly when he immediately bites into you.  Jake didn’t even hesitate this time.  He was ready for blood.  You’re glad that you and Dave stopped them when you did.

“Hey Asshole,” Dave says, drawing your attention to him.  You see him holding a deeply sleeping John in his arms.  “Jake’s out of control.  I had to put John to sleep, so the store’s your problem now.”

Without another word, Dave throws his day cloak over his head and whisks John away.  The bell above the coffee shop door jingles, and you know that you’re on your own for the rest of the day.

Dealing with the coffee shop is annoying.  It’s almost annoying enough to make you forget how much of your blood Jake is drinking.  Almost.

You feel yourself getting a little light-headed, and you gently pull Jake away.  Jake whines softly, an instinctive whimper from the back of his throat.  He swallows the last bit of your blood in his mouth and looks at you with desperate pleading eyes.  “Pet please… still so thirsty.”

How could you possibly say no?

How could you even _think_ he isn’t trying to change into a vampire?

Your body feels light and heavy at the same time. A giddy feeling rushes into your stomach, but one of dread also fills you too.  You’re not sure how it’s possible, but there’s no denying the truth.

Jake’s changing.  He’s really truly changing.  Jake’s trying to become a vampire like you.

You only hope his body will last long enough to make the change.

Suddenly, you’re terrified.  Terrified that if you don’t get his body exactly what it needs that he’ll die.  He’ll truly die.  Your only mate will be gone forever.

You nod quickly to him, eager to give his changing body whatever it needs.  You caress his cheek with your thumb and kiss him lovingly. His skin is cool beneath your fingertips, but still warmer than your own.  When you pull back, you tell him, “I’ll give you all you need, but first I have to feed, Baby.  Think you can handle being at this store by yourself till I’m back?”

You watch, somewhat amazed and relieved as the wanton expression on Jake’s face changes into one of fierce determination.  “Dirk Strider, this is _my_ store.  What makes you think I’m suddenly incapable of making a few lattes?”

A short breathy laugh leaves your lips and you can’t help kissing him again.  Fuck, you love this man so much.  “Then I’ll leave you to it.  Call me if you need anything.  Call me with your soul, it’ll be faster.”

“I…” Jake murmurs.  His words trail off and his expression changes to one of mild confusion as he seems to contemplate your words.  “I never thought about doing that.  I’m not quite sure I’m capable of making soul calls.”

You can’t help rolling your eyes at him from behind your shades.  “You’ve done it before.  A lot.  Trust me, you’ll be able to.”

You kiss him again, then pull your day cloak snugly over you.  You fight your instincts to stay inside as you lay a gloved hand on the back door and walk out into the blaring sunlight.

When you get outside, you’re much more disoriented than you thought you would be.  Daylight saps your strength, and the sun is fierce and bright overhead today.  Your shades are in place and your cloak is wrapped as snugly around you as it can be.  Without it, you’re certain you would be incinerated in a heartbeat on a hot sunny day like today.  Even with your cloak, you feel the uncomfortable burn at your cheeks from indirect sunlight.  You usually sleep away the day in the safety of your basement for a reason.

But Jake needs blood.  You have to feed for him.  Otherwise he might attack other humans.

Or worse, he might die.

With that grim thought in mind, you find a nice darkened alley in the city and begin the long process of calling humans to you and feeding.  You call several humans over, feed just enough that they won’t notice the blood loss, lick their wounds closed, and erase their memory of the event.

It’s harder than usual.  Much much harder.  You do this all the time, but for some reason it’s much more difficult now.  Your soul feels exhausted.  It isn’t until several humans in that you begin to realize it might not just be the sun causing you to feel this way.

It might be Jake.  Jake’s human soul is terrified of this change and resisting it.  Jake’s human body isn’t strong enough to house the soul of a vampire.

Jake’s human body is dying on him.

Before you are completely sated, you find yourself running back to the coffee shop.  You wince as you get burned on the cheek a couple times from bright sunlight reflecting off mirrors and other surfaces.  It’s all small compared to your panic.

You have to see Jake.  You have to make sure he’s ok.

You burst through the door to the store, ready to scoop your dying mate up off the floor.

Jake merely looks over at you with mild perplexion as he hands a dark chocolate mint frappe to a customer.  When you make your way behind the counter to him, he asks you, “Dirk, are you quite all right?”

“Was so worried about you, Baby,” you tell him, your voice cracking a little and betraying your concern.  You pull him into a kiss and then glance around the store.  Nobody seems to be waiting for him.  You quickly pull him back into that little storeroom and shut the door behind you.

Jake gasps when you throw back your hood.  His fingers trace the tender burnt flesh of your cheek, and his expression changes into one of sorrow as he says, “you got burnt.  Pet, you got burnt for me.”

“Doesn’t matter, Baby.  Had to know you were safe,” you murmur, letting him trace your skin.  You feather your fingers through his hair as Jake leans in and licks your burnt skin gently.  You sigh softly, feeling better as Jake licks you.  A soft moan escapes your lips as his tongue moves down the line of your jaw and to your neck.

“Can I?” he asks softly.  You can sense his restraint waning through your bond. Even as he pleads with you, you feel the sharpness of his teeth on your skin.  You want to feel those teeth in your neck, drinking your blood.

You growl softly in response, not saying anything as your grasp tightens a little in his hair.  Without any hesitation, you press his head forward with your hand, making his teeth pierce your skin.

Jake’s hands wind up the sides of your body and up to your scalp. His fingers dig into your hair, mussing your precious hairstyle as he drinks his fill from you.

You feel it healing him, strengthening him.  His body feels more stable with your blood in his veins supporting him.  Even his soul feels more at ease.  You sense that he doesn’t really want to pull away when he does, but he gives you guilty look.  “Sorry. I wanted to keep going, but it’s hurting you.”

Is it?  You didn’t even realize it, because you were so wrapped up in the feeling of Jake drinking from you.  But now that his teeth aren’t in your skin anymore, and his warm wet lips aren’t on your neck, you can feel that your body is weak again.  He’s taken more from you than you planned, and you’ll have to go feed more. 

But you can’t worry about yourself right now.  You’ve got to worry about your mate.  Jake’s the one changing.  Jake’s the one dying.  “You feelin’ better?” you ask him.

Jake smiles at you, kissing you lovingly, “better than better.  Your blood is the best thing for me.  I love you.”

You feel a rumbling in your chest and realize that you’re purring softly for him, so happy and satisfied to hear him say that.  You pull him to your chest, feeling the warmth of his body against yours.  You couldn’t possibly be happier that Jake is yours.

Eventually, he pulls away and murmurs, “the bell jingled.  Customers will be waiting for me.  I have to go.”

You watch him open the door and head outside, fixing his hair and readjusting his apron as he goes out to greet the customers.

It isn’t until you are reaching for the string for the lightbulb that you realize it.

The light was off the whole time.  Jake didn’t have any trouble seeing you.

His change might be more imminent than you thought.

You only hope that Jake’s human body will last. 

 

*             *             *

 

You’re suddenly John Egbert.  At least you think you are. 

It’s hard to remember anything, including who or where you are, when you’re staring into those vivid red eyes.  Finally, you piece together that you are, in fact, John Egbert.  You’re a human and you’re staring into your vampire boyfriend’s crimson eyes.

“Dave?” you finally ask.  Dave slides his shades back on his face as you shift in the bed.  You glance blearily around and realize that you’re in Dave’s bedroom, laying beneath the covers in his bed.  You rub some of the sleep from your eyes and murmur, “what time is it?”

“Ten PM,” you hear him respond. 

“PM?” you ask, furrowing your brow.  Finally, you sit up and look at him.  “Are you sure you don’t mean ten AM?”

“No, it’s nighttime,” he responds, looking away from you.  His face is beyond expressionless, as always, but for some reason you think he sounds a little guilty.  He turns as you shift over and lay a hand on his shoulder.

“Tell me what you’re thinking.  You know I’m shit at reading you,” you murmur.

Dave looks at you and doesn’t say anything.  With his eyes hidden behind those dark sunglasses, he’s even harder to read than before.  Slowly, you reach for them and lift them off his face.  Dave tenses but allows you to do it.

“Tell me what happened,” you urge him quietly.  “The last thing I remember is the coffee shop.  We talked to Jake, and for some reason, some coffee beans fell in the back.  What happened after that?”

Dave visibly tenses more when you mention Jake.  Without the protection of his shades, you see the pain in his eyes. He looks away from you.

You’re growing impatient.  Dave needs to do some talking right now.  “Dave, tell me.  What happened?”

“You tried to get Jake to bond with you,” he finally responds.  Slowly, he tears his eyes away from the floor and looks at you. “Jake’s not even a full vampire yet, and you wanted him to _bond with you_.”

Your breath stills and your eyes widen.  “I… what?!”  You sit back, not believing what you’re hearing.  “No.  No way!  I don’t want anything to do with bonding! There’s no way I told him that!”

Dave can’t hide the visible wound you drive into his soul when you tell him you don’t want anything to do with bonding.  He physically withdraws back from you.  His red eyes look more than hurt.  If you look closely enough, you think he might start… crying?

Quickly, Dave swipes his shades back from your hands and puts them on.  “Anyway, you didn’t bond with him.  Dirk and I stopped that.  I was actually just waiting for you to wake up. That’s why I’m still here. Had to make sure you didn’t sleep your pretty little self into a coma or something.  Not like I routinely influence people or anything.  But it’s nighttime now and there’s demon’s to kill, so I’ve gotta go for a while.”

Dave turns to leave, and for a few seconds you’re stunned by his words.  It takes a few moments to piece together the meaning behind his verbal diarrhea, but eventually you do.

Dave influenced you to stop you from bonding with Jake.  And he’s deeply hurt about it.

Without thinking, you reach out and grab his arm, pulling him back.  You know he’s way stronger than you, and he could pull out of your weak human grasp if he wanted to. 

But he doesn’t.

Dave just stands there as you turn him around to face you again.  You can tell that behind that practiced mask of stoicism he’s hurt. 

“Please don’t run away,” you tell him softly.

Dave doesn’t say anything for a second, but finally he sighs, “I’m not runnin’ away.  This is kinda my house.  I— we can talk about it later.  I’ve gotta kill some demons and—”

“Please. Don’t go, Dave. Let Dirk handle the demons tonight,” you tell him, your voice a quiet whisper.  You need Dave here right now.  Need him to not be so upset with you. 

You need it because he’s your mate.  Because something deep inside you knows that he is yours.  Yours to take care of and love.  Yours to calm and protect.

You can’t have him upset with you.  Not like this.

Dave hesitates.  He glances between you and the stairway up to his front door.  But in the end, he sighs a defeated, “ok.” 

You watch him pull out his phone and send a quick text, probably to Dirk.  Then he puts the phone away and looks back up at you.

Dave stares at you from behind his shades. 

You stare back at him.

You wonder what’s going on inside his head. 

Dave’s probably wondering the same about you.

The silence reaches the point where one of you should have said something by now, but neither of you do.

You stand staring at each other for so long that it’s well past the awkward pause phase.

The silence stretches so long that it moves on to the point where it’s almost funny. 

Unable to help yourself, you crack a small smile.  It could be your imagination, but you think you see the corner of Dave’s lips quirk a little too.

Slowly, you reach out and pull those ridiculous shades off him again.

He lets you do it.  You think you’re probably the only person who has that privilege.  The thought that Dave trusts you so much fills you with warmth.

The warmth in your chest spreads as you’re again captivated by his beautiful red eyes.  You can tell just by looking into his eyes that Dave is completely in love with you.  He’s upset about this bonding business and irritated by your confusion. 

But Dave loves you so much he could never leave you.

Something about that gives you solace and the confidence you need to lean in for a light kiss.

Dave responds immediately, his lips gently moving against yours.  His hands wind their way around your hips, pulling your body closer to his as your lips move along each others.  He traps your lower lip between his, nipping very gently, not nearly hard enough to draw blood. Dave hungrily licks inside your mouth as if he’s desperate to taste you.

Vampires, you have found, are quick to cut to the chase. 

You moan into the kiss, your body falling easily against his.  Your hands wind up above his shoulders, looping around his neck and drawing him in even deeper.  Both of you are craving each other, starving for the intimacy that you know will make this better.

You’re so caught up in kissing Dave that you barely register him pulling you back towards the bed. You hardly even think about the fact that you very well might have _sex_ with Dave soon. 

You, the boy who was so concerned with butt-touching.  A manly handshake was the most physical contact you ever thought you’d have with another guy.

You know what happens after this point.  After two people in love have a disagreement.  After all the kissing and gentle fondling.  After you make it onto the bed, other things will happen.  Things you’ve only read about or watched late at night on your computer alone in your room.

Except that now you’re not alone.  You aren’t sitting by yourself in the darkness of your room, holding back your cries of pleasure with the back of your hand so your dad won’t hear you.  You won’t have to sneak into the bathroom to flush away your embarrassing cum-filled tissues and silently pray that your dad won’t ever catch onto what you’ve been doing.

Here, in Dave’s basement home, there’s nobody to hear you.  You’re alone with Dave, your _vampire boyfriend_ , who is currently eyeing you in a way that makes warmth immediately pool down below your stomach.

Dave lays you down on the bedsheets with a finesse that should make you wonder how many times he’s done this.  But he’s smooth, and somehow you’re not even concerned with that little detail.  You love everything about him, and if he’s done this before, you don’t care.

You’re vaguely aware of his hands on you, sliding underneath your shirt to touch your skin with his slender and slightly chilled fingers.  Dave’s always been just a touch colder than you.  It’s not enough that you ever feel uncomfortable or cold from his touch, but it’s just cool enough that you notice.  Dave’s fingers trail up the hint of your abdominal muscles, reaching up to trace your collar bone, and you inhale a sharp breath.

Dave’s fingers toy with the dips around your neck for a bit, as if he’s getting lost in the ridges of your collarbones, the tendons winding up your neck, and the pulse thrumming through your veins.  It’s long enough to make you wonder what he’s thinking about. 

Who are you kidding.  Your boyfriend is a vampire.  You _know_ what he’s thinking about.

But before you can even breathe a word of it to him, Dave has forced himself to move on.  You think he makes a small regretful sound as he winds his fingers up past your neck.  As his fingers dig into your hair, his nails raking along your scalp, a tiny soft whine leaves the back of your throat, like a plea for more.

Dave doesn’t miss a beat as he settles down on top of you, kissing you silly and giving your body the attention its been craving.  You feel his dick against yours, more than a little hard.  You’d be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t want him.

“Ahhnnn….” You moan softly as he dips his hips, grinding your dicks lightly together beneath your clothes. Immediately, you flush in embarrassment and draw the back of your hand up to your mouth to stifle yourself from making any more shameful sounds.

Dave immediately pulls your hand away.   “Don’t do that.”

Your cheeks go red with flustered embarrassment.  You’ve never known anything other than biting back your moans.

“I wanna hear you make those sounds for me,” Dave says.  You’re acutely aware of his eyes on you, never leaving your face, as he dips his hips and slowly draws your clothed dicks against each other again.  A satisfied little smirk crosses his lips as you fail to hold back another long moan, this one a little louder than the last. 

“Dave, I—” you whine softly as he grinds you together again.  You feel frantic now, like he’s taking away the last bit of control you have over yourself.  Your neck and face and cheeks are burning hot, and you don’t know if you can bring yourself to say the next words.  It takes you a couple seconds, but reluctantly you stammer them out. “—I’ll get loud.  Really loud.”

In response, Dave purposefully grinds you together even harder, drawing a sharp loud cry from you. This time, there is no mistaking Dave’s grin.  “I wanna hear you come for me.”

It’s terribly unfair how alluring he is.  Dave has always easily captivated your interest with his looks and voice alone.  It sends chills down your spine to hear him say he wants you.  Wants to hear these terrible things you’ve always hidden.

Even though you don’t respond, Dave seems to understand how badly you want it.  He works out a slow easy rhythm.  It’s almost languid, the way he rolls his hips against yours and pushes you into the bed.

Dave seems to know exactly how to draw those long unbridled moans out of you.  It terrifies you but also fills you with a sick delight to finally voice how good you feel.  You can’t stop the feeling in the back of your head that it’s _wrong_ to be this loud.  That you shouldn’t be screaming already.

Fuck, are you screaming already?

“Ahhh-AAAHHHH!!!!” you cry, your head thrown back and your body pushing back hot and hard against his.

Yes, clearly you’re screaming already.  And Dave hasn’t even put his dick in you. 

Or… or you in him?  You’re really not sure how that’s going to work.

It turns out you won’t even need to worry about that.  You’re pretty sure you’re both going to come without that extra bit of… of penetration?

“Ddddd…. Dave….. DAVE!!!” You’re not thinking right at all, and you don’t really care.  All you can focus on is Dave, giving you the sweetest pleasure. His body doesn’t seem cold at all anymore. It’s burning hot, and so are you.

The sounds you’re making could never even pass as words, even though you’re trying to speak.  You’re trying to tell Dave how good he is, how good he feels.

You think you might at some point manage to scream out how much you love him before you come.

“That’s it,” Dave says, encouraging you with that last bit of needed pressure against your dick.  “That’s what I wanted to hear.”

You feel your hot sticky cum spreading in your pants, and after the initial bliss wears off, it feels so embarrassing.  A shameful diffusion of wetness and heat.  You didn’t even have time to grab a Kleenex, and you just came in your pants.

But you find you can’t care about that at all, because a few seconds later, you feel the pulsing of Dave’s dick against your own.  You know he’s doing the same as he grips you tighter, his jaw clenched tightly as he breathes harshly against your neck.  You know he’s making a mess of his own underwear, and somehow you know he really doesn’t give a damn.

Your breaths begin to slow and even out, and you’re left acutely aware that something just happened between you and Dave.  Something that you think might be sex, but you’re really not sure.

How does—how does that even work?  You think that more was supposed to happen, but you can’t be completely sure.

All you know is that whatever happened was good.  Even if it did leave a mess in your pants. 

Dave is laying beside you now, cradled into your side.  It’s clear he has absolutely no intention of cleaning up, and with the heavy weight of his body on you, you don’t think you’ll have that option either.  You kind of want to, because you feel gross, but you kind of don’t want to move either.  So instead, you look at his face.  His alluring red eyes are on you, his gaze focused on yours.

No words are spoken between you. Behind his eyes, you know he’s silently pleading for things to be ok between you now.  And—and there’s something else.

A primal hunger.  You’re not sure if it’s for your blood or for sex.  Maybe it’s for both.

But you find that you really don’t have the energy to discuss that with him right now.  You just slept away most of the day, but you’re ready to sleep again.  You shift a little bit, as much as his body draped across yours will allow.  Leaning in and kissing him is effortless and wonderful.

A small smile spreads across Dave’s lips. It causes happiness to bloom in your chest, a chain reaction of pleasant little bursts that travel from your chest all the way down to your fingers and toes.  When Dave kisses you back, you know that everything will be ok.

 

*             *             *

 

You wake up again, sometime later, still John Egbert.  You’re still a little sleepy, but you’ve been roused from your slumber by a very peculiar sensation.

Something’s tickling you.  Something warm and nice.

You’re not awake enough to fully understand this.  A quiet disgruntled noise leaves your throat, and you try to scoot away from the thing that’s tickling you.

But you find that no matter how far you scoot, the tickling follows you.

You wake up a little bit more, enough to realize that it’s not really a ticklish sensation you’re feeling, but a sensitive and slightly pleasurable feeling.  The feeling happens to be on your neck.

That thought makes your breath catch.  Quickly, you find yourself very awake.  It only takes you a few seconds to confirm what’s really going on.

Dave is licking your neck.

You might be mistaken, but you’re pretty sure he’s still asleep.

Dave is _sleep licking_ your neck.

You wonder if he wants to—no, you don’t even need to ask yourself that question.  You _know_ what he wants.  It’s painfully obvious what he wants.

Dave wants your blood.

You knew your boyfriend was a vampire.  You knew that when you started dating him.  You knew that this day would come someday.

You honestly thought it would be sooner.  But Dave has always shown a remarkable amount of restraint.  He’s never once given any indication that he wanted to bite you, even though you assumed he must.

But now, while he’s asleep, it seems his vampire instincts are coming out.  Asleep, Dave doesn’t have the ability to hold them back.

When was the last time he ate?  You think he probably eats every day or so.  But you got him up early yesterday to go to the café.  And then he put you to sleep and brought you back here.  He said he watched you all day while you slept.  And then last night you had that fight and make up sex.

And then you both fell asleep.  And here you are, the next day already.

It’s been a few days since Dave has eaten.  You aren’t sure how long he can go without feeding, but given the licking at your neck, you suspect that Dave has reached his limit.

You shiver as you feel the gentle lick of Dave’s tongue along your neck.  He hasn’t bitten you yet.  You haven’t even felt the sharpness of his teeth on your skin yet.  The only thing you feel is the soft warm wet swipe of his tongue against your skin, as if he’s licking the most delicious popsicle he’s ever tasted.

You’re a little embarrassed to think about it, but you kind of like it.  You like that Dave wants you this much.  It makes you feel important in a peculiar but decidedly wonderful way.  You’re important to Dave, and that’s important to you.

And fuck, he’s _still_ licking your neck!

It sets in slowly, but eventually you start to feel guilty.  You feel bad that you’re seeing this side of him that he clearly tries to hide.  You want him to show you his vampiric side because he wants to, not because he’s sleeping and can’t control himself.

Despite the guilt, you let him keep licking.  You lay beside him, taking in the warmth of his tongue on your neck for several minutes.

But suddenly, it’s more than just his tongue on your neck.  Dave makes a low, nearly predatory growl.  His motions change from tiny sweet licks to rougher and longer sweeps along your neck.

Suddenly, you feel the sharpness of his teeth raking against your skin.

You inhale a quick breath and hold it, suddenly on edge.  It’s not that you don’t want him to bite you.  But… you always thought it would be different?  Actually, you’re not sure what you thought.  It’s not really an idea you had entertained, but now you _are_ entertaining it, and you don’t think you want it to be like this.  You’re not really sure what you want.  But you know you don’t want him to instinctively bite you while he’s sleeping.

You want Dave to be awake.  You want it to mean something.

You have to wake him.

“Dave,” you murmur, pulling away from him gently.  He clings to you unconsciously, not letting you pull far away.  “Dave, hey, you’ve got to wake up.”

You fidget in his grasp, trying to free yourself a little from his affectionate embrace.  Dave really is so clingy when he’s asleep!  Eventually, you maneuver your arm enough to poke him in the face.

Dave swats at your hand, a little pout on his lips.  Clearly he doesn’t want to wake up.

He’s extremely adorable when he’s sleeping.  You can’t help giggling and poking at his cheek again.

Finally, you see his eyes crack open, those beautiful red irises slowly focusing on you. “Mmm…. Morning.”

“Good morning,” you tell him, feeling relieved but also a little disappointed that he’s himself again.  The gentle licking at your neck has stopped. The sharp teeth are hidden carefully inside Dave’s mouth, not visible anymore.   “Geez you sleep a lot.”

Something is a little off about Dave. Maybe it’s just that he’s waking up, but he doesn’t even have a witty retort for you.  Nothing about beauty rest, or anything.

You swallow a little bit, realizing what’s wrong with Dave.  You don’t miss it as his eyes flick over to your neck.  Without the safety of his dark shades, you can see that wine red gaze follow your adam’s apple as it bobs when you swallow.

“You were…” you trail off briefly, debating whether to tell him or not.  It doesn’t take you long to decide that yes, you have to tell him.  The whole point of waking him up was so that this could mean something.  Whatever that something might be.  “…licking my neck last night.”

“I was?” Dave blinks sleepily at you.  “Must’ve been havin’ a good dream… maybe you were a sucker.”

You watch as he yawns and stretches.  Dave is good at hiding those teeth when he wants to. You don’t even catch a glimpse of them.  But you remember the way they felt on your neck.  The thought makes you feel a light flush rise to your cheeks. “I’m not your sucker!” You finally exclaim and roll your eyes at him. 

“Sunlight takes a lot outta me,” Dave admits. Finally, the typical banter you were expecting rolls off his tongue.  “Sleep is my lover, and this bed is my vessel.”

You realize from Dave’s response that it must be morning already.  Of course Dave would instinctively know something like that.  You also realize that Jake is scheduled to work by himself at the coffee shop again.  You can’t let your poor sick cousin work alone.  “Look, I’ll make you coffee whenever you decide to come to the shop.  I’m going early. Jake needs help, even if he won’t ask for it.”

Dave groans dramatically.  “Nooooooo.  Stay here.  Stay here and SLEEP god what is it with you weirdos and not wantin’ to sleep it’s the best goddamn thing there is.”

“I agree, sleep is nice, but I have to help Jake out!” you insist, leaning in and booping his nose playfully.  “Besides.  You wouldn’t want to sleep half your life away, would you?”

You slide closer to him, feeling the warmth of his body against yours. “It _is_ warm in here with you though,” you murmur, loving how your bodies fit so easily next to each other.

Gingerly, you lean in and kiss him on the cheek, and then on the side of the mouth.  You eye him in a playful way and say, “I might be convinced to stay a little bit longer.”

At first, Dave makes a pleased sound, collecting you into his arms and nuzzling into you.  But his comfort is short-lived.  You watch as Dave shifts a little, pulling away from you and frowning as if he’s thinking about something.  It’s almost inaudible, but you hear it when he quietly mutters, “fuck…”

Dave’s expression changes slightly. His face is the same, but his eyes give everything away.  Behind his vibrant red eyes, you see a slight panic.  Fear.  He’s afraid of something. 

He’s afraid of biting you.

You pretend not to notice.  “What is it, Dave?”

Again, you see that torn expression on Dave’s face.  He looks like he wants to kiss you back and also scream at the same time. Finally, he responds.  You would swear that his voice is a little more shaken as he says, “John, I need you to sit tight for maybe…. 20 minutes.  I’ve gotta go out.”

Dave leaves you in the bed as he suddenly gets up and rushes around the room, pulling clothes on.  You watch him first put on his shirt backwards, then swear a little before flipping it around.  Then he stumbles a little as he tries to slip on a sock while also reaching for his shades.

You snatch the shades away before Dave can get them.  You want to see the look in his eyes when you talk to him.  “You need to go out in the daytime?”

You know vampires don’t feed during the daytime.  They’re usually passed out all day for a reason.  If Dave’s rushing out to go eat, he’s either in really bad shape, or really afraid of something else.

Suddenly, a terrible thought comes to your mind.  What if Dave is finally fed up with you?  What if this isn’t about him needing blood? 

It’s irrational, and you know it is, but you get up, hug him to you tightly, and murmur, “don’t go yet.  Stay with me a little bit longer?”

You feel Dave cringe a little.  You hear the sound of him taking a sharp breath that you know he doesn’t need.

What’s it going to be?  Is he tired of you, or does he really need blood that badly?

Time passes.  You hold him and wait.

“John—fuck.” Eventually, he sighs out, “If I stay here, I’m going to bite you.  You don’t want that, alright?  I’ll be back.  I just… I have to go.”

Normal people would probably run for their lives at this point.  Normal people would at the very least let Dave go and do what he’s told you he has to do.

You’ve long ago decided that you’re not normal.  Rather than feeling gripping fear that should really be tearing through you right now, you feel relief. 

Dave still wants you.  Dave didn’t make something up just so he could go.

He’s hungry, and he needs blood.

Well.

You have blood?

You’ve heard from Rose that a vampire’s bite isn’t bad.  Rose’s girlfriend Kanaya is a vampire.  Rose said it’s actually quite nice when Kanaya bites her.  You always thought that sounded scary before.  You didn’t see how Rose could let that happen, no matter how nice it felt.

And how could a bite feel nice?  You really don’t see how.  But now, standing next to Dave, you’re starting to wonder if that matters.  You wonder if you should let him bite you anyway. You get the feeling Dave wouldn’t hesitate too much to bite you.  He said himself that he would.

After all, Dave _is_ your boyfriend.  You _do_ trust him.

“You… you can control it, right?” you ask him quietly, gauging the waters.

“Huh?” Dave murmurs, looking very distracted.  “Yes, dude, I’m old enough. Not gonna hurt the people, just gotta have enough to help me last the day.  Swear I’ll be right back.”

You look into his eyes, and you can clearly see it now that you’re looking for it.  The red color burning in his irises is a slightly different color than last night.  It’s more vivid.  Somehow you doubt that Dave is lying about needing to feed.

“Dave,” you begin, your voice growing quieter.  “Do you think you might want to—”

Your voice trails off, because fuck, this is a lot harder to say than you thought it would be!  How do you just ask your vampire boyfriend to bite you? 

Oh shit.  You really do want it, don’t you?  You want him to bite you.  You want Dave to know how much you trust him.  You want to be a bigger part of his life than just a “human boyfriend.”

And you have plenty of blood to spare, right?  You know Dave wouldn’t hurt you. 

Your voice is quiet, barely audible, as you finish your sentence, “—bite me?”

Dave freezes.  It’s clear you’ve thrown him for a loop.  His hands still on your back, and his fingers grip your shirt a little as he debates your words.  “John… are you sure?  It’s… I mean it won’t hurt, but it’s a big step. And you don’t have to do this because you’re feeling guilty about anything.  You didn’t bond with Jake. We’re good.  And I’m fine the way things are. I’m perfectly cool going out and finding someone else to bite.”

You listen as Dave rambles on and on.  You hear him and kind of don’t hear him at the same time.  You could listen to Dave go on all day, but you know you don’t have all day.  From the way Dave’s eyeing you, his gaze flicking more and more towards your neck, you would guess you probably only have a few minutes at most.

Dave leans forward, his arms circling more around your lower back.  His hands rest on your hips, just shy of your butt.  It looks like it takes him some effort, but he pulls his gaze away from your neck. 

Dave’s eyes are an even more vivid red than they were just a minute ago.  You’re running out of time. 

“I want you to tell me you want this,” Dave says, the playfulness gone from his voice.  His tone is remarkably level as he speaks.  He’s serious, but gentle.  You know he’s baring his soul to you.  “And if you mean it…. I’ll know.”

Dave’s red gaze is powerful and penetrating.  It’s so intense that you know his words are true.  You’re making a very big decision, possibly one of the biggest decisions in your life.  You know this isn’t as big as the bonding thing, but from the way Dave is looking at you, his eyes pleading and a little hopeful, you know that it’s important to him.

Maybe if you give this to him, he’ll understand?  You do love him. You care about him and find him crazy attractive.  And even though you’re not really sure you’re ready for bonding, you want to give him something that will show him your commitment to him.  More than just the simple word “boyfriend.”

“Yeah,” you find yourself saying.  The words flow out of your lips without hesitation. “Yeah, I want this.”

“John…” Dave breathes out.  Somehow, his gaze grows even more intense.  His brows knit as he seems to be debating something.  His eyes dart back down to your neck for a brief moment before he tears his gaze away, looking back into your eyes. 

You wonder what’s going through his mind.  You wonder if he can tell how excited and also nervous you are.  Can he feel the acceleration of your heartbeat?  Does he know how much he means to you? 

Does he know you would give anything for him?

The thought hits you suddenly, making you feel a little weak in the knees.  Thankfully, Dave’s already circled his arms tightly enough around your waist that you’re in no danger of falling.

There’s no time to think about that anymore, because Dave’s lips are on you.  Dave kisses you gently, more tender than his usual kisses.  He leaves a trail of wet heat behind as he begins kissing across your cheek, around the angle of your jaw, and down your neck.  When he reaches your neck, he kisses a little harder.  His tongue darts out and he licks your skin the same way he sleep-licked you not long ago.

Then he stops and draws a shaky breath.  He pulls away just enough to see into your eyes.  Without words, he seems to be asking your permission one last time. 

You’re quick to give it to him.  “Go ahead, Dave.”

The sharp prick of Dave’s teeth floods your senses almost as soon as the words leave your mouth.  You gasp as you feel his teeth sink into your neck. 

Dave LIED about it not hurting!

But it doesn’t hurt that bad.  And actually…

Actually now…

Oh.

_Oh._

“Mmmm….” You moan, holding Dave and leaning into him.  Rose was definitely downplaying when she said this felt nice. 

This feels _way_ better than nice.  This feels…

“NNnnnn…. Dave….” You murmur quietly, your hands clenching the back of Dave’s shirt as he drinks from you.  You feel closer to your vampire boyfriend than you’ve felt to anybody.  Ever.  It’s like letting Dave have a part of you that you haven’t given to anybody before.  “Dave…”

Dave’s bite makes a pleasurable heat spread through your body.  It doesn’t shock you when it collects and pools just below your waist, but you do gasp again when your arousal brushes Dave’s thigh.  Everything seems so hyper-charged right now.

You’re barely aware of what’s happening at all.  You think you might be grinding against his leg, feeling impossibly hard, but you aren’t sure.  All you feel is the warmth of Dave’s body next to yours, his arms around your waist, his lips on your neck.

And all too soon, it’s over.

A soft embarrassing whine leaves your lips as Dave licks your neck a couple times before pulling away.  Dave chuckles at you and murmurs, “can’t get enough of me, huh?”

You shake your head no, and you’re honestly not sure if you mean it as a joke or not.  You want Dave to keep doing whatever he was doing.  It felt so nice.  It felt so _right_.

“Shh, calm down Eggbuns. That’s the bite talking, not you,” Dave says in a way that you think is supposed to be reassuring, but somehow it isn’t.  Dave sounds almost a little sad about it.  If you were in your right frame of mind right now, you might ask him about it.

It’s only after a few more seconds pass and you come back to yourself a little bit, that you realize one mortifying fact.  Yes, you _were_ grinding on Dave’s leg.  You still kind of are.

You stop moving immediately, feeling even more flushed with embarrassment.  You look up into Dave’s eyes, worried that you’ll see disapproval, but instead, he looks slightly amused. “What….. what just happened?” you manage to stammer.

“You just fed me,” Dave responds, suspiciously simply. 

You narrow your eyes at him a little.  “No, not that.  What just happened?!” you demand, pointedly pressing your still impossibly hard dick against his leg again.

“Oh that.”

“Yeah, that.”

Dave glances aside for a second before looking back at you and admitting, “vampire bites might have a kind of sexual effect on humans.  Especially if we love them.”

You glare at him sharply, feeling offended, “you’ve been having sex with everyone you bite?!” 

It’s kind of petty, you know, but you’re still pissed!  Dave is _your_ boyfriend.  Nobody else should be getting turned on and grinding on him but you!

Despite your clear anger, Dave laughs, “I’m not an incubus!  I don’t have sex with them.  They feel a little pleasure, but it’s not like this.”

When you continue to glare at him, he amends, “I mean, they feel a little?  Like it feels nice enough that they don’t run away while I’m feeding, but nobody’s ever done this before.” He says, gesturing to your dick.

Your dick, which you’ve started grinding on him.  Again. 

Fuck, when did you lose this much control over yourself?  What is Dave doing to you?

“Let me take care of you?” Dave asks, his voice pleading.  When you don’t protest, he swoops you up into his arms and carries you back to the bed.  “You took care of me, I wanna repay the favor.”

You find that you can’t exactly protest when Dave deposits you onto the bed.  You watch him pull down your pants and boxers. You wince as you see the cum stain still on your boxers, but you can’t focus on that for long.

Dave’s tongue on your dick is very distracting. 

“Ahhhnnn….. mmmnn!!!” you moan as Dave begins licking you with a tongue that you suspect is far too experienced.  You start to ask him about that, but your words are lost as he takes your entire dick into his mouth and down his throat.

You come in an embarrassingly short few seconds, screaming for Dave in a way that makes you blush.

Dave, much to your horror, drinks down all of your cum.  He makes a show of licking your tip and then licking his lips.  “You really wanted me, didn’t you?”

“Shut up,” you protest weakly, pushing at him half-heartedly.  But when Dave pulls you closer, you’re quick to settle into his warm embrace.  It kind of occurs to you that this might have been sex.  If whatever happened earlier wasn’t sex, then maybe this was.  The thought is brief and fleeting, passing through your foggy brain quickly before you can dwell on it.

“Thought you were going to help Jake out this morning?” Dave chides you, lightly running his fingers along your arm.

“I am. Just… gimme a couple minutes,” you murmur, closing your eyes and resting your head against Dave’s shoulder.  Sleepily, you murmur, “if this is how all your bites are going to end, we need to do this more often.”

Dave’s hand stills on our bicep.  “How often?”

“I don’t want you feeding from anyone else,” you tell him, a yawn overtaking your last words.  “I’m... yours.”

You think Dave murmurs something back.  Something along the lines of being yours too, but you can’t be sure.  Your mind is too hazy from sleepiness and sex and Dave’s vampire bite.

You don’t mind being Dave’s.  You quite like that idea.

You fall asleep to the pleasant thoughts of Dave being yours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at the lovely artwork of scenes from the past couple chapters by JealousCartoonist [here](http://jealouscartoonist.tumblr.com/post/162575067955/for-the-johndaveweek-2017-day1-fanficfanart)   
> and [here](http://jealouscartoonist.tumblr.com/post/160435738265/he-made-a-horrible-impression-of-me-and-you-still)! 
> 
> Thank you so much! Seeing that people still love this fic enough to draw artwork for it gave me that last push to finish this chapter!
> 
> Also, our tumblrs:  
> [lateniteslacker](http://lateniteslacker.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [sachi](http://sachigram.tumblr.com/)


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